She said I have to earn her kiss?

[AriMamba]

So I have been out with this girls and everytime I tried to kiss her she says “you have to earn that” I thought it was her playing hard to get but she invites me to her apt and it was raining so I had to spend the night and she tells me to get in bed with her, but I didn’t try anything sexual just cuddle because of what she said earlier.

So can an alpha break this down for me? I have never seen this kind of tricks from a woman. And this is like the first time I slept with a girl in her bed without deflowering her.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

So I have been out with this girls and everytime I tried to kiss her she says “you have to earn that” I thought it was her playing hard to get but she invites me to her apt and it was raining so I had to spend the night and she tells me to get in bed with her, but I didn’t try anything sexual just cuddle because of what she said earlier.

So can an alpha break this down for me? I have never seen this kind of tricks from a woman. And this is like the first time I slept with a girl in her bed without deflowering her.

Her game submits you and it bleeds masculinity.

You can't earn it, it'll be like her feeding her dog .

She has to desire it . Don't sleep in the bed unless your having sex .


Spend more time with another or away from her.
S

 

[Billtx49]

She’s teasing and playing with you. Have to earn a kiss? Sleep in the same bed with no sex? Find a girl that’s serious about you, and/or learn how to sexually escalate… This one is probably history.

 

[marmel75]

She feels completely unthreatened by you the same way she feels unthreatened by a little puppy.

She does not respect your masculinity stop wasting time with her. You cannot negotiate attraction. Go find other women who are highly attracted to you.

 

[IKO69]

She was trying to establish dominance. I would've laughed and not taken her seriously. If whatever interaction we had went south after, oh well.

The right women will appreciate you being this way. DOn't be a woman's little ***** boy.

 

[skinnyguy]

My ex oneitis did the same thing. She crawled into my bed, but didn’t let me smash. I should have left way sooner. Some guys on SS would tell you to force yourself on this girl (lol) but you don’t wanna end up in handcuffs I’m betting.

You want to be with girls who are DTF and don’t act this way. This girl not only is a lost cause, she’s also not the type of girl you want to be with. She will let some tattooed bad boy smash her on the first date. Don’t believe the “you have to earn it” bull****. She’s playing you. And now that you let her dominate you, she will never respect you.

 

[AJ84]

So I have been out with this girls and everytime I tried to kiss her she says “you have to earn that” I thought it was her playing hard to get but she invites me to her apt and it was raining so I had to spend the night and she tells me to get in bed with her, but I didn’t try anything sexual just cuddle because of what she said earlier.

So can an alpha break this down for me? I have never seen this kind of tricks from a woman. And this is like the first time I slept with a girl in her bed without deflowering her.

Female perspective: She's dangling the carrot to either get you to behave the way she wants you to where you will be rewarded with consolation sex to reinforce more behaviour to her liking (never ideal), or, she is stringing you along for attention/ validation to boost her ego. Both signs of low interest. If a girl doesn't want to put out that's one thing, but not wanting to put out then inviting you to sleep in her bed while giving you the vibe that you should not make out with her is a demeaning power trip move that will f**k with your head.

You had more than one date with her. You didn't 'earn' her kisses, so what did she do to earn your time and attention despite her entitled princess attitude?

I would suggest dumping her and moving on.

 

[RedScorpion]

Bad news if she’s inviting you into bed but not even getting touchy feely or any kind of further escalation. Under normal conditions that’s pretty much the go ahead to move it along (inviting you to bed with her). I don’t know what happened persay, or if she’s simply teasing you with the ‘you have to earn that’. Initially I would think teasing, but really depends on how everything else went. And by the bed action (or non-action), doesn’t look too good.

If you were cuddling, I’d start carassing or something to see if she responds, returning the action to you. Start moving your arms, hands roaming a bit. She responds, you move it a bit further, she returns the response - continue until you’re both having fun. Or if she doesn’t respond at all after a bit - then something is up, and I think the best would be to realize that this is not a good situation. And decide from there (separate, leave, or something).

It’s really weird she wouldn’t let you kiss her, yet invites you into her bed with her. Backwards even.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Bad news if she’s inviting you into bed but not even getting touchy feely or any kind of further escalation. Under normal conditions that’s pretty much the go ahead to move it along (inviting you to bed with her). I don’t know what happened persay, or if she’s simply teasing you with the ‘you have to earn that’. Initially I would think teasing, but really depends on how everything else went. And by the bed action (or non-action), doesn’t look too good.

If you were cuddling, I’d start carassing or something to see if she responds, returning the action to you. Start moving your arms, hands roaming a bit. She responds, you move it a bit further, she returns the response - continue until you’re both having fun. Or if she doesn’t respond at all after a bit - then something is up, and I think the best would be to realize that this is not a good situation. And decide from there (separate, leave, or something).

