Attention: here is what happens with women nowadays

[17 shots]

Don't throw away a plate you took the time to write a poem to. That's a waste of your creativity.... the point of doing stuff like that is so that you'll always have a little piece of her heart. You did that.... I love my hos unconditionally

 

[lizardking82]

Pack of wolves in here, wow. Be a little empathetic. Yes he is overselling his behavior but who hasn't done that.

Lots of guys here never fail to do that. It's like they're Mr. Perfect and they're just waiting for you to make a mistake LOL

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Lots of guys here never fail to do that. It's like they're Mr. Perfect and they're just waiting for you to make a mistake LOL

Part of it is because they can't stand to see that someone isn't broken over this (the same thing happened to me when I said dealing with a BPD was a easy a **** hahaha).

Moral of the story from this thread, **** happens. Especially with women. And you gotta be prepared for it. Or make yourself strong enough and/or tough enough to where you don't even need to prepared for it because it wouldn't affect you anyway.

 

[lizardking82]

UPDATE: Just had a superb time and sex with a cute, sexy and hot at least 8, possibly 9 that I met first time today and another 9+ is incoming in the next couple of days.

The girl is back, crying and begging, telling she made a mistake and that now she doesn't wanna go with that guy LOL

How things can change

 

[Milano]

Reading all this, its quite clear that you are more invested than she is, lizardking. It made me think about so many times when I also have ended up in these situations where oneitis is creeping up on us and suddenly we have emotions for someone. When we "really" like a woman, we start portraying the other person as something she is not, we forget the facts that are in front of us. Facts that are our strengths.

If someone really likes you, wants to be with you, respects you and you also respect yourself (which should be in your interest because if you dont make decisions based on self love she will notice and cannot submit fully) the game wont be this bad and there wont be as much drama, at least NOBODY wants that.

My first girlfriend told me she was depressed and needed some time off. Got a text a week later, "I wasnt completely honest with you". Oh really? "I was out traveling". Turns out, she was in NY with a 40 year old with money. Happens all the time, its just that they often dont brag about it on instagram. NEVER be surprised about what ANY woman says or does. Often the cuties are the worst

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Reading all this, its quite clear that you are more invested than she is, lizardking. It made me think about so many times when I also have ended up in these situations where oneitis is creeping up on us and suddenly we have emotions for someone. When we "really" like a woman, we start portraying the other person as something she is not, we forget the facts that are in front of us. Facts that are our strengths.

If someone really likes you, wants to be with you, respects you and you also respect yourself (which should be in your interest because if you dont make decisions based on self love she will notice and cannot submit fully) the game wont be this bad and there wont be as much drama, at least NOBODY wants that.

My first girlfriend told me she was depressed and needed some time off. Got a text a week later, "I wasnt completely honest with you". Oh really? "I was out traveling". Turns out, she was in NY with a 40 year old with money. Happens all the time, its just that they often dont brag about it on instagram. NEVER be surprised about what ANY woman says or does. Often the cuties are the worst

It's hard for her to respect you because she knows you don't have any real reason to . But your being stupid behind her.

 

[Macaframalama]

Pack of wolves in here, wow. Be a little empathetic. Yes he is overselling his behavior but who hasn't done that.

Not sure what good coddling egos would do here, considering it seems OP's ego is too big to acknowledge his error and learn from them anyway. The thread shouldn't even exist in the first place, as there was no commitment. OP tried to manipulate her emotions and got burnt in the process and respect is more than likely lost on both sides, even if she is crawling back as he now claims. OP felt entitled, saw that it doesn't work that way irl when she started getting hers, flipped 180 and went full AFC with the 21 questions and poetry when he felt her slipping and then creates a butthurt blanket statement post telling us all we should "confront wierd changes in behavior", when it's nobody's business who's fvcking who in an uncommitted relationship. It's like highschool all over again. Sorry, not sorry can't ride with that.

 

[lizardking82]

Not sure what good coddling egos would do here, considering it seems OP's ego is too big to acknowledge his error and learn from them anyway. The thread shouldn't even exist in the first place, as there was no commitment. OP tried to manipulate her emotions and got burnt in the process and respect is more than likely lost on both sides, even if she is crawling back as he now claims. OP felt entitled, saw that it doesn't work that way irl when she started getting hers, flipped 180 and went full AFC with the 21 questions and poetry when he felt her slipping and then creates a butthurt blanket statement post telling us all we should "confront wierd changes in behavior", when it's nobody's business who's fvcking who in an uncommitted relationship. It's like highschool all over again. Sorry, not sorry can't ride with that.

