Busy, lost interest, or just looking for orbiter?

[dk1990S111]

Match with a HB9.5 on hinge last Sunday. First few messages are an hour or two apart then she waits about 4 hours to respond. Next day I send her a couple messages and she’s responding pretty quickly so I cut to the chase and ask if she wants to grab coffee or drinks later in the week. She says “that would be nice!” So I tell her I’ll figure out my schedule tomorrow and we’ll sort out the details.

Had a pretty crazy day the next day so I tell her if the rest of the week is like that I’m leaning more towards drinks, she says she’s always down for liquid therapy and we plan on Friday. Friday around noon she says she’s gotta pick up friends from the airport because their ride fell through, very apologetic. Tell her no worries, another time and she responds with “another time for sure!” And that she hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked. Tell her it’s going great and she says she’s glad to hear that, left it at that.

Thoughts on where her head is at? Thinking about reaching out but not looking to waste my time if it’s not even worth messaging her about setting something else up. Don’t worry, getting drinks with another chick tomorrow night

 

[backseatjuan]

You told her your day was hectic? That sounds like you were excusing yourself from not talking to her more often. I say you were talking to her way too much. You'll get more results if you go like that chick, responding every 4 hours or so, or even less often, hinge once per day. I'm not sure what hinge is, but I usually log in to online dating site once per day, sometimes once per week, message 10 girls, answer my messages, log off and go on. Anyway, if hinge sends you reminders on your phone, turn them off, so they don't bother you. Then there is question of at what point did you ask her out. You see, each text conversation has 4 phases to it, Silence, Sht test, platonic, positive flirting. Dudes make mistakes asking out on platonic or sht test phase. There has to be flirting. More over, you don't just go ahead and ask, you make a vague suggestion (example “Are you an adventurous person?”), then vague suggestion (example “What’s your view on drinks and witty banter?”), then find out her schedule, and then set things up. Plus why set things up on a dating up? After flirting online is a perfect time to get her number and call her up.

Low interest? Trying to make you an orbiter? Sht test? All is a possibility. Even her picking up her friends is a possibility, such a nice girl, cares about her friends. Maybe she's showing you value, instead of going to a bar with you.

It's safe to assume everything is a sht test. Just pass it. At this point you semi pass it by not suggesting another time or pursuing and stuff. You gotta pass it more by letting her reply to you. Although, sometime next week or Thursday, it's ok to message, did you pick your friends up or something similar, so that there is no question and she don't have to reply. Essentially, at this point, if she did not initiate, you are back to silence phase.

Consider getting thier nyumbers and giving them a call, otherwise you will get a lot of flakes.

 

[BJP1991]

If you didn’t get her phone number then there was never a legitimate chance. A girl who is interested and actually wants to meet you for a date will give you their phone number when you ask for it.

You didn’t get her number = there’s almost zero chance you’ll get her on a date. Plain and simple when it comes to Hinge/Bumble/Tinder

 

[dk1990S111]

You told her your day was hectic? That sounds like you were excusing yourself from not talking to her more often. I say you were talking to her way too much. You'll get more results if you go like that chick, responding every 4 hours or so, or even less often, hinge once per day. I'm not sure what hinge is, but I usually log in to online dating site once per day, sometimes once per week, message 10 girls, answer my messages, log off and go on. Anyway, if hinge sends you reminders on your phone, turn them off, so they don't bother you. Then there is question of at what point did you ask her out. You see, each text conversation has 4 phases to it, Silence, Sht test, platonic, positive flirting. Dudes make mistakes asking out on platonic or sht test phase. There has to be flirting. More over, you don't just go ahead and ask, you make a vague suggestion (example “Are you an adventurous person?”), then vague suggestion (example “What’s your view on drinks and witty banter?”), then find out her schedule, and then set things up. Plus why set things up on a dating up? After flirting online is a perfect time to get her number and call her up.

Low interest? Trying to make you an orbiter? Sht test? All is a possibility. Even her picking up her friends is a possibility, such a nice girl, cares about her friends. Maybe she's showing you value, instead of going to a bar with you.

It's safe to assume everything is a sht test. Just pass it. At this point you semi pass it by not suggesting another time or pursuing and stuff. You gotta pass it more by letting her reply to you. Although, sometime next week or Thursday, it's ok to message, did you pick your friends up or something similar, so that there is no question and she don't have to reply. Essentially, at this point, if she did not initiate, you are back to silence phase.

Consider getting thier nyumbers and giving them a call, otherwise you will get a lot of flakes.

