BPD ex girlfriend

051AV

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Your whole world starts to fall apart when they are in your life. When you dont know anything about Cluster B's, it truly is a traumatic experience. You are basically at war when you are dating/married to one. When its you over you need to be debriefed on what happened. That is 1# thing to help in recovery is knowing how they work, what everything "really" meant and what happened. Once you learn all about them they become so easy read. You end up looking back and seeing everything for what it really was.

I learned more about life, myself, psychology and so many other things in 1 year than I did in 10. After I learned all about them I decided to help others who were in a relationship with one, or recovering. I spent a good 8 months helping people all over the world, made new friends and all. But in the end I had to stop as it was taking a toll on my own well being. What you dont hear about is how many commit suicide will with them, after a break up or die from a stroke/heart attack from all the stress they cause. I've read a lot of horrific stories from people I helped. These types of people commit a silent type of murder/abuse with no bruises, no cuts or marks, its all emotional and stress related. Gas lighting is very dangerous to someone who doesn't know wtf is going on.

You are lucky to have her out of the life and you are alive and well. A lot of men waste their entire lives chasing their ex narc/bpd because they dont have that one thing that thing that changes everything..knowledge on how they work. I guess for me the hardest thing Im still struggling with in recovery is extreme shame in myself for not leaving her for good the many times I tried. I always got sucked back into her toxic vortex. Knowing how she got pleasure seeing me in pain, how I always went back to her after being treated like dog chit. She must have looked at me like I was the dumbest man in the world. But its ok, I learned a very valuable life changing lesson, and I know karma will strike down on her.



If you dont have any kids with her then why are you continuing to give her supply? Block all forms of contact asap even if you have to change your #. Wake up man, STOP answering her and stay no contact!

The 1# thing against these demons is to NEVER show a reaction to their bs mind games. No reaction hurts them, the more you do it, the faster they will leave you alone. When you no longer work like they need you to, you become worthless to them. Its all about control. No control= you're worthless
Being with her was an eye opener not something I would ever want to repeat again she was the toughest relationship I've ever been it, full of drama, fights, mind fvcks. Since I've been with her I can sense damaged women just talking to them I seem to dig for the right info that gives me clues if these women I encounter are fvcked up or not. I know my exes ex she just dumped will be trying to claw her back, she almost killed him once with a heart attack.

I'm the guy that searches for answers I've always been that way, after things settled down and I got my head back in order I needed to know what the fvck happened. When somebody mentioned BPD I started looking into it more I read more I learned it all pointed to her, she wouldn't ever tell me what mental health issues she suffered from I know the medication she is on. She's a high functioning BPD I would imagine that makes her a more dangerous one because people will look at her and say there is nothing wrong with her and believe what she says in the smear campaign.

I know now I was really mind fvcking her, she would go right mental when I played with the control and how much she had, especially at work, the thing I liked doing the most was taking credit for things she did, honestly I didn't do it on purpose but management would give me credit for it. She would get so upset then it would turn anger then emotional saying why I'm I hurting her. There were things she did at her job she wasn't good at the other staff said you have to tell her.... I dreaded that, it would always turn into I'm hurting her. Dealing with a BPD you are truly dealing with an adult that still is a child. The evil side came out of her she started collecting evidence and stuff she could use against me she wanted to see me terminated. She was the angel and I was the abuser, saying I was really abusive and she was scared to work with me I was going to hurt her. In the end of the mess she caused, I was terminated for "abusing her", they believed every last word she said, they realized she's fvcking nuts 6 months after I left. In the end I won she ruined her reputation, I didn't crash and burn like she hoped I went back to the construction trades been working steady ever since. Three years later she's no farther ahead than she was before she doesn't have full time employment. I own my own place now something she hoped and dreamed off doing its not going to happen. All her hopes and dreams she told me she wanted, hasn't happened. She's in the rear view mirror on the road of life, what ever, don't need her dragging me down, I have positive attitude again, life is worth living, my future is bright, best of all I'm happy.
 

stovepipe

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Being with her was an eye opener not something I would ever want to repeat again she was the toughest relationship I've ever been it, full of drama, fights, mind fvcks. Since I've been with her I can sense damaged women just talking to them I seem to dig for the right info that gives me clues if these women I encounter are fvcked up or not. I know my exes ex she just dumped will be trying to claw her back, she almost killed him once with a heart attack.

