A Plate - Spaz version.

[guru1000]

The tab was over $500.

So is there a dollar limit in expensive/ not expensive? Plate/not a plate?

I had a similar discussion in other threads.

Action matters little. Intent matters.

If you are doing a $500 dinner because thats what YOU like to do, then perfectly acceptable.

If you are buying a $500 dinner to pander and buy her affections, then not a fruitful endeavor.

Intent.

That's why instructing newbies on what to do in most instances is not constructive without redressing their intent behind the acts.

 

[Ranger]

I had a similar discussion in other threads.

Action matters little. Intent matters.

If you are doing a $500 dinner because thats what YOU like to do, then perfectly acceptable.

If you are buying a $500 dinner to pander and buy her affections, then not a fruitful endeavor.

Intent.

That's why instructing newbies on what to do in most instances in not constructive without redressing their intent behind the acts.

That’s what I was communicating, or trying to.

 

[Ranger]

$500 is relatively average in an upscale restaurant.

Eating exotic food can go up to $25,000

Lol I will just arrow the monkey and cook it myself.

 

[Spaz]

I wouldn’t spend five hundred for a dinner. Would you spend 2,000.00? I only make about 150,000.00 and keep it tied up.
I think it would be relative. Of course you know that there’s a difference between doing it to buy her affections and just dinner because you want her to be there.

Theres no problem if you decided to have some really expensive dinner and ask a woman to join you for dinner.

It's becomes a problem when you decided to splurge on her and turn it into a gift like a good beta orbiter.

 

[Spaz]

I had a similar discussion in other threads.

Action matters little. Intent matters.

If you are doing a $500 dinner because thats what YOU like to do, then perfectly acceptable.

If you are buying a $500 dinner to pander and buy her affections, then not a fruitful endeavor.

Intent.

That's why instructing newbies on what to do in most instances is not constructive without redressing their intent behind the acts.

Exactly.

 

[Spaz]

Lol I will just arrow the monkey and cook it myself.

Some of the Chinese cuisine is extremely expensive.

Don't be surprised to hear some men enjoying monkey brains.

 

[Spaz]

I agree. This is why I think sitting here splitting hairs is largely irrelevant, though I can certainly understand the point the OP is making, particularly with newbies.

Some men can do things other men shouldn’t.

Food should never be a problem but I get your meaning.

 

[Ranger]

Some of the Chinese cuisine is extremely expensive.

Don't be surprised to hear some men enjoying monkey brains.

Already have had it. It was ok. Nothing to write home to mom about. I like them room temperature better than chilled. To waxy tasting.
Prefer Balut.

 

[Spaz]

My outlook would define that as a FWB. Just my take.

Yes she would be deemed a FWB.

 

[Ranger]

Yes she would be deemed a FWB.

So how much trouble have you had with the plates discovering each other?
I’m not concerned about it, but how do you handle it other than just dismissing one that can’t handle it?

 

[Spaz]

So how much trouble have you had with the plates discovering each other?
I’m not concerned about it, but how do you handle it other than just dismissing one that can’t handle it?

I don't have problems with plates finding out about other plates - they become competitive (I edited this part to properly answer you).

If I was the one initiating for example texts messages and seducing her within her sphere (the game) then there might be drama's involved as it's her game - her frame.

In my case it's the opposite, they approach me and you're noticed I get invited by women regularly. Then it's my game and my rules - the power shifts towards me. They willingly enter my frame.

Both are "game" just different frames.

One is getting admirers via seduction.

Another is getting admirers via presence.

 

[Ranger]

I'm not concerned at all.

If I was the one initiating for example texts messages and seducing her within her sphere (the game) then there might be drama's involved as it's her game - her frame.

In my case it's the opposite, they approach me and you're noticed I get invited by women regularly. Then it's my game and my rules - the power shifts towards me. They willingly enter my frame.

Both are "game" just different frames.

One is getting admirers via seduction.

Another is getting admirers via presence.

I get it. Not worried or concerned.

 

[Spaz]

I get it. Not worried or concerned.

Refer to my edited post above Ranger.

 

[Ranger]

There is a stark contrast there. Very much so. Every really fun experience I’ve had has come from getting admirers via presence.
Trying to seduce women into liking me is very shaky ground in my experience. It’s the wrong model for me. I can approach and talk to them just fine but I’m not really interested in trying to convince them to like me or feel something for me. I think I would rather go write or go to a shooting match.

 

[AJ84]

I will add that if at any time she starts giving you the run around about hooking up and being busy........She is no longer a plate

I agree with your post. There are guys that say "I have 5 plates" when essentially they are not fvcking them, they are initiating ALL communication and in fact they are the ORBITER and she is not their PLATE.

Until you are sexually involved with a woman, she has really not invested anything into you. That is the real difference.

There should be no vacations for plates. You should not be meeting her family. You should not be going to expensive dinners with her. Or big events.

Plate = a woman who is investing in you but you are not investing in her (yet). She sees romance and relationship and you see her on a trial period or even just a chick to smash on occasion.

I know women who date but don’t invest (yet). They are feeling him out for potential but not getting too close and keeping their options open. That’s still a plate right?

