Who here wants to get married and why?

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
More vetting:

Your Habits, Your Marriage
The risk of divorce was said to be almost doubled – 97 per cent higher – when the mother went out to work but her husband made a “minimal contribution” to housework and childcare.

Your Parent’s Relationship

If your parents married others after divorcing, you’re 91 percent more likely to get divorced.

According to Nicholas Wolfinger in “Understanding the Divorce Cycle”, the risk of divorce is 50 percent higher when one spouse comes from a divorced home and 200 percent higher when both partners do.

In addition, children of divorce are 50 percent more likely to marry another child of divorce.

Certain studies have shown that daughters of divorced parents have a 60 percent higher divorce rate in marriages than children of non-divorced parents while sons have a 35 percent higher rate.

Addiction, Mental Illness and Divorce
Couples are an astonishing 76-95% more likely to get divorced if only one of them smokes. The amount increases when the wife is the partner with the habit.

While couples who both smoke have it a bit better, a 1998 study found they are still 53% more likely than non-smoking couples to end their marriage.

Each liter of alcohol consumer raises the chance of divorce by 20%! Factor in that the average American drinks 9.4 liters of Alcohol per year, raising their divorce likely hood by 188%!

However, if one spouse is a heavy drinker and the other is not, they are 60 percent more likely to get divorced.

A multi-national study of mental disorders, marriage and divorce published in 2011 found that a sample of 18 mental disorders all increased the likelihood of divorce — ranging from a 20 percent increase to an 80 percent increase in the divorce rate. Addictions and major depression were the highest factors, with PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) also significant.
 

Tenacity

Banned
Joined
Jun 23, 2014
Messages
3,926
Reaction score
2,194
Vetting Tenacity, vetting. What does this chart tell you:

And:

Researchers estimate that 41 percent of all first marriages end in divorce
Lol sir the only thing you can do at this point.......is go out, find your snowflake, marry her, and report back to us how it's working. That's the next step in this discussion, we have literally put out all aspects, nuisances, and details of the various debate points.

When do you plan on getting married? Will it be sometime before the end of the 4th Quarter?
 

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
Lol sir the only thing you can do at this point.......is go out, find your snowflake, marry her, and report back to us how it's working. That's the next step in this discussion, we have literally put out all aspects, nuisances, and details of the various debate points.

When do you plan on getting married? Will it be sometime before the end of the 4th Quarter?
Certainly not this year. As to the future, maybe, maybe not, let's see.

One important point I didn't mention to some of you is if you were looking for a 100% guarantee in any decision that you make, you will never make decisions. Only guarantee in life is death--and that to, may not be a true guarantee if we discovered how to reverse aging one day.

The only decision a person can make is an intelligent one, which is founded upon a high probability of success, low probability of failure, a big return, and minimal risk. This is the entire scope of a SMART decision. Nothing more, nothing less.

If marriage can fit within this scope of being a SMART choice, then you can do it. If not, then don't. Simple.
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
5,602
Reaction score
8,495
Here is something to think about for those considering marriage:

You see, I'm the "cool" guy in my neighborhood who does what he pleases. The kids all like me, the married dudes all live vicariously thru me, and their women hate me. They see all of these "toys" I have. They see all of these random girls that visit. Whenever the guys see a new vehicle parked in my driveway, they are sending me texts asking who the new girl is and wanting pics! Why is it you suppose the women hate me? lol.

When the married guys stop by to chat, they always tell me how I have it made. They wish they could be me. There is not one married guy on my street out of 7 that I talk to who is happy with his marriage. They simply tolerate it and stay suppressed in an attempt to keep their women happy. The truth always comes out when its man to man and no women are around.

How is it you plan to be happy in your marriage? My exwife and I stayed happier than most couples. People were shocked when we got divorced because we did have such a good marriage.

I did proper vetting, had 14 very good years out of the 15 I lived together with my exwife and it still failed. Her and I were a very good match.

And when @BeExcellent tells me she is going to vet better and select a top tier man the 2nd time and its going to be A-OK, I just shake my head.

"WTF am I supposed to do"????? ....oh yeah, be a better man! Be a top tier man. Because all of those executive's with the Bentley's parked outside the lounge at the Ritz Carlton on Saturday night hanging with their wives/friends are such great men. Schitt. I've hit on their wives(unknowingly) before. Those are some of the least happy marriages I know. One guy tried to offer his wife to me so he could continue flirting with some random girls seated at the bar. One of my buddies had a 3some with some "top tier" couple that night. Whenever I go to the high dollar bars/lounges where the top tier people congregate, I get more eye contact from married women than any other place I go to. These women have "frustration and unhappiness" written all over them. They are always the most eager for attention. You aren't going to convince me that these men/women are happy either. Being "top tier" does not fix these problems.
 
