Success Journal - LTR and Family as the goal

[BeTheChange]

I am a firm believer in accountability; that people pretty much get what they deserve in life.

You are responsible for your outcomes, your successes and your failures. Don’t blame the market or social media, or the pill, or slvt culture or feminism. Good women, at least how most people in society choose to define them, have always been rare. Don’t believe me? Go and read Proverbs, written almost 3000 years ago.

Proverbs 31:10
An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.

Proverbs 18:22
He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the LORD.

Proverbs 19:14
House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the LORD.


And on the flipside....


Proverbs 5:3
For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword

Proverbs 6:25
Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread


For more modern red pill stuff go and read Hemingway, Bukowski, Fitzgerald, Dostoevsky, D1ckens, Hardy, etc. Most women, throughout history have always, by and large, been selfish and unruly. Many men today,frustrated with their lack of success with women seem to look back at the past with rose tinted spectacles. You want to go back two hundred years and get killed in a dual because some beta clown wants to steal your girl? Forced to marry a chick you knocked up because her only viable career path was housewife? To the 1950s before feminism? No thanks. As a black guy who loves white women just as much as other races, I’d rather not get Emmett Tilled for flirting with a disgruntled blonde chick.

If you are not getting the results you want in 2018 it is YOUR fault. Either manage your expectations or better yourself.

Weak men who make excuses for their lack of success fail to pass on their genes. This is nothing new. Except now there aren’t mass wars every ten years to decimate the male population.

I recently turned 30. I have no real desire to just sport fvck women. I’ve dated the ‘good’ girls and the slvts, doctors, nurses lawyers, accountants, college girls, church girls, tattooed chicks, photographers, musicians, gym bunnies, Italians, French, Spanish, Americans, banged h00kers, done threesomes and orgies. The point is I’ve lived and must be approaching a triple digit lay count by now.

I want a family and a good LTR is central to that. Having been raised by a single mother, who later remarried I know this to be very much a sub-optimal environment for kids. So, it’s vital that you get it right the first time. Who you choose to LTR and/or have children with is one of the most important decisions you’ll make in your life and a major determinant to your long-term success and happiness.

I’m setting up this journal in order to hold myself accountable. And to define for myself what it is I value. I find that if you visualise a goal and then write it down, you’re much more likely to accomplish it. It also leaves you nowhere to hide because it forces you to confront a reality: 'You want [insert desire]? What exactly are YOU doing to make it happen?'

I will then aim to review and update at least once or twice a month.

In my next post I'll create a clear picture of the ideal and then detail what it is I’m actually going to do to get closer to finding the woman I want.

 

[BeTheChange]

Physically this is my ideal. Saw her in an instagram post some time last week. Don't know if she is an actual fitness model. My last ex had a very similar body type - looks to be around the same fat %, body shape, shoulders, etc. Ex had a better ass and legs but not quite as pretty in the face (this girl below has incredible lips). Point is I know it's in the realms of possibility to LTR because I've already had comparable.

 

[BeTheChange]

What I want

Non-negotiables:
Fitness Freak. Doesn’t need to be gym, although this would be ideal due to the shared interest and the stronger likelihood of a squat butt. However as great as the peach is, this is more about lifestyle. Time waits for no-one and a healthy lifestyle is one of the few things, bar surgery that can slow the inevitable post wall decline.

Includes gym goers, yogis, regular dancers. If you ‘watch your diet’ but don’t do some sort of strenuous physical activity at least once a week I’m not interested

Under 30 in age.


Important:
Degree educated.


Desirable:
Likes to party/dance (hip hop, salsa, Latin, ball room, etc.). Dance is a regular part of my life at the moment and I don’t want it to end. I stopped going as much when I got into my last LTR to the detriment of my skills on the dancefloor!

Foreign. Not only do they bring another language to the relationship but also a different perspective and culture. This can be a great thing.

23 – 26 years old. 22 and below is too young, especially in big metropolitan cities. These girls just want to have fun. At 27 – 29, unless they have outstanding genetics, it's more difficult time-wise to develop an authentic relationship before they hit the wall. Plus older women are generally more jaded.

Extroverted and social. I am also extroverted and social but prefer not to be the one primarily burdened with social planning. I’ve dated and enjoyed time with introverts, but this aspect can get tiring.

Indifferent to marriage. I would actually bend on this (with a prenup of course) if she hit most of the above but obvious preference is for no state sanctioned contract



What I’m doing to make it happen

I’d be a hypocrite if I said I wanted someone with a top body without being in shape myself. I already have a decent body but aiming to put on more size and take better care of my body outside of the gym. The big one for me on this is actually approaching women in the gym, something I haven’t done in years. Will also be attending one yoga class a week and continuing to game girls at salsa social events

Attending salsa and bachata classes and socials at least twice a week

Either out in the field, partying or dating every other weekend. I have a great social circle, so this shouldn’t be an issue. Meetup groups are a solid last resort as well.