 

[Ranger]

I know women who date but don’t invest (yet). They are feeling him out for potential but not getting too close and keeping their options open. That’s still a plate right?

If there’s sex involved then yes. If not they are just hopeful orbiters.

 

[AJ84]

If there’s sex involved then yes.

Ok that’s what I was thinking too. Sex seems to be the common dominator in what defines a plate. Makes sense.

I noticed that many of the single friends I have seem to follow his lead. So if he’s keeping it causal she will too, rather than scare the crap out of him by asking where he sees things going with them lol.

They keep their options open, hearts closed, until there’s some sign that they’re more than a plate (they don’t know that term though). Signs like being introduced to his family etc.

Not sure if that’s a good thing but they don’t want to get their hearts broken or waste valuable fertility years being a plate.

Then there’s my friend who doesn’t want anything more than causal, period.

 

[Roober]

Isnt this defined in Rollo's book, or the DJ bible, or somewhere else? I cant remember where I read it.

The concept is simple and derived from the acrobatic circus act of plate spinning. The relationship spinning women is in parentheses.

An acrobat (the don juan) uses balance, concentration and skill (game) to spin a single flat object, usually a plate, (women they are fvcking) atop a stick (tools for game) for a period of time. As the acrobat gains experience, they are able to spin several plates (many women) at one time, and spin them for longer periods of time. The acrobat understands that plates may fall and break (dismissal usually within the mans control, or distance by the woman), but that he can always put a new plate in its place (lessons from previous women).

The nuances and strict definitions are completely subjective, therefore you guys are spinning your wheels trying to argue them. However, there are some things to consider...

1. if an acrobat is only spinning one plate, is it really still an act or something more? Watching an acrobat spin a single playe would be boring? The act of continuous plate spinning typically doesn't favor one, because it's likely that the others will fall. And that's okay if that is your goal. If an LTR is your goal, which most here are pursuing no matter how much they deny it, then the other plates will eventually fall.

2. When plates fall, they dont always break. Some are much more durable and far less replaceable than the cheap flimsy ones you get at the dollar store.

 

[Ranger]

Ok that’s what I was thinking too. Sex seems to be the common dominator in what defines a plate. Makes sense.

I noticed that many of the single friends I have seem to follow his lead. So if he’s keeping it causal she will too, rather than scare the crap out of him by asking where he sees things going with them lol.

They keep their options open, hearts closed, until there’s some sign that they’re more than a plate (they don’t know that term though). Signs like being introduced to his family etc.

Not sure if that’s a good thing but they don’t want to get their hearts broken or waste valuable fertility years being a plate.

Then there’s my friend who doesn’t want anything more than causal, period.

Understood. She will generally be trying on (sex) with the different prospects. I’m sure that’s not always true, but generally so.

Women are master plate spinners. Men as a rule are really gullible enough to think she’s only seeing him (only sex with him). I even know one guy who actually proposed to a young woman who proceeded to tell him that she had not agreed to exclusivity, nor had it ever come up during their times together. Quite the blow to him. Talk about a slap of reality. Lol

 

[Murk]

I agree with the OP but disagree about emotions. I’m an emotional guy and if she’s a good 7 or above with a good personality I can chill with emotions get involved.

Sophie I’ve been banging since February 2018, Lord knows how I’ve managed to dangle her this long but she knows the deal, we both see other people, she knows I been banging Sara my room mate and hates her but still came over the day I landed from Miami and fvcked in Sara’s bed (don’t ask me why).

18 year old at work, Yasmin, catching major feels, hates that I’m not committing to her, seen the hoes I have on my Snapchat but still wants to continue banging. I care for her as a person and like an older brother, she’s young and I’ll drop this soon as it’s not fair on her.

Amelia, picked her up in December and bumped into her again NYE at a rave, she came back to mine and stayed for a day, about to meet her tonight and go back to her place.

Kim, got tired of being a plate, gave me the ultimatum and I let her go, we banged a couple times since then too. I went to school with her older sister, her mother has cancer which I can relate to and I’ve always been there to support her. Still always a plate though.

Sara, friend and we both caught feels, she’s back tomorrow and wants to “talk about my behaviour” when she’s back tomorrow, not seen her in 3 weeks, I have feels for her. Will not commit and we both been seeing others since we met two years ago.

Irena/selina/Kirsty - all prospects who are one meeting away from getting the D and will arrange this month, maybe next because it’s hard work.

I’ll happily get feelings for them all, but I’ll never commit to them (possibly one of the prospects), why can’t you have feelings for a plate? I smashed 22 chicks last year and had feelings for at least 9 of them and never committed or got heart broken over any of them.

To top it all off I had a conversation with my ex on NYE at the same rave I met Amelia, first real convo we had since breaking up in jan 2018, she said I look good and was dressed smart (blazer and pocket square, normal) I told her I live with a girl now and her heart sank, I nearly got erect from the feeling of crushing her. She wrapped up the convo and we never spoke again, she looked like sh1t and was with a bunch of low level weirdos.

I have my sight set on finding a bad B in Miami. A Colombian, I’ll move there in 10 years to settle down.