I Have a Decision To Make in Less Than 2 Years

[Desdinova]

1. She kind of just moved herself in? How does that even happen?

That's a bit of a long story, but the short of it is she needed to sell her house. She was supposed to move in with a friend of hers, but that fell through. She was already spending a lot of time at my place.

Us she educated?

Yes

Does she have a solid income near or as much as yours?

Not near, but not minimum wage either.

I have a hard time with this one as you explained it because it seems that you desire for easy sex trumped your standards.

I could care less about easy sex. Masturbation is easy sex.

Is your lack of the commitment a fear of failure or a just not the desire to do so?

I've been engaged twice, married once. I've been there and done it. I could care less if I do it again. I'm happy enough just living with her. I don't need a ring or a ceremony.

I would think there should be a burning desire to commit long term, but a man would hesitate out of fear allowing plenty of time to properly evaluate his partner.

It's not out of fear, it's being sure I'm not with another piece of garbage. I could have jumped into a lot of relationships head-on, but almost all of the women I've been with were garbage.

If they cannot wait for you to be ready, then they are probably not the right person.

Women have an expiration date, and I need to keep that in mind. I would see it as disrespectful to her if I were to ignore that expiration date.

But my question is, do you treat her like a queen?

I treat her well, but not like a queen.

Women will still give more, but eventually she will need more in return. otherwise, resentment builds and eventually kills the relationship. I would think that is one of the biggest killers in relationships these days; mens failure to adapt to women in the workforce. You cant expect a woman to raise a family, work, take care of the house, and be an awesome partner while you just work and act like a mediocre partner.

The biggest killer of relationships is men becoming boring and treating their woman like a queen.

And please stop with the "theory". While your ideas have merit, your high score is merely an unproven hypothesis.

The only person I need my theory proven to is me, and I see proof of it all the time. When the woman in a relationship is taken at an early age, the relationship has a higher success rate. In other words, she hasn't been alpha-widowed. I can't ignore that when I see older women getting into relationships and having them fail repeatedly.

As for my theory, I'm the one who alpha-widowed her and then came back from the grave. That's high score theory and emotional fluctuation all wrapped into one. The emotional imprint I've left on my GF is massive.

You can 5hit on my theory all you want, but as long as I keep seeing it prove itself in real life, I'm going to keep it embedded in my mind while I watch relationships succeed and fail.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Keep her but never lose frame.

My gf is 29. One day she told me she was ready for the next step. I told her I don´t know if I´m ever going to want to have a kid, or move in together or get married; and that she could meet new people if she wanted.

She cried for a couple of days but then she decided she wants to risk it and stay with me. She doesn´t hang out with dudes even though I practically gave her permission.

I thought she was gonna break up with me or something but no. Looks like she fell hard for me or something.

 

[AJ84]

Keep her but never lose frame.

My gf is 29. One day she told me she was ready for the next step. I told her I don´t know if I´m ever going to want to have a kid, or move in together or get married; and that she could meet new people if she wanted.

She cried for a couple of days but then she decided she wants to risk it and stay with me. She doesn´t hang out with dudes even though I practically gave her permission.

I thought she was gonna break up with me or something but no. Looks like she fell hard for me or something.

No, she will try again to change your mind, because she has already invested time in you, time not spent on a guy who wants marriage and children. She will bring it up again, and eventually become resentful and dump you for the first agreeable guy that wants kids.
Des is right, there is an expiration date. Women who want kids and see the window closing will drop amblivant guys. She can get another dude anytime, but she can’t have kids anytime. You were honest with her though and told her to meet someone else. She will do that eventually as the window gets smaller.

 

[AttackFormation]

The biggest killer of relationships is men becoming boring and treating their woman like a queen.

Do you have any examples from your own life and day to day interactions with her to show the contrast between what boring simps you know do to their wives, or what they would've done with your girlfriend if they were in your situation, and what you did?

 

[oOh Nasty]

If you're anything like me, this is actually a tricky situation.

I've had my fair share of "good" women. If you've been able to keep yourself sexually excited about her for as long as you have and think that you can do it for a very very much longer time, then I say you've got something good going. However, the problem with keepers is that it's usually us - our inability to feel satiated with our current woman and our needs for conquest when it comes to women.

Even if other women from the outside are a pain in the ass, new p*ssy is still new p*ssy.