I should mention that I was just mirroring her response times. Seems like from the beginning she was busy to where it was an hour or two between messages. The following night there was 4 or 5 messages that were pretty much 10 min apart each. I know she has a pretty busy life, can’t message during the day if she has clients there. She is more small town than I’m used to so could just be that she was trying to be polite and not just ghost me in case I ever see her around town. I know she knows of my business, her family uses us.

So later this week just send her a message and get her number if she is receptive?

 

[dk1990S111]

If you didn’t get her phone number then there was never a legitimate chance. A girl who is interested and actually wants to meet you for a date will give you their phone number when you ask for it.

You didn’t get her number = there’s almost zero chance you’ll get her on a date. Plain and simple when it comes to Hinge/Bumble/Tinder

Didn’t even think to ask for it, just went ahead and set up the date. With this newer one I’m talking to I set up the date and then sent my number and told her to let me know if anything comes up. She’s been texting a lot for my taste the last few days but the date is tonight

 

[BJP1991]

Didn’t even think to ask for it, just went ahead and set up the date. With this newer one I’m talking to I set up the date and then sent my number and told her to let me know if anything comes up. She’s been texting a lot for my taste the last few days but the date is tonight

Nice - good luck

 

[The Duke]

Match with a HB9.5 on hinge last Sunday. First few messages are an hour or two apart then she waits about 4 hours to respond. Next day I send her a couple messages and she’s responding pretty quickly so I cut to the chase and ask if she wants to grab coffee or drinks later in the week. She says “that would be nice!” So I tell her I’ll figure out my schedule tomorrow and we’ll sort out the details.

Had a pretty crazy day the next day so I tell her if the rest of the week is like that I’m leaning more towards drinks, she says she’s always down for liquid therapy and we plan on Friday. Friday around noon she says she’s gotta pick up friends from the airport because their ride fell through, very apologetic. Tell her no worries, another time and she responds with “another time for sure!” And that she hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked. Tell her it’s going great and she says she’s glad to hear that, left it at that.

Thoughts on where her head is at? Thinking about reaching out but not looking to waste my time if it’s not even worth messaging her about setting something else up. Don’t worry, getting drinks with another chick tomorrow night

Everything sounds fine to me, although your text convo is boring. Your bigger problem is your confidence and ability to make a decision. You need to lead a woman. Be decisive. Give her two choices on when you can meet and she can pick one. Boom.....done!

I'd pick up the phone and make a call. Set up the date.

ps. if you don't already have her phone number then she is blowing smoke up your azz.

 

[backseatjuan]

So later this week just send her a message and get her number if she is receptive?

You gotta judge where you are right now. She told you she is busy can't make it to a date. Where you think you are? It's easy, sht test, platonic, flriting, what phase? It could be two at the same time. It's either planotic and sht test, or flirting and sht test.

Either way, if you message her Thursday you pass her sht test, or if she messages you first, you pass it with flying colors.

Then you gotta judge where you were before, was it platonic (along with her sht test), then something short and whitty and flirty to get out of platonic zone and start flirting. Was it flirting (along with her sht test), then something flirty, pick up where you left, get it going, get her number. Call. Talk, qualifier question, vague suggestion, find out when she's free, set it up.

I'd prefer a message where you don't ask questions so that she don't have to respond, that way you know exactly where you are and don't come across as needy.

 

[In2theGame]

Friday around noon she says she’s gotta pick up friends from the airport because their ride fell through, very apologetic. Tell her no worries, another time and she responds with “another time for sure!” And that she hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked. Tell her it’s going great and she says she’s glad to hear that, left it at that.

Thoughts on where her head is at? Thinking about reaching out but not looking to waste my time if it’s not even worth messaging her about setting something else up. Don’t worry, getting drinks with another chick tomorrow night

This easily stuck out to me. This chick is a time waster. You see what she did here?..

• Possibly confirmed another date with another guy so she came up with an excuse to vaguely and open endedly bail on you without it looking like a complete blow off or she just didnt feel like meeting up with you however that just translates into very low interest. i think it was the former though because on Friday's... chicks are always looking to do something.
• Secondly, by her saying "Another time for sure!"... this is a phony enthusiastic response to, once again, make it look like she didnt completely blow you off so the follow up to her flaking on you makes it seem not so bad, remember, Women when they reject or flake on a guy, they want it to be least confrontational as possible.
• "She hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked" .... Again.... smoothing out the last minute flaking she just pulled.

A Women who is genuinely interested in a guy WILL make/find a way to meet up with him. if this was the case, I see it playing out more like this...."Hey i'm sorry but I have to pick up my friends at the airport because their ride fell through. im sorry but can you make it out later on tonight?" This is a Woman who's really into you. She had to bail but immediately wants to see if you're available later that day/night. That's true interest.