I'm the guy that searches for answers I've always been that way, after things settled down and I got my head back in order I needed to know what the fvck happened. When somebody mentioned BPD I started looking into it more I read more I learned it all pointed to her, she wouldn't ever tell me what mental health issues she suffered from I know the medication she is on. She's a high functioning BPD I would imagine that makes her a more dangerous one because people will look at her and say there is nothing wrong with her and believe what she says in the smear campaign.

I know now I was really mind fvcking her, she would go right mental when I played with the control and how much she had, especially at work, the thing I liked doing the most was taking credit for things she did, honestly I didn't do it on purpose but management would give me credit for it. She would get so upset then it would turn anger then emotional saying why I'm I hurting her. There were things she did at her job she wasn't good at the other staff said you have to tell her.... I dreaded that, it would always turn into I'm hurting her. Dealing with a BPD you are truly dealing with an adult that still is a child. The evil side came out of her she started collecting evidence and stuff she could use against me she wanted to see me terminated. She was the angel and I was the abuser, saying I was really abusive and she was scared to work with me I was going to hurt her. In the end of the mess she caused, I was terminated for "abusing her", they believed every last word she said, they realized she's fvcking nuts 6 months after I left. In the end I won she ruined her reputation, I didn't crash and burn like she hoped I went back to the construction trades been working steady ever since. Three years later she's no farther ahead than she was before she doesn't have full time employment. I own my own place now something she hoped and dreamed off doing its not going to happen. All her hopes and dreams she told me she wanted, hasn't happened. She's in the rear view mirror on the road of life, what ever, don't need her dragging me down, I have positive attitude again, life is worth living, my future is bright, best of all I'm happy.
You are lucky that someone pointed you in the bpd direction. So many guys go years in pain not knowing what their ex was nor what really happened. The evil part of them wants to see you in pain, wants to know you are still hurting, that you still want them. They are empty evil souls who go around stealing parts of good people to full their empty cup. Trying to live a happy successful life is the best revenge. There is a reason you attracted her, but now you know better than to repeat the same painful cycle. Death by heart attack while with them has happens more than people realize.

We are living in a time where mental disorders are starting to slowly surface and show just how damaging and destructive they can be. More and more are speaking out on their experience. Youtube 5 years ago didn't have a lot of vids on the topic, now there is tons! A lot of victims have also become therapists and psychotherapists as a result of being in one of these toxic relationships. If you can put religion aside, this is one of many good vids on the topic.

 

051AV

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You are lucky that someone pointed you in the bpd direction. So many guys go years in pain not knowing what their ex was nor what really happened. The evil part of them wants to see you in pain, wants to know you are still hurting, that you still want them. They are empty evil souls who go around stealing parts of good people to full their empty cup. Trying to live a happy successful life is the best revenge. There is a reason you attracted her, but now you know better than to repeat the same painful cycle. Death by heart attack while with them has happens more than people realize.

We are living in a time where mental disorders are starting to slowly surface and show just how damaging and destructive they can be. More and more are speaking out on their experience. Youtube 5 years ago didn't have a lot of vids on the topic, now there is tons! A lot of victims have also become therapists and psychotherapists as a result of being in one of these toxic relationships. If you can put religion aside, this is one of many good vids on the topic.

What attracted me to her, she was smart and had the looks to go with it, she's a Scorpio communication between us we spoke with no words we just knew what each other wanted. People that would watch us silent communicate would say how did you know? they were puzzled it just the way it was with her and I, both intuitive people.

I've always been a successful person, I strive to do the best I can do, working in the job I was working in I was burning out but I was successful I got sh*t done I kept things organized. She is a jealous person she would be jealous of my success she would have to brag about her achievements she would try rub it in my face as much as she could, my success just showed it self it would p*ss her off. She used to beak off so, put your money where your mouth is, I put her in the line of fire at work, she couldn't handle it, get upset and emotional, she didn't want me to do that again. Trying to one up me or trying to run me down trying to make herself feel better, the harder she tried to beat me more I shined.