 

[Alvafe]

No, she will try again to change your mind, because she has already invested time in you, time not spent on a guy who wants marriage and children. She will bring it up again, and eventually become resentful and dump you for the first agreeable guy that wants kids.
Des is right, there is an expiration date. Women who want kids and see the window closing will drop amblivant guys. She can get another dude anytime, but she can’t have kids anytime. You were honest with her though and told her to meet someone else. She will do that eventually as the window gets smaller.

I would ahve aproached that in another way, like marriage cahnces are will not happen the rest it will do, and if her main request is to marry not to be with me then her priority is not be with someone she love and like is to marry, I serious can't stand a girl like that, if being with you is not ok then she just want a thing to play at

 

[Roober]

That's a bit of a long story, but the short of it is she needed to sell her house. She was supposed to move in with a friend of hers, but that fell through. She was already spending a lot of time at my place.



Yes



Not near, but not minimum wage either.



I could care less about easy sex. Masturbation is easy sex.



I've been engaged twice, married once. I've been there and done it. I could care less if I do it again. I'm happy enough just living with her. I don't need a ring or a ceremony.



It's not out of fear, it's being sure I'm not with another piece of garbage. I could have jumped into a lot of relationships head-on, but almost all of the women I've been with were garbage.



Women have an expiration date, and I need to keep that in mind. I would see it as disrespectful to her if I were to ignore that expiration date.



I treat her well, but not like a queen.



The biggest killer of relationships is men becoming boring and treating their woman like a queen.



The only person I need my theory proven to is me, and I see proof of it all the time. When the woman in a relationship is taken at an early age, the relationship has a higher success rate. In other words, she hasn't been alpha-widowed. I can't ignore that when I see older women getting into relationships and having them fail repeatedly.

As for my theory, I'm the one who alpha-widowed her and then came back from the grave. That's high score theory and emotional fluctuation all wrapped into one. The emotional imprint I've left on my GF is massive.

You can 5hit on my theory all you want, but as long as I keep seeing it prove itself in real life, I'm going to keep it embedded in my mind while I watch relationships succeed and fail.

Sounds like you have it all figured out. Based on what you outlined, it seems like a good situation, so why the question in the thread? Do you not want kids? I cant remember if you have some already.

And I didnt 5hit on your theory, i merely questioned the language you used to describe it. I believe there is a good possibility to a correlation between partner counts and a subconscious ranking system, but its merely a personal opinion with no scientific reasoning. =)

 

[Dingo]

Dude... She sounds pretty good to me...

 

[Desdinova]

Do you have any examples from your own life and day to day interactions with her to show the contrast between what boring simps you know do to their wives, or what they would've done with your girlfriend if they were in your situation, and what you did?

Sure...

The first girl I was engaged to... I treated her like a queen. She wanted something, I jumped. She wanted chocolate, I went to the store just for her. She demanded every morning that I bring her a cigarette in bed, I did it regardless of her falling asleep with it in her hand. I thanked her after every time we had sex. When she broke up with me, I took the last of my money for two weeks and bought her a rose and left it by the window where she was staying. None of that made her stay with me.

As for my GF, her first BF got a tattoo of her face, wrote songs for her and posted them on youtube, and stalked the hell out of her which forced her to get a restraining order against him.

Needless to say, I don't do any of this 5hit with her. I make her laugh pretty much every day, I occasionally say 5hit that causes her to call me an a55hole (all while she's laughing), and I'm not desperate for sex.

Based on what you outlined, it seems like a good situation, so why the question in the thread? Do you not want kids? I cant remember if you have some already.

I'm just a bit intimidated by the thought of making a commitment like this again. I wasn't planning on it. I was already in the process of planning my life out to embrace being solitary. I was pretty excited about it, and then she decided to stick to me.

I already have one child. I don't mind having another one, but that's a bit of a process since I've already had a vasectomy.

 

[BreezyB84]

Sure...

The first girl I was engaged to... I treated her like a queen. She wanted something, I jumped. She wanted chocolate, I went to the store just for her. She demanded every morning that I bring her a cigarette in bed, I did it regardless of her falling asleep with it in her hand. I thanked her after every time we had sex. When she broke up with me, I took the last of my money for two weeks and bought her a rose and left it by the window where she was staying. None of that made her stay with me.

As for my GF, her first BF got a tattoo of her face, wrote songs for her and posted them on youtube, and stalked the hell out of her which forced her to get a restraining order against him.

Needless to say, I don't do any of this 5hit with her. I make her laugh pretty much every day, I occasionally say 5hit that causes her to call me an a55hole (all while she's laughing), and I'm not desperate for sex.