I acknowledged my errors a long time ago, even joked about some of them. When you talk about ego, I feel like laughing, you are the type of guy who will keep replying just to prove yourself right LOL

I wrote the poetry cause I write poetry. Writing poetries is AFC now? That is some stupid mentality. It's called art, something you and your big muscles have not much of an idea, I take it. LOL, trynna be all alpha here, everything is AFC, poems are AFC, art is AFC, just cause some guy on some forum says it.

I asked her the questions that night cause I wanted her to get that sh1t out and she did. I wasn;t being the AFC guy who demands to know where his girl was. I knew where she was and who she was with, wanted her to say it and she did.

So ready to attack, so ready to put down. Grow up, you can give an opinion without being a d1ck all the time. And I can tell you're in this for the negativity cause I just said I had fun with a chick and am about to have with another and she's wanting back now and I don't really care much anymore. A normal person would say "Hey man, good for you, keep it up". You, on the other hand, continue on your battles for the right. Whatever with you

 

[Macaframalama]

you are the type of guy who will keep replying just to prove yourself right LOL

Dude, idc about proving myself right. I already know that I am right and my opinion is the only opinion that matters to me at the end of the day anyways.

I wrote the poetry cause I write poetry. Writing poetries is AFC now? That is some stupid mentality. It's called art, something you and your big muscles have not much of an idea, I take it. LOL, trynna be all alpha here, everything is AFC, poems are AFC, art is AFC, just cause some guy on some forum says it.

I never said writing poetry was AFC. I said writing poetry to sway a woman's decision, after you have fvcked up by playing little kiddy headgames with her and see she's got one foot out.

I asked her the questions that night cause I wanted her to get that sh1t out and she did. I wasn;t being the AFC guy who demands to know where his girl was. I knew where she was and who she was with, wanted her to say it and she did.

To what point? You said yourself "I was around several other women" that she was likely clueless about.

So ready to attack, so ready to put down. Grow up, you can give an opinion without being a d1ck all the time. And I can tell you're in this for the negativity

You're wrong about me being in it for the negativity. I won't deny I can be a d!ck. That's just how I repond to fvckery and it's exactly just this type of chit that muddies up the game. You've got to pay to play, DGAF who you are.

I had fun with a chick and am about to have with another and she's wanting back now and I don't really care much anymore.

Hey man, good for you, keep it up!

 

[lizardking82]

Dude, idc about proving myself right. I already know that I am right and my opinion is the only opinion that matters to me at the end of the day anyways.

I never said writing poetry was AFC. I said writing poetry to sway a woman's decision, after you have fvcked up by playing little kiddy headgames with her and see she's got one foot out.

To what point? You said yourself "I was around several other women" that she was likely clueless about.

You're wrong about me being in it for the negativity. I won't deny I can be a d!ck. That's just how I repond to fvckery. You've got to pay to play, DGAF who you are.

Hey man, good for you, keep it up!

I didn't write the poetry to sway her decision, for fack's sake. I wrote the poetry cause I felt like writing it, she loved it, that's it.

 

[R.U.G.]

I wrote about a story with a girl here, a curly one that I went to see in another town and then I sent her a message mistakenly that I was sending to another girl...and from there on it was ups and downs and ups and downs, but I kept her on since I liked her overall and I thought MEH, let's see, maybe some things are not so bumpy over time and they get better.

15th of February I have my ACL reconstruction done, 3 weeks I am off back in my home town cause I need people to take care of me. In the mean time, she's behaving fairly alright but is giving me some sh1t cause I told her I was with another girl (I was with several ones actually LOL) in the time period we were supposedly not together. Now this girl is back in her home town and take into account I have not met her in person since beginning of 2018. She started working as a manager for a new disco club that opened up in the town. Last month or so, things really seemed to have settled down and I started feeling positively about her, first time in a long time. However, last two weeks some weird signals came my way. This is a girl that would call every morniing to say good morning and would call every night to say good night and last two weeks, she began being "sloppy" on this aspect, wrote and called more rarely bla bla bla and my shark senses smelled this sh1t 1 MILLION miles away. Gave it a few days and then I confronted her about, but in a playful way. She said nothing is wrong. Good, so the testing continues.

