No kiss on second “date” - I think this is a lost cause.

[Sgthaytham]

Posts: 94
No kiss on second date - I feel like I’ve completely blown it.
To be honest, I don’t even think these two meetings we’ve had have been actual dates.

First time round I invited her out for dinner. After, she suggested we go get drinks. Date started at 7:30pm and ended at 2:30am - no kiss.

Today, we went for a picnic in the mountains. I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

I did make moves in the touching department. I laid my hand on hers, I got closer to her. I know it’s raher pathetic, but I’m shy and I’m not in the game.

So I feel like I’ve completely blown it with her.

She’s either 1) Not actually interested and hasn’t been since; 2) really confused about the whole thing; 3) going to move on.

The only “good signs” from the date were: her not flinching or moving when I did touch her. And she says she’ll drive to come see me and we’ll do something.

 

[Billtx49]

I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

There is no ‘right’ moment. You can wait forever for that. You’re the man, you make the moment happen. Control your personal anxiety and it all gets easy…

 

[Sgthaytham]

There is no ‘right’ moment. You can wait forever for that to happen. You’re the man, you make the moment. Control your anxiety and at all gets easy…

This all goes hand-in-hand with not knowing 1) whether she likes me, 2) whether we are actually dating and 3) that I’m really into her.

It’s a horrible feeling because at times I really want to make the moves, but I hold myself back due to uncertainty..

 

[Billtx49]

This all goes hand-in-hand with not knowing 1) whether she likes me, 2) whether we are actually dating and 3) that I’m really into her.

It’s a horrible feeling because at times I really want to make the moves, but I hold myself back due to uncertainty..

Only one way to find out. Confidence and knowledge happen by doing.

 

[R.U.G.]

We've all been there. Bro, never do dinner on a first date. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS drinks, preferably at night. Two, always plan for the date and how it's going to proceed. Three, walk the woman back to her car, go for a hug, then glance into her eyes and go for a kiss. Rest assured, she knows you are going to kiss her if you walk her back to her car. If she says no or I'm okay in getting to her car on her own, then just walk away; no spark. Second date, should be an activity; such as gun shooting at a range, mini-golf, batting cages, etc. Do not pick what she wants to do, pick what you want to do. If she doesn't want to come along, then okay. Next her. Reason being, men lead, women follow. If she's sexually interested in you, she will follow. If not, she's just looking to kill time with you and that is all. Keep convo between the dates limited unless she reaches out to you. 7:30pm - 2:30pm is too long. You do not want to appear that you've fallen for her. You want your intensions and feelings to remain a mystery. Two to three hours max and then make an excuse to end the date.

Again, always always always go for a deep kiss and intimate hug. That is to see if there is mutual interest. If she doesn't reciprocate, you are wasting your time. You may need some liquid courage to move forward and go for the kiss. Need to man up. This is what men do.

 

[Murk]

drinks drinks drinks

The last time I went to dinner with a girl was my ex in December when I took her to Nice.

These broads are not making it past a few drinks and my bedroom then back from whence they came

 

[skinnyguy]

You know if she’s into you or not.

Sometimes you could not kiss her on the 5th date and still have a chance. It’s situational

 

[MrWood]

"your lips are actually quite sexy" - go for the kiss

 

[Atom Smasher]

She's going to eventually shut down because of your shyness. If she wants to get together with you for a third time, then she is DEFINITELY highly interested.

Do you know what this means? You have a green light.

It is far better to be rejected for going for the kiss than for being too shy to make a move.

Trust me... if she goes out with you again, she very definitely wants you to go for the kiss. Start to flip the script. You are auditioning HER for a possible role in your life, not the other way around. You are testing her to see if she is acceptable to you.

Remember, her agreeing to see you for a third time is a great big fat green light. She will be expecting and desiring you to kiss her. It's in the bag, so go out and take what's rightfully yours.

It's time to forget these tentative little touches. She is totally aware of your shyness. Surprise her with a bold move this time. If you keep holding off, she will drift away. The reason? In her emotions, she will feel undesirable to you because of your lack of action.

You can't lose. Take the bull by the horns and tell her, "Hey, this Saturday (or whatever day) I'm doing X. I'd like you to come with me." or something like that. She will appreciate your directness and confident way of saying it.

As has been said above, don't let dates last too long. Put an end to it after a few hours. Men are leaders, women followers. They LOVE decisive action. They absolutely go crazy over it, because they can't decide their way out of a paper bag. The genders love that which they lack and that which they see in the other gender.

 

[Sgthaytham]

Thanks for the advice so far guys. It’s helping, but I know it’s up to me to put it into practice.

 

[ohrein]

She's gotta be into you. Seven hour first date? Picnic in the mountains second date? She'll agree to a third date but you gotta make a move or she'll think you're not interested in her. You just gotta man up and go for it.

Regret is worse than rejection. Let that be your mantra on the date.

 

[sazc]

You need to kid her asap or she's going to be confused about YOUR IL and decide to friend zone you

 

[marmel75]

This all goes hand-in-hand with not knowing 1) whether she likes me, 2) whether we are actually dating and 3) that I’m really into her.

It’s a horrible feeling because at times I really want to make the moves, but I hold myself back due to uncertainty..

