Smartone84
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 24, 2006
- Messages
- 312
- Reaction score
- 93
Met a girl online. 33. Attractive. Nice. Outgoing. Has a great job. I'm 34. She's a little extreme with regards to the feminist stuff (i.e. Thought I should call females women and not girls, but didn't really get MAD about it). Not the type that goes to rallies and posts whacky stuff on social media, but absolutely despises Trump and supports everything even remotely liberal, etc. Smokes weed occasionally. Friends with an ex boyfriend of hers. 
That type.
Went on a several nice dates but she also seemed like a big "guard up" type of chick so getting a lay wasn't in the cards right away. That was ok with me as I was actually interested in getting to know her and was enjoying her company. Rare for me. She was fun to talk to, intellectual, smart, etc. I had also never dealt with a real feminist chick before so I actually viewed it all as a bit of a "challenge" if that makes sense.
Finally we get to a 5th date and it's dinner and drinks at the bar she gets completely drunk. First at dinner she gets 2 drinks. Ok no big deal. I had 1. At the bar we each have two glasses of wine. I was done after 2 while she ordered a third. Ok fine, but the girl was SMASHED after this 3rd glass, which was #5 overall don't forget (when including dinner). When she got #4 glass of wine though, (6th overall) it felt downright weird and concerning.
We leave the bar and this girl is HAMMERED. We start making out against a wall and I come up for a breath after about a minute of making out. Suddenly she seems to freak out and asks me why I stopped and accuses me of being GAY. "Who knows, maybe you're gay". It was in this moment where everything changed for me and I felt this girl was a closet lunatic.
We proceed to go back to making out, and I put my hand on her chest slightly. She slaps it away and says don't do that and proceeds to chew me out for doing so. I said I just figured maybe you'd want that. By this point I was done and I felt like I was back in college dealing with some 20 year old drunk chick. Turned off 100%. Eventually I play along with her weirdness but tell her I'm not happy with this attitude. She asks in a drunken slurred voice "Can we do a reset??" and proceeds to kiss me. We continue making out again one last time and this time I grab her hair a bit while making out. She snaps AGAIN slightly and says she doesn't like that and told me this several times before. (To her credit, she said she doesn't like her hair being pulled). Finally I "make up" with her just to get rid of her and I say goodbye. I didn't even want to go back to her place which is where this date may have been finally heading. We talk for another day or so before I finally spill the beans about how I was turned off by her behavior. She is completely apologetic and devastated and says she was wrong to drink that much and hopes I can give her another chance. I just couldn't see past it. Not in my 30's I can't deal with childish crap like that I thought. I've dealt with enough of that in my younger days. I feel upset doing so, but I drop her from my life.
A month later I like a picture on her Instagram. She texts me within 15 minutes of me doing so. We start texting again a bit. She asks me out. I say I'm not really ready for that. Two weeks later I ask her out. It's a lot of fun and it's the good times I remember from the first 4 dates. She continues to text in the days following but I don't respond as much or as quick. I still just can't get the images out of my head by everything that happened, but at the same time i'm wondering what the right move is and maybe this WAS just one bad drunken "incident" and maybe I'm overreacting/overreacted slightly. Eventually I fade from the texting and 2.5 months later (just the other day) I see on social media she's dating someone else.
I wonder... Should I have really cut this girl off?
That type.Went on a several nice dates but she also seemed like a big "guard up" type of chick so getting a lay wasn't in the cards right away. That was ok with me as I was actually interested in getting to know her and was enjoying her company. Rare for me. She was fun to talk to, intellectual, smart, etc. I had also never dealt with a real feminist chick before so I actually viewed it all as a bit of a "challenge" if that makes sense.
Finally we get to a 5th date and it's dinner and drinks at the bar she gets completely drunk. First at dinner she gets 2 drinks. Ok no big deal. I had 1. At the bar we each have two glasses of wine. I was done after 2 while she ordered a third. Ok fine, but the girl was SMASHED after this 3rd glass, which was #5 overall don't forget (when including dinner). When she got #4 glass of wine though, (6th overall) it felt downright weird and concerning.
We leave the bar and this girl is HAMMERED. We start making out against a wall and I come up for a breath after about a minute of making out. Suddenly she seems to freak out and asks me why I stopped and accuses me of being GAY. "Who knows, maybe you're gay". It was in this moment where everything changed for me and I felt this girl was a closet lunatic.
We proceed to go back to making out, and I put my hand on her chest slightly. She slaps it away and says don't do that and proceeds to chew me out for doing so. I said I just figured maybe you'd want that. By this point I was done and I felt like I was back in college dealing with some 20 year old drunk chick. Turned off 100%. Eventually I play along with her weirdness but tell her I'm not happy with this attitude. She asks in a drunken slurred voice "Can we do a reset??" and proceeds to kiss me. We continue making out again one last time and this time I grab her hair a bit while making out. She snaps AGAIN slightly and says she doesn't like that and told me this several times before. (To her credit, she said she doesn't like her hair being pulled). Finally I "make up" with her just to get rid of her and I say goodbye. I didn't even want to go back to her place which is where this date may have been finally heading. We talk for another day or so before I finally spill the beans about how I was turned off by her behavior. She is completely apologetic and devastated and says she was wrong to drink that much and hopes I can give her another chance. I just couldn't see past it. Not in my 30's I can't deal with childish crap like that I thought. I've dealt with enough of that in my younger days. I feel upset doing so, but I drop her from my life.
A month later I like a picture on her Instagram. She texts me within 15 minutes of me doing so. We start texting again a bit. She asks me out. I say I'm not really ready for that. Two weeks later I ask her out. It's a lot of fun and it's the good times I remember from the first 4 dates. She continues to text in the days following but I don't respond as much or as quick. I still just can't get the images out of my head by everything that happened, but at the same time i'm wondering what the right move is and maybe this WAS just one bad drunken "incident" and maybe I'm overreacting/overreacted slightly. Eventually I fade from the texting and 2.5 months later (just the other day) I see on social media she's dating someone else.
I wonder... Should I have really cut this girl off?
