Need help coping, post-breakup with a borderline personality disorder (BPD) woman

[Spaz]

My brother was a marine raider. I was a marine reservist, but i was 0311, had an oth for failing a drug test though and never deployed. Even when i failed that drug test, and i went to go to monthly drill, because i couldn't even take my rifle out of the armory, i said fvck that and when ua. What was the point of i didnt even have a rifle. They made me pick up a stick and train with that. After a couple drills i moved to another state with my gf at the time and she supported me financially for a few months, always wanted sex, at one point she just gave me the credit card her rich Chinese father gave her and said "here just keep it in your wallet so you don't have to ask". Even when i did work, most of my money went yo cigarettes, beet, weed, or whatever else i may have been doing. That girl is phd student in finance.

So I'm but saying I'm a player or have iy together at all, but for some reason ive been the one kind of taking advantage of women, whereas most men here are the ones they get used. Thats all i mean. Even my last ex supported me financially for like 7 months. Even when i started working i never paid her rent or for groceries (i offered money and she always refused to take it.) all my money would go to cigarettes, and my habits.

Or the women i dated before my ex either paid for me, or at least only for Their selves.

I've gone through dry spells but I've never really paid for women. Even when i was in 7th grade, I had a girl ask me out, in high school too. But it's probably because I was kind of shy and didn't give women or anyone much attention and i think i have good genes.

Smells like drama and a headache.

Is that how you ended up in halfway houses for rehabilitation?

 

[Soflobro#3]

No. We call that a mooch. Lol
A man who can’t even take care of himself. Drug habit. Yep. Good genes. That’s what men should be aspiring to.
I would rather go without sex the rest of my life. At least I could build an empire.
Why do you think we would be impressed with you? LMAO
You use a hack which I also agree works. But you are still a failure as a man. We want both. The women and the success.
Would you trade all the women you know to have your life put back together they way you really want?
The best man with women I’ve ever met said he would trade it all for a shot at being in charge of his own life.
Again. I don’t care. I’m not interested in you. Our prisons are full of alpha males.
I would have booted you out of the Corps as well. You’re not worthy.

Lol stay mad. I never really asked for anything, they offered and i took it. You don't even know me or how things happened. These women chose to give to me. I told you just a little bit to make my point that in terms of dealing with women i have better skills than a lot of the men that are on this forum.

Now your back to your whiteknight thinking acting like no matter what, women are victims of men and even if a man was victimized it was his own fault. You don't have it figured out as much ads you think you do if you think like this. Ive tried explaining to you where your flaws in your thinking is but, like a woman, you dont listen to reason. A lot of marines were whiteknight betas too so don't feel to bad.

Like i would tell my full story to a seething little beta b1tch who's just going to twist what i say and use it to attack me, like a woman would. Thats very feminine.

 

[Soflobro#3]

Smells like drama and a headache.

Is that how you ended up in halfway houses for rehabilitation?

Haha still mad? I don't give a fvck what you think and if you truly think so little of me, how pathetic are you to try so hard to put down someone who you act like is so below you. You're an insecure phony and a whiteknight.

 

[Ranger]

We aren’t even on topic now. LMAO

 

[Spaz]

He has an intense desire to project he's an Alpha. Keeps on mentioning it, even directs PM me to inform me.

Not sure why.

Ok Soflobro since this is ur # 3 account, I'll be magnanimous, you're the man, the main man, the alpha male.

See SS is like a halfway house now for you.

Rehabilitation is ongoing !

 

[Soflobro#3]

No. We call that a mooch. Lol
A man who can’t even take care of himself. Drug habit. Yep. Good genes. That’s what men should be aspiring to.
I would rather go without sex the rest of my life. At least I could build an empire.
Why do you think we would be impressed with you? LMAO
You use a hack which I also agree works. But you are still a failure as a man. We want both. The women and the success.
Would you trade all the women you know to have your life put back together they way you really want?
The best man with women I’ve ever met said he would trade it all for a shot at being in charge of his own life.
Again. I don’t care. I’m not interested in you. Our prisons are full of “alpha males”.
I would have booted you out of the Corps as well. You’re not worthy.

Also i had only one misdemeanor in my life 10 years ago. Just because a guy is a criminal or "bad boy" doesn't mean he's good with women at all. I know a bunch of men that are straight criminals and many of them are complete betas with women. Prisons are not full of men that are good with women, this is a myth.

