Approaching Girls at the Gym

[jaymbrs]

Who here has had positive experience picking up girls from the gym?

I've recently failed with 1 girl at the gym over the summer. I approached her as she was leaving and told her I couldn't let her leave without exchanging names. We chatted for a brief moment and she left without exchanging numbers. The next time I saw her, I approached her while she was in between sets. This time it felt a little awkward. Conversation was understandably short but I asked if she was interested in hanging out sometime. She shot me down stating she was very busy with work, etc. The next few times I would see her, she wouldn't even look in my direction. It became a trend and eventually the flame died out. Now I'm back to square zero and we don't even notice each other.

I find it to be rather difficult when both myself and them are wearing headphones, mentally focused on our workouts, etc. However, even when I see a girl checking me out, I can't seem to find a valid reason to approach them other than to get the digits. I've heard girls are put off by this. So then how should it be done?

Let me add this isn't about me asking for help on my past experience with approaching women at the gym. I would just like to hear about everyone's experience and opinions in doing so.

 

[John Constantine]

I asked about 10 girls at my gym, been with one of them for five months and the other one for two months. I only approach if I suspect a high level of interest OR if she's very hot and do not seem bitchy. I couldnt help you very much in regards of what to say because I'm still learning but remember that it's gonna be awkward 7 times out of 10 when you begin.. Small talk, practice, and then open with something better and go for the phone number

 

[byers90]

At one gym I went there was one girl that liked me. I know so because she wouldn't look directly at me when I could see but I often felt as if I was being checked out. Then finally I caught her one day when I was using an Ab machine - she was using the elliptical's which were right behind me. In front of the Ab machines were huge mirrors so i'd see her turn her head to look at me regularly when I used them.

After realizing that I talked to her the next time I saw her. I just went up to her and made small talk, got the #. It was cool but not something I actively try to do...honestly when I go to the gym I just want to get my work out in.

 

[jaymbrs]

At one gym I went there was one girl that liked me. I know so because she wouldn't look directly at me when I could see but I often felt as if I was being checked out. Then finally I caught her one day when I was using an Ab machine - she was using the elliptical's which were right behind me. In front of the Ab machines were huge mirrors so i'd see her turn her head to look at me regularly when I used them.

After realizing that I talked to her the next time I saw her. I just went up to her and made small talk, got the #. It was cool but not something I actively try to do...honestly when I go to the gym I just want to get my work out in.

In all honesty I go to workout myself. But I've been a gym rat for over a decade now and feel I'm really missing out on some great ass by not approaching women there. Opportunities left and right. And after awhile I feel by saying "I'm just here to workout" has been becoming an excuse to not socialize at the gym. Personally, if I'm going to date a woman, she needs to be an avid gym-goer. So my thoughts are the gym is the perfect place to start when meeting women. Already checks off one of the boxes.

 

[Epicurus]

Don’t do it. 90% of people don’t want to be approached or talked with at the gym(myself included). I have a good amount of “friends” who are girls and 99% of them even wear headphones without any music on. Just so no guy will approach them.

They also regularly tell me how annoying a guy coming up to them even when they have their earphones in and proceed to try to Mack on them. Personally I’d say it’s a very bad idea.

 

[Reykhel]

Who here has had positive experience picking up girls from the gym?

You're not working out hard enough there little fella.

I approached her as she was leaving and told her I couldn't let her leave without exchanging names.

Kind of cringeworthy...

The next time I saw her, I approached her while she was in between sets. This time it felt a little awkward.

You should be focused on your workout. This is your time. Get down to business.

It's the same when men join salsa and bachata "just to meet women". The trick is you have to really want to do it and really become good at, own it, practice it, be obsessed.......(contextual alpha).....then the irony is women will see you as being wrapped up in your passion and you will indirectly score easily with women at dance classes and clubs....
Same concept.
Pesky man bothering gym members while they are working out

asked if she was interested in hanging out sometime. She shot me down stating she was very busy with work, etc

wow. hang out sometime? are you kids? have a sleep over?
this is so vague and wishy washy and unconfident.

The next few times I would see her, she wouldn't even look in my direction.

Read that to yourself a few times.
Your sub communications are screaming creepy, pesky and needy.

 

[byers90]

In all honesty I go to workout myself. But I've been a gym rat for over a decade now and feel I'm really missing out on some great ass by not approaching women there. Opportunities left and right. And after awhile I feel by saying "I'm just here to workout" has been becoming an excuse to not socialize at the gym. Personally, if I'm going to date a woman, she needs to be an avid gym-goer. So my thoughts are the gym is the perfect place to start when meeting women. Already checks off one of the boxes.

You're gonna do what you're gonna do---do what you want. I just think time is a very valuable resource and it's easy to get side tracked and forget what you were doing. If you don't have a lot of time to spend at the gym this can get in the way of your fitness goals. But if you want a "fit" woman I guess it's a good place to look.

