Need advice on moving forward.

Luci

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Long time observer, please forgive.

I've just recently gotten out of a LTR and am starting to refresh myself on the finer arts again. Without too much pop and circumstance, I'll dive right in.

Currently talking to 3, but 1 interests me a little bit more than the rest.

We've been chatting for over 3 months and things were gravy up until a week ago. By gravy I mean we've hooked up multiple times (a lot) and she would initiate a lot contact (text/call/snaps). Perhaps to the tone of chatting off and on all day. Her reaching out clearly indicated her interest to me and has been that way for a long time.

This week, there has been an incredible decrease in communications. I have been initiating all text convos and our chats seem to end with her not responding. I've tried to initiate facetime chats and she's deflected them. She did say to me one night that she was sorry she's been hard to talk to lately. On a positive, she does initiate snaps each day though (not sure how high value these are considered).

This is a holiday, so there is a chance that might have something to do with it, but the way everyone is attached to their phones these days, I would argue against it.

If I am over thinking this and need to chill, I'm cool with that. I tend to over think most everything.

Looking for next moves (tactics) dealing with this particular girl, I will continue to work on others as well. I just like to win em all!
 

skinnyguy

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If you start sticking your penis in other women she will magically increase interest in you. Go NC on this chick (she's just a ho/plate) so you have no reason to invest this much mental energy in her.
 

JonnyD123

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The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates.

Got it?
 

dude99

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The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates. The phone is for setting dates.

Got it?
This.

And i would add, ignore her snapchats. Ignore instagrams ignore all Facebook all social media. Use text only. Offer her a date place and time. Pigeon hole how you will comunicate to her.

This will show her true interest level.

Social media is an easy way for her to throw you breadcrumbs. It is their way of keeping you on the string.

Ignore her attempts to throw bread crumbs and set a date.

If she ignores that but likes your crap on social media you next her.
 

Luci

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Maybe I've been doing it wrong all these years. Since I travel a good bit, I've used texting as a means to keep things warm.

NC always seemed like the nuclear option and I always feel like I can talk my way in and out of anything.

While understanding a woman's true interest is one thing, don't we always want to be making moves to improve their level of interest?

Thanks for the advice gents.
 

wifehunter

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you are 'too easy'...chicks will lose interest.
 

JonnyD123

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don't we always want to be making moves to improve their level of interest?

Thanks for the advice gents.
No. She should be doing 70-80% of the texting/calling/pursuing. When she reaches out, assume she wants to see you, and set a date.

If she says yes: "Great, see you then. Gotta run."

If she says no: "Well it was nice hearing from you, gotta get back to work/school/jerking off."

Ask her out a maximum of two times. If she declines, either soft next or just delete her #. I know this all sounds robotic but trust me it works.
 

Luci

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you are 'too easy'...chicks will lose interest.
Please ellaborate on this. The last thing I want to be is easy to anyone.

No. She should be doing 70-80% of the texting/calling/pursuing. When she reaches out, assume she wants to see you, and set a date.

If she says yes: "Great, see you then. Gotta run."

If she says no: "Well it was nice hearing from you, gotta get back to work/school/jerking off."

Ask her out a maximum of two times. If she declines, either soft next or just delete her #. I know this all sounds robotic but trust me it works.
70-80%, Men chase though right? Hmm I still have a lot to learn.
 

Bible_Belt

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There's not a lot of information here to go on. Sometimes sh!t happens that has nothing to do with you. A lot of people get depressed around the holidays. I would back off, give her a little space, and the next time you see her *in person* then you should genuinely ask if she is ok. Not "are we ok?" Notice the difference between those two questions. That might be why she is talking to you less - she could be feeling down for reasons unrelated to you, but does not want you to think it is because of you.
 

JonnyD123

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Men chase though right? Hmm I still have a lot to learn.
Initially, yes. Generally, however, you want to start with a woman who has high interest in you. It will make things so much easier. If a girl likes you, she will make it easy for you to seduce her. All you have to do is just not say anything stupid. Which is why you let her do most of the talking. Ask questions, and listen.

After you sleep with her is when you then sit back and wait for her to reach out to you. In which case you follow my prior instructions.
 

Luci

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Well played gentlemen. Now I'm having to play wack-a-mole those "I miss you's" and "I'm sorry it's hard for me to talk's" she's sending me.

Pigeon whole'd her and got something on the books.
 

marmel75

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Don't fall into this trap where you stop going on dates/banging with other women because you like one more than the others unless you are going exclusive. Because she most assuredly is not only seeing you, which you are now finding out.

Her lack of communication means she is seeing and likely banging another guy.

Do the same and follow suit. It will all get sorted out.
 
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