And you have no idea what kind of man i am, and just because I'm at a low point doesn't mean anything at all. I'll be just fine and you kind of sound feminine for even saying something like that to me, but that's your fault and problem. You really mean nothing to me so it doesn't matter. You and spaz are probably boyfriends and secret feminists that are paid shills to come on this forum and spread misinformation to throw a wrench in the gears and help the feminine imperative. Personally i call for you both to be banned.

 

[Soflobro#3]

He has an intense desire to project he's an Alpha. Keeps on mentioning it, even directs PM me to inform me.

Not sure why.

Ok Soflobro since this is ur # 3 account, I'll be magnanimous, you're the man, the main man, the alpha male.

See SS is like a halfway house now for you.

Rehabilitation is ongoing !

I dont try to project anything, you just probably think I'm alpha and that has nothing to do with what ive said. Thanks for the compliment.

 

[Spaz]

Calm down boy..

Remember, u r the man now.

I've acknowledged it.

Now go in peace and celebrate life.

Meanwhile irl scout around for a job.

 

[Ranger]

lol

 

[Ranger]

If you don't think it's an actual disorder then you haven't dated one.

One thing is they play the waif role which appeals to white knights. Another is extremely sexual which is nuff said. Finally, flattery and easy so feeds the ego.

Maybe I have dated one. Every one of those symptoms and traits I have experienced. But you could be right. Let’s say you are.
But we can’t rid the world of these women who use the traits for their benefit. Just knowing the traits will not save a man. He will still fall for one. And let’s say that he sees one or two of these very common traits in a woman. Does he dump her? Even though she isn’t afflicted with this disorder?

Is it possible that with one man she displays a couple of these traits yet doesn’t with another man?
My only issue with it and the only common denominator is the men. I’ve observed all of those traits in the woman I married for over 20 years and had four children with.

Here’s the really big question. I mean it’s a doozy.
“Why aren’t the men she cheated with on here wrecked? Just the guy she was supposedly having a “relationship” with?”

I’m not saying I’m all knowing. I’m just connecting the dots in my head. If it was actually a disorder every man she encounters would be suffering from something. I have some pretty good experience with a couple of actual sosiopaths. No matter who they hang out with, those people end up doing poorly in their lives. All of them.

Is it something in a man’s frame or how he is inadvertently setting himself up?
How the hell does an experienced chameleon see this? Predators know who to go after. Body language. Disposition. Everything.
So let’s look at it like a profiler.

A guy is walking around just living his life. With even his posture and mannerisms he is exhibiting something that the chameleon is picking up on her radar.
What is in his frame that is causing this?

So she reads him and mimics back everything he is looking for. A few conversations later, she even has the specifics. Not because you told her but because she can see it.

I think guys running around being worried about this disorder will actually pull one it.
Let’s just assume that frame is a vacuum. What you think? You get. You think bad thoughts? They become you.

So what is inherently existing in that man’s frame from the onset that sets him up?

 

[Ranger]

I can tell youve been reading a lot of Rollo haha.

Some men were analytical enough to come places like this, some weren't. These women fail in every relationship. These women cut themselves and are suicidal, are those normal female traits too? Sleeping with 200-500 rando men?

Cluster Bs target men for different reasons. Separate issue. Obviously a guy who pumps and dumps doesn't see the full crazy. Some are indiscriminate. The main thing is that men who have low self esteem stick around much longer when the mask comes off.

Lol well not just Rollo. Before I switched majors I studied criminology.
I totally get what you’re saying. So when you’re called a homophobe, we both know you are not actually afraid of them. Yet it’s classified as a disorder. That book is now over 4” thick and they add more all the time. Do you think that they are all true?
The FBI knows they’re crap. Most smart law enforcement know for a fact the bulk are crap.

If it’s a numbers game then every experienced hooker is this disorder. Well they aren’t.
I could go through the whole list. There are very legitimate nymphomaniacs out there. Are you saying they have it?

Even if you are right. What’s in a man’s frame that draws them in. I watched a video a while back. The guy giving the class was a very legitimate PUA. HIGHLY successful. He was nearly destroyed. If he has no defense and a huge support system then who does have a defense?

