Strict Parents... Am I in the Wrong Here?

[nicksaiz65]

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents, and I think they’re great people, but I’m starting to think back and I disagree with how I was raised.

My parents are the conservative Christian type. Like I literally wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music when I was a kid, I could only listen to Gospel and Classical. This growth turned me into a super nerd, and that was good for academics but I got no girls.

Eventually I found the DJ site and that helped undo it and I saw what I was doing wrong. I got me a little girlfriend. In college, thanks to influences and joining a frat, I’ve become way less uptight and a lot more social.

So I just recently turned 21. I’m home over break. I have a long night of homework ahead of me, so I’m thinking “let me go get a beer so I can drink it and unwind while I do my work.”

And my parents nearly have a freaking heart attack. They don’t let me drink it, and I get a huge lecture on alcoholism. Over one little beer, and I’m legal! They act like I brought home a whole handle.

I just feel like my parents shouldn’t baby and shelter me like this. It stunted me socially and I had to catch up. Still not there yet. I mean I wouldn’t have it any other way, cause I might’ve never found the DJ Bible or Pook and this website.

But am I in the wrong here? I just feel like my parents overreact and try to shelter me too much, which hinders me way more than it helps me. Thoughts below would be great.

 

[wifehunter]

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents, and I think they’re great people, but I’m starting to think back and I disagree with how I was raised.

My parents are the conservative Christian type. Like I literally wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music when I was a kid, I could only listen to Gospel and Classical. This growth turned me into a super nerd, and that was good for academics but I got no girls.

Eventually I found the DJ site and that helped undo it and I saw what I was doing wrong. I got me a little girlfriend. In college, thanks to influences and joining a frat, I’ve become way less uptight and a lot more social.

So I just recently turned 21. I’m home over break. I have a long night of homework ahead of me, so I’m thinking “let me go get a beer so I can drink it and unwind while I do my work.”

And my parents nearly have a freaking heart attack. They don’t let me drink it, and I get a huge lecture on alcoholism. Over one little beer, and I’m legal! They act like I brought home a whole handle.

I just feel like my parents shouldn’t baby and shelter me like this. It stunted me socially and I had to catch up. Still not there yet. I mean I wouldn’t have it any other way, cause I might’ve never found the DJ Bible or Pook and this website.

But am I in the wrong here? I just feel like my parents overreact and try to shelter me too much, which hinders me way more than it helps me. Thoughts below would be great.

Yes, my parents were the same way. Needless to say, they are out of my life for good.

Most Christians, are not real Christians. Real Christians show LOVE. Fake Christians emphasize rules over Love.

Failing to recognize you as an adult, is not showing Love. If I you feel you are not in a position to make your own decisions, I would sit them down. If they fail to listen or keep on this path, I would leave ASAP. It will only get worse from here.

"You shall know them by their fruits."

 

[Billtx49]

Teaching your kids to live right, be moral, make good choices in their lives, doesn’t require prohibition. That only causes rebellion or selfeducating children…

 

[wifehunter]

Teaching your kids to live right, be moral, make good choices in their lives, doesn’t require prohibition. That only causes rebellion…

Nailed it!

 

[Spaz]

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents, and I think they’re great people, but I’m starting to think back and I disagree with how I was raised.

My parents are the conservative Christian type. Like I literally wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music when I was a kid, I could only listen to Gospel and Classical. This growth turned me into a super nerd, and that was good for academics but I got no girls.

Eventually I found the DJ site and that helped undo it and I saw what I was doing wrong. I got me a little girlfriend. In college, thanks to influences and joining a frat, I’ve become way less uptight and a lot more social.

So I just recently turned 21. I’m home over break. I have a long night of homework ahead of me, so I’m thinking “let me go get a beer so I can drink it and unwind while I do my work.”

And my parents nearly have a freaking heart attack. They don’t let me drink it, and I get a huge lecture on alcoholism. Over one little beer, and I’m legal! They act like I brought home a whole handle.