This is why, not to get off topic, Men to be straight up direct and cut through a lot of bullsh*t Women like to pull. Women hate very direct bold Men because then it leaves no room for them to try to play games. Women love to build Mazes for Men to walk through and try to figure it all out in one big confusing obstacle. A Man who is so direct and bold says "Fvck the Maze, I'm going to bulldoze right through the middle", They hate this type of Man yet the pvssy get's soaked for him at the same time. Anyway, IMO... delete her contact and this is good you have another date, Forget this one and move forward. If she contacts you later on, you later let her know when/where to meet up and she will either agree or disagree but don't stay in that circus of vague confusion.

 

[dk1990S111]

This easily stuck out to me. This chick is a time waster. You see what she did here?..

• Possibly confirmed another date with another guy so she came up with an excuse to vaguely and open endedly bail on you without it looking like a complete blow off or she just didnt feel like meeting up with you however that just translates into very low interest. i think it was the former though because on Friday's... chicks are always looking to do something.
• Secondly, by her saying "Another time for sure!"... this is a phony enthusiastic response to, once again, make it look like she didnt completely blow you off so the follow up to her flaking on you makes it seem not so bad, remember, Women when they reject or flake on a guy, they want it to be least confrontational as possible.
• "She hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked" .... Again.... smoothing out the last minute flaking she just pulled.

A Women who is genuinely interested in a guy WILL make/find a way to meet up with him. if this was the case, I see it playing out more like this...."Hey i'm sorry but I have to pick up my friends at the airport because their ride fell through. im sorry but can you make it out later on tonight?" This is a Woman who's really into you. She had to bail but immediately wants to see if you're available later that day/night. That's true interest.

This is why, not to get off topic, Men to be straight up direct and cut through a lot of bullsh*t Women like to pull. Women hate very direct bold Men because then it leaves no room for them to try to play games. Women love to build Mazes for Men to walk through and try to figure it all out in one big confusing obstacle. A Man who is so direct and bold says "Fvck the Maze, I'm going to bulldoze right through the middle", They hate this type of Man yet the pvssy get's soaked for him at the same time. Anyway, IMO... delete her contact and this is good you have another date, Forget this one and move forward. If she contacts you later on, you later let her know when/where to meet up and she will either agree or disagree but don't stay in that circus of vague confusion.

Pretty much what I was thinking. No offer for another time so not worth hitting her up again. Other thing that I learned from so many posters here was to not waste time messaging and if they give any resistance to meeting up then it’s a waste of time lol that’s why I cut to the chase about going out. Worked good with this one I’m seeing later, but with the first one maybe should have taken a little more time messaging before asking her out. Few messages back and forth, get the number, then use that to set up the date. Will follow that now in the future

 

[Mazer]

Simple. No counteroffer. Next. Try again next week, anything but a yes is a no and ghost.

 

[nismo-4]

Second place is first loser.

Her ride from the airport didn't fall through. Chad, Tyrone, Enrique, Chang, Hiroshi, Richard, one of those motherf**kers hit her up. You were a "break glass in case of emergency date".

When you're not a top priority AKA someone who's not in first place, this happens. Anything other than a yes with the actions to dictate as such is a no, and warrants number deletion.

Be decisive motherf**ker. Be straight up. She'll either get soaked or run because she can't get you in some beta role.

#Modeone

 

[Georgepithyou]

A 9.5 on OLD? I'm finding that hard to believe, women like that don't need to go on OLD for attention.

 

[bat soup]

Match with a HB9.5 on hinge last Sunday. First few messages are an hour or two apart then she waits about 4 hours to respond. Next day I send her a couple messages and she’s responding pretty quickly so I cut to the chase and ask if she wants to grab coffee or drinks later in the week. She says “that would be nice!” So I tell her I’ll figure out my schedule tomorrow and we’ll sort out the details.

Had a pretty crazy day the next day so I tell her if the rest of the week is like that I’m leaning more towards drinks, she says she’s always down for liquid therapy and we plan on Friday. Friday around noon she says she’s gotta pick up friends from the airport because their ride fell through, very apologetic. Tell her no worries, another time and she responds with “another time for sure!” And that she hopes my day is going smoother than the last time we talked. Tell her it’s going great and she says she’s glad to hear that, left it at that.

Thoughts on where her head is at? Thinking about reaching out but not looking to waste my time if it’s not even worth messaging her about setting something else up. Don’t worry, getting drinks with another chick tomorrow night

She sounds like she's totally full of sheat and giving you bs excuses.

Have you ever cancelled a date at the last minute to pick up friends at the airport? I'd tell them to take a fcking taxi.