Can't get over girlfriends past

[Aesthetic Indian]

I know I'm gonna sound extremely beta but this is a real issue for me and I know it's all me, all suggestions would be appreciated. I'm dating a girl and we're very much in love with each other. The complete story is as follows : I was interested in another girl for two months, she led me on and Nothing happened, by the time that got over, my current girlfriend started dating this guy in our college, two years older, ugly, short, fat and almost everyone thought he was gay, she herself said that she thought he's a bit gay. I didn't really know her then but always thought of her as a pretty girl who's probably messed up since she was dating that guy lol, they date for 10 months, she breaks up with him, we start talking I fall for her and she tells me she had a crush on me while she was dating him. We start dating and I tell her and she's my first gf, love, kiss, first and second base. Not because of some religious ****, **** that but just because I kept very high standards, which I probably shouldn't have . The first time she gives me a handie I make a comment like " there's always a first time" though I knew she had a boyfriend but he's so ****ing ugly I never thought anything would have happened, she ignores it at the time, two weeks later she tells me shes done that before and Nothing further and that this was very hard for her to tell me, I completely flip out and start roasting the guy, saying he was fat and ugly and what not. I'm a thousand times better than him, she says so herself, I treat her so good, I'm funny, better looking, waaaay better body and she admits she only went out with him because he liked her and she had no friends and he knew everyone in our college and so she would get to know everyone, that pissed me off so much. I just feel really guilty that I wasn't there for her and let her go through an unhealthy relationship with a disgusting guy who should never stand a chance with her, she's ****ing beautiful. I know I'm making too big a deal of this and she said you can take my virginity to me but I just wanted it to be us throughout our college life and be each other's first for everything, what suggestions do you guys have for me? Thanks so much for any hate/advice/ empathy

 

[CMNILS87]

Too long didn’t read. Break up with her. You’re obviously unhappy if you’re posting about it online

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

Too long didn’t read. Break up with her. You’re obviously unhappy if you’re posting about it online

It really isn't a reason enough to break up with her, please give it a read and you might actually laugh at me hahaha, after you read it I'd appreciate your suggestion a lot

 

[Thorninmyside]

You're being ridiculous. Do you expect every girlfriend you have to come out of cold storage having never had any contact with men before? That's muslim talk, man.

There's no need to be first, just best. Your insecurity has already made you the loser here.

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

You're being ridiculous. Do you expect every girlfriend you have to come out of cold storage having never had any contact with men before? That's muslim talk, man.

There's no need to be first, just best. Your insecurity has already made you the loser here.

Fair enough bud, my only problem is that she didn't know her own worth and got manipulated, like if you saw the guy, you'd puke, and she says she felt like she didn't have a choice( kind of pressurised) but she says it's not really his fault.

 

[Thorninmyside]

Don't white-knight for her past. Just bang the ever-loving sh*t out of her and neither of you will think about the other guy again.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Alright my dude, understand this:

There is no such thing as a hot college virgin. Period.

You’re girl isn’t all that sweet and special. There are so many whorror out there that will make you hate women so I won’t go saying any specifics, but your girl isn’t really all that special. In reality it doesn’t even matter. You freaking out about how much better you are or how ****ty he is shoes insecurity. It means that you have a big ego to protect your self-esteem, which means weakness. You can’t be getting jealous or insecure like that really.

 

[Von]

Alright my dude, understand this:

There is no such thing as a hot college virgin. Period.

You’re girl isn’t all that sweet and special. There are so many whorror out there that will make you hate women so I won’t go saying any specifics, but your girl isn’t really all that special. In reality it doesn’t even matter. You freaking out about how much better you are or how ****ty he is shoes insecurity. It means that you have a big ego to protect your self-esteem, which means weakness. You can’t be getting jealous or insecure like that really.

He's indian... for 60% of indians... if she ain't virgin... its damaged goods and most guys can't deal not being ''first'' especially with a girl they consider marriage.

However, like me tell you this OP.... she loves you... why? BECAUSE SHE TOLD YOU.