I just feel like my parents shouldn’t baby and shelter me like this. It stunted me socially and I had to catch up. Still not there yet. I mean I wouldn’t have it any other way, cause I might’ve never found the DJ Bible or Pook and this website.

But am I in the wrong here? I just feel like my parents overreact and try to shelter me too much, which hinders me way more than it helps me. Thoughts below would be great.

Ur parents mean well.

They shelter you as they feel you need protecting whilst they do not realise it's actually counter productive.

Take what they have thought you to heart and that would be your core beliefs.

Your core beliefs -> frame -> methodology = result.

Now as you have read DJ bible/Pook, your frame starts to build, it's an never ending process, time passes and your frame get more solid.

Whatever you have added into your frame it in turn will affect your methodology (way you do things) which in turn affect your desired results in life.

 

[Billtx49]

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents, and I think they’re great people, but I’m starting to think back and I disagree with how I was raised.

My parents are the conservative Christian type. Like I literally wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music when I was a kid, I could only listen to Gospel and Classical. This growth turned me into a super nerd, and that was good for academics but I got no girls.

Eventually I found the DJ site and that helped undo it and I saw what I was doing wrong. I got me a little girlfriend. In college, thanks to influences and joining a frat, I’ve become way less uptight and a lot more social.

So I just recently turned 21. I’m home over break. I have a long night of homework ahead of me, so I’m thinking “let me go get a beer so I can drink it and unwind while I do my work.”

And my parents nearly have a freaking heart attack. They don’t let me drink it, and I get a huge lecture on alcoholism. Over one little beer, and I’m legal! They act like I brought home a whole handle.

I just feel like my parents shouldn’t baby and shelter me like this. It stunted me socially and I had to catch up. Still not there yet. I mean I wouldn’t have it any other way, cause I might’ve never found the DJ Bible or Pook and this website.

But am I in the wrong here? I just feel like my parents overreact and try to shelter me too much, which hinders me way more than it helps me. Thoughts below would be great.

The two easiest lays in my life were with young girls that came from prohibitive parents, if that tells you anything about what the results can be from that type of environment.

 

[nicksaiz65]

The two easiest lays in my life were with young girls that came from prohibitive parents, if that tells you anything about what the results can be of that type of environment.

Same man. I know that when I first went to college, my first thought was “I’m going to do absolutely everything I can to un-shelter myself.” Ironically, my grades would have been better had I experienced more before college and been less sheltered.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Pointless to create a conflict with your parents, especially now that you live on your own.

Bullsh1t them into thinking everything is ok and that they have no reason to be concerned, keep their support in terms of money and safety while you go your own way.

Regarding the beer, lie to them and tell them that you were concerned about not being good enough for them, let them feel useful showing christian love and go back to your way.

You're still 21, plenty of stuff for you to do, keep means and tools while you focus on real challenges...not trying to make blue pilled bigots upgrade to 2018.

 

[Bible_Belt]

If alcohol was evil, Jesus would have turned the water into grape juice, and not wine.

 

[sosousage]

Let me start off by saying that I love my parents, and I think they’re great people, but I’m starting to think back and I disagree with how I was raised.

My parents are the conservative Christian type. Like I literally wasn’t allowed to listen to rap music when I was a kid, I could only listen to Gospel and Classical. This growth turned me into a super nerd, and that was good for academics but I got no girls.

Eventually I found the DJ site and that helped undo it and I saw what I was doing wrong. I got me a little girlfriend. In college, thanks to influences and joining a frat, I’ve become way less uptight and a lot more social.

So I just recently turned 21. I’m home over break. I have a long night of homework ahead of me, so I’m thinking “let me go get a beer so I can drink it and unwind while I do my work.”

And my parents nearly have a freaking heart attack. They don’t let me drink it, and I get a huge lecture on alcoholism. Over one little beer, and I’m legal! They act like I brought home a whole handle.

