on low self esteem girls

[sazc]

Didn't mean to get this thread off topic tho

 

[guru1000]

the red pill and manospheres definition of hypergamy is a general term thats not limited to its text book definition. weve literally had pages and pages of debates on this. if i recall, you were one of the people that tried to refute it by sticking to its text book definition ie *hypergamy isnt real because it implies all women are gold diggers or will automatically jump onto the next best thing*

Not to turn this into another 10-page "discussion," but I'm glad that you get it Midnight. The problems falls that most guys don't get it, hence, the plethora of threads of men believing that the reasons of not getting a call back, not getting another date, a seemly 180-degree behavior from their girl, the lack of interest of a girl is solely attributed to the girl finding another guy who is better-looking, more status, or more money--while often--it's simply the guy not emotionally connecting with the girl and losing to another guy with a razor-sharp connection irrespective of his external value.

 

[Roober]

To the OP, it appears that you did not provide VALUE to this woman. That is why you never got in her pants. She does not sound like a damaged woman at all, and I might even argue the contrary. She almost sounds like a woman who values herself enough to guard the TRUST she gives to you. And trust me, this woman's actions illustrates that she does not TRUST you.

This is all about VALUE. Women seek value of varying degrees and of different types. Some women seek LMS (I would argue a small amount), while most seek the emotional value that @sazc suggests. The basic concepts of value applies to every social interaction. For each situation in life, you need to ask yourself, "what value do they want?" and "do I have that value(s)?"

-New job
-Big raise at work
-The HB9 at the club
-Overweight HB6
-The gym rat woman
-Are you emotionally secure?
-Do you waver in the face of conflict?
-Do you have the right amount of LMS?

I intentionally put LMS last because I believe a very small percentage of women/men will drop their current partner for someone with higher LMS IF, and this is where guys miss the mark completely, they meet her/his other values! It is so easy to pull the victim card and say "she left me for the rich club owner" or "the tatted gangster with guns" or whatever other nonsense. That is lazy and just plain silly, and I am not going to delve into that discussion here. If you need further education on the subject, here is just a small sampling of videos to provide some understanding of the detriment view:

Stefan Molyneaux -

Tony Robbins -

Just google "victim mentality"

Don't blame the guy's money, height, social circle, or whatever else excuse you can derive. Look at yourself. Which value were you not meeting? Which value are you lacking? Where do you need to improve?

Are you going to be able to keep every woman? No! You will not meet every woman's values. But by working on yourself, you can increase your emotional and psychological value to the point where hypergamy is nearly dead and women would be devastated if you leave them. Be the man that all other women dream about by providing an enormous amount of intrinsic (and extrinsic) value.

 

[chinaski]

i know now that i need to improve on assertiveness, sexual arousal, being more dominant, being more secure, more coherent and project a healthy masculine image. in the beginning hypergamy was not existent. she literally told me those things, that i take things too personal, that she wants to be lead, that she wants a man besides her, that she has to be handled, that i'm too full on myself on certain topics (work), that she tested me for my incoherence, at the same time i noticed that she started mirroring some of my good traits, in discussions for example i never lost control of myself and she did too and told me that in her previous relationships the man lost his cool and it devalued him in her eyes, yes she is younger and immature but on this aspect she was always very clear.

she literally told me what to do (last time we saw each other so nothing much i could do at that point) and is in tune with everything pua/manosphere/redpill says. she want a man of power, who can lead and is not worried by **** test. in opposite she put up extremely immature behavior that i couldn't deal with, or wasn't being able to deal with but now i know exactly what i should do to improve myself. most important of all i understand now that looking for motherly love from and showing weakness, or thinking that a woman owe you something because you had a hard life is the wrongest thing to do.

i don't know if you read the quoted part but i'll repost this to give you an idea (my posts in bold):


"She had no respect for you.
First things first, never assume it's her. Always ask yourself how you could have reacted, how you could have done better.

that's a great suggestion. every time we had a conflict i asked to myself how to react in the most mature way that i know. i've always tried to be equilibrate and tried to not get mad with her, and calmly explained what i tolerated and what not.
case in point, one evening we were together, was a great night, we were about to buy some food, we were joking and she said something insulting to me. i told her, calmly, that i didn't accepted that and that i didn't wanted a relationship where one person insult each other. i wasn't angry. she shutted down, stopped talking, cried a little and went into another room and asked for me to drive her home. she was very hurt, even when she did something not good. after a while we reconnected but for me was the first huge red flag.

