Why incels are a 'real and present threat'...

[Serenity]

You can’t tell anyone what will cause more women. I don’t know, maybe my English is bad.



Yes. This is my point. Your and Spaz’s steps and advice help with the progress. They don’t lead to it. It’s not a cause and effect issue.



My whole issue is with the word “cause.” If you say it “help with the progress” or “it will lead” or “improve chances.” I 100% agree.

The fvck are you talking about?! You started using the word "cause" on me, I didn't use that word before you used it when arguing against me.

You're arguing semantics rather than trying to discuss the point. But if saying "help with the progress", "lead to progress" or "improve chances" will help me get the fvcking point across then sure, call it whatever, I don't care. It's autisitic sh!t like this that will not help with the progress.

So we agree then, k thx bye.

 

[Chi Town]

But it’s definitely not easy. An IDGAF attitude is not even enough IME. I still get nervous even around women that I honestly want nothing from..

If you still get nervous then you don't have a IDGAF attitude so you can't say it's not enough.....

 

[guru1000]

What does one thing have to do with another? I think I once lost $20,000 in 90 min. That was a fun day.

Show me where to meet girls in 20s who dont have 6’1 boyfriends and I’ll crush them. It’s always the older ones who are atttacted. They usually want to marry. Then I say sign a prenup and they say go to hell.

Brutal.

We're close in age and do well. What do you think is the material difference between your results and my own with women in their 20s?

Can't be height, as I know plenty of shorter men, most of whom do well.

Now ... you tell me.

 

[Ranger]

Marry? Are you trying to find a woman to marry?
Is that your end game?

 

[Mike32ct]

If you still get nervous then you don't have a IDGAF attitude so you can't say it's not enough.....

My only point was that the nervousness happens even when I’m talking to someone I genuinely don’t even want/like/care about/need anything from. That’s all.

But I just go with it. It is what it is lol.

 

[Trump]

We're close in age and do well. What do you think is the material difference between your results and my own with women in their 20s?

Can't be height, as I know plenty of shorter men, most of whom do well.

Now ... you tell me.

1. No leadership
2. Take disrespect

 

[guru1000]

1. No leadership
2. Take disrespect

These are traits important in keeping them. What about attracting them? Are you attracting these 20s women to go on dates with?

 

[Trump]

Are you attracting these 20s women to go on dates with?

Nope. Where to find them? Even if you can the young attractive ones are usually someone’s wife.

 

[Chi Town]

It's all about how you carry yourself OP,
That's all......

 

[Spaz]

Nope. Where to find them? Even if you can the young attractive ones are usually someone’s wife.

Allow Guru to assist you.

Get down to the root cause and work from there.

Be willing to listen and be willing to have an open mind Trump.

Remember that those people who are currently engaging with you is because we believe in you when no one else does.

 

[corrector]

The point is to eliminate their beauty from the equation and just communicate with them no differently that you would with anyone else. You completely remove the goal of trying to attract them at all. Start off with removing the goal of getting their number, the date, etc. Seek nothing at all but a very brief and friendly conversation in passing, even if it’s just a “hey how are you” and nothing else. Let it end naturally at anytime. Seek nothing.

Does it matter how many times you do this? Is doing this to one women a month okay, or would you say a week or a day, etc...? How frequently?

Continuously exposing yourself to attractive women in this manner does 2 things in particular.

1. It shows you are simply being sociable with no endgame in mind.

2. It shows you are not shaken or intimidated by merely a pretty face.

You "expose" yourself, as per your definition, by approaching a random woman (i.e. or whom you want to approach that you would consider to be attractive to you), and ask them "how they are doing, or how their day is going" as a minimal approach strategy and pat yourself in the back if you are able to accomplish this? Maybe it will make your day if she responds favorably? Never worry about her phone number or if she has a boyfriend/is married off the bat.

These two impressions will often guide a woman’s reaction to you. If a woman senses both of these things from you, she will more likely respond positively, friendly, etc.

