Moved in with GF this week used to be daily but lost interested in sex already!?

[Jamie12345]

HI All,

I had been living with my gf for four weeks and i officially moved in this week..

We used to have sex all the time all around the house at least once a day and she used to wear sexy outfits and underwear etc but in the past week she doesnt seem to put the effort into sex anymore?

We still have sex but its always me initiating she never wears sexy underwear or outfits etc i said to her that she was been different about having sex but she insist she wasnt. The next time we i tried to have sex with her she refused and said you will only say im different anyway but i got my way later that day.

I really dont know how to approach this any advice?

In the past i only had to squeeze her leg in bed in the morning to get her going but we havnt had morning sex in ages she says shes tired or stressed etc.

When we dont have sex it makes me feel insecure because she never talks about her emotions and it makes me feel she is been distant

I want her to put on sexy outfits and underwear again, im hoping i can save this as she was only doing this last week.

I dont know how to bring it up with her and how to get her to put more effort in.

How can i approach this!

Please help!

 

[El Payaso]

It's only gonna get worse. You should start pulling your interest level back.

 

[Jamie12345]

i really cant be have sex once a week type of guy

 

[JonnyD123]

Jesus this post wreaks of neediness.

Look man, women need to FEEL something. The dating and courtship never ends. You’re thinking like a man right now.

“In the past I only had to squeeze her leg.” Yea, because her interest was high.

Bringing this up is useless to her, she will only resent you for it. You’re the man, take the lead. Set dates, take her out. Tell her to wear that sexy dress you love so much. Don’t tell her where you’re going. Have fun. Do SOMETHING. Get her going. Get her excited to be with you, THEN go back to your place and watch what happens.

In point, just because you live together does NOT mean you can get sex on demand. That’s not how women work, and that’s where a lot of men get it wrong. Obviously this is different for a random plate or FWB, but if it’s a live-in ltr, this is how you need to handle it. Just make sure she’s contributing as well.

In closing, make sure you’re working on your purpose, and this stuff will not distract you as much. Hope this helps.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Show interest in someone else. Or even better, show that someone else is interested in you.

 

[Jamie12345]

Jesus this post wreaks of neediness.

Look man, women need to FEEL something. The dating and courtship never ends. You’re thinking like a man right now.

“In the past I only had to squeeze her leg.” Yea, because her interest was high.

Bringing this up is useless to her, she will only resent you for it. You’re the man, take the lead. Set dates, take her out. Tell her to wear that sexy dress you love so much. Don’t tell her where you’re going. Have fun. Do SOMETHING. Get her going. Get her excited to be with you, THEN go back to your place and watch what happens.

In point, just because you live together does NOT mean you can get sex on demand. That’s not how women work, and that’s where a lot of men get it wrong. Obviously this is different for a random plate or FWB, but if it’s a live-in ltr, this is how you need to handle it. Just make sure she’s contributing as well.

In closing, make sure you’re working on your purpose, and this stuff will not distract you as much. Hope this helps.

I did last night we went out i paid for drinks and the dinner then back to hers, we had to watch her tv program for an hour before bed then she was just all floppy on the bed and wasn't really interested felt like she didnt want to she was just doing it to please me.

She used to go upstairs get changed into something sexy then literally jump on me while i was sat on the sofa. Last week she spent the entire evening cooking etc in her lingerie teasing me.

I dont know how i can rescue this without been direct with her, i dont want one day to lead to two days to lead to a week without sex cause then it becomes a habit. its also her time of the month soon so i want this resolved before then

 

[Spaz]

It's only gonna get worse. You should start pulling your interest level back.

Show interest in someone else. Or even better, show that someone else is interested in you.

I'd do this if I were you ^^

 

[RichardTheFrog]

I just read the title, but...

Yea that's what happens. I spent a week with this girl last year, and even after several days it gets old. By the time we were about to part ways, she would ask to give me head and I'd be like... "Nah, I don't want to have to clean up."

It gets old just like anything.