May also explore getting some professional photos taken for OD. Only considering Tinder and Bumble. Don't believe there will be any social HB8+s on POF or Match under the age of 30, without kids.

In short get out hard, get out often and approach with standards. Be social.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Physically this is my ideal. My last ex had a very similar body type - same fat %, body shape, shoulders, etc. Ex had a better ass, but not as pretty in the face (this girl below has incredible lips). Point is I know it's in the realms of possibility.

View attachment 1926

Plenty of "normal" women like this. As usual she should desire you more.

 

[BeTheChange]

I've been doing the 60 day NC challenge and have 5 days to go. Decided I'm going to start the 30 day cold approach challenge, since this is the weakest part of my game. Want to build this into a long term habit. Even if it was 1 HOT girl a day long term that would be 365 women a year.

Going to start doing a minimum of 3 cold approaches a day, EVERYDAY for the next 30 days. Figured that should get me to a 100 approaches in a month. Things die down around Christmas. HB8s and above only.

Will document progress weekly.

 

[BeTheChange]

Marriage criteria has to start from morals, character, mental health, and proven pair bonding ability and work outward. Thesd traits are as rare or more than someone fitting all of the ideals abovem Maybe you are taking that as a "given" and focusing on the other traits but good to keep in mind anyway.

Yeah these are absolutely a given. I am actually dating someone who for the most part, satisfies the criteria you mentioned, but just isn't quite 'enough' for me physically. And given she is still young (25) it will only get worse. Already decided if I've not found a 'unicorn' by this time next year I'd be willing to wife her up permanently but got to give myself a solid chance in this market.

 

[AttackFormation]

Where are you doing this? Asia? Europe? (Latin) America?

 

[BeTheChange]

Where are you doing this? Asia? Europe? (Latin) America?

UK predominantly, but I'll likely be spending a few weekends across the rest of Europe in 2019.

 

[BeTheChange]

Hit my first Bachata night in a long time. Had to leave early but could already see the quality of the poon was stellar. Approached 3 girls. Asked one for the number. Had a decent conversation with her but she wouldn't give it out. Giggled about us bumping into each other again dancing and destiny. Will see her tomorrow after salsa as she says she'll be at the club.

Was also generally social with the guys too.

So glad I made it out. Almost talked myself out of it with the typical excuses but stayed committed.

Trying to build habits that will help create the life I would truly enjoy and coincidentally the one a HB9 would actually want to be a part of. Fitting the salsa/bachata club scene into my weekly schedule is part of that.

 

[BeTheChange]

By some absolutely amazing luck, the CEO of the company I work for has had to fly out to attend to some international business so I'll be able to work from home for the next one or two weeks. I'm keeping my approaches at 3 today since I'm at the office now, and then 10 a day for the next couple of days when I'm at home. More than doable when you live in one of the biggest cities in the world. There are hot single women everywhere.

I'm also intending to go out every night for the next 11 nights straight. Roll on.

 

[Roober]

I firmly believe a man's purpose should NEVER be about finding a woman and starting a family. What starts as an innocent search often ends with an act of desperation, the low percentage hail mary, that is more likely to lose the game than win it.

Pursue your purpose, a real purpose, maybe a new one, and only then will you be able to find a woman who loves, adores, and respects you. Think about the ex that landed you here and your recent ex. 2 years of self-improvement yielded nearly the same result. Don't you wonder why? Do you just want to keep doing the same thing and expect different results? If I remember correctly, your plan now is nearly identical to your plan in the past.

I do wish you the best of luck, but I believe you are starting with a foot deep in the mud.

 

[BeTheChange]

Just hit the salsa bar an hour ago and the hot chick from last night was there. She gave me her number almost straight away. Looks like tonight is going to be a good night!

 

[BeTheChange]

Double post.

 

[BeTheChange]

I firmly believe a man's purpose should NEVER be about finding a woman and starting a family. What starts as an innocent search often ends with an act of desperation, the low percentage hail mary, that is more likely to lose the game than win it.

Pursue your purpose, a real purpose, maybe a new one, and only then will you be able to find a woman who loves, adores, and respects you. Think about the ex that landed you here and your recent ex. 2 years of self-improvement yielded nearly the same result. Don't you wonder why? Do you just want to keep doing the same thing and expect different results? If I remember correctly, your plan now is nearly identical to your plan in the past.

I do wish you the best of luck, but I believe you are starting with a foot deep in the mud.

All of this post is pure fiction. My only purpose in life is women? My relationships ended because I was obsessed with my gfs and they didn't respect me? Lol. Ok then.

