Caught girlfriend cheating just now.

Spaz

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It means u r being dismissed or has been dismissed but you're yet to realise it and she doesn't want much of a drama.
 

niceguytoalphamale

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@Spaz then why hasn't she broken up with me? Why did her best friend add me? Why does she still have me on messenger? I think she wants to keep me but cheat aswel
 

Spaz

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When a woman decides to block me on FB or any social platform then I'd take it as she wanting to be dismissed by me.

That's how I operate. I will dismiss her regardless of her excuses or reasons (unless it's a genuine mistake and she added me back plus calls me up with an apology - even then I'll make her wait a few days before accepting, let her grovel a bit more).

See the difference in our mind frames ?
 

Atom Smasher

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Going ghost marginalizes her. That's why it's such a powerful tool. When a girl disrespects you as much as she has, she deserves to be marginalized. After all, isn't her behavior marginalizing YOU?

Going ghost results in turmoil for her. Confronting her results in closure for her, as she rationalizes, "Oh, I was right to cheat on him. He's always so angry" or something similar.
 

sazc

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Her best friend added you so that she, and your ex, could keep tabs on you.

I would't block them. Just unfriend all of them and go NC.
 
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A

AJ84

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Forgetting about her and moving on is the best revenge/ way to deal.

Playing some game to try to get her to feel bad or regret, etc is a waste of your time and energy. If she cared what the hell you thought and how you felt she would not have cheated, so making a point of dismissing her means nothing (she’s already dismissed you as Spaz said) and only serves to self soothe you, thinking that she is in turmoil over your ‘dismissal’. She blocked you on FB, she’s not texting, she’s not calling, don’t wait for closure from her, her lack of contact is closure.

Wipe yourself off and move on with your life.
 

SpanishFly

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She was branch swinging to another guy. It isn't working out as good as she hoped, so she's keeping you on the scene as her fallback plan. Forget her. Literally. And don't waste your energy on bitterness or revenge.
 

Billtx49

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Cheating = Her complete lack of commitment to you, whatever the relationship status is. That’s as simple as it is.…
 
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ThinkerG

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This will all backfire on you mark my words. Take it from me, I’ve made so many bad decisions, Handled situations in properly, and was just down right dumb. You learn though. Your age speaks for itself and that’s ok, we all learn as we go. You don’t sound mature at all and all this sounds like a high school dilemma. Facebook, her friend adding you, you trying to reason why..is the for real? Never do anything just to mess with someone’s head or get revenge. You don’t “owe” her a reason, you don’t “Have” to put up with her and you don’t “have” to be mr nice guy..you don’t have to do sh!t but End it properly, for you sake and hers. It’s about what is morally sound to you. For me, I wouldn’t WANT to leave someone in the dark like this especially with the “evidence” you have. Even if you are hurt..who just ghosts someone? I could see if it was just a short fling but if not you’ll regret it. Be a man, handle the situation, talk to her, follow your gut and make a decision. Even if you talk to her, no one says you have to stay with her. Also the poem thing is probably the worst childish tactic I’ve heard in a while. If you don’t handle this properly it’s gonna resurface and you’ll be back to square one emotionally. Good luck.
 
R

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There’s is winning here. OP looses.
Trying to get the top hand in a woman’s psychological warfare game is folly. He’s already lost, no matter what happens or develops.

He is enamored with her and can’t disconnect. He has to go all the way to the bottom of misery and even then he will pine for her.
Someone play taps.
 

Sunnypoo

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@mrgoodstuff I do not need to cheat. I'm not insecure and I don't have low self esteem, if I'm not happy I'll end the relationship. I would never replace someone or cheat before the relationship is finished, I'm a man not a coward. Unfortunately for her it's.....
Pump the brakes! Revenge cheating is not cowardice! It's probably the best form of punishment one can dole out to a cheater. I did it then kicked her to the curb. She couldn't believe what happened and it ****ed her up Good. The thing is if you do it you have to ensure it will be swift and certain and you'll have to be purposely sloppy so as to "get caught". It's hysterical to watch it play out and have them get all angry that you did such a thing to them .
 