Last edited:

Tenacity

Banned
Joined
Jun 23, 2014
Messages
3,926
Reaction score
2,194
One important point I didn't mention to some of you is if you were looking for a 100% guarantee in any decision that you make, you will never make decisions. Only guarantee in life is death--and that to, may not be a true guarantee if we discovered how to reverse aging one day.
Okay that's true......

The only decision a person can make is an intelligent one, which is founded upon a high probability of success, low probability of failure, a big return, and minimal risk. This is the entire scope of a SMART decision. Nothing more, nothing less.

If marriage can fit within this scope of being a SMART choice, then you can do it. If not, then don't. Simple.
Correct. Understand, I'm a business guy, you can't acquire RETURNS if you aren't willing to take calculated RISKS. But every decision needs to be thought out, planned, and based on facts, data, and logic.

I have been studying and examining the topic of marriage and the overall ROLE I want women to play in my life since at least 2011. For Tenacity, women are BEST left in a non-legal role as either one night stands, associates, friends with benefits, or girlfriends. No co-habitation, no marriage, no child custody, etc.

That is the SMART decision and direction for Tenacity. It might not be for another guy on here, but for me, that's the SMART decision and direction that again.....has been planned out, thought out, and finalized over the course of the last 6 years. This isn't a decision I came to within 6 minutes.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 14, 2014
Messages
5,775
Reaction score
2,974
Age
25
Location
Right behind you
Yet the DIVORCE rate remains around 50%.

Even many people here who "vet" well are DIVORCED lol.
Because most people IGNORE the signs. As for the guys here who are divorced, they got divorced BEFORE they came here. And in case you haven’t noticed already, a lot of of the guys who come here were social outcasts for most of, if not all of their lives. Use some logic my dude. You can sense that just by reading the posts on here. Only autists can’t see that because of their lack of social skills. Which I suppose makes sense too, especially since a lot of dudes on here think that there’s only one way to get women just like autistic people.
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,726
Reaction score
6,711
Age
55
Come on now @Howiestern I've not said anything what you ought or ought not do. I've not shamed anyone.

Do as you please (and you are). I've said myself that I am highly unlikely to remarry since my assets already have enough to fund & I don't want to put them at risk again. And like you, I do as I please. It's quite nice

For those who want to have children (I'm done and you don't) there are benefits to having a nuclear family.

I know plenty of marrieds who really are happy. Now granted I reside in a traditionally minded affluent conservative area but I know more happy marrieds than unhappy.

I do also know at least one unhappy guy...he's a surgeon and does feels stuck because of the financial bit and his teenage kids.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 14, 2014
Messages
5,775
Reaction score
2,974
Age
25
Location
Right behind you
Here is something to think about for those considering marriage:

You see, I'm the "cool" guy in my neighborhood who does what he pleases. The kids all like me, the married dudes all live vicariously thru me, and their women hate me. They see all of these "toys" I have. They see all of these random girls that visit. Whenever the guys see a new vehicle parked in my driveway, they are sending me texts asking who the new girl is and wanting pics! Why is it you suppose the women hate me? lol.

When the married guys stop by to chat, they always tell me how I have it made. They wish they could be me. There is not one married guy on my street out of 7 that I talk to who is happy with his marriage. They simply tolerate it and stay suppressed in an attempt to keep their women happy. The truth always comes out when its man to man and no women are around.

How is it you plan to be happy in your marriage? My exwife and I stayed happier than most couples. People were shocked when we got divorced because we did have such a good marriage.

I did proper vetting, had 14 very good years out of the 15 I lived together with my exwife and it still failed. Her and I were a very good match.

And when @BeExcellent tells me she is going to vet better and select a top tier man the 2nd time and its going to be A-OK, I just shake my head.

"WTF am I supposed to do"????? ....oh yeah, be a better man! Be a top tier man. Because all of those executive's with the Bentley's parked outside the lounge at the Ritz Carlton on Saturday night hanging with their wives/friends are such great men. Schitt. I've hit on their wives(unknowingly) before. Those are some of the least happy marriages I know. One guy tried to offer his wife to me so he could continue flirting with some random girls seated at the bar. One of my buddies had a 3some with some "top tier" couple that night. Whenever I go to the high dollar bars/lounges where the top tier people congregate, I get more eye contact from married women than any other place I go to. These women have "frustration and unhappiness" written all over them. They are always the most eager for attention. You aren't going to convince me that these men/women are happy either. Being "top tier" does not fix these problems.
I know that you have mentioned this before, but my memory fails me. What caused you and your ex to divorce? Who came out on top? And is there anything that you could have done to prevent it?
 