I'm just a bit intimidated by the thought of making a commitment like this again. I wasn't planning on it. I was already in the process of planning my life out to embrace being solitary. I was pretty excited about it, and then she decided to stick to me.

I already have one child. I don't mind having another one, but that's a bit of a process since I've already had a vasectomy.

@Desdinova- your hesitations are natural and you obviously are one of the most respected people on the forum. I think you should go with how you feel(while still be smart) and don't over think it my brother.

 

[Roober]

Sure...

The first girl I was engaged to... I treated her like a queen. She wanted something, I jumped. She wanted chocolate, I went to the store just for her. She demanded every morning that I bring her a cigarette in bed, I did it regardless of her falling asleep with it in her hand. I thanked her after every time we had sex. When she broke up with me, I took the last of my money for two weeks and bought her a rose and left it by the window where she was staying. None of that made her stay with me.

As for my GF, her first BF got a tattoo of her face, wrote songs for her and posted them on youtube, and stalked the hell out of her which forced her to get a restraining order against him.

Needless to say, I don't do any of this 5hit with her. I make her laugh pretty much every day, I occasionally say 5hit that causes her to call me an a55hole (all while she's laughing), and I'm not desperate for sex.



I'm just a bit intimidated by the thought of making a commitment like this again. I wasn't planning on it. I was already in the process of planning my life out to embrace being solitary. I was pretty excited about it, and then she decided to stick to me.

I already have one child. I don't mind having another one, but that's a bit of a process since I've already had a vasectomy.

That certainly makes sense, and it's good you woke up to the error of your ways. I made many of the same mistakes with the woman that led me to SS, almost feels disgraceful when I think about it.

As far as committing again, it is certainly a slippery slope and definitely highly suspect considering how easily things can come to an end. While my divorce was mostly civil and I ended up with the upper hand, it is still difficult to even fathom the idea of failing again. So, you should evaluate the positives and negatives. How do we teach our kids about relationships if we haven't been successful ourselves.

One of the great things I've realized and I'm sure you have as well, is that she is no special snowflake. There are many good women who are capable of commitment and/or children if that does eventually become a goal of yours (it doesn't seem like a current goal). Based on what you've shared here, your approach seems to be a bit of "let's go with the flow ".

A good start may be to evaluate the risks to your finances, family, and your sanity and determine if you are willing to risk those on this woman. For example, my lady makes slightly less than me, we have no property together, nor kids together. Marrying her (if it crossed my mind) carries very little risk. My mind is in a good place, and my finances are secure.

If fear is your only concern, then remember Wayne gretzky... "you only miss the shots you dont take".

 

[Reyaj]

I don't have any reasons. It's mostly just me thinking out loud. Women needs that commitment, and they also want to reproduce before it's too late. These are things I have to think about. If I had it my way, I'd just continue as is, but that's not the case

Sounds exactly like my thought process. I am just scared of conforming and being a family man even though deep down I think that's what would fulfill me in life. You're just a lot more mature than I am I guess. However being in the 40 range and still going out and meeting more women is starting to disenchant me. Most are complete garbage I'm sorry to say (at least western.. and those who are foreign get Americanized quick!).

The facade so many on this site speak of is that you can easily have so many women being single therefore you should never commit etc... What no one on here has the balls or sadly the experience to admit is that most "QUALITY" women want marriage or commitment.

Does anyone on here have a daughter? I wonder what you'd all tell her she should look for when evaluating a guy... I bet it would be things that are AFC qualities.... I dare any of you to indulge yourself in that hypothetical scenario!

 

[Reyaj]

If you're anything like me, this is actually a tricky situation.

I've had my fair share of "good" women. If you've been able to keep yourself sexually excited about her for as long as you have and think that you can do it for a very very much longer time, then I say you've got something good going. However, the problem with keepers is that it's usually us - our inability to feel satiated with our current woman and our needs for conquest when it comes to women.

Even if other women from the outside are a pain in the ass, new p*ssy is still new p*ssy.

Holy **** yes! This is how I feel.... What do we do??????

 

[Desdinova]

What no one on here has the balls or sadly the experience to admit is that most "QUALITY" women want marriage or commitment.

I'd have to say that most women, quality or not, want marriage. The ones that are willing to make the necessary sacrifices to make marriage successful are far and few between. The rest want to have their cake and eat it too.

