Plate Has A Male Freind Stopping Over At Her House!

[Desdinova]

Do I let this chick know, she needs to DROP the male freinds living at her house.... Or just LEAVE things be as they are!

You can't turn a wh0re into a housewife. Just start fvcking other women and tell her that your female friends sleep in a different room.

You can't set boundaries on a chick who has no morals nor concepts when it comes to respecting the man she's with. If it bothers you too much, then ditch her because you can't fix her.

 

[marmel75]

Maybe she likes making a quick $500 a few times a year by banging this turd burger?

 

[Atom Smasher]

Is that picture a cropped selfie of those two together? It sure looks like it.

I smell a rat here. There’s more here than meets the eye. Personally, I’d be wondering where her mouth has been, and where the rest of her parts have been.

But she brought that suspicion on herself. What kind of woman who is vying for a LTR with a man does this kind of thing?

 

[Mazer]

Do you think this is her way of pressuring you into a relationship? I have had women who wanted to be exclusive, start telling me about all these male friends reaching out to her, hoping I’d say, let’s become exclusive before these dudes snatch you up. Crazy woman. I didn’t replace her, I just kept the status quo and ended up dropping her months later for a new plate. A bit of silence and distance until she corrects herself.

 

[Mazer]

Yeh man... biches are ruthless these days.. If she wants a LTR, then she best realise, dudes stopping over is NEVER acceptable.

She will either agree with me... or NEXT

True.
If you have to sit your woman down and tell her that having dudes staying at her house is unacceptable then you have already lost. I have had long term plates drop all orbiters and changed their social media profile pic to a photo of when they were a baby so guys wouldn’t be sending them messages. I didn’t even ask but they already knew it was the right thing to do if they want exclusivity.

 

[John9999]

True.
If you have to sit your woman down and tell her that having dudes staying at her house is unacceptable then you have already lost. I have had long term plates drop all orbiters and changed their social media profile pic to a photo of when they were a baby so guys wouldn’t be sending them messages. I didn’t even ask but they already knew it was the right thing to do if they want exclusivity.

I went out with this woman last year from like seven weeks. I nailed her on cheating. She had had two guys over to her house on separate occasions and slept with one of them.

Here’s the absolute crazy ass part. Although she knew that she was wrong she acted like it was no big deal and could we have a start over. I said hell no.

I remember asking her a question that I’ve asked many women when confronted with unacceptable behavior. I said how would you feel if I had two women over to my place and slept with one of them. She was speechless

 

[dustmuffin]

If she is a plate who cares what she does? Just f uck and ignore.

 

[zekko]

Just thinking out loud here:

As a plate, you really don't have anything to say about it.

As a potential LTR, you might let her know that this type of behavior doesn't help her case any. I think rather than starting out with the boundaries, I might start out asking her questions about how she feels about this sort of thing, if she thinks this sort of behavior would be appropriate in a LTR. You don't even have to commit to an opinion if you don't want to, but I usually speak my mind.

I wonder if she sent you that pic to show that he is not a threat to you.

Then there's Briffault's Law: The female, not the male, determines all the conditions of the animal family. Where the female can derive no benefit from association with the male, no such association takes place. I wonder what the benefit is for her hanging out with this guy?

I'm assuming she knows that you see other women, and probably knows (or strongly suspects) that you are sexually active with them?

 

[lamath]

Just thinking out loud here:

As a plate, you really don't have anything to say about it.

As a potential LTR, you might let her know that this type of behavior doesn't help her case any. I think rather than starting out with the boundaries, I might start out asking her questions about how she feels about this sort of thing, if she thinks this sort of behavior would be appropriate in a LTR. You don't even have to commit to an opinion if you don't want to, but I usually speak my mind.

I wonder if she sent you that pic to show that he is not a threat to you.

Then there's Briffault's Law: The female, not the male, determines all the conditions of the animal family. Where the female can derive no benefit from association with the male, no such association takes place. I wonder what the benefit is for her hanging out with this guy?

I'm assuming she knows that you see other women, and probably knows (or strongly suspects) that you are sexually active with them?

Good post

I think the law is talking about sex and mating. Not orbiters and attention givers.

 

[zekko]

I think the law is talking about sex and mating. Not orbiters and attention givers.

Well, I'm not sure what the intent is, but I think it applies in all cases. Attention givers give attention, for instance. An orbiter might buy her dinners. Women are notorious for having different guys to do different things for them. One guy might work on her car, another might fix her sink, another might take her dancing, another might buy her coffee, etc.

Since he is an EX business partner, obviously that shows the benefit she used to have with him. What's the benefit now? I think someone suggested above that she might be using him to try make soulforge jealous, or to convince him to commit. That's a possibility.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Well, I'm not sure what the intent is, but I think it applies in all cases. Attention givers give attention, for instance. An orbiter might buy her dinners. Women are notorious for having different guys to do different things for them. One guy might work on her car, another might fix her sink, another might take her dancing, another might buy her coffee, etc.

Since he is an EX business partner, obviously that shows the benefit she used to have with him. What's the benefit now? I think someone suggested above that she might be using him to try make soulforge jealous, or to convince him to commit. That's a possibility.

Allowing it means he should expect more of the same in a LTR. Training him.

 

[zekko]

Allowing it means he should expect more of the same in a LTR. Training him.

Well, I absolutely don't think he should allow it. Not if he plans to move toward an LTR anyway.
Better to hash it out now, so he knows what he's dealing with. If she is adamant about keeping male friends, he can cut her off and just keep her at plate status.

We used to debate these situations here all the time. Some say it's fine that they have male friends, others think it's risky behavior for LTRs. I happen to be in the latter group. Even is the guy is truly only a friend, this opens up the excuse for her to hang out with any guy she wants to, whenever she wants. All she has to do is say "He's just a friend". I know couples who operate like this, but like I said IMO it's a hazard. Might not bite you in the @ss for 10 years down the line, but it can always bite you.

