Contradictions from Dating Coaches

[RangerMIke]

I believe advice depends on the end game. For example, are you only looking to bed the woman without any hope for an LTR? Or are you thinking this one might be an LTR candidate? IMO Different outcomes require different approaches.

I do agree... but you must make a move and try to bed her, then let her figure out what it all means. If you try and she isn't interested, she'll let you know and then you stop... back off and try again later, until she gives in willingly or you get tired of blue balls and move on.

If she wants a relationship, she will let you know then you can decide if you are willing to slip on the leash. Every rose has it's thorns... remember that commitments have consequences. Never let yourself get so enamored with a potential relationship to the point where you are willing to ignore potential pit-falls... because that is when you start ignoring sh!t you don't really like. That's when you sell your fishing boat which you LOVE, to buy a house you don't need because that is what she wants... abandon your friends to spend more time with her friends, that are NOT your friends... they are HER friends... then she starts dressing you in pink shirts, and makes you go to parties as a matching 'couple'... and the old you (Who BTW was the MAN she was attracted to in the first place) is gone... replaced by a Pod Person. Then down the road, when she no longer 'feels it' for you, you will wonder what the fvck happened! What happened is you changed into something she is no longer attracted too in a futile attempt to make an emotional butterfly happy.

 

[RangerMIke]

I'd say the faster you move the faster she has a chance to feel buyer's remorse. I am seeing this repeatedly as the slow moving guy(I have confidence in my value so I can afford to play the long game), watching women get with other guys on the rebound but then growing dissatisfied with them and coming to me(the other guys have no clue, they think it's fine). Actually it's kinda sad, it's like the second these guys truly internalize they got the girl they become so visibly happy online and in person... meanwhile they are complaining to me and getting jealous when I brag about other women. Ruthless game these women play.

At the same time, the game is so high velocity now that you have to move fast....hence how dysfunctional it has become.

Good point, I've given this some thought and I have lost out on women when I didn't move fast enough, but like you said sometimes they come back. If they don't 'no problem' there are other chicks. I really don't care about the women I've missed out on because they don't matter unless we are dating.

I went out on a first date with a woman last week, she's just come off an LTR and there are at least 2 other dudes after her.... one is putting on a full court press from what I can determine. I'll likely lose out to Mr Hare, but that's okay. You have to be okay with sh!t you can not control... I can't control the dysfunctional environment, or the chick. She knows Mr. Hare will bend over backwards to make her happy and she will use him until the toy no longer amuses her... or she marries him... then she can torture the fvck out of him. A vast majority of women I date I lose to other dudes... but there are always more women. And the ones who like you for who you are are a lot more fun then the chicks you have to twist yourself into a pretzel over.

 

[RangerMIke]

It's the general message that guys "shouldn't be needy". In other words, that guys shouldn't express proper value (IMO)

You can't help being needy... if we all have 'needs', having needs is the definition of needy. But you can control your behavior and recognize that your 'needs' can be met by any woman. Where guys have problems is when the lock onto a particular chick and they feel like they NEED HER. It's okay to want women, if you don't express your want for a woman, then you are not acting like a man. It's a subtle difference, but it makes all the difference in the world in your behavior.

There was a guy in this forum, I can't remember his name, but he described an interaction he had with his girlfriend who was mad at him and said "YOU aren't having s3x tonight!" His response to her was, "Yes I am... just not with you." and calmly walked out the door.

Now I'm not sure I would have handled it that way, but it is the correct mindset. Did he lose this chick... yeah probability, but she never would have tossed down the gauntlet in the first place if he hadn't given her some indication that he valued her more than his own wants.

 

[ubercat]

Other way too. Some of the random pvssy from my OLD days I m pretty sure was a revenge fuk from some higher SMV guy laughing at her demands. At the time it used to annoy me coz of course they would run back. But now looking back it kept my d1ck wet and free of desperation stink. It all helps and adds up. Thr other guy had worked her up do they were great animal fux. Then when HI Girls turned up I was pretty chill.

 

[spitfire]

It's foolish to accept advice from people who can't prove that their strategies work. If a guy claims to be a ladies man and he's surrounded by guys 24/7, he's a fraud.

Show me a single dating coach who is surrounded by hot women and he will be the first.

 

[GrowingPains]

baeeeees

 

[RangerMIke]

Value x Time from last Serious LTR x Aloofness = probability of success.

Completely agree. If a chick coming off a LTR is not attracted to a man that is expressing his interest while still giving her space, she is a crazy a$$ b!tch. And you do not want that drama.

I think where so many of these PUAs have it wrong is that they place all value in getting chicks.... They don't give a fvck if the chick is a bunny boiling lunatic, if you get you d!ck wet you win....

The DJ approach is sooooo much better long term because if a chick isn't chasing YOU, while you are demonstrating proper value, she is either too badly damaged to be any fun or she doesn't like you.

You only win if you end up with a SANE chick, who likes you, and who you are attracted too. That's it. If you manage to win in a battle and land a lunatic... it doesn't matter how 'hot' she is you lose because it takes time away from you finding a chick that is going to be more fun than work.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Completely agree. If a chick coming off a LTR is not attracted to a man that is expressing his interest while still giving her space, she is a crazy a$$ b!tch. And you do not want that drama.

I think where so many of these PUAs have it wrong is that they place all value in getting chicks.... They don't give a fvck if the chick is a bunny boiling lunatic, if you get you d!ck wet you win....