Does anyone on here have a daughter? I wonder what you'd all tell her she should look for when evaluating a guy

I'm thankful I have a son. If I were to have a daughter, I think I'd dread her becoming an adult knowing what I know.

 

[Reyaj]

I'd have to say that most women, quality or not, want marriage. The ones that are willing to make the necessary sacrifices to make marriage successful are far and few between. The rest want to have their cake and eat it too.

I agree most in general do. I guess the point I was trying to make is that you aren't going find a quality who is cool with an open relationship or knows you are spinning plates. You need to at least give them the impression of a commitment.

I'm thankful I have a son. If I were to have a daughter, I think I'd dread her becoming an adult knowing what I know.

I am scared to have one also... But if you are open to another child with your current girl you have to consider this is possible. What do you think you'd tell her with regards to guys and dating?

 

[Desdinova]

But if you are open to another child with your current girl you have to consider this is possible. What do you think you'd tell her with regards to guys and dating?

That's the part where I'm going to have problems. I honestly see women as only being able to have one chance to get it right, and most of them get it wrong. Also, logic goes out the window when women start dating.

 

[touma.akagi]

If you love each other then stay together. It sounds to me that she cares more than you do, that's fine. It means you control the relationship. So instead of ending it, control it!

Let me ask you a question. Would you rather have a woman who's "expired" and loves you, or be an older man struggling to get young women who don't?

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I've known my GF since she was 20 years old. She pursued me for 2 years. I started dating her when she was 22. She has recently turned 25 years old. In total, I've known her for nearly five years, and I'm the only real significant man she's had in her life. She only had one partner until I fvcked her (about a year before we started dating, and then told her I didn't want anything serious.)

I've stated time and time again that a woman's expiry date is when they turn 27. That is when I have to make the decision of whether to keep her in my life, or terminate the relationship and let her go free. That is when the biological clock starts making itself known.

So here's where things currently stand. I've been living with her for a while now. It was never really an option and it was never discussed. She just kinda moved in. It didn't really bother me since I haven't had any genuine complaints about her, and I still don't. She no longer has her own life because she's adapted herself to my life, and seems pretty content with it. Her sole purpose seems to be making sure I'm fed, healthy, strong, and able to keep going with life. When I'm not well, she worries and does everything she can to get me better.

If I were to terminate the relationship, she would be completely lost. I have absolutely no clue what she would do. I know I'd be fine because I've already lived through two major breakups and life re-builds. But her? She would be pretty devastated. That's usually how women end up on the c0ck carousel.

Seven years of evaluating a woman for keeps is pretty damn good. I told her if I were to actually commit, I'd be fine with a celebration and even rings, but I wouldn't want any legal documents involved. She's not exactly thrilled with that idea, but she's willing to do it my way.

She doesn't smoke, drink, gamble, she's proud to be feminine, and her friends are good women in their own rights. She has a few flaws that I've been putting up with, but they're minor in comparison to some of the majorly damaged bytches that I've dated and fvcked in the past.

We shall see how the next two years progress...

Des mate,

I think you're over thinking it.

I don't believe in marriage nor monogamy. Ironically enough, I am the product of the nuclear family. Mom and dad. Father swung the ****in hammer. Mom watched Me.

The thing is, its not that day nor time anymore. You already living in cohabitation. Pending state, likely similar to marriage, and yet, I like your take.

Create your own ventures outside state and gov. The sec you have kids, if they cannot divorce rape you, they will child support rape you. By they, I mean scorned women and the state.

Here's the thing. She dedicated her best year's. Assuming no cucky weird ****, you could be worse off.

As for 27, I dunno. I think peak is 18-23. Some are banging when older but biology I'd as it is.

If you're going full on, pick the girl that gave her best year's. And if locked away for life, she be waiting for you. IMHO that's not females nature.

Don't make it more then it is. I've known girls banging at all ages but I like young. Those aren't trying to crater SMV with a kid at 18 unless crazy.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

That's the part where I'm going to have problems. I honestly see women as only being able to have one chance to get it right, and most of them get it wrong. Also, logic goes out the window when women start dating.

+ 1

It coincided with RooshV #21 podcast about male guidance and women's running a muck now a days. Its all IG ass pics and cratering SMV. Scarface, don't get high on your own supply.

Reminds me of Ronda Rousey, tough guy one sec. Crying after KO talking suicide and needing babies lol


There's a certain reality that women are faced with. Red pill awareness is a double edged sword.

If you love or care about her even if you don't see a future, drop her off sooner then later.