Lol she loves seeing people in pain, she's a little sadistic b*tch, I seen her gloat about people she's hurt, bragged about seeing her ex boyfriend before me, suffer and his health declined. In the end she wanted to see me in pain she hated me so much. I had to let her know I was back working and my life was going great I knew it would p*ss her off, I'm pretty sure she's been trying to find out how I'm doing. There was days I looked at her and she looked empty like she wasn't there. Her dog is her best friend she says her dog come first over anybody else, I figure if her dog dies she will try commit suicide, she claimed to make a few attempts, she seen a shrink on a regular basis, she also on meds which helped but she was scary when the meds wore off. Nope I will not repeat the past that's for damn sure, more I learn and read about BPD, I get the shivers, what I read is what she is.
 

Rapport101

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I talked to her a bit and hung out with her and what I’ve noticed is she just takes. Contributes absolutely nothing. And the thing is that I just don’t feel **** about it anymore. I don’t care. When we had broken up she triggered all sorts of negative feelings in me and I went berserk. Now I’ve just quit caring, obviously i care enough to still post on the subject, but I don’t give a **** what she does. She’s like “oh can I get a ride here...can you buy me that...can you do this...can you do that”. I just said to her yeah no problem, I love being a taxi that doesn’t get paid, i also make a great bank account for you since I’m such a beta phag. Lol. She responds “oh yea - great way to make me feel good before work”.

So I hung out with her twice. And second time she starts demanding to see my phone. I told her no. Then she accuses me of hiding things. I’m like, we’re not together. Besides nothing good has ever come from me letting her look at my phone. Last time she flipped out over Facebook messages between myself and a girl that I had dated two years before I even knew the bpd chick. She’s nuts. If she doesn’t find anything then she flips out because she says that I’m deleting messages. Yet I looked in her phone and she had deletes all over the place, you could just tell. She has like ten orbiters. Just annoying bunch of bs with these people.
 

stovepipe

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They make you go crazy after a while. Just reading the posts you can see the confusion and anger. Totally normal behavior after being involved. These people feed off making one angry, mad, confused, obsessed, ect. One important thing to know is all their power resides in their lies. If you knew before hand what they were would you have still have dated them? Answers probably know.

That's how they get by in life, lying about who they are. Once you start to uncover their bs they will start to distance themselves and eventually they leave you alone as their covers been blown.
 
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051AV

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They make you go crazy after a while. Just reading the posts you can see the confusion and anger. Totally normal behavior after being involved. These people feed off making one angry, mad, confused, obsessed, ect. One important thing to know is all their power resides in their lies. If you knew before hand what they were would you have still have dated them? Answers probably know.

That's how they get by in life, lying about who they are. Once you start to uncover their bs they will start to distance themselves and eventually they leave you alone as their covers been blown.
LOL I uncovered my ex in a short period of time, I would always confront her on her lies, I would say to her why are you lying to me. When she started seeing the other guy she told me he knows enough about me. I would enjoy catching her in lies, I don't think she liked that too much lol.
 

stovepipe

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I talked to her a bit and hung out with her and what I’ve noticed is she just takes. Contributes absolutely nothing. And the thing is that I just don’t feel **** about it anymore. I don’t care. When we had broken up she triggered all sorts of negative feelings in me and I went berserk. Now I’ve just quit caring, obviously i care enough to still post on the subject, but I don’t give a **** what she does. She’s like “oh can I get a ride here...can you buy me that...can you do this...can you do that”. I just said to her yeah no problem, I love being a taxi that doesn’t get paid, i also make a great bank account for you since I’m such a beta phag. Lol. She responds “oh yea - great way to make me feel good before work”.

So I hung out with her twice. And second time she starts demanding to see my phone. I told her no. Then she accuses me of hiding things. I’m like, we’re not together. Besides nothing good has ever come from me letting her look at my phone. Last time she flipped out over Facebook messages between myself and a girl that I had dated two years before I even knew the bpd chick. She’s nuts. If she doesn’t find anything then she flips out because she says that I’m deleting messages. Yet I looked in her phone and she had deletes all over the place, you could just tell. She has like ten orbiters. Just annoying bunch of bs with these people.
Why in the world are you still talking to this broad when all she does is cause drama? She's still trying to control you when you arent even together. I totally understand the strong hold these sloots can have, but you are fully aware of what she is and how much nonsense shes putting you through. Either cut the cord and move on, or stay and lose the little respect you have for yourself. Look at the anger and confusion in your post. Wake the phuk up! Block all forms of contact and move on with your life. Don't even entertain telling her you want out. You don't tell trash it's trash do you? Nope, you just throw it out and move on. With these people, silence is the best option.