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
Correct. Understand, I'm a business guy, you can't acquire RETURNS if you aren't willing to take calculated RISKS. But every decision needs to be thought out, planned, and based on facts, data, and logic.
Then I would encourage you to rethink that Camaro buy, as there are no benefits to such a purchase, only risks.
 

Bokanovsky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2012
Messages
4,826
Reaction score
4,503
In this day and age, marriage is a largely meaningless (but potentially very expensive) ritual. You can have a long-term relationship, kids and whatever else you desire without getting married. There is no social stigma or legal penalties for unwed couples anymore. I honestly don't understand why any man would want to get formally married these days.
 

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,413
Reaction score
1,817
Age
40
Location
The City
Because most people IGNORE the signs. As for the guys here who are divorced, they got divorced BEFORE they came here. And in case you haven’t noticed already, a lot of of the guys who come here were social outcasts for most of, if not all of their lives. Use some logic my dude. You can sense that just by reading the posts on here. Only autists can’t see that because of their lack of social skills. Which I suppose makes sense too, especially since a lot of dudes on here think that there’s only one way to get women just like autistic people.
Doesn't make Marriage SMART.

That is what we are talking about. Not the social skills of random SS members.

Doing all this work, vetting and deep analysis of the women you're f*cking just so you can sign an unnecessary CONTRACT seems idiotic to me.
 

Urbanyst

Banned
Joined
Jan 28, 2017
Messages
2,413
Reaction score
1,817
Age
40
Location
The City
Can we all cut the CRAP already?

I need @guru1000 and @BeExcellent to make a simple numbered list with reasons why marriage is SMART.

A numbered list like this:

1. Because (insert reason)
2. Because (insert reason)
3. Because (insert reason)

If you don't (or can't) do this.. you lose the argument. I can EASILY list why marriage is stupid so happy to take on the challenge if you want. I'm sure @Tenacity would be happy to as well.

Write your list guys. Simple, LOGICAL, FACT BASED, reasons why marriage is SMART.
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,726
Reaction score
6,711
Age
55
Can we all cut the CRAP already?

I need @guru1000 and @BeExcellent to make a simple numbered list with reasons why marriage is SMART.

A numbered list like this:

1. Because (insert reason)
2. Because (insert reason)
3. Because (insert reason)

If you don't (or can't) do this.. you lose the argument. I can EASILY list why marriage is stupid so happy to take on the challenge if you want. I'm sure @Tenacity would be happy to as well.

Write your list guys. Simple, LOGICAL, FACT BASED, reasons why marriage is SMART.
I can give you a list but you wouldn't accept it. The short version of FACTS is this:

1. Because marriage is the best environment for child rearing.
2. Because marriage confers tax advantages
3. Because married couples accumulate greater wealth
4. Because married men live longer

Those are some factual advantages that you can fact check.

There is a reason men here say only get serious with women who do not have divorce in the family. Has to do with family values & upbringing.

Yours is a larger problem. You think you can fit relationships into a logical frame work. Relationships, including marriage, are endeavors of emotion, not logic. Trying to put emotional endeavors into a logic frame is doomed to fail.

I'm not even going to talk about the benefits of intimacy and sexual monogamy. You can't comprehend those concepts.
 

sazc

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 23, 2016
Messages
4,502
Reaction score
3,429
Y'all realize that this thread is tenacitys wet fvcking dream, right?

Nothing satisfies him more then double digit pages of attention.
 

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
Can we all cut the CRAP already?

I need @guru1000 and @BeExcellent to make a simple numbered list with reasons why marriage is SMART.

A numbered list like this:

1. Because (insert reason)
2. Because (insert reason)
3. Because (insert reason)

If you don't (or can't) do this.. you lose the argument. I can EASILY list why marriage is stupid so happy to take on the challenge if you want. I'm sure @Tenacity would be happy to as well.

Write your list guys. Simple, LOGICAL, FACT BASED, reasons why marriage is SMART.
Not too smart, heh?

Marriage is an individual decision based on an individual's particular need and circumstance and how the potential marriage contender could meet such a need.

The most rudimentary example would be:

Man is insolvent and not likely to ever earn money. Contender is wealthy with assets. By getting married, he lives financially better.

This is an extreme example served as a hyperbole. Underneath this ceiling are thousands of other scenarios (a dozen already named in this thread) where marriage makes sense for the man and woman depending on each others' personal needs and circumstance.

Your question is stupid. And I don't even believe you are needlessly asking out of boredom. I just believe you don't have the mental intellect to grasp otherwise.
 
Last edited:

Tenacity

Banned
Joined
Jun 23, 2014
Messages
3,926
Reaction score
2,194
Can we all cut the CRAP already?

