Never initiates - opinions

antr

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I started seeing this girl 3 weeks ago and we've been on 3 dates so far (didnt have sex with her yet, pretty sure I can on next date).

Problem is this girl NEVER initiates anything but seems to accept all my dates. Last date she postponed 1 hour because something came up. When we met she said she was afraid how I would react to this.

She also asked me if I usually plan everything in advance because she prefers if I just call her on the day I want to see her.

Now my question is should I wait for her to initiate next date since I want her to show some interest and also dont want to come across as needy?
 

dude99

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I started seeing this girl 3 weeks ago and we've been on 3 dates so far (didnt have sex with her yet, pretty sure I can on next date).

Problem is this girl NEVER initiates anything but seems to accept all my dates. Last date she postponed 1 hour because something came up. When we met she said she was afraid how I would react to this.

She also asked me if I usually plan everything in advance because she prefers if I just call her on the day I want to see her.

Now my question is should I wait for her to initiate next date since I want her to show some interest and also dont want to come across as needy?
So far there doesnt seem to be any 'problems' per say just put her in your rotation and carry on business as usual.

Dont take things too serious thats all.
 

wifehunter

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She doesn't have to initiate, when she has plates waiting in line.
 

Trump

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I started seeing this girl 3 weeks ago and we've been on 3 dates so far (didnt have sex with her yet, pretty sure I can on next date).
3 dates and no sex? Do you want companionship or do you want to sleep with her?

Now my question is should I wait for her to initiate next date since I want her to show some interest and also dont want to come across as needy?
You haven’t slept with her yet, does not matter.

She doesn’t have to initiate, she has plates waiting in line.
 

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Glassguy

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Some women are actually old fashioned and want the man to initiate. It doesn't really matter as long as you contact her, set the date and she shows up. Not sure what the problem is but once you fvck her I bet she starts initiating.

I see it as the perfect scenario. You set it up, she comes and doesn't flake, you have fun and escalate. Wash, rinse and repeat. You don't even have to worry about filling her emotional attention cravings in between by responding to her small talk texts and calls in between.

Just make sure that you're escalating on these dates so this doesn't become free drinks and dinner and a friend without benefits situation.
 

wifehunter

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Billtx49

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because she prefers if I just call her on the day I want to see her.
She’s either a very busy girl only living day to day, or she’s not interested enough yet. Plus that game plan of hers enables the flake option.
 
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sazc

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She prefers to keep her options open.

If she allows you to schedule dates in advance, she may have to turn something else down, or decide if she wants to cancel on you.

If you only call her last minute, if she doesn't have an offer, you become the best option, otherwise she can legit say "sorry, busy"
 

marmel75

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You aren't her first option. At the time you might be her best option. You would be wise to escalate next date, the timer is running out on you...
 

lizardking82

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You don't come across needy if you call her and ask to see her. That is what you desire. No man expressing his desire comes across as needy.

In this point, does not matter much who initiates. It matters how the date goes and whether you have sex soon or not.
 

Roober

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Men initiate and set dates. Women say yes. Be a leader!
 

antr

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Some women are actually old fashioned and want the man to initiate. It doesn't really matter as long as you contact her, set the date and she shows up. Not sure what the problem is but once you fvck her I bet she starts initiating.

I see it as the perfect scenario. You set it up, she comes and doesn't flake, you have fun and escalate. Wash, rinse and repeat. You don't even have to worry about filling her emotional attention cravings in between by responding to her small talk texts and calls in between.

Just make sure that you're escalating on these dates so this doesn't become free drinks and dinner and a friend without benefits situation.
She does seem old fashioned that way. I have been escalating as much as I could, just didnt have opportunity for sex yet since I have relatives at my place atm.

I was thinking of calling her tonight and setting up date tomorrow by telling her we should watch a movie at her place.
 

El Payaso

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There's nothing inherently wrong with that yet. Some women are just like that. She doesn't really know you yet. As time goes on and she has developed a significant investment in you, she might start to initiate.

It's good anyway. You get to move things at your own speed and level. If you bang her and things are going well, trust me. She will start to initiate conversations and asking when she's going to see you again.
 

antr

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Update:

I didnt have time to see her since I made this thread. She sent me a text earlier this week, we exchanged few texts and I called her to set a date for tomorrow. I wasnt sure what time I'll be free and told her I'll contact her sometime later to tell her when I'll pick her up on friday.

Is it better to contact her today or wait till tomorrow? Also I want to end the date at her place, how to go on about this? I was thinking of just dropping her off, getting out of car and assume she wants me to come up with her, if she asks I'll just say I want to be sure she gets upstairs safe or some other bs.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

ohrein

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Update:

I didnt have time to see her since I made this thread. She sent me a text earlier this week, we exchanged few texts and I called her to set a date for tomorrow. I wasnt sure what time I'll be free and told her I'll contact her sometime later to tell her when I'll pick her up on friday.

Is it better to contact her today or wait till tomorrow? Also I want to end the date at her place, how to go on about this? I was thinking of just dropping her off, getting out of car and assume she wants me to come up with her, if she asks I'll just say I want to be sure she gets upstairs safe or some other bs.
You're over thinking things and trying to weasel into her house. Is this the behavior of a man who knows what he wants and how to get it? Contact her today, contact her tomorrow? What does it matter? Your job is to excite her enough to be desperate to see you and invite you to her house. Make her laugh and escalate.
 
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