LOL I uncovered my ex in a short period of time, I would always confront her on her lies, I would say to her why are you lying to me. When she started seeing the other guy she told me he knows enough about me. I would enjoy catching her in lies, I don't think she liked that too much lol.
They hate being called out on their bs. Most of them will still try and gaslight you no matter how much evidence you have on their lies. Biggest cowards out there who cant admit guilt. The more you call them out, the more they start to resent you. To them, you are not working like you should. You shouldn't be calling them out, you should keep your mouth shut and believe their lies. When their mouths are moving they're lying.
 

051AV

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Why in the world are you still talking to this broad when all she does is cause drama? She's still trying to control you when you arent even together. I totally understand the strong hold these sloots can have, but you are fully aware of what she is and how much nonsense shes putting you through. Either cut the cord and move on, or stay and lose the little respect you have for yourself. Look at the anger and confusion in your post. Wake the phuk up! Block all forms of contact and move on with your life. Don't even entertain telling her you want out. You don't tell trash it's trash do you? Nope, you just throw it out and move on. With these people, silence is the best option.




They hate being called out on their bs. Most of them will still try and gaslight you no matter how much evidence you have on their lies. Biggest cowards out there who cant admit guilt. The more you call them out, the more they start to resent you. To them, you are not working like you should. You shouldn't be calling them out, you should keep your mouth shut and believe their lies. When their mouths are moving they're lying.
She didn't like being called out on her lies, I also rubbed her faults in her face when she p*ssed me off she really hated that, they sure don't like hearing the truth. I didn't jump to her finger snaps like my replacement who kissed the ground she walks on. She said to me I made her ill if she was around me or seen me.
 

stovepipe

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She didn't like being called out on her lies, I also rubbed her faults in her face when she p*ssed me off she really hated that, they sure don't like hearing the truth. I didn't jump to her finger snaps like my replacement who kissed the ground she walks on. She said to me I made her ill if she was around me or seen me.
They hate being called out. They know they're pieces chit, but they trick their minds to think otherwise. Once you start to constantly call them out, they become so filled with anger towards you. That's why their relationships with the ultra weak last the longest. The weak man would be too afraid to lose them, so they keep their mouth shut. The reason she felt ill around you is due to you triggering her that she is a piece of chit.

Some of them cry in private after being called out on their behavior/lies. They will never let anyone see that weak side of them. Deep down they are cowards and know it, but have to portray to the world they're strong loving individuals. I'm sure your ex has flashbacks of you calling her out on her bs and probably cries at times. That's part of the hell they live in. Telling the truth isn't in their vocabulary, their whole lives revolve around lies.

Looking back I can recall more times than I can count how her story changed, I was just so brainwashed to realize it. She told so many lies that she started to forget what she previously told me about a certain situations. Liars have to constantly keep track of their lies which is a hell in and of it self and eventually they slip. Thats when the mask starts to come off and you see them for who they really.....The biggest piece of chit you ever met!
 

Rapport101

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I was drunk one night and literally sat this ***** down and started a police style interrogation with her (in my mind it was hilarious). So I was writing everything she said down and going back to it, re-asking questions and poking holes in her story. She started to get sooo pissed off while I was doing this it was pretty funny. Everything she said there was a lie, I know it was, she knows it was, but she’ll never admit it. I’m feeling pretty emotionally disconnected from her, and she just got fired from her job. Her life (that I helped her create while we were together) is down the toilet. Now she’s back to her true self. A little hood rat ***** waste of time. It all started as a lie, and it ended as a lie; the person she pretended to be doesn’t even exist. I was talking to her because i was used to talking to her. It was hard to maintain relationships with other women when I was with her because of her jealousy. So I talked to her, banged her a couple times, she ****ed her whole life, while I just bought a new BMW. So am feeling pretty good. Lol. Plus I’ve got several good options now in terms of women. Life is feeling pretty amazing now.
 
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Billtx49

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They hate being called out.

The reason she felt ill around you is due to you triggering her that she is a piece of chit.
They will never let anyone see that weak side of them.
It causes a small degree of introspection in them and they do not like what they see…
Then their inward anger gets transferred to you. They live in a different reality than most people. There’s no way to win with this type of woman.
 
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051AV

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They hate being called out. They know they're pieces chit, but they trick their minds to think otherwise. Once you start to constantly call them out, they become so filled with anger towards you. That's why their relationships with the ultra weak last the longest. The weak man would be too afraid to lose them, so they keep their mouth shut. The reason she felt ill around you is due to you triggering her that she is a piece of chit.