Yet in between times, especially if you go long times without it, you will begin to think about it a lot and place more importance on it.

 

[marmel75]

Thats how things work dude...nobody is going to have sex every single day of their life...what fantasy land do you live in?

 

[Jamie12345]

Weve been having sex every single day apart from the time of the month week for months!

 

[SgtSplacker]

Honeymoon phase doesn't last forever. You need to emotionally feed her for sex now.

 

[cola]

In the rare event I'm dating someone exclusively I tell them my sex demands upfront.

Need it twice a week unless your on the rag or unusually busy. If you can't comply I start sniffing skirts.

 

[greatsnake]

Most likely that the honeymoon phase is over. It only gets worse if you don't really like this girl and you just moved in because the sex was off the charts...

 

[flowtheory]

I don’t get how it went from insanely high passion and lots of sex to virtually none overnight.

I would bank on it’s something you’re doing, your attitude, how you’re treating her, or your expectation of how she should be.

Maybe she sees how you are around the house and is completely turned off by you? Take responsibility that YOU’RE not doing something right that maybe you were before.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I don’t get how it went from insanely high passion and lots of sex to virtually none overnight.

I would bank on it’s something you’re doing, your attitude, how you’re treating her, or your expectation of how she should be.

Maybe she sees how you are around the house and is completely turned off by you? Take responsibility that YOU’RE not doing something right that maybe you were before.

Eff her. She prrob feels she got him roped in and doesnt have to put out .

 

[flowtheory]

Eff her. She prrob feels she got him roped in and doesnt have to put out .

Then that’s not a relationship anyone should willingly be in.

Also. Rookie mistake moving in to HER place. You’re living on her turf!

 

[MrAddiction]

Then that’s not a relationship anyone should willingly be in.

Also. Rookie mistake moving in to HER place. You’re living on her turf!

The mistake was to move in at all.

https://therationalmale.com/2011/10/06/shacking-up/

One might have a Look at this too....
https://therationalmale.com/2014/07/23/case-study-low-expectations/comment-page-2/

 

[flowtheory]

The mistake was to move in at all.

No. Let’s get serious for a minute. At some point that is inevitable, especially if you wish to get married and have kids (or not have kids).

AT SOME POINT you will move in with a woman. And probably should, so you can see her living habits before you pop the question (if you believe in marriage). All this doesn’t mean we have to lose our balls in the process though and give over to her ways because you’re afraid of losing her.
A relationship is a gift we give ourselves and this can not be forgotten!!

I would LOVE to stay in my wicked spacious bahelor pad for the rest of my days and see the woman of my dreams only 3-4 times a week while pursuing and growing in my chosen passions. However I have to wake up from that dream that that is actually feasible. Because it’s not. At some point she would just leave because her needs for deeper companionship wouldn’t be met. And a successful relationship is a two way street.

Take his situation for instance... maybe he’s doing everything right and NOTHING has changed in their dynamic except for the lack of sex. By moving in with this particular woman he is seeing and experiencing that lack of sex is going to be the new dynamic. So to me, this would be a sign to pack my sh!t and head for greener and moister pastures! Because maybe she really doesn’t love him and was just using sex to obtain something which she lacks. But that’s a whole other psychodynamic I won’t get in to.

Had he popped the question then moved in and realized it was forever drought season 365 days a year... oh man! Moving in with a woman isn’t so bad. That perspective has many holes in it.
Is there less sex overall? Sure. That’s natural because you’ve obtained each other in a sense. However there’s still ways to create the same amount of sex somehow it just take a little more than squeezing her thigh in the morning haha. We just have to figure that out, as the plain of the game has changed. Still a game though.

For every new level there’s a different devil. So figure it out. Because that woman is still as horny as ever! Old tricks don’t work on dogs who have already figured out that old trick.

 

[MrAddiction]

if you wish to get married

No need to discuss anything further. Good luck!

 

[wifehunter]

You're putting way too much into this. Got anything else, besides women?