3-4 dates tommorow. How do I tell them i ain't paying?

[Kultam]

Err. I upped my net game and got 3-4 dates tommorow (i dont even remember) and i plan to give 1hr for each for a walk but i would like to go in some pub for beer for a moment however i cant pay for them and I dont even want to.

What you think? Is it okay "we can go inside but im not paying for you" to say it? Because of what men in society do, they will probably think im gonna buy them all drinks haha.

 

[Joji]

Bump.

 

[marmel75]

Err. I upped my net game and got 3-4 dates tommorow (i dont even remember) and i plan to give 1hr for each for a walk but i would like to go in some pub for beer for a moment however i cant pay for them and I dont even want to.

What you think? Is it okay "we can go inside but im not paying for you" to say it? Because of what men in society do, they will probably think im gonna buy them all drinks haha.

Lmao...if you cant afford to play then don't. Or take them somewhere that's free. If you want to make yourself look like a cheap ass then all I gotta say is good luck...

 

[devilkingx2]

Err. I upped my net game and got 3-4 dates tommorow (i dont even remember) and i plan to give 1hr for each for a walk but i would like to go in some pub for beer for a moment however i cant pay for them and I dont even want to.

What you think? Is it okay "we can go inside but im not paying for you" to say it? Because of what men in society do, they will probably think im gonna buy them all drinks haha.

heavily imply that they need to bring money and possibly even ask them to buy you something (non-seriously), don't let them think that they're gonna get a free meal if you aren't buying a free meal.

however if the girl seems like a sure thing, don't screw it up if she turns out to be a gold digger, just pay one night then smash and stop taking her calls (or let her know that only the first date is a freebie lol)

 

[Kultam]

Lmao...if you cant afford to play then don't. Or take them somewhere that's free. If you want to make yourself look like a cheap ass then all I gotta say is good luck...

Okay. Maybe that looks cheap. But imagine going on number of dates with random women.. You don't know if you are getting anything in return. Why would you pay? They are not your girlfriend, just some stranger female.

You are experienced member @marmel75 but doing something like that is not alpha. Also it's illogical.

 

[marmel75]

Okay. Maybe that looks cheap. But imagine going on number of dates with random women.. You don't know if you are getting anything in return. Why would you pay? They are not your girlfriend, just some stranger female.

You are experienced member @marmel75 but doing something like that is not alpha. Also it's illogical.

Buying a drink is illogical? Who is asking them on a date? You are. I'm not saying to pay for all the drinks...usually if they have any interest in you they will offer to get the second round.

Buying the first drink for a woman YOU asked out has nothing to do with being alpha or beta or any other nonsense. It has to do with social acuity and tact. Somthing the young generation sorely lacks these days.

If you cant afford to buy the first drink you shouldn't be worried about dating you should be worried about your finances.

 

[RangerMIke]

If you invited them out you should be prepared to pay. If they offer to cover their part, fine take it, otherwise you are the host... so be a host.

 

[wifehunter]

 

[Kultam]

Buying a drink is illogical? Who is asking them on a date? You are. I'm not saying to pay for all the drinks...usually if they have any interest in you they will offer to get the second round.

Buying the first drink for a woman YOU asked out has nothing to do with being alpha or beta or any other nonsense. It has to do with social acuity and tact. Somthing the young generation sorely lacks these days.

If you cant afford to buy the first drink you shouldn't be worried about dating you should be worried about your finances.

A lot of women nowadays agree for a date only so they can get a free drink and there are plenty guys out there on Online Dating that will buy them a drink everyday everytime if she agrees for a "date" with them.

Usually you don't know if your first date is a sl*t or if she's a good, calm book-orientated woman.

She could as well date 4 other guys the same day or week and they all offered to buy her a drink.

Whats the point in being one of them and wasting money with nothing in return?

I think its a woman who has no tact if she doesnt offer to pay. You don't owe her anything. She didn't have to agree to meet you.

To save money I usually offer a walk but they sometimes have the nerve to ask if we go for a drink (but they don't offer paying for their drink). And I prefer drinking than walking too, but as I said, if you date a lot, then that's huge money waste.

And yes, I invite them for a date, but I never call it date, I'm just saying we can meet.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

You simply say, "Hey, let's go in hear and you can buy me a drink". It'll go one way of the other. If the date's going well and you've given them company worth investing in, they'll agree. But some women get pretty funny about it; even my old female friend of like 15 years recently refused to buy me a drink when I had no cash on me. These are the types of women that you don't date / continue to date.