It’s really weird she wouldn’t let you kiss her, yet invites you into her bed with her. Backwards even.

She submitted him . It's a power thing . He hasn't fully lost yet, but he's losing . He needs to fvck her.

 

[zekko]

So I have been out with this girls and everytime I tried to kiss her she says “you have to earn that”

That seems like a dangerous mindset in this day and age. If she views her kiss as something to be earned, then she might view it as something of value that you "take" from her. And 20 years from now she'll be joining the #MeToo movement accusing you of sexual harassment or worse.

 

[marmel75]

That seems like a dangerous mindset in this day and age. If she views her kiss as something to be earned, then she might view it as something of value that you "take" from her. And 20 years from now she'll be joining the #MeToo movement accusing you of sexual harassment or worse.

Nah...because nothing he does will be good enough to "earn it"

 

[AriMamba]

Bad news if she’s inviting you into bed but not even getting touchy feely or any kind of further escalation. Under normal conditions that’s pretty much the go ahead to move it along (inviting you to bed with her). I don’t know what happened persay, or if she’s simply teasing you with the ‘you have to earn that’. Initially I would think teasing, but really depends on how everything else went. And by the bed action (or non-action), doesn’t look too good.

If you were cuddling, I’d start carassing or something to see if she responds, returning the action to you. Start moving your arms, hands roaming a bit. She responds, you move it a bit further, she returns the response - continue until you’re both having fun. Or if she doesn’t respond at all after a bit - then something is up, and I think the best would be to realize that this is not a good situation. And decide from there (separate, leave, or something).

It’s really weird she wouldn’t let you kiss her, yet invites you into her bed with her. Backwards even.

I liked all the replies so far.

I was caressing her ass and she seemed to have no problem. At one point I think she was tryna take my pants off but maybe my mind made me think that?

But anyways I know we are not supposed to give women ultimatums but I kinda ask her what she meant by “earning it” and let’s just say she had me convinced that i had her “confused” but now that i re read this thread sounds to me like she is just saying that so she doesn’t lose my validation.

 

[AriMamba]

So would you guys believe me( or her) if i told you the reason she is acting like this is because I didn’t act “interested” in her? Like she mentioned an example saying I don’t “flirt” ? Man idk why I’m still entertaining this girl. Is not like I cannot get anyone else!

 

[zekko]

Nah...because nothing he does will be good enough to "earn it"

That's my point. If he kisses her, she will say he hasn't earned it, and therefore he kissed her against her will.

 

[marmel75]

My ex oneitis did the same thing. She crawled into my bed, but didn’t let me smash. I should have left way sooner. Some guys on SS would tell you to force yourself on this girl (lol) but you don’t wanna end up in handcuffs I’m betting.

You want to be with girls who are DTF and don’t act this way. This girl not only is a lost cause, she’s also not the type of girl you want to be with. She will let some tattooed bad boy smash her on the first date. Don’t believe the “you have to earn it” bull****. She’s playing you. And now that you let her dominate you, she will never respect you.

Yup exactly...guys she has no interest in have to "earn it" but guys she is interested in are tearing her apart on the first date.

 

[R.U.G.]

If she said that, I would had taken her hand, shaken it, said nice to meet you and be on my way.

 

[Tilex]

A man takes what he wants from a woman he desires without hesitation or silly conventional dating rules.
The more rules or resistance she gives you, the less interest she has.

Masculinity = Dominance
Femininity = Submission
The Yin only balances with the Yang.
Always remember this!

If she feminized you, it's over. Forget about her and move on.
She'll never see you in the masculine frame again.
It's an uphill battle to get her interested again.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

A man takes what he wants from a woman he desires without hesitation or silly conventional dating rules.
The more rules or resistance she gives you, the less interest she has.

Masculinity = Dominance
Femininity = Submission
The Yin only balances with the Yang.
Always remember this!

If she feminized you, it's over. Forget about her and move on.
She'll never see you in the masculine frame again.
It's an uphill battle to get her interested again.

The fastest way if there is a chance us to get others interested and fvck them.

 

[old_skoolr]

So I have been out with this girls and everytime I tried to kiss her she says “you have to earn that” I thought it was her playing hard to get but she invites me to her apt and it was raining so I had to spend the night and she tells me to get in bed with her, but I didn’t try anything sexual just cuddle because of what she said earlier.

So can an alpha break this down for me? I have never seen this kind of tricks from a woman. And this is like the first time I slept with a girl in her bed without deflowering her.

Girl: Hey come into bed with me
Old_Skoolr: You have to earn the "D"

Bid her a good night and leave.

Alpha....as.....fvck

 

[greatsnake]

Lol she has to earn your attention, time etc.