I need @guru1000 and @BeExcellent to make a simple numbered list with reasons why marriage is SMART.

A numbered list like this:

1. Because (insert reason)
2. Because (insert reason)
3. Because (insert reason)

If you don't (or can't) do this.. you lose the argument. I can EASILY list why marriage is stupid so happy to take on the challenge if you want. I'm sure @Tenacity would be happy to as well.

Write your list guys. Simple, LOGICAL, FACT BASED, reasons why marriage is SMART.
Lol, I'm going to help @guru1000 and @BeExcellent out. I'm going to fill in their side (benefits/why marriage would be smart). See below for the full breakdown:

#1.) Reason One - Marrying "Up": Marriage would be a smart decision and an overall "benefit" for the man, if it's based primarily on the man marrying "up" financially. So if the man makes $50,000 a year but the chick makes $200,000 a year with little to no debt, then the man is getting a very good deal out of this, especially if the man might be able to play a house-husband role, technically all of the leverage in Family Court shifts his way. Adding to this, if the chick is relatively decent looking without kids from another man, this makes the situation even better. This is technically @BeExcellent's marriage.

#2.) Reason Two - Business Promotion: Marriage would be a smart decision and overall "benefit" for the man, if the act of being married allows him to further his business or career directly from the act of being married. For example, it would be hard to run for a major political office without being married.

#3.) Reason Three - Citizenship: Marriage would be a smart decision and overall "benefit" for the man, if he is looking to gain citizenship.

#4.) Reason Four - Required Based On Family Network: Marriage would be a smart decision and overall "benefit" for the man, if it's a requirement from his family to continue receiving some sort of major family benefit, such as trust funds, taking over the family business, etc.

So in a nutshell, marriage is a smart decision and overall "benefit" for the man, if there's a direct financial or political gain that comes directly from the act of being married.

Note though, that these cases above will likely only apply to no more than 5% of men still left on the market that could potentially be married. Reason being is that women usually marry "up" and not "down", most men aren't looking for citizenship, most men aren't running for political office, and most family networks aren't setup to the point where you are required to marry in order to receive trust fund contributions.

So for the over 95% of other cases of men left on the market, marriage would not be a smart decision and overall "benefit" of the man. The man would be better off not entering a marriage contract. Also the raising of kids does not require a marriage contract, raising kids requires two decent parents along with a community that challenges and develops the kid(s) to grow into efficient adults.
 
Last edited:

guru1000

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
5,362
Reaction score
4,403
. Also the raising of kids does not require a marriage contract, raising kids requires two decent parents along with a community that challenges and develops the kid(s) to grow into efficient adults.
I would argue either way you are at risk: whether as a prenup and corporate structure getting set aside (through a marriage) holds the same probability as her seeking legal action outside of family court (in a non-marital relation). Both scenarios are unlikely, and in either scenario, if you have kids, you will still be responsible for child support.

This discussion is stupid. I'm losing brain cells. I'm out.
 

Tenacity

Banned
Joined
Jun 23, 2014
Messages
3,926
Reaction score
2,194
I would argue either way you are at risk: whether as a prenup and corporate structure getting set aside (through a marriage) holds the same probability as her seeking legal action outside of family court (in a non-marital relation). Both scenarios are unlikely, and in either scenario, if you have kids, you will still be responsible for child support.

This discussion is stupid. I'm losing brain cells. I'm out.
Child support is one thing.......child support AND alimony AND divorce settlements are another thing.
 

Tenacity

Banned
Joined
Jun 23, 2014
Messages
3,926
Reaction score
2,194
This discussion is stupid. I'm losing brain cells. I'm out.
Well, you have been the one on the campaign to CHANGE people's minds, remember? My purpose in this discussion was only to state my viewpoints on why I believe Marriage makes no sense whatsoever for the vast majority of men.

At this point, as I've now told you about 5 times now.......you need to just go get married. You believe in marriage, you want marriage, and you believe it's best for YOUR LIFE. Then go DO IT. Your campaign was fruitless, with the agenda to "change people's minds" about marriage, that makes no sense. As a contributor, your job is to put out all of the viewpoints/stances for why marriage would be beneficial to a man (which I honestly think you didn't do a good job of doing, my list above in ONE post did a better job than you did in 20 pages) and let the viewers decide what's best for their life.

Go get married Guru. I wish you luck (you're going to need it :rofl:)
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
4,726
Reaction score
6,711
Age
55
Y'all realize that this thread is tenacitys wet fvcking dream, right?

Nothing satisfies him more then double digit pages of attention.
Well the same could be said of any number of us here I suppose. :up::down::whistle:
 
Top