You never wait until you know if she likes you. She is out with you, you assume she likes you and you act on it.

It makes NO difference whether she likes you or not you are the man you do what you want to.

A woman will always be more likely to forgive you for going too far than not going far enough. They want a man not a scared little boy.

At this point you have pretty much rejected yourself, she didnt even get the chance to if she was going to or not.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

Posts: 94
No kiss on second date - I feel like I’ve completely blown it.
To be honest, I don’t even think these two meetings we’ve had have been actual dates.

First time round I invited her out for dinner. After, she suggested we go get drinks. Date started at 7:30pm and ended at 2:30am - no kiss.

Today, we went for a picnic in the mountains. I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

I did make moves in the touching department. I laid my hand on hers, I got closer to her. I know it’s raher pathetic, but I’m shy and I’m not in the game.

So I feel like I’ve completely blown it with her.

She’s either 1) Not actually interested and hasn’t been since; 2) really confused about the whole thing; 3) going to move on.

The only “good signs” from the date were: her not flinching or moving when I did touch her. And she says she’ll drive to come see me and we’ll do something.

Now you see why I say I don't have time for "dating?"

 

[Trump]

Posts: 94
No kiss on second date - I feel like I’ve completely blown it.

First time round I invited her out for dinner. After, she suggested we go get drinks. Date started at 7:30pm and ended at 2:30am - no kiss.

Dinner for first date? Too much.

First date lasts 7 HOURS? Holy cow bro. That's like going to a 3 hour hockey game. A 2 hour dinner. And then a 2 hour movie on the FIRST DATE. Is this girl like a movie actress?

Today, we went for a picnic in the mountains. I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

After 7 hours on a first date, you are still anxious with her? Come on bro. Something is not right.

So I feel like I’ve completely blown it with her.

She’s either 1) Not actually interested and hasn’t been since; 2) really confused about the whole thing; 3) going to move on.

The only “good signs” from the date were: her not flinching or moving when I did touch her. And she says she’ll drive to come see me and we’ll do something.

Her: "I'll drive to come see you and we'll do something"

You: "You are damn right we will do something. Other couples are pregnant with 10 hours of meeting each other. We have spent 12+ hours together an I haven't got a kiss. What's up with that?"

 

[RangerMIke]

Don't worry about her....
What do you want?.... you want her.... go get her.

If she doesn't want you.... okay.... fvcking forget about her.... NEXT.

Shy is you enemy...

 

[Magotrox]

It is normal to be anxious around her. Everyone here passed thought this some day in the past. You must kino her. Give her a hug. Stay close. Touch her shoulder. Touch her hand. Hold her hand. Look into her eyes. Smile. Look to her mouth. Keep going closer. Touch her hair. You are a man and you wanna kiss her. Go fot it. You said that she accepted your kino. This is a good sign!!! Go further. And if everything go wrong, don't worry. You have done your role. And you'll have another chances, with her, or with another women. She is not the only one. Fight your anxiety. You can do it. Pratice as much as you can. Be used to touch and to hug women. Be used to look them deep in the eyes. Smile. Feel the growth of your masculinity. That's the way to go.

 

[Sgthaytham]

Dinner for first date? Too much.

First date lasts 7 HOURS? Holy cow bro. That's like going to a 3 hour hockey game. A 2 hour dinner. And then a 2 hour movie on the FIRST DATE. Is this girl like a movie actress?



After 7 hours on a first date, you are still anxious with her? Come on bro. Something is not right.



Her: "I'll drive to come see you and we'll do something"

You: "You are damn right we will do something. Other couples are pregnant with 10 hours of meeting each other. We have spent 12+ hours together an I haven't got a kiss. What's up with that?"

Well initially the first date was a dinner and that’s that. But towards desserts she suggested we go get some drinks.

At 1:30 we stood around our cars talking. She asked that I text her when I got home.

 

[Igetit!]

Well initially the first date was a dinner and that’s that. But towards desserts she suggested we go get some drinks.

Well.....her interest was apparent. This was one of those instances where it seems like a guy would have to practically,almost PURPOSELY TRY to kill a girl's interest to get rid of her. This girl was jumping up and down,waving her arms,screaming at the top of her lungs,standing a HUGE,GIGANTIC FLASHING NEON SIGN....doing everything she could to make her interest known.....and you either weren't aware,oblivious to it,or did notice,but were too afraid to do anything.

But like Atom Smasher said...eventually...if that keeps happening,her interest WILL burn out. Sazc is also right.....the chick will start to think you aren't interested if you keep going out and NOT making a move. And you're going TO HAVE TO make a move...cause the girl isn't gonna do it.

At 1:30 we stood around our cars talking.

The date ended at 2:30,but for the last hour of the date,you two just stood at your cars with one another.....talking.

Much you have to learn,young SkyWalker....

Much you have to learn.

 

[Sgthaytham]

So we’ve spoken to eachother today. She wants to come over to see the work I’ve done on this place I’ve moved to. I guess you can call it the 3rd date - I will take her bowling as well.

She’s asked if I’m free this week, but I’m not because of the work I’ve got to do. So I will suggest she comes this weekend.