At around that time, one night, at 3:30 AM, she calls me up and tells me the owner of the club, a guy about 40 years old, rich, has held her hostage (literally) at his place, has kissed her against her will and so on and so on. I thought to myself "OK, she should leave the job now.." Guess what, she doesn't. So this makes me more doubtful right away, but still, I am cool about it and since I don't think all the time what bad intentions people have on me, I let it go. She keeps working there.

She continues with the same behaviour and a couple of days later, I confront her about it again, this time much more seriously. She still denies it. OK, may the games continue, but this time I go like "meh, whatever, she's probably not doing anything, you're just being too paranoid" so I drop the topic off. This last week that went by, we only talked on the phone like twice and the messages where rare. Last night I felt like writing some poetry involving her and so I write it and I post it and she sees it and replies to me happy, crying from happiness bla bla bla. This sh1t, less than 12 hours ago LOL so today afternoon, I notice that our last call was 5 days ago, so I call her to talk a bit. She's busy. I call her again a couple of hours later, she hangs up on me and replies with a short text "Baby, I am busy, will call you a bit later". Right here and then, in that exact moment, my GUT FEELING tells me sth is not right here. I go home and at around midnight, she writes. She has, meanwhile, posted pics of her riding a horse on Instagram. I ask her where was she all the time and she says "Why you askin' like this?". Right here and then I know this is a pattern of people who feel guilty, to answer a normal question like "where were you?" with a defensive question back. Then I ask her "who were you with?" and she says "with the guys at work" and asks me back "Common, why you being like this?" I ask her "Were you with the guys at work or with the owner of the club?" She says "He was there, too." She asks me "Common, why you being like this about sth that doesn't matter?" And I tell her it does matter cause you're acting strange the last two weeks now and it is because you either lost interest or someone else is involved so better speak up now or I am gonna make up my own mind about it. She then finally LOL tells me that someone else is involved and you guys guessed who, right? The owner! The f0cking owner who held her hostage for 4 hours is the guy she has apparently, behind my back has decided to give a chance to. She probably has Stockholm syndrome or sth like that, can't see any other option here.

You see guys, she even tried to make it seem like nothing had happened. She was like "Common, ;et's not talk about this, how was your day?" haahhahahahaha amazing.

This is why I want every new member here and every beginner to know to ALWAYS be careful with women and always be doubtful about sudden and weird changes in behaviour. Confront her about or leave it at that, it's your choice. I go with the first option, but you see, you never know who you're dealing with. They are capable of anything that you hold sacred to fock it up. They have no honor, no morals, everything is discussable. Enjoy relationships as they come and go, but always beware that her ultimate desire is to come to a place where her leaving crushes you to the ground and if it doesn't, she will never leave you. She might leave you, but never in her mind and soul and she will come back if you stood like a man and told her whatever the fack you wanted to say in the moment she tested your boundaries with the ultimate test. Trust your gut feeling, it is almost never wrong.

Seems that you were doing the chasing, not her. That's your 1st problem. Your 2nd problem was the way you reacted. You are supposed to have her do the chasing and when something goes awry, you brush it off. No emotional response.

 

[Roober]

Not sure what good coddling egos would do here, considering it seems OP's ego is too big to acknowledge his error and learn from them anyway. The thread shouldn't even exist in the first place, as there was no commitment. OP tried to manipulate her emotions and got burnt in the process and respect is more than likely lost on both sides, even if she is crawling back as he now claims. OP felt entitled, saw that it doesn't work that way irl when she started getting hers, flipped 180 and went full AFC with the 21 questions and poetry when he felt her slipping and then creates a butthurt blanket statement post telling us all we should "confront wierd changes in behavior", when it's nobody's business who's fvcking who in an uncommitted relationship. It's like highschool all over again. Sorry, not sorry can't ride with that.

I have to agree with mac on this one. You exhibited several low value behaviors. This is almost an exact replica of the emotional manipulation feminists complain about.

You didn't want to buy the cow, but took the milk for free (for a year). The cow was looking for a new owner. He took the milk, made his intentions very clear that he wasn't buying. Now she holds onto hope your still there...

"Unspoken path to a relationship", what the fvck does that even mean? Sounds like high schoolers that are incapable of proper communication, so they supplicate in order to avoid confrontation.