 

[jaymbrs]

You're not working out hard enough there little fella.


Kind of cringeworthy...


You should be focused on your workout. This is your time. Get down to business.

It's the same when men join salsa and bachata "just to meet women". The trick is you have to really want to do it and really become good at, own it, practice it, be obsessed.......(contextual alpha).....then the irony is women will see you as being wrapped up in your passion and you will indirectly score easily with women at dance classes and clubs....
Same concept.
Pesky man bothering gym members while they are working out


wow. hang out sometime? are you kids? have a sleep over?
this is so vague and wishy washy and unconfident.


Read that to yourself a few times.
Your sub communications are screaming creepy, pesky and needy.

Thanks for the responses. Not everything I said was ver batem. I'm at my prime physically. I receive quite a few looks from women at the gym and feel by continuing what I've been doing (which is do nothing but workout) I may be missing out on some good opportunities to meet more women.

 

[Reykhel]

I may be missing out on some good opportunities to meet more women.

Life is not only about meeting more women.

Why do you feel that you are not meeting enough women in your life?

What would the opportunity to meet more women bring to your life?

What are you looking for?

A man needs to have space to breath and work and grow.

There is a time for women and there is a time for space.

 

[jaymbrs]

Life is not only about meeting more women.

Why do you feel that you are not meeting enough women in your life?

What would the opportunity to meet more women bring to your life?

What are you looking for?

A man needs to have space to breath and work and grow.

There is a time for women and there is a time for space.

I've been on a dating hiatus for 8 months after things didn't workout with my ex of 4 years. A lot of it has to do with my youth. I'll be 31 soon. Things are changing. I'd like to even the odds of finding the right woman.

 

[resilient]

I've been on a dating hiatus for 8 months after things didn't workout with my ex of 4 years. A lot of it has to do with my youth. I'll be 31 soon. Things are changing. I'd like to even the odds of finding the right woman.

Excellent. Get that stable or bullpen full of plates so your odds will be even greater than before and most of all balanced.

 

[QuadDeuces]

You're in the gym to hammer the racks, the hoes are gonna have to wait.

 

[skinnyguy]

I've gotten rejected by a fat girl at the gym. The male to female ratio there is 20:1.

 

[Reykhel]

I've gotten rejected by a fat girl at the gym.

Probably a true reflection of your sexual market value. Use it to grow. Don't allow all of those rejections to weigh on top
of you and become bitter. Reykhel believes you can overcome your limitations.

The male to female ratio there is 20:1.

That's one way to frame a rejection. Rationalize that it must be because of the male to female ratio.....

 

[Hollywood4life]

I’ve been approaching at the gym a lot lately and it seems a lot of the girls are just there attention seeking…1.I approach ,2.they seek me out later for convo/validation3.won’t hangout/but still seek me out in gym to talk lol

anyways there’s this fine azz Latina I want to approach but she wears a t shirt and boy shorts,looks homely(her clothes ).
Anyone got a opener for the gym ?

or advice if to go direct or not there..seems a lot of guys say play it coo


overall girls really seem interested ,but really are just there mainly to get there fix (vally) at the gym

 

[Old Balls]

If I didn't strike up short, but flirty conversations with the young mixed race beauty with hella resting ***** face who lights up like the Christmas tree in Rockefeller square when she sees me now, the young beauty that would do everything in her power to not make eye contact with me no matter what but now I catch stealing looks all the time, the young blue-eyed beauty with the camel toe who is the sweetest girl in the world, the blonde blue-eyed rich milf beauty who wanted a relationship after 2 weeks of non stop fvckng, the blonde closet stripper beauty who would practice her routine on me (for free), the bashful beauty with the most amazing smile, the other mixed race track athlete beauty with legs and poon that defy description, the college cheerleader beauty who has an affinity for road head, the young tall blonde beauty who was all in until she found out my age, the young yoga addict who would buy plan-b on the way to my house on a regular basis, I would just be jerkin it like a maniac in tears to the thought of maybe possibly doing the things I've actually done.

I can keep going, but I think this blows holes in the social construct that the gym is off limits. I used to think the same until I couldn't take the torture of not taking my piece of the pie. Having pie is good. Having no pie is not good.

I am no model gym rat and I'm not loaded either. The girls I like are half my age. I dont win them all. But one thing I do is make my presence known. They know I exist.

I found out the hard way about "long game". It is my standard practice in the gym and my yoga classes now. Start small, but keep it persistent. They will pretend to not even fvcking see you until a few small interactions are under their belt.

No asking for numbers or dates for a while, at least until she makes it painfully obvious that she goes out of her way to acknowledge you. This is another form of torture. Maybe it takes one conversation, maybe it takes 25. Just briefly light them up with something about what a little ass-kicker they are and bask in their smile for a minute and get back to work, no lingering. Oh, and briefly chat up other dudes and girls in her presence for cover and intrigue.

I like to open the box of chocolates to see what's inside.