From what you've said you sound downright depressed, you've put everything on her, expected her to act as you want. You aren't coming from a position of acceptance of yourself, but expecting someone else to fill a hole for you. I mean, cuddling all night? Are you 5?

i know that i have voids and i expect people to fill them. and i know that i was ****ed from the moment i attached to her (around the first month mark), that i was no longer in control of my emotions and weaker. i know that i hav to work on myself.

but at the same time i was seeing a person that in the span of a month went from "i'm a virgin, but we can do other things" -and we did- to "i don't feel to do sexual things every time we meet". i literally don't know how to express dominance outside the bed, and in this situation i felt that i was blocked from seeing this part to her

she told me that with her previous long term bf sometimes they did sexual things once IN A MONTH. she was aware of my need for intimacy, sex, bonding and connection but couldn't even understand it.
the first time we did "sex" together (anal), she wanted to be dominated and spanked. i knew right there that something wasn't right. she wanted the act to be quick. i like to make love for hours.

i make her *** lots of times and after she always told me that she enjoy the act but felt a big emptiness inside after cumming. every time.

can you imagine? one of the first night together i made her orgasm very hard. tongue, biting, fingers in the ass, licking her hips and thighs, she came after oral and fingering, she always had those violent spasm (never saw something like that and i had my share of girls, at least in bed, at least until i attach and become weak) and then..
she just want me to hug her and don't talk.
i was there, with my boner, asking myself what the **** happened. it was an appetizer for me.
multiply the experience in the span of a couple of months. sometimes we did anal, but most of the time she just did handjobs to me, and even worse, every time was me doing something to her OR she doing something to me, NEVER mutual. if the sexual encounters were more than one a week she just pushed me away, telling me that she wasn't in the mood. as far as i know her sexual frequency was always like that. nothing that worked with other girls worked with her.

this chewed my mind and my self esteem. i felt pushed away and not enough. i don't know how a sane man could endure this, even the most alpha one. blue balls everytime and worse than that i promised to myself to not being manipulative and not use jealousy so i wasn't searching for someone else.


The reason she has gone and slept with other guys is because they sexually arouse her, and you didn't. I don't mean to sound insulting, but you sound so feminine and girly, not in the slightest bit alpha.

yes, i know very well that is easy to mask as an alpha and get her ass. the problem is sustaining it. i don't know if there is someone that can "unlock" her and have a normal, healthy, intimate relationship with her.

Yes the girl is a narcissist, all girls are narcissists, because mentally they are children and can only think of self, the way she behaved reacted to YOU, she was a mirror of what you put out to her, and you didn't like what you saw.

from the start i tried to put positive things in our "relationship". no jealousy, no drama, no manipulation.
she told me literally that she expect a man that take care of everything so she can relax and be the child
that she couldn't have been in the past, since she had big problems with her dad. that in her previous relationship her ex bf was insecure too (what a surprise) and wasn't like that. she wants a men that leads her and she wants to be the child that never was, problem is i don't want a child, i want a woman. when first she showed those traits (being childish) i was speechless. it was in strong contrast with everything that i knew about her and i didn't know how to react. i mean ok, she's 22, but some things were things that i expect from a 10 years old.
could you have putted on with all those things, having in exchange a very intelligent girl, but without or very scarce sexual intimacy, attention seeking behavior (she was in contact with lots of orbiters, she always was 100% honest on this but is not a good thing), extreme insecurity that makes her fall for every compliment that she receives and a partner that doesn't understand that relationships are a two way street and she cannot be a princess that has to do absolutely nothing except for physical presence, in addiction to abandonment issues?

Heres what I see:
>You are desperately lonely
>Some young hot 22 year old comes along
>You try to make some sort of soulmate relationship
>You act desperate and beg her for sex
>She reacts by insulting you to test your manliness
>You fail the test
>She loses all attraction to you
>You push and pull for a while
>Break up

an important note: she told me that she had traumatic experiences with her dad. non about physical abuse but more of a distant and rough father. she told me about those experience and she knows that if she can overcome those issues all her relationship problems will go away at some point, and she knows that is not normal to be virgin for a 22 year old and seeking attention in much older guys. but she told me that like a couple of weeks ago. i couldn't understand why she behave in that way without those information. i thought she was an avoidant, but i think there are some big daddy issues here.

