Did I Play This Right?

[foolyoufool]

The Sparknote Version:

This girl I've been seeing (haven't banged yet) assumed I was DTF (I am), and I played hard to get. She's been acting cold since, I suspect she's insecure and thinks I don't want her. I haven't communicated with her in about five days. Did I play this correctly, and what should I do going forward?

Text conversation where this went down:

.....
me: Where were ur parties?
her: All in ---
her: If I had known you didn't go last night I would have invited you too
her: I'm glad you had fun
me: you just wanted to get me drunk and take advantage, but thanks for the thought
her: I don't need to get you drunk to have you want to sleep with me
her: but no worries lmao
me: How can you be so sure?
her: Well I guess I can never be 100 percent sure but the majority of guys will sleep with a girl even if they don't like her
her: So
me: Wow you have a pretty messed up view of guys
her: I know a lot of guys who have straight up told me that was the case
me: Sounds like you're not talking to the right kind of guys
her: Not even guys I dated, but just guys I've talked to as friends
her: So you wouldn't sleep with me then?
me: Maybe, maybe not
her: Wow Okay
me: I like to take things slow
her: Okay
me: I want to see you again soon
her: I'm busy the next 12 days working
her: but after that I'm free

convo continues... I set up a date for later that week (her schedule magically opened up) to which she flaked the night before.

The Long Version:
So I've been talking to this girl for about a month, and her interest level seems to be waning. We've been on two dates, and after the end of the second date she couldn't stop telling me how much she wanted to F--- me , sent me naked pictures every morning, and would initiate text conversations everyday.

Since that date she's flaked on two since (by cancelling the night before). This text conversation happened between the first and second flake.

I've thought of better things I could have said instead of "Maybe, maybe not" like "I'm not sure you could handle me" or "Why don't you come over and find out," but, as I haven't heard from her in a while and am currently not contacting her, what can I do to bed her from here?

Your input is much appreciated, thanks guys!!

 

[marmel75]

How could you honestly write what you just wrote and then ask if you plated it right?

Maybe instead of worrying about what you should text you should worry about why you didn't bang her when you had the greenest of green lights.

 

[foolyoufool]

How could you honestly write what you just wrote and then ask if you plated it right?

Maybe instead of worrying about what you should text you should worry about why you didn't bang her when you had the greenest of green lights.

I tried bringing her back to my place after the second date (we went to a concert), she initially agreed but then said she had to go home because her mom was waiting up for her and she had to get up early (she's 18 and still lives with her parents). I was persistent nevertheless in trying to bring her back but she was firm in that she needed to leave.

 

[Urbanyst]

When a woman says "I'm busy for the next 12 days" she is basically saying my schedule is PACKED with things I care MORE about than dealing with YOU.

Only the most DESPERATE men can't take these obvious hints. Acting desperate just gets you in the friendzone, placed in her orbiter orbit or if you're lucky.. sex way down the road when she has a moment of weakness after getting dumped by some other dude she is f*cking lol.

Don't chase, replace.

 

[Glassguy]

Her: I dont need to get you drunk to sleep with me
Me: Luckily I am not drinking now, so lets find out. Head over, here is the address.

At that point she comes over or she doesnt. Its all talk or she bangs.

If she told me she was busy for the next 12 days, dude I honestly wouldnt even fvcking respond back.

You missed the opportunity to fvck this chick because you tried to play texting rico suave instead of telling her to come over.

Fvcking > Texting

 

[Glassguy]

You texted yourself right out of her panties.

 

[Glassguy]

When a woman says "I'm busy for the next 12 days" she is basically saying my schedule is PACKED with things I care MORE about than dealing with YOU.

Only the most DESPERATE men can't take these obvious hints. Acting desperate just gets you in the friendzone, placed in her orbiter orbit or if you're lucky.. sex way down the road when she has a moment of weakness after getting dumped by some other dude she is f*cking lol.

Don't chase, replace.

She was wet and wanted c0ck. He over texted her and tried to play hard to get, instead of going for the kill.

By the 12 days comment she really meant "I will find a man that wants to fvck me and get the the point".

Classic scenario of texting too much. When the chick gets sexual, invite them over. Put them on the spot to put out or GTFO.

 

[FwoGiZ]

Ya you fcked up... you had a golden opportunities there...
No point in being an ass to a girl that's actually showing interest and putting out.

 

[The Duke]

Did you think playing the "I'm not one of those guys" card was going to help you? She put it on the table, you stalled out acting like a good church boy and that was the beginning of the end. Its not attractive to a woman when they are far more direct/aggressive than you. She led more of the encounter than you did. She offered it, and you didn't act like a normal man. As a result she probably felt rejected at your lack of execution. You acted like a little faggot.

 

[wifehunter]

 

[foolyoufool]

She was wet and wanted c0ck. He over texted her and tried to play hard to get, instead of going for the kill.