I think you really need to self-reflect on this one and identify your actions as the source of the problem. Look at your following response to mac, you are exhibiting a tremendous amount of low value behaviors. Your actions are indicative of your mindset, regardless of what you type from this point forward. I would call that "showing your hand"

 

[lizardking82]

I have to agree with mac on this one. You exhibited several low value behaviors. This is almost an exact replica of the emotional manipulation feminists complain about.

You didn't want to buy the cow, but took the milk for free (for a year). The cow was looking for a new owner. He took the milk, made his intentions very clear that he wasn't buying. Now she holds onto hope your still there...

"Unspoken path to a relationship", what the fvck does that even mean? Sounds like high schoolers that are incapable of proper communication, so they supplicate in order to avoid confrontation.

I think you really need to self-reflect on this one and identify your actions as the source of the problem. Look at your following response to mac, you are exhibiting a tremendous amount of low value behaviors. Your actions are indicative of your mindset, regardless of what you type from this point forward. I would call that "showing your hand"

I got it, man, I got it. There have been all sorts of perspectives pointed out in much less personally offensive ways from mature people than you or some other guys around here. I read them all, soaked in the necessary information, added it to the ones I already got from my own gut feeling.

This thread was more of a rant about how women handle these situation, how they hide things for about a month then speak up and then come back, typical behaviour some guys here would maybe profit sth from finding out with a detailed, real life example. It's amazing how you or some other guys are so quick to just jump onto anything in such a critiquing way. You sometimes remind of my grandfather or father who act exactly the same way if you tell them about a problem, just douchy when you can choose not to be douchy and actually give out your thoughts on this matter in a non-offensive way.

I got the info I wanted, didn't write anymore in the thread. Last night that I did write, it was not to oppose what was said, it was to update the thread with good news that "hey, things can get better in one day if you take it positively and up the chin", no matter what.

 

[guru1000]

I wrote about a story with a girl here, a curly one that I went to see in another town and then I sent her a message mistakenly that I was sending to another girl...and from there on it was ups and downs and ups and downs, but I kept her on since I liked her overall and I thought MEH, let's see, maybe some things are not so bumpy over time and they get better.

15th of February I have my ACL reconstruction done, 3 weeks I am off back in my home town cause I need people to take care of me. In the mean time, she's behaving fairly alright but is giving me some sh1t cause I told her I was with another girl (I was with several ones actually LOL) in the time period we were supposedly not together. Now this girl is back in her home town and take into account I have not met her in person since beginning of 2018. She started working as a manager for a new disco club that opened up in the town. Last month or so, things really seemed to have settled down and I started feeling positively about her, first time in a long time. However, last two weeks some weird signals came my way. This is a girl that would call every morniing to say good morning and would call every night to say good night and last two weeks, she began being "sloppy" on this aspect, wrote and called more rarely bla bla bla and my shark senses smelled this sh1t 1 MILLION miles away. Gave it a few days and then I confronted her about, but in a playful way. She said nothing is wrong. Good, so the testing continues.

At around that time, one night, at 3:30 AM, she calls me up and tells me the owner of the club, a guy about 40 years old, rich, has held her hostage (literally) at his place, has kissed her against her will and so on and so on. I thought to myself "OK, she should leave the job now.." Guess what, she doesn't. So this makes me more doubtful right away, but still, I am cool about it and since I don't think all the time what bad intentions people have on me, I let it go. She keeps working there.

She continues with the same behaviour and a couple of days later, I confront her about it again, this time much more seriously. She still denies it. OK, may the games continue, but this time I go like "meh, whatever, she's probably not doing anything, you're just being too paranoid" so I drop the topic off. This last week that went by, we only talked on the phone like twice and the messages where rare. Last night I felt like writing some poetry involving her and so I write it and I post it and she sees it and replies to me happy, crying from happiness bla bla bla. This sh1t, less than 12 hours ago LOL so today afternoon, I notice that our last call was 5 days ago, so I call her to talk a bit. She's busy. I call her again a couple of hours later, she hangs up on me and replies with a short text "Baby, I am busy, will call you a bit later". Right here and then, in that exact moment, my GUT FEELING tells me sth is not right here. I go home and at around midnight, she writes. She has, meanwhile, posted pics of her riding a horse on Instagram. I ask her where was she all the time and she says "Why you askin' like this?". Right here and then I know this is a pattern of people who feel guilty, to answer a normal question like "where were you?" with a defensive question back. Then I ask her "who were you with?" and she says "with the guys at work" and asks me back "Common, why you being like this?" I ask her "Were you with the guys at work or with the owner of the club?" She says "He was there, too." She asks me "Common, why you being like this about sth that doesn't matter?" And I tell her it does matter cause you're acting strange the last two weeks now and it is because you either lost interest or someone else is involved so better speak up now or I am gonna make up my own mind about it. She then finally LOL tells me that someone else is involved and you guys guessed who, right? The owner! The f0cking owner who held her hostage for 4 hours is the guy she has apparently, behind my back has decided to give a chance to. She probably has Stockholm syndrome or sth like that, can't see any other option here.