Don't worry mate, I've been there, and you need to use this to evolve, don't fall for old 'BPD' stuff, yes there are nutters out there, but most of the time we simply declare a girl BPD to escape from the truth that it was our fault as much as it was hers.

i'm at a point that i had lots of relationships more or less like this. when my weakness shows up the girls lose interest and detach. the only way i can substain a long relationship is if there is less interest in my part (and choosing an emotionally secure partner). it's like when the feelings of insecurity came out i cannot think straight and manage them because they are so strong. i know this is because my dad was an alcoholic and my mom is emotionally close, and i'm trying to get better. i just want some confirmation that i didn't did horribly wrong in this situation and everyone (except for a man with a frame of steel) could have crumbled or bailed out at some point."



add to that my somewhat missing masculine figure (my dad wasn't an alpha at all) and you have the recipe for a disaster. and that's why now i'm trying to overcome things and shape my behavior based on valid role models (the one that psychology gives you just didn't work - openness, communication, vulnerability bites you in the ass if you don't understand male and female roles and what to expect (and not) in a relationship)

 

[chinaski]

...Look at yourself. Which value were you not meeting? Which value are you lacking? Where do you need to improve?

i had a hard look on myself lately and i've come to the following conclusions.
keep in mind that this thing happened every time i attached to a girl.
i'm scared. scared of doing things alone. probably because i think that i'm not enough and i need someone to validate me.
i put too much value on the woman because i'm scared of doing things on my own. if i have a woman besides me i can push myself in some new situation and don't have fear. if i'm alone i chicken out. even something as small as visiting a museum, i can't do it alone.
and i put much emphasis on cuddling and being physically close because that's what i need. even more than sex. and that's why i behaved like a little boy in this relationship, and so far in all the other ones where i got attached.
it's being appreciated, being held, being near someones that gives me strength. the vicinity. the emotional security.
it took me years and lots of girls to arrive to this conclusion.
and because of that i act like an emotional prostitute. i'd do almost anything to have emotional security of someones that loves me.
and that's why i don't convey dominance, assertiveness, coherence, leadership in my relationship. because when i have this emotional security i'd do anything to not lose it.

i don't know where to start to overcome those issues but i know now what i do wrong.

that's why some of my exes told me literally that it was all an act and that i wasn't like they thought of me when they met me. when that part comes out it's ugly.

funny thing is that at work i convey exactly the same things that i need to convey in my romantic relationships. there aren't emotions clouding my view there.

another thing is that in the past i did some very, very difficult things regarding my health (i had cancer more than one time) with no fear and no one single tear.

why i am so weak with women at a certain point? what can i do to become more secure?

edit: i don't comment on SML because objectively i pulled girls way out of my league repeatedly and i'm a 6.5 at most (balding too). but it's always been like that. if i want a girl, i get the girl, no questions asked. the problem is when the "pua" mask fall off. inside i'm a little, scared boy and i want to resolve this thing for once.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

To the OP, it appears that you did not provide VALUE to this woman. That is why you never got in her pants. She does not sound like a damaged woman at all, and I might even argue the contrary. She almost sounds like a woman who values herself enough to guard the TRUST she gives to you. And trust me, this woman's actions illustrates that she does not TRUST you.

This is all about VALUE. Women seek value of varying degrees and of different types. Some women seek LMS (I would argue a small amount), while most seek the emotional value that @sazc suggests. The basic concepts of value applies to every social interaction. For each situation in life, you need to ask yourself, "what value do they want?" and "do I have that value(s)?"

-New job
-Big raise at work
-The HB9 at the club
-Overweight HB6
-The gym rat woman
-Are you emotionally secure?
-Do you waver in the face of conflict?
-Do you have the right amount of LMS?

I intentionally put LMS last because I believe a very small percentage of women/men will drop their current partner for someone with higher LMS IF, and this is where guys miss the mark completely, they meet her/his other values! It is so easy to pull the victim card and say "she left me for the rich club owner" or "the tatted gangster with guns" or whatever other nonsense. That is lazy and just plain silly, and I am not going to delve into that discussion here. If you need further education on the subject, here is just a small sampling of videos to provide some understanding of the detriment view:

Stefan Molyneaux -

Tony Robbins -

Just google "victim mentality"

Don't blame the guy's money, height, social circle, or whatever else excuse you can derive. Look at yourself. Which value were you not meeting? Which value are you lacking? Where do you need to improve?

Are you going to be able to keep every woman? No! You will not meet every woman's values. But by working on yourself, you can increase your emotional and psychological value to the point where hypergamy is nearly dead and women would be devastated if you leave them. Be the man that all other women dream about by providing an enormous amount of intrinsic (and extrinsic) value.