 

[John9999]

Omg. This is getting way way over analyzed.

Simple solution. You be a freakin man and tell her this is not cool, period. You give an ultimatum, no other guys or no to you. No long talk, no negotiation.

The mere fact that this chick doesn’t get that is a major red flag.

Freakin man up!

 

[soulforge]

Is that picture a cropped selfie of those two together? It sure looks like it.

I smell a rat here. There’s more here than meets the eye. Personally, I’d be wondering where her mouth has been, and where the rest of her parts have been.

But she brought that suspicion on herself. What kind of woman who is vying for a LTR with a man does this kind of thing?

True.
If you have to sit your woman down and tell her that having dudes staying at her house is unacceptable then you have already lost. I have had long term plates drop all orbiters and changed their social media profile pic to a photo of when they were a baby so guys wouldn’t be sending them messages. I didn’t even ask but they already knew it was the right thing to do if they want exclusivity.

This is a vaild point in 1997... But which chick doesn't have male freinds these days?

She claims to have known this dude for twenty years or so.. Maybe she just wanted to be honest about it.

But I get your point.. That was a BRAZEN move by her, letting me know all this shyte.

Maybe she is preparing me to accept this kinda shyte... So I will have to give this a reality check today.

 

[soulforge]

Just thinking out loud here:

As a plate, you really don't have anything to say about it.

As a potential LTR, you might let her know that this type of behavior doesn't help her case any. I think rather than starting out with the boundaries, I might start out asking her questions about how she feels about this sort of thing, if she thinks this sort of behavior would be appropriate in a LTR. You don't even have to commit to an opinion if you don't want to, but I usually speak my mind.

I wonder if she sent you that pic to show that he is not a threat to you.

Then there's Briffault's Law: The female, not the male, determines all the conditions of the animal family. Where the female can derive no benefit from association with the male, no such association takes place. I wonder what the benefit is for her hanging out with this guy?

I'm assuming she knows that you see other women, and probably knows (or strongly suspects) that you are sexually active with them?

My guess is she sent the picture because she wanted me to know he is no threat.

However if I allow her to get away with this kinda shyte, further down the line other men could start making an appearance.

Just because a dude is ugly, doesn't necessarily mean a good looking chick won't bang him.

Some ugly mofos are happy playing the beta provider, maybe he is financialy well off.

She was pushing me to MEET this guy, when he is next over.. I am guessing she is wanting Approval from me.

 

[soulforge]

Well, I absolutely don't think he should allow it. Not if he plans to move toward an LTR anyway.
Better to hash it out now, so he knows what he's dealing with. If she is adamant about keeping male friends, he can cut her off and just keep her at plate status.

We used to debate these situations here all the time. Some say it's fine that they have male friends, others think it's risky behavior for LTRs. I happen to be in the latter group. Even is the guy is truly only a friend, this opens up the excuse for her to hang out with any guy she wants to, whenever she wants. All she has to do is say "He's just a friend". I know couples who operate like this, but like I said IMO it's a hazard. Might not bite you in the @ss for 10 years down the line, but it can always bite you.

Keeping male freinds is another matter..

But going out drinking with a male freind, then bringing him back to your house.. Thats a different ball game all together.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Any man who is “friends” with a woman, would jump her bones in a NY second if he could. And women know it.

This “friend” is serving her. At best he is affirming her and giving her an attention fix. At worst they are sexually involved. It is never appropriate as there is always an undercurrent of a game going on. The “boyfriend” is always the loser in the end.

Men and women really can’t be innocent friends. One always wants to have sexual relations with the other.

 

[Spaz]

She sent me a picture of him.... Holy Fvck.... He is one UGLY dude.

I don't think I need to worry about him banging her lol

Well she took that picture and had her face cropped out.

She's projecting to you through a series of events (or texts) and in turn manipulating ur perception, what you wrote in the above quote is seeded by her narratives.

Best you put on ur thinking hat otherwise you'd be promoted into a higher level within the White Knight order.

 

[backseatjuan]

That girl you posted about here and I find her online sex pics and online porn? I thought I told you who he probably is, the dude that has her porn posted online, I forgot two probable city names he is from. But most likely it is this dude and most likely is her weird sado maso bondage fantasy guy. Ask more photos of him with his face, I can guarantee you I'll find him online and he is somehow connected to porn, maybe a pronographer.

The CRAZY thing is.. She is pushing for a relationship with me.

I'm have the weirdest advice on this site about relationships. I suggest wiretapping her phone -- if you consider things seriously with her -- it's easy, just as easy as rooting android and installing an app. It gives you a 100% picture of what you dealing with, and gets rid of all secrets and unknowns.

I can take a guess and tell you that there is no such thing as friend, but I think you already know that, because she has red flags all over her.


edit...
@soulforge

Let's try my wanga mode. He is 39 years old? He is from Trumpton or Chigley?

 

[soulforge]

Any man who is “friends” with a woman, would jump her bones in a NY second if he could. And women know it.

This “friend” is serving her. At best he is affirming her and giving her an attention fix. At worst they are sexually involved. It is never appropriate as there is always an undercurrent of a game going on. The “boyfriend” is always the loser in the end.

Men and women really can’t be innocent friends. One always wants to have sexual relations with the other.

True I have never been comfortable with this idea of girls with male friends.. ESPECIALLY ones that sleep over at her house.

I think I will leave her strictly in the SMASH and move on category.

Something feels off... Especially with her being very keen for me to meet him.

Maybe she wants me to meet him, so I can give her the GREEN LIGHT so he can carry on seeing him.

Maybe she wants me to see, that he is of no threat.