You see guys, she even tried to make it seem like nothing had happened. She was like "Common, ;et's not talk about this, how was your day?" haahhahahahaha amazing.

This is why I want every new member here and every beginner to know to ALWAYS be careful with women and always be doubtful about sudden and weird changes in behaviour. Confront her about or leave it at that, it's your choice. I go with the first option, but you see, you never know who you're dealing with. They are capable of anything that you hold sacred to fock it up. They have no honor, no morals, everything is discussable. Enjoy relationships as they come and go, but always beware that her ultimate desire is to come to a place where her leaving crushes you to the ground and if it doesn't, she will never leave you. She might leave you, but never in her mind and soul and she will come back if you stood like a man and told her whatever the fack you wanted to say in the moment she tested your boundaries with the ultimate test. Trust your gut feeling, it is almost never wrong.

So many things wrong with OP’s thinking and behavior in the opening post, I decline to comment. I’m just surprised how OP has been here 16 months and learned nothing.

OP, you should really lose your ego investments in your thinking, and learn some humility. Your “game” is horrible and quite sickening to the reader. Your approach implicitly states, “I know what I’m doing, so thanks, but no thanks.” Truth is you know nothing and can use much help. Acknowledging you know nothing and asking for help with humility is a good start and will take you a long way.

 

[lizardking82]

So many things wrong with OP’s thinking and behavior in the opening post, I decline to comment. I’m just surprised how OP has been here 16 months and learned nothing.

OP, you should really lose your ego investments in your thinking, and learn some humility. Your “game” is horrible and quite sickening to the reader. Your approach implicitly states, “I know what I’m doing, so thanks, but no thanks.” Truth is you know nothing and can use much help. Acknowledging you know nothing and asking for help with humility is a good start and will take you a long way.

Thanks, master. I will decline your help respectfully and will continue with my "horrible" game that is probably totally accidentally getting me girls.

 

[Skyline]

About the 'hostage' situation...

It wasn't real dude.

Not too long I had a girl claim that she was almost raped by someone she knew for 10 years. After about 5 or 6 questions, I realized that her story didn't add up.

Turns out, my gut was right. She had actually invited him and one of my friends, whom didn't know that I was friends with, over and she was flirting with him the entire time. They ended up watching a movie together in her room for the remainder of that night that they all got together.

I really don't care that she slept with some dude. I really don't.

My ex girlfriend had her ex alone in her room twice- I didn't care. All I care about is honesty. My ex told me that she had her ex in room- nod on her for honesty.

Had she had slept with her ex, really on him because she still came back to me at the end of the night. There were 0 changes in behavior.

But this girl, and yours, blatantly lied about it. Lying is literally the worst thing you can possibly due towards me because I will find out. Especially lying about sexual assault/rape.

Think about that.

She slept with a dude and immediately claimed rape/sexual assault because she regretted it. Whether it's an attempt for her to play the victim role and supplicate her, it doesn't matter. In my book, she's a liar and should be treated as such.

Do you really want to talk to someone who falsely accused someone of rape/sexual assault?

If you care about her then you'll call her out on it. If you don't, you tell her to fvck off and then delete/block her on everything. Or just do the latter.

And you shouldn't ever use the 'where were you/who were you with?' Lines... it really does sound controlling and even if she told you, what're you going to do? Beat him up? It's pointless.

 

[lizardking82]

About the 'hostage' situation...

It wasn't real dude.

Not too long I had a girl claim that she was almost raped by someone she knew for 10 years. After about 5 or 6 questions, I realized that her story didn't add up.

Turns out, my gut was right. She had actually invited him and one of my friends, whom didn't know that I was friends with, over and she was flirting with him the entire time. They ended up watching a movie together in her room for the remainder of that night that they all got together.

I really don't care that she slept with some dude. I really don't.

