Caught feelings for a girl

[99Z0RN]

So I’ve been seeing this girl for about 2 months now, we have sex nearly every time we hang out and I’m starting to grow attached. She just got back from a week vacation yesterday and I noticed she updated her tinder page while she was away. I’m not ok with her banging other guys at this point, but I don’t know exactly how to go about telling her. Any advice?

 

[backseatjuan]

This is the beginning of the end of your relationship with her. If anything she should be thinking on how to manipulate you into relationship, not the other way around.

 

[99Z0RN]

So you guys saying I should break it off with her

 

[99Z0RN]

F*ck I hate feeling this way. Any idea’s why this might of happened? She must just view me as a f*ck buddy or maybe lost attraction at some point. She literally wanted to hang out the day before she left on her trip

 

[stovepipe]

F*ck I hate feeling this way. Any idea’s why this might of happened? She must just view me as a f*ck buddy or maybe lost attraction at some point. She literally wanted to hang out the day before she left on her trip

Sometimes one of the partners thinks what they have is more serious than it really is. It sure does sound like that is the case. If she just got back from a week vacation on top of updating her Tinder then the last thing you wanna do is act like a clingy beta buck.

If it were were me I would not reach out, let her come to you. Saying you don't want her to bang other dudes when you don't even seem to know how serious you 2 are shows it's more serious to you than it is her. Update your Tinder profile too and play ball!

 

[99Z0RN]

Sometimes one of the partners thinks what they have is more serious than it really is. It sure does sound like that is the case. If she just got back from a week vacation on top of updating her Tinder then the last thing you wanna is act like a clingy beta buck.

If it were were me I would not reach out, let her come to you. Saying you don't want her to bang other dudes when you don't even seem to know how serious you 2 are shows it's more serious to you than it is her. Update your Tinder profile too and play ball!

Clearly I have stronger feelings than she does. I went on a tinder date a couple days ago and got a kiss close but it doesn’t change how I feel. I kinda regret texting her this morning, you’re right I should let her come to me.

 

[AJ84]

Clearly I have stronger feelings than she does. I went on a tinder date a couple days ago and got a kiss close but it doesn’t change how I feel. I kinda regret texting her this morning, you’re right I should let her come to me.

Start creating some distance to try to reset your feelings before you do or say something that comes off as clingy. Your investment is the prize and it doesn’t look like she has earned that yet.

Dating other girls and doing your own thing will help with that.

 

[99Z0RN]

15 minutes after I update my tinder profile she texted me lol. I’m going to let it sit for a while, try to create some distance like you guys are saying.

 

[Smok1nAce]

Texting you "lol" like your supposed to know what that means. Any sane person would reply back with "what". She playing her game and your playing right back. You already lost. When women play games that last thing you should do is play them back, shows your just as weak minded as she is.

 

[99Z0RN]

no, you misunderstood me. She texted me this: “Wow, lucky you! Made it home last night, already back at work today ”

 

[Mazer]

You aren’t doing it for her or she doesn’t see you as long term. A woman who is interested in a future with you will not be updating her Tinder.
High interest women will delete their dating profile hoping you do the same. I have had plenty of “friends with benefits” all updated their Tinder photos, they were all sloots looking for new cawk and the other ones had low interest. I’m pretty sure their has been a few red flags from this woman that you have decided to turn a blind eye to as well. Go no contact because you are busy with other girls. Stop investing. Demote to fwb only

 

[Robert28]

It could be worse. You could get “let’s be friends” and no sex at all.

 

[RangerMIke]

The kiss of death for a 'relationship' is when a chick starts to believe YOU are the lucky one. Why? Because SHE wants to be the lucky one. You can not hide from her whats going on in your mind right now... chicks always know when you are hooked and reeled in. Fishing stops being fun when the fish is flopping around in the boat.

Now if you are a BIG fish... and you fight, and you are something to brag about, well that fish gets KEPT and displayed, she wants to brg to her friends... she doesn't what to hear from her friends "He's do lucky to have you." That is chick-speak for "you can do better." Next step ...... you get tossed back, or worst she fries you up... If you think you are feeling bad now... just wait until you are even more invested.

Before this thing even starts... this chick already thinks you are lucky to have her. You need to back off and find more options, you are too invested and have lost control of your emotions.