Sunnypoo

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This will all backfire on you mark my words. Take it from me, I’ve made so many bad decisions, Handled situations in properly, and was just down right dumb. You learn though. Your age speaks for itself and that’s ok, we all learn as we go. You don’t sound mature at all and all this sounds like a high school dilemma. Facebook, her friend adding you, you trying to reason why..is the for real? Never do anything just to mess with someone’s head or get revenge. You don’t “owe” her a reason, you don’t “Have” to put up with her and you don’t “have” to be mr nice guy..you don’t have to do sh!t but End it properly, for you sake and hers. It’s about what is morally sound to you. For me, I wouldn’t WANT to leave someone in the dark like this especially with the “evidence” you have. Even if you are hurt..who just ghosts someone? I could see if it was just a short fling but if not you’ll regret it. Be a man, handle the situation, talk to her, follow your gut and make a decision. Even if you talk to her, no one says you have to stay with her. Also the poem thing is probably the worst childish tactic I’ve heard in a while. If you don’t handle this properly it’s gonna resurface and you’ll be back to square one emotionally. Good luck.
Eh, some people deserve a good ass kicking before you kick them to the curb. If you can't have their respect then take their fear.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Pump the brakes! Revenge cheating is not cowardice! It's probably the best form of punishment one can dole out to a cheater. I did it then kicked her to the curb. She couldn't believe what happened and it ****ed her up Good. The thing is if you do it you have to ensure it will be swift and certain and you'll have to be purposely sloppy so as to "get caught". It's hysterical to watch it play out and have them get all angry that you did such a thing to them .
If we liked someone we can educate them in that way. I too feel its a form of communication.
 
A

AJ84

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Eh, some people deserve a good ass kicking before you kick them to the curb. If you can't have their respect then take their fear.
I understand the desire to do something like that, and it might make them mad, but usually, ends up: 1) justifying to the other person why they treated you as they did and 2) confirming to the other person why you are a waste of their time and why they are better off without you.

Revenge in that context is self soothing, that’s it. Think about it. If a you did a girl wrong and she went and slept with your best friend as revenge, are you going to think, “Wow, I made a mistake. She really taught me a lesson. I should of been nicer to her, my loss.”

No lol.

I really do feel that, for growth and mental well being to simply move on with your life and not waste a minute of your time and energy on someone who doesn’t care about your feelings anyway. They don’t deserve your emotions.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I understand the desire to do something like that, and it might make them mad, but usually, ends up: 1) justifying to the other person why they treated you as they did and 2) confirming to the other person why you are a waste of their time and why they are better off without you.

Revenge in that context is self soothing, that’s it. Think about it. If a you did a girl wrong and she went and slept with your best friend as revenge, are you going to think, “Wow, I made a mistake. She really taught me a lesson. I should of been nicer to her, my loss.”

No lol.

I really do feel that, for growth and mental well being to simply move on with your life and not waste a minute of your time and energy on someone who doesn’t care about your feelings anyway. They don’t deserve your emotions.
IMHO its just a consequence. If gf stole from his bank account and he pressed charges and saw it thru to justice thats a consequence. Its the same as providing some pain or to stop supporting someone that hurt you badly.

It shouldnt be done as "revenge" but if you want to enact a consequence great.

And in the black magic world of "power" getting cheated on and complaining but staying gives her empowerment at expense of your pain and degredation. Cheaters need to be cheated on. Often they have no clue until its done to them. So we spank our children or we punish and we still love them. So do whatever you choose to do. Just dont do it as "revenge"
 
R

Ranger

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I understand the desire to do something like that, and it might make them mad, but usually, ends up: 1) justifying to the other person why they treated you as they did and 2) confirming to the other person why you are a waste of their time and why they are better off without you.

Revenge in that context is self soothing, that’s it. Think about it. If a you did a girl wrong and she went and slept with your best friend as revenge, are you going to think, “Wow, I made a mistake. She really taught me a lesson. I should of been nicer to her, my loss.”

No lol.

I really do feel that, for growth and mental well being to simply move on with your life and not waste a minute of your time and energy on someone who doesn’t care about your feelings anyway. They don’t deserve your emotions.
I posted this once before somewhere and I do agree with you on a point in this comment AJ.

When my ex cheated it was the end of a slow degrade that as a man I tried to avert. But to no avail. At first I was sad, then angry. I went out and fukked a string of women. Up to about eight maybe. It wasn’t hard. If fact it was rather easy. No hog heads either.

Looking back it really isn’t a good decision if you want to “get even” with someone. It felt amazing at the time but it lacked something of course. No real connection. I decided that I wanted the connection. Otherwise it’s just sex. That’s easy to get.

I don’t know what effect it had on her. I never asked. But I personally don’t recommend it if you are holding a grudge. It kinda messes you you. It sets in stone the precepts and ideas that will hinder a man later. This is the man who is bitter. Because it won’t heal until you find the man inside.
Comments, ideas, reading different things, all contribute to it. If you want yourself back...be careful of what you start to believe. Chances are it’s just your hurt little pvssy inside.

Now I don’t feel anything when I think of her. She is a non person in my life. Zero emotion. Not out of anger or hurt but because my ignorance caused it in many ways. Still, she is responsible for those she sleeps with.
 
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