My ex girlfriend had her ex alone in her room twice- I didn't care. All I care about is honesty. My ex told me that she had her ex in room- nod on her for honesty.

Had she had slept with her ex, really on him because she still came back to me at the end of the night. There were 0 changes in behavior.

But this girl, and yours, blatantly lied about it. Lying is literally the worst thing you can possibly due towards me because I will find out. Especially lying about sexual assault/rape.

Think about that.

She slept with a dude and immediately claimed rape/sexual assault because she regretted it. Whether it's an attempt for her to play the victim role and supplicate her, it doesn't matter. In my book, she's a liar and should be treated as such.

Do you really want to talk to someone who falsely accused someone of rape/sexual assault?

If you care about her then you'll call her out on it. If you don't, you tell her to fvck off and then delete/block her on everything. Or just do the latter.

And you shouldn't ever use the 'where were you/who were you with?' Lines... it really does sound controlling and even if she told you, what're you going to do? Beat him up? It's pointless.

This is what facked with my mind, too. Before, she accepted to creating fights so I could end the whole thing because she "could not do it". Women are like children, when you abuse them LOL they keep staying and can't leave, but since they got this idea in their mind that they "should leave", they try and provoke the whole thing happening and from that moment, their responsability level goes down to -, not even 0.

I can't know for sure what happened that night between me and him, but if I went from my gut, I would say that she did not fack this guy, she just found a guy that absolutely would "die" for her. This girl has a history of guys absolutely losing their mind after her. She is quite gorgeous, about 1,75, curly haired, sweet face, a very cute ass bla bla bla and she has explicitly told me stories where guys have tried to leave their girlfriends for her.

I took this girl and told her she has to earn being my girlfriend. Some guys here going off on the "you didn't buy the cow so the cow went looking for a new owner" do not get this sh1t. It absolutely facked with her mind that for the first time in her life, she was being asked to deserve the role she had always been offered to and that facked her mind. She went "meh, deserve it? Man, I deserve it" and tried every dirty little trick in the female book of tricks to make me let her go. I didn't and that drove her even more insane so now she done tried the last and ultimate thing that is supposed to kill a man's ego and make him let go of a woman: she mentioned or involved another person.

In my books, she didn't fack him and never will. She despises guys who beg to her and this nigga begged to her. Is that true? I don't know, but knowing what she spoke before about him, I think it's true. To me, whether she facked him or not, whether she was held hostage or not doesn't matter. I take it for granted that she was held hostage and that she did in fact fack this guy. End of story. Her loss, I got better things to do in my life.

 

[fastlife]

This is what facked with my mind, too. Before, she accepted to creating fights so I could end the whole thing because she "could not do it". Women are like children, when you abuse them LOL they keep staying and can't leave, but since they got this idea in their mind that they "should leave", they try and provoke the whole thing happening and from that moment, their responsability level goes down to -, not even 0.

Low self-esteem women.* Dominance =/= Abuse

I can't know for sure what happened that night between me and him, but if I went from my gut, I would say that she did not fack this guy, she just found a guy that absolutely would "die" for her. This girl has a history of guys absolutely losing their mind after her. She is quite gorgeous, about 1,75, curly haired, sweet face, a very cute ass bla bla bla and she has explicitly told me stories where guys have tried to leave their girlfriends for her.

That's not your gut, bro. Let me translate this for you: The projection of my idealized women that I attributed to this girl wouldn't have slept with this guy.

Btw, major red flag when girls leave behind a string of exes still pining over them. Emotionally mature breakups don't leave a desperate need for closure or leave avenues open for supplying validation.

I took this girl and told her she has to earn being my girlfriend. Some guys here going off on the "you didn't buy the cow so the cow went looking for a new owner" do not get this sh1t. It absolutely facked with her mind that for the first time in her life, she was being asked to deserve the role she had always been offered to and that facked her mind. She went "meh, deserve it? Man, I deserve it" and tried every dirty little trick in the female book of tricks to make me let her go. I didn't and that drove her even more insane so now she done tried the last and ultimate thing that is supposed to kill a man's ego and make him let go of a woman: she mentioned or involved another person.

In my books, she didn't fack him and never will. She despises guys who beg to her and this nigga begged to her. Is that true? I don't know, but knowing what she spoke before about him, I think it's true. To me, whether she facked him or not, whether she was held hostage or not doesn't matter. I take it for granted that she was held hostage and that she did in fact fack this guy. End of story. Her loss, I got better things to do in my life.