Some of them cry in private after being called out on their behavior/lies. They will never let anyone see that weak side of them. Deep down they are cowards and know it, but have to portray to the world they're strong loving individuals. I'm sure your ex has flashbacks of you calling her out on her bs and probably cries at times. That's part of the hell they live in. Telling the truth isn't in their vocabulary, their whole lives revolve around lies.

Looking back I can recall more times than I can count how her story changed, I was just so brainwashed to realize it. She told so many lies that she started to forget what she previously told me about a certain situations. Liars have to constantly keep track of their lies which is a hell in and of it self and eventually they slip. Thats when the mask starts to come off and you see them for who they really.....The biggest piece of chit you ever met!
Yep she would go running off to another room when she would get mad at me I would go find her and she would be crying ask her if she was okay give her a hug and leave her alone she would come back. My replacement did what she wanted he never talked back to her, did everything she wanted, he was a yes man at work took it up the a** at work he would say sh*t if his mouth was full. She liked that she could manipulate him, she knew he is weak and very controllable unlike myself who she couldn't control.

She also learned not to lie to me, I would leave evidence for her to find, then I would say why did you lie, she would give me the guilty look and say sorry I didn't mean too. The stories she told to her co-workers it would make me laugh because I knew it wasn't true, she did lie a lot she claimed she didn't, she knew better to do it around me. I loved watching her tremble with nervousness when I caught her lying. The stories she told her co-workers made me laugh it was full of lies and mistruths, there was different variations of the story.

Her mask slipped off early in our relationship, I seen the ugly side of her quickly, the second day we met she say's I'm on meds I'm not that scary. It was scary how she could take the mask on and off like flicking a light switch. She could be sitting in the office with me alone being her empty soulless self soon as somebody walked in the mask went on the cheerful bubbly self appeared, once the person left the mask would come off. She liked being alone or with me, she could be herself she didn't have to hide behind her mask which took a lot of energy. The only thing the others seen was her moodiness, nobody seen her with her mask off only I seen that, when her and I were alone I never seen the mask on. Soon as she became comfortable with me the mask went back on, I seen her true self 100% of the time when we were alone. The cheerful bubbly girl that everybody else seen I rarely seen only if we were out with other people.

I doubt she will ever come back to find me, she knows where to find me lol, the last time I seen her face to face she was nervous like the day her and I met. I recently learned why she turned nuts on me, probably not a wise idea to tell a BPD to fvck off :eek: I was tired of her BS she was causing me excess drama in my life :mad: and we were only friends at that point. She wanted to see me pay for what I did turned my life upside down the mess she caused I was in a gun fight with a butter knife, I'm lucky I didn't end up in jail. Things turned into a big blur I had so much going on I lost control of what was going on. I walked out banged up and bruised I kicked ass but I didn't win the fight, today, three years later my life is back where it should be, I'm successful again, living a healthy normal life.

Do I hate her? no..... she has an illness she can't control, she knows it, she's on medication that will eventually take her life, antidepressant medications are taking the toll on her body. Her hair falls out in clumps, she's got next to no libido the thought of sex turns her off, she has trouble maintaining her weight. I watched what the meds did to her, she just started some new medication when I met her, she was suffering from anorexia, her previous BF threw her out of the house they co-owned. In the end she is damaged goods there is no way of fixing her, her parent's fvcked up big time raising their little girl 33 years ago. She is a high functioning BPD, she's constantly working on getting a higher education, trying to be successful. You would never know that she is a BPD from looking at her. BPD women are truly a child in a adult body, dealing with her was like dealing with a child.
 

Billtx49

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BPD women are truly a child in a adult body, dealing with her was like dealing with a child.
Yep, mine once explained to me all the ways women are better than men as if it made sense…
Looking back, I now see it as a pathetic attempt at manipulation and to give her own ego a false lift…
 
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051AV

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Yep, mine once explained to me all the ways women are better than men as if it made sense…
Looking back, I now see it as a pathetic attempt at manipulation and to give her own ego a false lift…
I used to boost my exe's ego on purpose it would make her head swell up like a beach ball, over did it one day and she got mad at me said I wasn't being sincere lol. I said to her have I ever lied to you she's no.
 
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