I just feel like my parents shouldn’t baby and shelter me like this. It stunted me socially and I had to catch up. Still not there yet. I mean I wouldn’t have it any other way, cause I might’ve never found the DJ Bible or Pook and this website.

But am I in the wrong here? I just feel like my parents overreact and try to shelter me too much, which hinders me way more than it helps me. Thoughts below would be great.

you dont want to know what i was doing at your age lol

your parents do great job in making you antisocial and in limiting you. tell a girl on date that you are 21 and never had a beer and she will ruuuuuuuuuuuun

 

[El Payaso]

No, you are not wrong. For most children who were raised in a conservative, uptight home. There usually comes a time when most of them rebel against their parents rules. Smart parents usually realize when their children have grown up and they stop being so overprotective.

Smart parents realize that all you can do is talk to your kids at that point and give them advice. If the kid was brought up well, they will carry their upbringing with them wherever they go.

Unless I'm missing something where alcohol is an absolute no go in your religion then this might be a sticking point for them.

 

[zekko]

If alcohol was evil, Jesus would have turned the water into grape juice, and not wine.

I never liked the "religious" types who would claim that wine in biblical times was actually grape juice - that Jesus turned water into grape juice.
The problem with that is, "wine" is translated from the Greek word oinos. And in other parts of the Bible, there are people getting drunk on oinos. So it's plainly obvious it isn't grape juice.

Some other people would argue that dancing is immoral, and that certain types of heavy rock beats are sinful. There's simply no Biblical basis for this.

Anyway, if you're living with your parents when you're not at school, it would probably be best to just respect their rules while you are there, and do what you want when you are back at school (within reason, of course). And I would try to get out of there and into my own place as soon as possible once I graduated.

 

[Bible_Belt]

On a similar note, Genesis said that God looked down on *all* of His creation, and it was good...which would include the demon wacky weed known as Mary Jane. The exact recipe for the "anointing oils" used in the Bible is not known. It is quite possible that cannabis was in the recipe. The oils were heated, which would make the thc psychoactive and get you high from skin contact.

 

[BeExcellent]

No, you are not wrong. For most children who were raised in a conservative, uptight home. There usually comes a time when most of them rebel against their parents rules. Smart parents usually realize when their children have grown up and they stop being so overprotective.

Smart parents realize that all you can do is talk to your kids at that point and give them advice. If the kid was brought up well, they will carry their upbringing with them wherever they go.

Core values are established very young when we are children and adolescents. It is normal to rail against parental authority. That is the natural differentiation process of you as an individual. If the parents did a solid job raising their children, the core values are internalized and act as a moral compass in the young person's behavior, even as the young person becomes more worldly.

Your parents still see you as a child OP. They freak out about stuff like you are still a kid, and that's a pain. But here's the rub. Many parents (mine included when I was young and myself now that I am a parent with teens) take the attitude of "As long as I'm paying for XYZ, you are doing things my way." So if your parents are paying your tuition and your fraternity dues? Suck it up and tow the line. You are still benefiting from your parents' money or housing or whatever. Their house, their money, their rules. That's the deal.

If you don't like it? You can tell them you are a full grown man and you aren't going to tolerate being treated like anything other than that...and they can say, Ok Nick. Pay your own dues and your own expenses and pay your own tuition, bills and everything else. Good luck and God Bless. And some men cut ties at a young age and go out into the real world and make things happen. The guy I'm dating did just that at age 17, joined the military and got deployed and shot at overseas. Full grown man stuff. You sound to me like you are still in the comfy little bubble that is the college experience and you haven't faced the real world on your own yet.

I'm not trying to be an ass hat here, but you have not fully matured yet as a man prepared to assume all responsibility for yourself. Until you are, tow the line and be grateful you are getting the love, guidance, and support of parents who love you, even though they have their shortcomings and ways of doing things you disagree with.