A little naive here, bro. You are still trying to preserve an idealized projection of this girl. Why? For your ego. You had her fast-tracked to the girlfriend path. If she just fvcks some old club manager, what does that say about you? Does is devalidate the attention she showed you? Who's the prize here?

This type of situation sucks. Especially the first handful of times you experience it. Trust me, been there, done that--and I spend years wrestling with cognitive dissonance, instead of just accepting the reality of the situation. You seem more solid than that, but the more you try to preserve your idealized projection, the more you try to rationalize her behavior, the more this situation--and all sorts of hypothetical what-ifs--will play on your mind.

And let me let you in on a common trick in the playbook of female manipulation: If a girl frequently complains about a guy or talks sh1t about him, or tries overly hard to disqualify him as a potential sexual competitor, she has/is/will/or wants to fvck him. By the time you start to here about any guy in this capacity, if sexual fidelity is important to you, then it's time to end it on the spot.

 

[lizardking82]

Low self-esteem women.* Dominance =/= Abuse



That's not your gut, bro. Let me translate this for you: The projection of my idealized women that I attributed to this girl wouldn't have slept with this guy.

Btw, major red flag when girls leave behind a string of exes still pining over them. Emotionally mature breakups don't leave a desperate need for closure or leave avenues open for supplying validation.



A little naive here, bro. You are still trying to preserve an idealized projection of this girl. Why? For your ego. You had her fast-tracked to the girlfriend path. If she just fvcks some old club manager, what does that say about you? Does is devalidate the attention she showed you? Who's the prize here?

This type of situation sucks. Especially the first handful of times you experience it. Trust me, been there, done that--and I spend years wrestling with cognitive dissonance, instead of just accepting the reality of the situation. You seem more solid than that, but the more you try to preserve your idealized projection, the more you try to rationalize her behavior, the more this situation--and all sorts of hypothetical what-ifs--will play on your mind.

And let me let you in on a common trick in the playbook of female manipulation: If a girl frequently complains about a guy or talks sh1t about him, or tries overly hard to disqualify him as a potential sexual competitor, she has/is/will/or wants to fvck him. By the time you start to here about any guy in this capacity, if sexual fidelity is important to you, then it's time to end it on the spot.

Thank you. You're right about it all, almost all.

One of the reasons I got mad is that I got mad at myself for not having maybe acted earlier on this situation when I sniffed it.

She didn't talk badly about them at all LOL she just skimmed through them verbally, mentioning they all still try to reach her.

You think it should devalidate the attention she showed throughout and she keeps on showing to this day (couple of hours ago)?

 

[fastlife]

One of the reasons I got mad is that I got mad at myself for not having maybe acted earlier on this situation when I sniffed it.

Remember that feeling. Internalize it. Your gut is there for a reason--if you're not naturally insecure, listen to it. It feels sh1tty when you don't

She didn't talk badly about them at all LOL she just skimmed through them verbally, mentioning they all still try to reach her.

Those are orbiters. She doesn't need to disqualify them as sexual competitors. I'm talking about her boss. She obviously sh1t talked him to you to give you the impression of him you currently hold onto. Chances are he's a pretty solid guy--not a creep at all--definitely solid enough to pull her. Not very many 40 y/o men have that kind of sexual agency.

Also she works night life. These situations aren't at all uncommon in those industries. Plenty of really cool, fun girls, but not exactly the type--we're talking generalizations, obviously--you want to hitch your feelings to.

You think it should devalidate the attention she showed throughout and she keeps on showing to this day (couple of hours ago)?

Devalidation can only exist after you've attached validation to an external object. Attention from a girl--any girl--at any time--says very little about your worth as a person. It's too whimsical a thing to base your self-worth on. Ideally, you want to feel the same way about yourself when a girl throws a drink in your face as you do when she's shaking from orgasms or blowing up your phone or whatever. That takes a lot of work & it is a practice-able skill.

Take this girl for instance. Rationally, are you a better/worse person now that she's banging her boss than you were when she was banging you? Do your friends or family think any less of you? Look down at your hands. Not missing any fingers. Look in the mirror. Still the same guy. The people who love you still love you. No girl can change those fundamentals. You are still you--so what I'm getting at is it doesn't matter whether a girl likes you or not. NOTHING CHANGES. Everything else is ego.