By the 12 days comment she really meant "I will find a man that wants to fvck me and get the the point".

Classic scenario of texting too much. When the chick gets sexual, invite them over. Put them on the spot to put out or GTFO.

Yep, I'm aware of the what the 12 day comment means. I suspect she is an attention wh0re because days before this text convo we made plans to hang out and she flaked.

How should I play this going forward? Text her in a week or so and set up something, or just let her go? It's been 6 days since I've communicated with her.

 

[Glassguy]

I would hit her up and say:

"I am not drinking today.....lets see if you can persuade me to sleep with you when I am not drunk. Why dont you head over at 8pm and let the games begin "

See what she says. Its an all or nothing text but at this point you have nothing to lose and some pvssy to gain. If she doesnt respond, oh well.

If she is still interested she will at least counter offer with a specific day.

 

[foolyoufool]

I would hit her up and say:

"I am not drinking today.....lets see if you can persuade me to sleep with you when I am not drunk. Why dont you head over at 8pm and let the games begin "

See what she says. Its an all or nothing text but at this point you have nothing to lose and some pvssy to gain. If she doesnt respond, oh well.

If she is still interested she will at least counter offer with a specific day.

Cool, I can do that. Out of curiousity, how do you respond if she responds "I can't do today"?

 

[wifehunter]

 

[foolyoufool]

View attachment 1128

Pretty much how I'm feeling right now

 

[Glassguy]

Cool, I can do that. Out of curiousity, how do you respond if she responds "I can't do today"?

"I cant do today"
"No problem on short notice. When are you free?"

At that point its either a solid commitment from her or move on. If she says not sure, I will let you know/get back with you, whatever the case may be, just tell her to "Hit me up when you figure it out" and dont respond ever again unless she reaches back out with at time to get together.

 

[foolyoufool]

"I cant do today"
"No problem on short notice. When are you free?"

At that point its either a solid commitment from her or move on. If she says not sure, I will let you know/get back with you, whatever the case may be, just tell her to "Hit me up when you figure it out" and dont respond ever again unless she reaches back out with at time to get together.

Nice. I generally take the same approach. I'll let you know my results

 

[foolyoufool]

"I cant do today"
"No problem on short notice. When are you free?"

At that point its either a solid commitment from her or move on. If she says not sure, I will let you know/get back with you, whatever the case may be, just tell her to "Hit me up when you figure it out" and dont respond ever again unless she reaches back out with at time to get together.

So here’s is the conversation I’ve had with her today, my comments in brackets:

Me: Hi —-. So I was thinking about our conversation this last Sunday. I’m not drinking today, let’s see if you can persuade me to sleep with you when I’m not drunk. Why don’t you come over around 8pm and let the games begin

Her: Haha I can’t tonight [I called it]

Me: I know it’s short notice, when are you free?

Her: Ummm to do what? Like what time of the day and I’ll tell you

Me: For us to test your theory. I’m free nights from 8pm on

Her: Haha what every girl wants to hear .. come try to convince me to sleep with you

Her: Um I think Wednesday night I’m free?

Me: Wednesday works, see ya at my place tomorrow at 8pm

[this is where s— hits the fan]

Her: Whoa wait. I gotta check and see, I’ve got people staying with me

Her: Plus my mom won’t be cool with me going to your place ?? And I still live with her soooo

Her: and I’m not trying to be rude, just honest, but like the way you kinda rejected me makes me not want to just show up at your place


[I don’t like I handled this, please advise how I could have responded better]

Me: —— You know I think you are ****ing hot. You remember how I was touching you at ——.

Me: I was being facetious that Sunday and I hurt you. For that I am sorry

Her: No you don’t need to apologize, it just kinda put me off I guess? I dunno

Me: Talking about this over text isn’t good. Meet me tomorrow night and let’s talk about it then

Her: I really don’t know if I can. At least not your place

Me: Okay, hit me up once you know if you’re free and we can decide on a place

Her: Okay I’ll know tonight, I have to see what the people staying with me are doing because I think they leave Thursday so we might go to dinner

I haven’t responded yet. Would really appreciate your input into what I could’ve said when s—- hit the fan, and what I should do from here.

 

[Glassguy]

Just leave it alone. She will get back to you if she wants to get together. In the meantime, find more women and let this one be.

When she said "what every girl wants to hear blah blah" I would have said "hey it was your idea . If you've changed your mind, no problem take care."

 

[foolyoufool]

Just leave it alone. She will get back to you if she wants to get together. In the meantime, find more women and let this one be.

When she said "what every girl wants to hear blah blah" I would have said "hey it was your idea . If you've changed your mind, no problem take care."

Cool, I have a couple of hypotheticals for you:

1. If she says she’s free, would you push for her to come to my place, or suggest somewhere else closeby (like froyo)? She seems to be hung up on going straight to my place.
2. What would you have said to that series of messages when she laid out that she felt rejected?