OMFG, this is on point .

 

[MrWood]

As a woman, emotional connectivity gets my panties WET. Think about that guys, words cause my body to react

this is all a man needs to know.

 

[derby1]

basically OP i had the same issues she was a selfish Narcassist however i handled it wrong id bang the living daylights out of her in bed she would return no favours whatsoever we would argue then carry on our life together

i should have calmly and covertly explained to her it would be cool if she dropped my zip once in a while then if she didnt you VANISH

basically any **** YOU VANISH the power of walking away

 

[Soflobro#2]

And Jesus man. Look i dated a woman ten years older than me too but i got sex WHENEVER I wanted, and I lived at her house ate her food, and drove her car whenever i wanted (when it was available).

No it's not healthy for me to be living like that. But i was for the most part able to do this because i acted like a man. No she wasn't fat. No I don't think she was a slvt.

Honestly sometimes i knew deep down that it wasn't going to last because she is to old and I think she could sense this.

Yo if you have to beg for sex you're in a terrible position.

Sh1t sometimes i was mad at her and i didn't want to fvck her either.

My problem is that i try to play women one on one, up close a personal and no matter how strong my frame is, it will slip a little and they've probably been waiting for it to happen because they have been tired of my sh1t for MONTHS already and once i slip a little they sh1t test me into oblivion. I guess that's what I get for living with them.

 

[Soflobro#2]

As a woman, emotional connectivity gets my panties WET. Think about that guys, words cause my body to react and make me feel close to you.

Lack of emotional connectivity eventually has me feeling ignored, unimportant, and feeling as of I can do better, find someone who will value me more.

It's true. It's almost like you can control their mind if you know how to keep them in a state of emotional flux.

 

[flowtheory]

She had no respect for you.
First things first, never assume it's her. Always ask yourself how you could have reacted, how you could have done better.
From what you've said you sound downright depressed, you've put everything on her, expected her to act as you want. You aren't coming from a position of acceptance of yourself, but expecting someone else to fill a hole for you. I mean, cuddling all night? Are you 5?

The reason she has gone and slept with other guys is because they sexually arouse her, and you didn't. I don't mean to sound insulting, but you sound so feminine and girly, not in the slightest bit alpha.

Yes the girl is a narcissist, all girls are narcissists, because mentally they are children and can only think of self, the way she behaved reacted to YOU, she was a mirror of what you put out to her, and you didn't like what you saw.

Heres what I see:
>You are desperately lonely
>Some young hot 22 year old comes along
>You try to make some sort of soulmate relationship
>You act desperate and beg her for sex
>She reacts by insulting you to test your manliness
>You fail the test
>She loses all attraction to you
>You push and pull for a while
>Break up

Don't worry mate, I've been there, and you need to use this to evolve, don't fall for old 'BPD' stuff, yes there are nutters out there, but most of the time we simply declare a girl BPD to escape from the truth that it was our fault as much as it was hers.

True.

I’ve dated a BPD woman. YOU KNOW WHEN ITS A BPD!!

How did I know. She constantly read articles on how to treat her BPD. She openly expressed she had it. Her behaviours were psychotic. No joke, I felt like I was dealing with a lunatic. She would go from super excited, to super depressed, to wanting sex, to wanting nothing to do with me, to feeling empty, to feeling fulfilled. All in the span of 3 hours. I would literally sit and watch; it was the most fascinating thing I’ve ever witnessed, however, the hardest thing my heart has been apart of.

She was reckless is every way. Rode a motorcycle extremely fast, stole in excess from people and businesses, screwed people over on purpose, lied, no condoms during sex, seeked validation outside our relationship from men, cheated, i was in a horror movie and didn’t even know it.


OP: read the book 6 pillars of self-esteem. Psychology is my jam. This is one of the most transformative books for someone who desires to grow.

 

[chinaski]

True.

I’ve dated a BPD woman. YOU KNOW WHEN ITS A BPD!!

How did I know. She constantly read articles on how to treat her BPD. She openly expressed she had it. Her behaviours were psychotic. No joke, I felt like I was dealing with a lunatic. She would go from super excited, to super depressed, to wanting sex, to wanting nothing to do with me, to feeling empty, to feeling fulfilled. All in the span of 3 hours. I would literally sit and watch; it was the most fascinating thing I’ve ever witnessed, however, the hardest thing my heart has been apart of.