It's done, there is nothing you can do about the past. The only thing you can do is overcome it.... see the good stuff.
1) She admitted it = She cares about you
2) She did it so she'll be open to do it WITH YOU

OP, you'll get laid if you play your cards right and get over that. Laid = sex.

3) It's not about who passed before, its about who's passing during and after....you want to be the only one DURING and never see an after (cause you aim at being her last and ultimate love).

If you serious about her... you'll overcome it, you'll get the confidence to go over it. See the good: You'll have a complete and real relationship with her... something that all indians and westerners dream off

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

He's indian... for 60% of indians... if she ain't virgin... its damaged goods and most guys can't deal not being ''first'' especially with a girl they consider marriage.

However, like me tell you this OP.... she loves you... why? BECAUSE SHE TOLD YOU.

It's done, there is nothing you can do about the past. The only thing you can do is overcome it.... see the good stuff.
1) She admitted it = She cares about you
2) She did it so she'll be open to do it WITH YOU

OP, you'll get laid if you play your cards right and get over that. Laid = sex.

3) It's not about who passed before, its about who's passing during and after....you want to be the only one DURING and never see an after (cause you aim at being her last and ultimate love).

If you serious about her... you'll overcome it, you'll get the confidence to go over it. See the good: You'll have a complete and real relationship with her... something that all indians and westerners dream off

Lmao I'm going to make a bigger fool of myself, maybe you guys missed that in my rant, she is a virgin, so am I. ( Her and that guy reached second base, nothing further) Im just being upset of the fact that my first of everything was with her and hers was with that nasty guy, but it didn't have to be. I'm kind of stuck in the past and blaming myself because we knew each other it's just that he kept chasing her and she gave in so I judged her for dating that ugly ****er and didn't talk to her much till they broke up, I'm 20 and she's 19, and we're modern Indians dw lolol sex is not taboo and we most probably will lose our virginites to each other knowing well enough that we might not end up with each other since we're Young right now. Basically my problem is - 1) she was vulnerable, lonely and I let the wrong guy have her. 2) she had extremely low self esteem to say yes to him, literally everyone thought what was happening when they saw them together. 3) it kind of makes me feel less special thinking that of that dude could have had her ( she's like 50 leagues above him) 4) we could have been dating since the starting and been 1.5 years into this relationship rather than 2 months had I not fallen for another girl who led me on and focus on her instead. Any suggestions on this? I know I'm being irrational af maybe it's the first love thing which is getting to me

 

[sph21]

I completely flip out and start roasting the guy, saying he was fat and ugly and what not. I'm a thousand times better than him, she says so herself, I treat her so good, I'm funny, better looking, waaaay better body and she admits she only went out with him because he liked her and she had no friends and he knew everyone in our college and so she would get to know everyone, that pissed me off so much.

You made a big mistake. By bad mouthing her boyfriend, it's the same as criticizing her feelings for him. She definitely felt something for him that outweigh his physical inadequacy.

You were too desperate to lose her and then you tried to convince her what a great man you are with words. This will never work.

You can't lose what you can easily have. By stating that you are willing to fight for this relationship more than her, she realizes that the challenge is over and the relationship has dropped its value in her eyes. Always be willing to walk away is a better strategy to deal with this type of situation.

3) it kind of makes me feel less special thinking that of that dude could have had her ( she's like 50 leagues above him)

You're making another mistake. You're putting her on a pedestal. It was her decision to chose him. It doesn't matter what you think of him. What matter is what he/ you make her feel.

You're gauging your self worth from her eyes. You're too dependent on someone else to feel valued. Your value must come from within. It will make you unique over most guys out there and girls can sense this.

4) we could have been dating since the starting and been 1.5 years into this relationship rather than 2 months had I not fallen for another girl who led me on and focus on her instead.

What past is past. It's useless to live in it. You can't change it but you can shape your own future by doing the right thing now.