 

[zekko]

FFS, I see no reason to next this girl, unless you are just such a big pvssy that you think you can't control your emotions with her and she will ruin your life. She's not doing anything you're not doing. You're both on Tinder. She texted you the day after she got home. So you're taking it more seriously than she is right now, so what? That's a very common pattern, women tend to take longer to develop feelings than men do.

But you don't want to let her know you are taking it seriously. When a girl has not reached that point yet herself, and a guy rushes into it and gets all gushy, she can see it is as creepy and desperate and think you are a loser. I mean, she is wrong about that, because it is NORMAL for guys to catch feelings quickly, but women don't understand that and are not very forgiving about it.

So your role at this point, if you wish to continue seeing her, is to go out with her and have the most fun you can, and be the most charming man you can be, and not place any expectations on her at ALL. Go ahead and escalate sexually, of course, but as far as getting into a serious relationship or whatever, let her come to that place on her own, if it's going to happen. Six months down the line, if there's no progress, than she's probably just going to be a plate, and you will likely have to come to that realization. In the meantime, don't let your imagination run away with you.

 

[99Z0RN]

So, you guys are basically telling me to ghost her for now and find other women to go out with?

 

[fastlife]

That's on YOU. There's 2 scenarios that work out on your favor:

• You have the emotional control to detach emotionally and keep smashing while actively pursuing other girls.
• You drop her and pursue other girls.

Any scenario where you aren't pursuing other girls? Forget it bro. Don't catch feelings for girls you get off Tinder--that type of validation loop never goes away.

 

[stovepipe]

So, you guys are basically telling me to ghost her for now and find other women to go out with?

Ghost ride that broad and go on dates. If she updated her Tinder after a vacay then she had time to think about things. She might want to see what other options she has. Girl don't do that if she's truly diggin the man she's fuken. You attached feelings so if you continue to pursue her you will end up the one who will get hurt not her. If you're able to use her for sex then great, keep smashing as a plate!

It seems like you're feelings for her are at a point where it might be best to exit if you arent able to control your emtions. If you continue what you had without her being emotionally attached like you are, then your feelings for her will grow even more and her attraction for you will fade away. When you get to that point the pain would be a lot greater than just leaving now.

Whatever you do don't tell her how you really feel cause that could possibly be the nail in the coffin. Just remember to NEVER put both feet in the door, always keep one foot outside so you don't get emotionally crushed. Keep your frame strong and remember the golden rule to never be afraid of leaving someone you attached feelings to, even if it's your wife.

 

[99Z0RN]

Ghost ride that broad and go on dates. If she updated her Tinder after a vacay then she had time to think about things. She might want to see what other options she has. Girl don't do that if she's truly diggin the man she's fuken. You attached feelings so if you continue to pursue her you will end up the one who will get hurt not her. If you're able to use her for sex then great, keep smashing as a plate!

It seems like you're feelings for her are at a point where it might be best to exit if you arent able to control your emtions. If you continue what you had without her being emotionally attached like you are, then your feelings for her will grow even more and her attraction for you will fade away. When you get to that point the pain would be a lot greater than just leaving now.

Whatever you do don't tell her how you really feel cause that could possibly be the nail in the coffin. Just remember to NEVER put both feet in the door, always keep one foot outside so you don't get emotionally crushed. Keep your frame strong and remember the golden rule to never be afraid of leaving someone you attached feelings to, even if it's your wife.

She updated her profile to get laid on vacation. Put on there she was visiting Montreal, but that’s besides the point. I know I’d be able to f*ck her again, but you are right about my feelings. I don’t want to go any deeper down that rabbit hole if she’s not on the same page. I already have a few numbers off tinder and had a decent date a couple days ago, so I guess I’ll just ignore her for now

 

[stovepipe]

She updated her profile to get laid on vacation. Put on there she was visiting Montreal, but that’s besides the point. I know I’d be able to f*ck her again, but you are right about my feelings. I don’t want to go any deeper down that rabbit hole if she’s not on the same page. I already have a few numbers off tinder and had a decent date a couple days ago, so I guess I’ll just ignore her for now

Women who update their Tinder with vacation locations are the biggest sloots. You're aware of everything now. Just proceed with caution and only worry about what's best for you.

 

[99Z0RN]

Women who update their Tinder with vacation locations are the biggest sloots. You're aware of everything now. Just proceed with caution and only worry about what's best for you.

I should probably get myself checked I raw dogged her last time we hung out