She was reckless is every way. Rode a motorcycle extremely fast, stole in excess from people and businesses, screwed people over on purpose, lied, no condoms during sex, seeked validation outside our relationship from men, cheated, i was in a horror movie and didn’t even know it.


OP: read the book 6 pillars of self-esteem. Psychology is my jam. This is one of the most transformative books for someone who desires to grow.

thanks, i will. i started exercising again regularly, i'm trying to going over my comfort zone and finding new friends and activities "alone" ( in the sense that i don't need another person with me ), started re evaluating my job, i'm reading everyday and the next book is the one that you suggested me. i'm trying to be more responsible for myself everyday, not only in a relationship scenario. i'm trying to be more secure of myself and more leading and not having a role model to follow is a little hard but in the end it will work out. i'm in contact with this girl and started spinning new plates ( even if casual sex is not the core issue here, in the sense that the act of attracting a new girl and going to bed with her has less to do on being a men than handling something more long term, i mean i can act all i want but in the end is the core of myself that i need to fix ). i'm working on keeping my frame honestly some redpill articles helped me understand better how women love and that i cannot expect motherly love from a woman. i didn't have the most vague idea of what girls are really attracted to and i couldn't understand why they all leaved me when i opened up and spilled my insecurities and my fears. now it's crystal clear and i will not repeat this error in the future (the book of pook is really illuminating in this sense). it seems it will be a long road but i will become better. i guess i'm not the only one but having no role models makes things more difficult


anyway, thanks guys

 

[flowtheory]

thanks, i will. i started exercising again regularly, i'm trying to going over my comfort zone and finding new friends and activities "alone" ( in the sense that i don't need another person with me ), started re evaluating my job, i'm reading everyday and the next book is the one that you suggested me. i'm trying to be more responsible for myself everyday, not only in a relationship scenario. i'm trying to be more secure of myself and more leading and not having a role model to follow is a little hard but in the end it will work out. i'm in contact with this girl and started spinning new plates ( even if casual sex is not the core issue here, in the sense that the act of attracting a new girl and going to bed with her has less to do on being a men than handling something more long term, i mean i can act all i want but in the end is the core of myself that i need to fix ). i'm working on keeping my frame honestly some redpill articles helped me understand better how women love and that i cannot expect motherly love from a woman. i didn't have the most vague idea of what girls are really attracted to and i couldn't understand why they all leaved me when i opened up and spilled my insecurities and my fears. now it's crystal clear and i will not repeat this error in the future (the book of pook is really illuminating in this sense). it seems it will be a long road but i will become better. i guess i'm not the only one but having no role models makes things more difficult


anyway, thanks guys

Great.

And be your own role model. Extract things from various outlets which are fulfilling and guide you to the right direction. But ultimately be your own leader. Find someone on a social platform that is super ambitious and positive. Mine is Tom Bilyeu. He’s really smart and always seeking knowledge and sharing.

Visualization is a hugely powerful tool in anyone’s arsenal.
Everyday sit in a comfortable position for at least 15 minutes. Visualize your most ideal self (body, job, social circle) creating love and doing exactly what you want, imagibe how you would be at a super successful level of self.
The more often you can visualize your best self in vivid details, the more you can connect to that ideal version of yourself. And soon you will operate yourself from there. And after some time passes you will begin to manifest your desires.

If we can hold it in our heads and hearts, we can hold it in our hands.

If you ever want more book recommendations after you read pillars, PM me.

 

[Metanoia]

She's a narcissist

 

[chinaski]

Great.

And be your own role model. Extract things from various outlets which are fulfilling and guide you to the right direction. But ultimately be your own leader. Find someone on a social platform that is super ambitious and positive. Mine is Tom Bilyeu. He’s really smart and always seeking knowledge and sharing.

Visualization is a hugely powerful tool in anyone’s arsenal.
Everyday sit in a comfortable position for at least 15 minutes. Visualize your most ideal self (body, job, social circle) creating love and doing exactly what you want, imagibe how you would be at a super successful level of self.
The more often you can visualize your best self in vivid details, the more you can connect to that ideal version of yourself. And soon you will operate yourself from there. And after some time passes you will begin to manifest your desires.

If we can hold it in our heads and hearts, we can hold it in our hands.