That’s a feeling a man must strive to get used to. It will go a long way to ease those female specific anxieties. And as I said earlier, once a man can achieve that frame, he can then begin to experiment with injecting a little game into the same comfortable process.

Okay so once a certain comfort level is achieved by an unspecified amount of approaches, or reinforced approaches (i.e. multiple approaches and interactions with the same women over time), then you would push the envelope and take more social risks within the interaction itself. If you don't have the desired comfort level to take a social risk then don't take it.

 

[corrector]

Agree completely. A FIRST step is becoming very chill or unaffected around attractive women*.

But it’s definitely not easy. An IDGAF attitude is not even enough IME. I still get nervous even around women that I honestly want nothing from. But I’ll keep working at it.

*I mean being really comfortable, even if it results in friendzone. Actually being attractive to attractive women is an entirely different discussion.

Would you consider yourself incel because you still get nervous around women, including those that you don't want anything from?

 

[corrector]

The same guy that would be a in incel in london wouldnt be one in minsk even tough the guy clearly has problems overall.

I live in Toronto, Canada, so I guess this would be a strong issue because I think here is worst than London. I sometimes feel if I was in a Latin American country like Brazil, Colombia, etc... or some other part of the world, it would be more difficult not to end up with a girlfriend (i.e. unless you really were gay or something) then for it feeling more fantasy-like and out of reach to get one here.

 

[Mike32ct]

Would you consider yourself incel because you still get nervous around women, including those that you don't want anything from?

Great question. No I don’t. I’ve had some limited success with women over the years, but it’s been sporadic. So I’m definitely no longer an incel, but not a textbook “normie*” either.

*A normie is pretty much a normal, average looking guy or regular joe that has regular girlfriends and LTRs from social circles without really trying that hard. (I’m sure you know this term. I defined it for the others.)

 

[sangheilios]

I haven't gone through every post on this thread, but I also used to be an INCEL.

8th grade I had moved to a new town and was immediately cast out by the rest of my peers, literally didn't have a single friend or get any attention from women all throughout high school. At home I also dealt with a lot of emotional abuse, being put down and criticized for every single thing.....so you can imagine how low my self esteem was. Due to some traumatic experiences I had in my late teens and early twenties it took me a very long time to gain any sort of confidence. I didn't go on my first date until I was 27, almost 2 years ago, and was severely stunted in that regard. I had a few tough experiences that taught me a lot very quickly but what made it easier for me was getting a really good group of guy friends, overall solid individuals with good social skills, likable, etc. These guys didn't come into my life until about a year ago, so prior to them I was making progress on my own but at a much slower rate.

For me this was mostly psychological and due to circumstance, I'm sure that if I had the friends I had years ago I would have developed much sooner.

 

[evan12]

If there was a group of ugly, hairy, green haired feminazies with sh*t attitudes towards men, going around shooting up people because attractive guys won’t f**k them do you think it’s society’s responsibility to find them hot guys to f**k?

Are ugly, hairy, green haired feminazies with sh*t attitudes towards men deserving of men?

People create the reality that they live in. If they want a different reality the change starts with them. The world isn’t going to bend over backwards to accommodate their sense of entitlement.

That’s life.

Yes, any negative thing appear from women there are tens of studies get started to see the causes and how to treat it . while nobody want to understand what is incels problem is , I have read many articles ,and all of them want to stress one point "These incels are misogynists"

 

[evan12]

I live in Toronto, Canada, so I guess this would be a strong issue because I think here is worst than London. I sometimes feel if I was in a Latin American country like Brazil, Colombia, etc... or some other part of the world, it would be more difficult not to end up with a girlfriend (i.e. unless you really were gay or something) then for it feeling more fantasy-like and out of reach to get one here.

Canadian women hate men in the way that is hard to explain, they want to tear down the man in every chance they get. They hate the fact that they are women, and everytime they look at a man they get angry because they are women.