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

Lmao I'm going to make a bigger fool of myself, maybe you guys missed that in my rant, she is a virgin, so am I. Im just being upset of the fact that my first of everything was with her and hers was with that nasty guy, but it didn't have to be. I'm kind of stuck in the past and blaming myself because we knew each other it's just that he kept chasing her and she gave in so I judged her for dating that ugly ****er and didn't talk to her much till they broke up, I'm 20 and she's 19, and we're modern Indians dw lolol sex is not taboo and we most probably will lose our virginites to each other knowing well enough that we might not end up with each other since we're Young right now. Basically my problem is - 1) she was vulnerable, lonely and I let the wrong guy have her. 2) she had extremely low self esteem to say yes to him, literally everyone thought what was happening when they saw them together. 3) it kind of makes me feel less special thinking that of that dude could have had her ( she's like 50 leagues above him) 4) we could have been dating since the starting and been 1.5 years into this relationship rather than 2 months had I not fallen for another girl who led me on and focus on her instead. Any suggestions on this? I know I'm being irrational af maybe it's the first love thing which is getting to me

You made a big mistake. By bad mouthing her boyfriend, it's the same as criticizing her feelings for him. She definitely felt something for him that outweigh his physical inadequacy.

You were too desperate to lose her and then you tried to convince her what a great man you are with words. This will never work.

You can't lose what you can easily have. By stating that you are willing to fight for this relationship more than her, she realizes that the challenge is over and the relationship has dropped its value in her eyes. Always be willing to walk away is a better strategy to deal with this type of situation.


You're making another mistake. You're putting her on a pedestal. It was her decision to chose him. It doesn't matter what you think of him. What matter is what he/ you make her feel.

You're gauging your self worth from her eyes. You're too dependent on someone else to feel valued. Your value must come from within. It will make you unique over most guys out there and girls can sense this.


What past is past. It's useless to live in it. You can't change it but you can shape your own future by doing the right thing now.

I respect what

You made a big mistake. By bad mouthing her boyfriend, it's the same as criticizing her feelings for him. She definitely felt something for him that outweigh his physical inadequacy.

You were too desperate to lose her and then you tried to convince her what a great man you are with words. This will never work.

You can't lose what you can easily have. By stating that you are willing to fight for this relationship more than her, she realizes that the challenge is over and the relationship has dropped its value in her eyes. Always be willing to walk away is a better strategy to deal with this type of situation.


You're making another mistake. You're putting her on a pedestal. It was her decision to chose him. It doesn't matter what you think of him. What matter is what he/ you make her feel.

You're gauging your self worth from her eyes. You're too dependent on someone else to feel valued. Your value must come from within. It will make you unique over most guys out there and girls can sense this.


What past is past. It's useless to live in it. You can't change it but you can shape your own future by doing the right thing now.

I com

You made a big mistake. By bad mouthing her boyfriend, it's the same as criticizing her feelings for him. She definitely felt something for him that outweigh his physical inadequacy.

You were too desperate to lose her and then you tried to convince her what a great man you are with words. This will never work.

You can't lose what you can easily have. By stating that you are willing to fight for this relationship more than her, she realizes that the challenge is over and the relationship has dropped its value in her eyes. Always be willing to walk away is a better strategy to deal with this type of situation.


You're making another mistake. You're putting her on a pedestal. It was her decision to chose him. It doesn't matter what you think of him. What matter is what he/ you make her feel.

You're gauging your self worth from her eyes. You're too dependent on someone else to feel valued. Your value must come from within. It will make you unique over most guys out there and girls can sense this.


What past is past. It's useless to live in it. You can't change it but you can shape your own future by doing the right thing now.

I

You made a big mistake. By bad mouthing her boyfriend, it's the same as criticizing her feelings for him. She definitely felt something for him that outweigh his physical inadequacy.

You were too desperate to lose her and then you tried to convince her what a great man you are with words. This will never work.

You can't lose what you can easily have. By stating that you are willing to fight for this relationship more than her, she realizes that the challenge is over and the relationship has dropped its value in her eyes. Always be willing to walk away is a better strategy to deal with this type of situation.