If you ever want more book recommendations after you read pillars, PM me.

sure. i'll pm you in a few moments
just a little update. it's been only a few days since last reply but i'm keeping exercising and i'm starting to show little progress. i'm really proud of noticing the difference between workouts and the progression in resistance. i received an offer for a big job with a big pay raise and i'm in the process of moving towards the new workplace. ended the book of pook (gold) and started six pillars of self esteem and so far it's one of the best book i've ever read (so far this were the best ones: attached by amir levine, toxic parents by susan forward, psycho cybernetics by maxell waltz, the art of war by sun tzu), and i plan on keep on reading and expanding. in the evening, during the week, my time is spent with reading and exercise, i rarely consume entertainment. i'm spinning plates but no sex since i had plenty of sex before and now i want a girl that has certain character traits and i don't want to settle for less, and i'm the (slow) process of creating a new social circle to having something fun to do OUTSIDE gfs and relationships.

so..i'd say so far so good. i still am in contact with the subject of this thread but the rapport is very easygoing and fun, way less serious than before. we laugh a lot more.

honestly the BEST advice/article that i could find was rollo tomassi on women in love. that puts everything in the right perspective and gave me a huge boost on taking ownership of my life since no one else will and girls especially will not solve my problems/give me motherly love.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

sure. i'll pm you in a few moments
just a little update. it's been only a few days since last reply but i'm keeping exercising and i'm starting to show little progress. i'm really proud of noticing the difference between workouts and the progression in resistance. i received an offer for a big job with a big pay raise and i'm in the process of moving towards the new workplace. ended the book of pook (gold) and started six pillars of self esteem and so far it's one of the best book i've ever read (so far this were the best ones: attached by amir levine, toxic parents by susan forward, psycho cybernetics by maxell waltz, the art of war by sun tzu), and i plan on keep on reading and expanding. in the evening, during the week, my time is spent with reading and exercise, i rarely consume entertainment. i'm spinning plates but no sex since i had plenty of sex before and now i want a girl that has certain character traits and i don't want to settle for less, and i'm the (slow) process of creating a new social circle to having something fun to do OUTSIDE gfs and relationships.

so..i'd say so far so good. i still am in contact with the subject of this thread but the rapport is very easygoing and fun, way less serious than before. we laugh a lot more.

honestly the BEST advice/article that i could find was rollo tomassi on women in love. that puts everything in the right perspective and gave me a huge boost on taking ownership of my life since no one else will and girls especially will not solve my problems/give me motherly love.

Dude the funny thing about life is the chilling on females till you meet one of a checklist is feminine. It fvcks up our sex vibe. If your just taking a disciplined Break from all women to refocus yourself fine. Have a small amount of fun in your budget because it's the grease for our wheels.

 

[flowtheory]

sure. i'll pm you in a few moments
just a little update. it's been only a few days since last reply but i'm keeping exercising and i'm starting to show little progress. i'm really proud of noticing the difference between workouts and the progression in resistance. i received an offer for a big job with a big pay raise and i'm in the process of moving towards the new workplace. ended the book of pook (gold) and started six pillars of self esteem and so far it's one of the best book i've ever read (so far this were the best ones: attached by amir levine, toxic parents by susan forward, psycho cybernetics by maxell waltz, the art of war by sun tzu), and i plan on keep on reading and expanding. in the evening, during the week, my time is spent with reading and exercise, i rarely consume entertainment. i'm spinning plates but no sex since i had plenty of sex before and now i want a girl that has certain character traits and i don't want to settle for less, and i'm the (slow) process of creating a new social circle to having something fun to do OUTSIDE gfs and relationships.

so..i'd say so far so good. i still am in contact with the subject of this thread but the rapport is very easygoing and fun, way less serious than before. we laugh a lot more.

honestly the BEST advice/article that i could find was rollo tomassi on women in love. that puts everything in the right perspective and gave me a huge boost on taking ownership of my life since no one else will and girls especially will not solve my problems/give me motherly love.

Awesome man. Good to hear! I’m actually reading psycho-cybernetics right now

 

[chinaski]

i want to share something that helped me getting my priorities straight in this period of time. i think all of those talk are very useful:

 

[chinaski]

a small update. i'm not initiating anymore and the girl object of this thread writes me everyday. she started calling too.text ratio is like three to one. i signed the contract at the new job and its a very cool place (like very very cool) and she initiates all the time now especially after hearing the news. what the heck? i'm polite and funny but i don't search her anymore yet she somehow is running after me or so it seems. i did nothing: just living my life and i didn't even did all the things that i have in plan to do.

so is this the way it should always be?

 

[MrWood]

so is this the way it should always be?

yeh