Tenacity tried to do the same thing in my Wealth and Success when I just got started. Haters gonna hate!

 

[BeTheChange]

By some absolutely amazing luck, the CEO of the company I work for has had to fly out to attend to some international business so I'll be able to work from home for the next one or two weeks. I'm keeping my approaches at 3 today since I'm at the office now, and then 10 a day for the next couple of days when I'm at home. More than doable when you live in one of the biggest cities in the world. There are hot single women everywhere.

I'm also intending to go out every night for the next 11 nights straight. Roll on.

It's looking like I'll actually have a lot of work to do over the next few weeks so dropping approaches back down to 3, which is better anyway given I'm focusing on quality over quantity.

Had to drop the girl from the previous post as it turns out she isn't under 30. Working all day and then out tonight with a few mates. Should be a good one.

 

[Spaz]

I firmly believe a man's purpose should NEVER be about finding a woman and starting a family. What starts as an innocent search often ends with an act of desperation, the low percentage hail mary, that is more likely to lose the game than win it.

Pursue your purpose, a real purpose, maybe a new one, and only then will you be able to find a woman who loves, adores, and respects you. Think about the ex that landed you here and your recent ex. 2 years of self-improvement yielded nearly the same result. Don't you wonder why? Do you just want to keep doing the same thing and expect different results? If I remember correctly, your plan now is nearly identical to your plan in the past.

I do wish you the best of luck, but I believe you are starting with a foot deep in the mud.

Exactly.

Men starting off searching for marriageable women for marriage is weakness of character - that neediness is best suited for females.

Once u hv achieved even a modicum of greatness, women will be eyeing you and trying to trap you into marriage - that is a woman's primary role in relationships.

If you keep on changing how you do things but keep getting the same results then it's the way you think that needs changing.

 

[Ranger]

Before I read the rational male and came here I had already come to some conclusions about life and things based on just personal observation. Sure I read some things the last 5-10 years off and on. But they were all lacking a type of certainty that I look for whenever I study something. Basically if I read something on building a rocket, if I cant build a rocket by the end of the book, it was not a good book or the author didn't really know how to build a rocket.

The only purpose of marriage...well there isn't one. Women are for bearing our children. Male children should be mentored by men and female children should be mentored by females. Thinking back...I cant remember one valuable thing that my mother taught me. Nothing really that would help me as a man. She was just mom.

Married men get less sex than single men. That in itself will lower your testosterone. We live in a docile world with little or no danger. We are bombarded with political hacks and degenerates. The masses look to these degenerates to solve their problems.
So let me ask this question... what will marriage give a man that he doesn't already have?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Before I read the rational male and came here I had already come to some conclusions about life and things based on just personal observation. Sure I read some things the last 5-10 years off and on. But they were all lacking a type of certainty that I look for whenever I study something. Basically if I read something on building a rocket, if I cant build a rocket by the end of the book, it was not a good book or the author didn't really know how to build a rocket.

The only purpose of marriage...well there isn't one. Women are for bearing our children. Male children should be mentored by men and female children should be mentored by females. Thinking back...I cant remember one valuable thing that my mother taught me. Nothing really that would help me as a man. She was just mom.

Married men get less sex than single men. That in itself will lower your testosterone. We live in a docile world with little or no danger. We are bombarded with political hacks and degenerates. The masses look to these degenerates to solve their problems.
So let me ask this question... what will marriage give a man that he doesn't already have?

How can a LTR bf or married man keep good treatment and an abundance of sex going in his relationship?

 

[Ranger]

How can a LTR bf or married man keep good treatment and an abundance of sex going in his relationship?

IMO, 95% of men will not even come close to that. She needs to see you as optimum and critical for her survival.
As the hot, good feelings begin to whither and disappear, she will revert. This present society does not lend itself to successful family unity’s. Theres no damgerous environment to prompt her to high performance in the ways of women.
She doesn’t even have to worry about food. In fact, she can turn into a porker and be considered beautiful.
In actually, she wants a dangerous environment. She wants to have to forage and work to bring her part of survival in with a man’s.
This civilization is on its way out. I agree with DEE

 

[mrgoodstuff]

IMO, 95% of men will not even come close to that. She needs to see you as optimum and critical for her survival.
As the hot, good feelings begin to whither and disappear, she will revert. This present society does not lend itself to successful family unity’s. Theres no damgerous environment to prompt her to high performance in the ways of women.
She doesn’t even have to worry about food. In fact, she can turn into a porker and be considered beautiful.
In actually, she wants a dangerous environment. She wants to have to forage and work to bring her part of survival in with a man’s.
This civilization is on its way out. I agree with DEE

What about competition between other women? What about cutting her off? Im talking no holds barred what can men do that find themselves in that situation?