You're making another mistake. You're putting her on a pedestal. It was her decision to chose him. It doesn't matter what you think of him. What matter is what he/ you make her feel.

You're gauging your self worth from her eyes. You're too dependent on someone else to feel valued. Your value must come from within. It will make you unique over most guys out there and girls can sense this.


What past is past. It's useless to live in it. You can't change it but you can shape your own future by doing the right thing now.

I completely respect what you have to say, but listen to this : after she broke up with him, her and I were friends breifly and she told me that it was a very unhealthy relationship and they fought almost all the time, they weren't compatible at all and she went out with him in the starting only because she was lonely and had to friends when she was a freshamn and him being a senior he knew everyone and chased her and made her feel important, this guy is fat as **** and used to ask her to lose weight, she's god damn beautiful. I on the other hand am fitter than almost everyone our age and I treat her like a god damn queen because in my heart I feel she deserves it and ten times over. What I get mad about is that she settled for something so bad and gave him a part of her which he never deserved, he even pressurised her to have sex with him, but she didn't go further than second base with him, thank God for that. I guess I'm kind of mad at her about her past choices and the problem is I was present in her life, we just didn't talk because they were together so I naturally backed off.

 

[sosousage]

I know I'm gonna sound extremely beta but this is a real issue for me and I know it's all me, all suggestions would be appreciated. I'm dating a girl and we're very much in love with each other. The complete story is as follows : I was interested in another girl for two months, she led me on and Nothing happened, by the time that got over, my current girlfriend started dating this guy in our college, two years older, ugly, short, fat and almost everyone thought he was gay, she herself said that she thought he's a bit gay. I didn't really know her then but always thought of her as a pretty girl who's probably messed up since she was dating that guy lol, they date for 10 months, she breaks up with him, we start talking I fall for her and she tells me she had a crush on me while she was dating him. We start dating and I tell her and she's my first gf, love, kiss, first and second base. Not because of some religious ****, **** that but just because I kept very high standards, which I probably shouldn't have . The first time she gives me a handie I make a comment like " there's always a first time" though I knew she had a boyfriend but he's so ****ing ugly I never thought anything would have happened, she ignores it at the time, two weeks later she tells me shes done that before and Nothing further and that this was very hard for her to tell me, I completely flip out and start roasting the guy, saying he was fat and ugly and what not. I'm a thousand times better than him, she says so herself, I treat her so good, I'm funny, better looking, waaaay better body and she admits she only went out with him because he liked her and she had no friends and he knew everyone in our college and so she would get to know everyone, that pissed me off so much. I just feel really guilty that I wasn't there for her and let her go through an unhealthy relationship with a disgusting guy who should never stand a chance with her, she's ****ing beautiful. I know I'm making too big a deal of this and she said you can take my virginity to me but I just wanted it to be us throughout our college life and be each other's first for everything, what suggestions do you guys have for me? Thanks so much for any hate/advice/ empathy

but why exactly are you crying over this. young women OFTEN go in relationships to NOT be alone. she used him and thats it as far as I understand. get over it

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

but why exactly are you crying over this. young women OFTEN go in relationships to NOT be alone. she used him and thats it as far as I understand. get over it

She got used as well, like before him she had no sexual experience, and he isn't a virgin, so she kind of felt obligated to do **** with him, though they got as far as second base, if you saw him, you'd see no girl would out of lust have anything to do with him, she just thought she " loved " him. My main problem is that she is my first kiss and first everything, but she has done all this first and with that guy, and she regrets it a lot. It's just that this didn't have to be this way because we could have gone out since the starting, since we're in the same class. It's just that older ******* got to her first and by the time I started talking to her properly they were already dating, so I just backed off

 

[Thatfeel21]

She got used as well, like before him she had no sexual experience, and he isn't a virgin, so she kind of felt obligated to do **** with him, though they got as far as second base, if you saw him, you'd see no girl would out of lust have anything to do with him, she just thought she " loved " him. My main problem is that she is my first kiss and first everything, but she has done all this first and with that guy, and she regrets it a lot. It's just that this didn't have to be this way because we could have gone out since the starting, since we're in the same class. It's just that older ******* got to her first and by the time I started talking to her properly they were already dating, so I just backed off

Is this an Indian thing? You are being ridiculous, why do you care so damn much? If she is tht beautiful thrn f*** her and keep it moving.