I’m not saying this isn’t ugly in the least. I can see guys killing themselves over it.
But what is giving it a name going to solve for a man? In some cases he may never get over it.

So my question again is what element do you think is in their frame?

That which you fear....pursues
That which you confront....flees

 

[Ranger]

You understand that some men will breeze through a woman like this, right?

 

[Spaz]

Introverted sensitive men r mostly attracted to crazies and vice versa.

These men has big imaginations with so many wants and needs that they yearn to find a woman who can unlock all their desires and fantasies.

And when he finds one, she'll eagerly join all his fancy fantasies and enjoys it. Run naked under the rain ? No problem. Make love under the stars ? Sure. Get a blow job while driving ? Of course. Get some action in the a$$ ? She'll moan and cvm.

She'll make him feel so special, and yes, he'll fall fast in love her for it and eventually declare his undying devotion.

That's the pull of the crazies for the sensitive introverted guy. He can't help it. She's there listening to all of ur childhood problems, nodding her head in sympathy, offering comfort.

The sensitive introvert man is now in complete thrall, body and soul owned by the crazy simply because he thinks he has finally achieved DJ status, that status in life that has eluded him for so long because he has finally gotten to do stuff that other "cool" men gets to do.

But as time passes, when the magic of the love fades, when you realise that she changes too fast for you to keep up, it's already too late for you.

Am I right @LARaiders85 ?

 

[Ranger]

Oh damn that’s classic. Lol

 

[Ranger]

I talked to a young woman just a week ago with scars on her arms. Obvious knife wounds. I know because I have one under my arm from a philipino girl and her butterfly knife.

I asked about them and she said she was in a bad place at the (past) and didn’t want to talk about them. Lol.

I remember reading about the American plains tribes. When a close loved one was lost or killed a woman would cut herself repeatedly. I found out after that, that it really does release pain and grief and other undesirable emotions. Scientific study.

So it makes sense that things will build up in a woman until she reaches a point where there’s no place to hold those emotions so she cuts herself to release it.
I never ran across a case of a man doing it, except before what he knew was his final battle. It perhaps released his fear.

I know marines that were hit and still functional having this relieved look on their face. All the tension and stress is gone. The strain is gone. Emotional release. Some are actually in the best spirits they have been in, in a long time.

 

[Ranger]

Not automatically. Brad Pitt married one.

Yep. Married one. I estimate 20% or Around that number are crazies. Two out of ten.

 

[Ranger]

So how do you get a guy who pulls them in with his frame, to spin plates until he figures it out?
Or until he fixes his frame.

 

[Ranger]

There isn’t a PUA or Tomassi or anyone else that doesn’t recommend dating as many women as possible (spin plates) long enough to figure out what’s going on.
Now it easy for me to say that because I know for a fact that one will Not have a girlfriend and I will never have a traditional “Relationship” in the strictest sense.
But I do remember a time as a 20 year old that I was not even close to being ready. I wanted a “girlfriend” of course. It always seemed after I had sex with them a few times and most of the times just once, I was ready to go exploring. I thought there was something wrong with me. When actually there was nothing wrong with me.

But I soooo get it because I fell in love and got married.

 

[Billtx49]

But I do remember a time as a 20 year old that I was not even close to being ready. I wanted a “girlfriend” of course.

Yes, that’s how men get snagged by a damaged woman. Said men are looking for a serious relationship, find a woman they think is normal that loves having sex all the time, and don’t know enough about damaged women to have a long discovery time. Yes, they operate like normal females that want to catch a man, but what the deniers don’t realize is the extreme and prolonged nature of their hooking actions.
A man dates 20-40 normal girls and gets into a mode of thinking that all women he meets are normal and treat him right… Then he comes across the abnormal one…

 

[Ranger]

Yes, that’s how men get snagged by a damaged woman. Said men are looking for a serious relationship, find a woman they think is normal that loves having sex all the time, and don’t know enough about damaged women to have a long discovery time. Yes, they operate like normal females that want to catch a man, but what the deniers don’t realize is the extreme and prolonged nature of their hooking actions.
A man dates 20-40 normal girls and gets into a mode of thinking that all women he meets are normal and treat him right… Then he comes across the abnormal one…

I’m absolutely certain I threw away better women than the one I married.