I try to go by actions not words on the last three women I've dated. The first one who said, I'd never leave you, and I trusted dearly was my ex-wife. She was distant and we just weren't getting along at all. She'd say one thing to me, and something else completely to others. She then struck me a few times and I just called it quits. Had her removed from my apt and a restraining order placed; filed for divorce; that was four years ago.
Next one didn't count, and she was just the rebound, so I left her as soon as she acted badly. The one after that, I will be honest, I had strong feelings for. After a couple of months, she grabbed my hands and said I finally found what I was looking for. You're all that I've wanted. We planned a trip, she introduced me to her family a few times, etc. I thought it was time to tell her that my family had a white collar criminal past (not me, but I was named mistakenly by the reporter once), she said okay. The next week, she came over and she said she read about all it on Google. She was cold and a bit distant. A few days later I didn't hear from her so I reached out, she said she couldn't talk and was with a friend. I said, okay. She then said, via text, I am not what she was looking for, I said okay. I reached out the next day to tell her I missed her, she said the same. She then said let's catch up in two weeks so I can get my thoughts together. I said, that's not cool with me, nor fair for me to be just hanging around. Have a nice life. She said the same and then again, I really will miss you so much. This hurt like getting hit by a train.
One after that, I jumped the gun way too quick. This was the one who said she was falling for me. We had an slight argument on a really large food/drink bill that she invited me to. I said I had a beer, I am not paying for all those other charges. She ultimately paid, plus tip and she stormed off. I asked are we done? She said I don't know, I said okay. She tried calling the next morning a few times, I refused to talk and said last night was messed up the way you acted, so we're not going to work out. She said, shame you are going to let a little money thing ruin something, but okay.
One after that was a knock out, and we had a lot in common. Always had a great time together. Never really asked for anything, and was contacting me constantly. She's said she loved me and wanted to be exclusive. She did want me to pay for everything, so that was a huge sticking point with me. I mean she never carried any money with her and automatically expect me to pay for everything. Since I limited most things to my place, it wasn't that big of a deal. She then went away for a week against my wishes to see an old friend. She came back and apologized, since I was still pissed at myself from the screw up with the last one, I let her back in to my life. Three weeks later she told me she still wants to see me, but doesn't want to be exclusive any more. I said, okay, that's fine, have a good life. She then tried to change things around, like can I still see you, etc. I said no. She also reached out to me a few times after that, I've ignored her.
The current one also said she loves me and amazed that she found me in her life. She's said she's blessed to have me in her life. She takes me out, as I do with her, and she gets me a ton of crazy gifts. On Christmas, she had bags for me. I got her a few things too, but she out spent me by a lot. I've told her I do not need these things, but she refuses to stop buying me stuff. She makes a lot of money, and I've not been with a woman who consistently buys me these things. I feel bad about that. It's not that I do not like her, I do, but I just am afraid to trust again and let someone in completely. I've left out a few that were just short and flings. I also didn't want my post to be too long.