 

[Alvafe]

She got used as well, like before him she had no sexual experience, and he isn't a virgin, so she kind of felt obligated to do **** with him, though they got as far as second base, if you saw him, you'd see no girl would out of lust have anything to do with him, she just thought she " loved " him. My main problem is that she is my first kiss and first everything, but she has done all this first and with that guy, and she regrets it a lot. It's just that this didn't have to be this way because we could have gone out since the starting, since we're in the same class. It's just that older ******* got to her first and by the time I started talking to her properly they were already dating, so I just backed off

dude stop wishing for a disney relationship, she ****ed first then you so what? if you are a virgin after 18 chances are you will never find a no used girl to be her first,(unless you want to risk jail time, and even so bet you wouln't be her first anyway), yes you are patetic, yes she is a ***** who traded sex for a thing she wanted, now growth a spine and or break up with her or ignore this,

but way you are wishing we give you a sure way to forget it all or to fix it, I know you won't do anything,you will keep over thinking over this, she will notice, she will see you are a worse fag then her last BF and or break up with you or start to hang out with other male "friends"

so come back after she dump you ok? maybe then you will be open to learn

 

[sosousage]

She got used as well, like before him she had no sexual experience, and he isn't a virgin, so she kind of felt obligated to do **** with him, though they got as far as second base, if you saw him, you'd see no girl would out of lust have anything to do with him, she just thought she " loved " him. My main problem is that she is my first kiss and first everything, but she has done all this first and with that guy, and she regrets it a lot. It's just that this didn't have to be this way because we could have gone out since the starting, since we're in the same class. It's just that older ******* got to her first and by the time I started talking to her properly they were already dating, so I just backed off

why do you blame the fat guy? your girl was with him cause she was horny and she thought she cant do better anyway.

Btw I have couple Indian friends (no racism intended) in the age of 22 they all virgins lol indian society is so sex deprived (at least guys )

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

Both of us are still virgins, she reached second base with her ex and Nothing further. So I guess I still have her virginity to take ( she said we'll lose it to each other one day) so I guess I'm being over dramatic

dude stop wishing for a disney relationship, she ****ed first then you so what? if you are a virgin after 18 chances are you will never find a no used girl to be her first,(unless you want to risk jail time, and even so bet you wouln't be her first anyway), yes you are patetic, yes she is a ***** who traded sex for a thing she wanted, now growth a spine and or break up with her or ignore this,

but way you are wishing we give you a sure way to forget it all or to fix it, I know you won't do anything,you will keep over thinking over this, she will notice, she will see you are a worse fag then her last BF and or break up with you or start to hang out with other male "friends"

so come back after she dump you ok? maybe then you will be open to learn

 

[Aesthetic Indian]

why do you blame the fat guy? your girl was with him cause she was horny and she thought she cant do better anyway.

Btw I have couple Indian friends (no racism intended) in the age of 22 they all virgins lol indian society is so sex deprived (at least guys )

Lmao she wasn't horny at all. Look at his face you'll see, she thought of it as an obligation because she loved him and she told me herself that she felt she had no choice. ( By the way she is a virgin, guy tried but could only get to second base with her)

 

[sosousage]

Both of us are still virgins, she reached second base with her ex and Nothing further. So I guess I still have her virginity to take ( she said we'll lose it to each other one day) so I guess I'm being over dramatic

yeah you cry about something that DIDNT HAPPEN if it was written by @bigneil I would be sure its troll thread

 

[Alvafe]

Both of us are still virgins, she reached second base with her ex and Nothing further. So I guess I still have her virginity to take ( she said we'll lose it to each other one day) so I guess I'm being over dramatic

don't trust so much without proof, plus since you react that way chances are she will never really tell the truth if she did otherwise