Something we don’t talk about

[captain55]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

 

[flowtheory]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

Sometimes it’s a lack a of maturity. I think learning and reflecting on what you did that wasn’t ideal, then forgiving yourself is how to effectively deal with things which one isn’t proud of. Introspection is important.
Life is about experiencing, and learning from those experiences. Take every incident, hood or bad, as a growth experience.

If you’ve done something which has completely hurt a person emotionally and it still causes you suffering, rectify that situation by reaching out to them, as that could help you move past it. However, it’s mostly about forgiving your own self and not punishing yourself for past choices.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

Yes, I find it a bit rich reading some of threads about the terrible behavior of bipolar women [or BD something], and then suggesting a [pimp] policy toward them that only encourages this terrible behavior in women. It leads to a vicious circle. It is both irrational and unmanly in my opinion. And then why complain?

We do complain because we are rational. But rationality presupposes a disinterestedness, where you are not partisan to one party [or sex] and look for universal solutions. This is the rationale for morality.

 

[R.U.G.]

We all live with regret. The best we can do is accept our faults and mistakes as our responsibility and try not to let it happen again. Things usually happen for a reason. However, never led a woman on, never cheated on one, but I can say I've said messed up things from time to time. Not to hurt, but for they were taken the wrong way. It is what it is and one cannot live in the past. We learn from our mistakes. Not sure if it is a lack of maturity 100% of the time. Really has more to do with emotional intelligence. Men and women look at things differently. Most men look at issues and try to find a logical solution. Most women look at an issue and just pounder and wonder until an emotional response is triggered. Goes back to the old saying, men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Both genders interpret things completely differently when it comes to relationships.

Just remember, many responses from men are due to something a woman invoked. Similar to cause and effect. The big thing though is for BOTH people to accept responsibility. That really doesn't happen much these days. They both point the finger at each other. The fact of the matter is that BOTH of them are wrong in some shape, way or form; usually.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

I'd add, as a purple piller myself, that a lot of what passes for red-pill wisdom is in fact a bastardized form of rationality. Instead of disinterestedly seeking what is universally valid for all, we look to buttress our own partisan interests [the male one]. We have become Machiavellians, where what we seek is power not the Good Life.

 

[flowtheory]

I'd add, as a purple piller myself, that a lot of what passes for red-pill wisdom is in fact a bastardized form of rationality. Instead of disinterestedly seeking what is universally valid for all, we look to buttress our own partisan interests [the male one]. We have become Machiavellians, where what we seek is power not the Good Life.

What exactly is purple pill? Simple definition.

 

[R.U.G.]

What exactly is purple pill? Simple definition.

Flow control, it's a mix of red and blue.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

What exactly is purple pill? Simple definition.

A simple definition is a challenge because I think it is inherently complex. First, if I'm not mistaken, purple happens to be a mix of red and blue. So there are elements of both so-called red and blue pills to it - think of it as the combination of the better parts of both. And it eschews the worse qualities of both - contra blue conventionality, it is rational and pursues excellence, even perhaps virtue [from vir, virile etc]. It also happens to be the color of royalty, so leans more to practical art and against revolutionary science/ ideology. Contra to the revolutionary/ hyper-individualism/ hyper-modernism of the red pill it is more classical in its outlook on life. All things in moderation would be its magnanimous motto.

 

[ohrein]

What exactly is purple pill? Simple definition.

It's essentially someone who understands the red pill, has accepted its truths, but is still trying to play a blue pill game. I think I was purple pill for a while. I thought that there could be exceptions, that a woman could love me unconditionally if I maybe played the game a certain way. I think a belief in unconditional love (unicorns or NAWALT) with red pill knowledge is purple pill.

I think you need to have an experience with a woman who you think truly loves you, who is kind and compassionate, and who fvcks you over to take that last step. I had that and I'm convinced that the red pill is truth. I think women can love you, but they can't love you unconditionally, partly because I don't know if I could love a woman unconditionally. If there's no unconditional love, then love is based on value (a mutual exchange, ideally). If love is based on value, then hypergamy and the red pill are true.

https://therationalmale.com/2015/11/10/the-purple-pill/

"In the community, The Purple Pill is a euphemism for men who’ve become Red Pill aware, but for a variety of insecurities have decided to temper the uncomfortable truths of that awareness with their previous Blue Pill hopes. The harsh, ugly truths that the nature of women, the nature of Hypergamy and the natural selection process of intersexual dynamics presents to these guys becomes too much to bear. It’s all encompassing; when a man begins to see his surroundings with a Red Pill lens the difficult truth needs for an optimistic solution to counter what would otherwise be nihilism."

I will add here that I don't think red pill awareness is nihilistic. I think it's pragmatic. Women can love you, and that love as far as human experience is concerned is real, it's just that it is limited.

 

[sosousage]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

doesnt cheating on someone make him better version of himself anyway? i mean u cheat not to hurt but for pleasure, and she learns a lesson, like you once did

 

[marmel75]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

I've never given this any thoughts. Ever

 

[RangerMIke]

Just don't lie to chicks and you will feel no guilt.

 

[wifehunter]

It's very common for people to turn into the very thing they hate.

It's a matter of focus... Focus too much on the sh!t, and your mind naturally goes in that direction.

Better to, not dwell on crap

 

[The Duke]

First off, nobody on this planet "deserves" a thing. You get what you earn. If you lack self discipline and emotional control then expect to accumulate a lot of baggage and not be part of the elite. Treat others how you want to be treated.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

First off, nobody on this planet "deserves" a thing. You get what you earn. If you lack self discipline and emotional control then expect to accumulate a lot of baggage and not be part of the elite. Treat others how you want to be treated.

What if you have work ethic and discipline but you don't understand the politics?

 

[Reykhel]

First off, nobody on this planet "deserves" a thing.

Yes, I always found this concept of "deserving" strange. "oh you didn't deserve that to happen to you" etc based on what criteria are
these levels of deserving established.

Treat others how you want to be treated.

The "golden rule"

The so called golden rule in monocultural communication is based on the idea that we are similar. Similar based culture working on the
assumption that the "other" desires the same as you. Thus treat them the same as you wish to be treated.

Dealing in any multicultural or diverse environments, which is often a factor in international business involving intercultural communication and you'll find the need to "overcome the golden rule", as they say.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Knowing the culture

 

[Spidah]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

This shyt right here is weak as fuk.

You've been manipulated out of your damn mind to be white knighting over past bitches.

Keep it moving my man. The past is the past. You think bitches are sitting around feeling guilty over all the weak beta males they used? Hell no.

 

[wolf]

Baggage goes both ways.

How do you guys deal with the pain you’ve caused women? Whether it was cheating on them, leading them on, or saying ****ed up things to them. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to me. I sit there and want a good woman but I know ive been a piece of **** with women my entire life so why do I deserve better?

Karma got me!!

 

[captain55]

This shyt right here is weak as fuk.

You've been manipulated out of your damn mind to be white knighting over past bitches.

Keep it moving my man. The past is the past. You think bitches are sitting around feeling guilty over all the weak beta males they used? Hell no.

Until your responsible for a chick having a suicide attempt because of how bad you made her feel about yourself you can’t relate