 

[corrector]

Every opportunity that arises.

From the rest of your post, you are defining an opportunity as any "attractive" (i.e. one where there is an emotional stake involved on some level) woman that is in the vicinity. Therefore, if you are at home, no opportunity. If you are at the Gym and there is no-one next to you, or you choose an equipment by yourself, then not in vicinity and no opportunity. You don't have to proactively place yourself in the vicinity of any woman.

No. You don’t “approach”. You just acknowledge them when they are in your vicinity. In a line. Sitting next to you. Whatever. Everyday situations. If you have to “approach” to talk to an attractive women, you’ve been hiding from them in plain sight.

Well that's easy because its very rare for any woman to be in my vicinity. So theoretically, if a woman is in my vicinity once a month or other month, then there is only an opportunity once every other month. Honestly, I rarely see an attractive woman that is around, and if they are, they are plugged into their smartphone and texting away or with someone else. Guess that puts me off the hook then?

No. The point is to realize just how rare it is for an attractive women to crush a man just for being sociable.

Or how rare it is to meet an attractive women in your vicinity in the first place.

No. Why would you? There’s no sexual agenda here, remember?

But if the interaction goes too well, then you'll feel you missed out on a sexual opportunity if your limit your goals to just having a fun interaction without any prospect of follow-up. That feels worst to me then doing nothing at all in the first place, at least there is no sense of loss.

You’re trying to figure this out like it’s a riddle, a tactic, a textbook procedure... Don’t overthink it.

I might be wired that way and can't help it. You have four personality types. Suppose it is native that I'm an analytic personality type? It's not that I'm trying to figure anything out, it's is how I'm wired.

It’s just a feeling. It’s about establishing comfort with basic communication before anything else.

Do you really think any man with these kinds of social anxieties can simply melt away the fear and win the day to get the cheerleader just because he has a magical pickup line?

I'm not looking to win the cheerleader or have unreasonable expectations. You think you are talking to bigdave17?

You don’t need lines and methods. No one does.

You need comfort first, as a foundation, above everything else. Only once you have that can you truly proceed and progress with communication that can parlay sexual connotations, which will lead to getting the number, the date, etc.

So how do you get women in your vicinity, more frequently than once in a blue moon, so you can build comfort? Lets assume you are not looking that hot that women are flocking to be in your vicinity, then what?

Of course, I now have to explicitly say this alone isn’t enough for men with many issues. This is just one process for one problem. But it is a major fundamental and necessary to tackle.

Well, I think you have an answer. If there are plenty of women in your vicinity, and you feel comfortable talking to women in your vicinity then eventually you will reach a level where closing is a natural extension that flows from basic communication. The catch-22 though is there has to be women in your vicinity for that to work. Is that realistic in a digital age where everyone is plugged into a smartphone and swiping Tinder though?

 

[corrector]

I guess nobody fvcks in Canada.

Not exactly, if I wanted to do that then with as little as $ 60 and a phone call and a drive somewhere that could be handled. One thing here is prostitution laws are 100% not enforced unless the girls are minors or involved in sex traffic and are doing so involuntary. That's not the problem.

Just the other day I saw this couple in the Supermarket. I saw the girl tell this burly guy to wait while she checks the frozen items. I kid you not. The guy just stood there and obeyed her and I looked at him like he was a spectacle that was pvssy whipped by that girl. It was a white girl, but the way she looked, I'd say she's like a 5 in the hb scale. I have a cousin who is married to a Filipino lady who bosses him around, takes his money and threatens to call the police on him and lie about domestic abuse if he gets out of line (i.e. she even makes fake cuts on herself). It's not just about getting involved with someone, but it's also if it has to be in a way that you are pvssy whipped, then it starts looking ugly.

Dont know if nobody fvcks in Canada, but certainly people do get fvcked here, and not in a desirable way.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

After they got their advanced degrees, which is easy when you aren't distracted by women lol.

Lol. So many talents are possible when not paying into the distraction