The DJ approach is sooooo much better long term because if a chick isn't chasing YOU, while you are demonstrating proper value, she is either too badly damaged to be any fun or she doesn't like you.

You only win if you end up with a SANE chick, who likes you, and who you are attracted too. That's it. If you manage to win in a battle and land a lunatic... it doesn't matter how 'hot' she is you lose because it takes time away from you finding a chick that is going to be more fun than work.

In theory. Maybe but the threads if any indication, i am not sold. Most threads have been about cratered SMV, hot 29yr old (is there anything closer to the wall?), single mom's, and low testosterone.

Another thread a guy was preaching monogamy for steady *****. Imagine, the sheer possibility of actually growing a pair and hitting on baeeees.

Another cuck preaching how easy is it to get models.

Neither of the guys has ever seen a vagina before lulz


IMHO (for what its worth), everyone has a opinion be ut red pill, pua, mgtow, mras etc but GROWN MEN DO GROWN MEN THINGS.
ACCUMULATE GEMS FROM A VARIETY OF DIFFERENT SOURCES AND APPLY IT.

I see the value in all of the above however, its ideal to adopt free thinking regardless of the ideology.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

It's foolish to accept advice from people who can't prove that their strategies work. If a guy claims to be a ladies man and he's surrounded by guys 24/7, he's a fraud.

Show me a single dating coach who is surrounded by hot women and he will be the first.

There's a lot but its social proof. Not indicative on crushing regularly. Attention *****s surround status males.

By the same token, adopting the philosophy, we should all buy Leonardo Dicaprio boot camps due to the volume of women he pulls some how ranging from 19-25 for the past two decades.

I can't figure out how come dating coaches don't sell the decaprio style of dating.

Wait wut?

 

[spitfire]

I actually was hanging out with a girl who had brought a dating coach along. This girl apparently needed or wanted coaching just to have a conversation. She was staring at me, deer in headlights. She stared at her coach.

"Talk to him." So the woman says a few words. I responded but then she didn't know what to do next.

"Be friendly. Smile." She was already smiling but she smiled a bit wider.

It was absolutely a pitiful situation. This "girl" must've been 30 years old. How do you make it to 30 without the ability to have a conversation or be friendly without a coach sitting by your side?

Lesson: whatever a dating coach coaches you to do, you know how to do already. You're just afraid to try.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I actually was hanging out with a girl who had brought a dating coach along. This girl apparently needed or wanted coaching just to have a conversation. She was staring at me, deer in headlights. She stared at her coach.

"Talk to him." So the woman says a few words. I responded but then she didn't know what to do next.

"Be friendly. Smile." She was already smiling but she smiled a bit wider.

It was absolutely a pitiful situation. This "girl" must've been 30 years old. How do you make it to 30 without the ability to have a conversation or be friendly without a coach sitting by your side?

Lesson: whatever a dating coach coaches you to do, you know how to do already. You're just afraid to try.

Female dating coaches are pitiful. Fraudin more times than not. I give rsd Sarah a chance but not holding my breathe.

Just cause a woman ****s Deantay Wilder doesn't mean I'll ask boxing advice from her.

The fact a woman is doing any sort of personal development and self reflection, i commend her given most women are lazy ****in slobs. Hence why most are bulking season after 23.

 

[malz1]

Nick, it's definitely important to test what works because of all the misinformation and fluff out there. There is some good info circulating for sure but they are just drops in a sea of bullcrap. And not all pain points are substantially addressed. The 'solutions' are often irrelevant to a misinterpreted problem and may lead to modeled approaches of overcomplexity creating new problems.

Unfortunately, those who've done the hypothesizing, collecting, testing, etc will probably not share their solution. Sure money is useful but it's actually reckless, imo, to equip your competitors with the insights needed to 'beat' you. Your continued bloodline depends on their ignorance and weaknesses. Money can be had elsewhere.

The search may be long but it's worth it. I often find myself rushing a make-out these days not because I'm clueless but instead from too much confidence with regard to knowing. By knowing the dynamics you will become that guy who just magically gets the girl, and people will watch in awe including her orbitors and bypassers. AMS and pua just isn't there yet imo so you're gonna have to think for yourself on some things. In the end, it'll come down to whatever works. The prize will be endless female affection and warmth. The feeling of embracing a female stranger after a short period of time never gets old.

 

[backseatjuan]

Send her this text right after you get her number or if she texts you first.

“Hey Sandra. I’ve been thinking about our conversation. I’ve decided that I want to try out your holes. When will you be free?”

Soery my iphone corrects me all the time, I meant to say you have a nice puppy!

 

[backseatjuan]

If you raise your ass above or aquire those see through btch goggles

You will realize all men are different. They are same and yet they are different. Because every man is 30% looks, 30% personality and charisma, 30% money, 10% other 10%. It’s bullsht man. Bottom line we all are different. Whoever you want to follow or imitate you are bound to come up with your own sht. Good sht that works for you.

This is what coaches give you. Sht that works for them.

What this means? I’m gonna give you same advice I gave the dude who introduced me to AMS. Follow it but realize you are not AMS.

By the way, great thanks to rick @RickTheToad for introducing me to AMS. At this point in my life, AMS is the sht for me. He is just like big bang was. I bet he is the result of collision of two big black holes. We’ll never know for sure.


By the way... it’s a P.S. had to come back and add. I do not follow him to a T. Whatever works for me and it’s always a new approach, it’s an ongoing development

Your question inabertently turns into confidence question)))