It's actually a fairly good early test of a woman's resolve. I might try it.

As an aside. Get a fckn job so you can start buying some drinks

 

[marmel75]

A lot of women nowadays agree for a date only so they can get a free drink and there are plenty guys out there on Online Dating that will buy them a drink everyday everytime if she agrees for a "date" with them.

Usually you don't know if your first date is a sl*t or if she's a good, calm book-orientated woman.

She could as well date 4 other guys the same day or week and they all offered to buy her a drink.

Whats the point in being one of them and wasting money with nothing in return?

I think its a woman who has no tact if she doesnt offer to pay. You don't owe her anything. She didn't have to agree to meet you.

To save money I usually offer a walk but they sometimes have the nerve to ask if we go for a drink (but they don't offer paying for their drink). And I prefer drinking than walking too, but as I said, if you date a lot, then that's huge money waste.

And yes, I invite them for a date, but I never call it date, I'm just saying we can meet.

This would be like saying "I want to live in this house, but how can I not pay the rent?"

 

[marmel75]

A lot of women nowadays agree for a date only so they can get a free drink and there are plenty guys out there on Online Dating that will buy them a drink everyday everytime if she agrees for a "date" with them.

Usually you don't know if your first date is a sl*t or if she's a good, calm book-orientated woman.

She could as well date 4 other guys the same day or week and they all offered to buy her a drink.

Whats the point in being one of them and wasting money with nothing in return?

I think its a woman who has no tact if she doesnt offer to pay. You don't owe her anything. She didn't have to agree to meet you.

To save money I usually offer a walk but they sometimes have the nerve to ask if we go for a drink (but they don't offer paying for their drink). And I prefer drinking than walking too, but as I said, if you date a lot, then that's huge money waste.

And yes, I invite them for a date, but I never call it date, I'm just saying we can meet.

Dude, we aren't talking about a dinner...we are talking about a drink. My God, what the hell has happened to guys these days? No wonder why so many of them have so much trouble getting laid.

 

[Alvafe]

This would be like saying "I want to live in this house, but how can I not pay the rent?"

open your legs if you are female?

 

[teebear]

If you asked them out, you pay. You look like a cheapskate otherwise.

This is not an issue of game. It's just good manners.

 

[Building_and_Loan]

If you're meeting a girl that YOU asked out, then pay for at least the first drink.

If she has any respect for you, she'll even offer to pay for herself or just won't rack up a huge bill on you. Just stay long enough to only have 1-2 drinks and you're good.

 

[SadoMasochrist]

Covert contracts THE THREAD.

"Hey I thought we'd jive because X, I'm a temporarily embarrassed millionaire. So I guess we're going to have a pretty scary time actually getting to know each other."

Get some BALLS.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

A lot of women nowadays agree for a date only so they can get a free drink and there are plenty guys out there on Online Dating that will buy them a drink everyday everytime if she agrees for a "date" with them.

Usually you don't know if your first date is a sl*t or if she's a good, calm book-orientated woman.

She could as well date 4 other guys the same day or week and they all offered to buy her a drink.

Whats the point in being one of them and wasting money with nothing in return.

Sounds like your issue is outcome dependency. It's obvious this has happened a lot to you in the past otherwise you wouldn't be complaining about it on here. Squash the AFC vibes, 2 out of your 4 will probably flake.
Nice work on scheduling them all on the same day?

 

[guru1000]

You are experienced member @marmel75 but doing something like that is not alpha. Also it's illogical.

Alpha is not subscribing to others' rules, and doing what you want. (This is not to be confused with doing what you want will lead to an effective outcome.)

IF a man wants to pay for a drink, but doesn't because he is afraid of how that would make him look, then he's a beta thinker.
IF a man doesn't want to pay for a drink, and does not care that the girl would think he's cheap, then he's an alpha thinker.

You have the term convoluted.

Alpha/Beta thinking deals with the intent & thinking, not the action.

 

[Kultam]

Alpha is not subscribing to others' rules, and doing what you want. (This is not to be confused with doing what you want will lead to an effective outcome.)

IF a man wants to pay for a drink, but doesn't because he is afraid of how that would make him look, then he's a beta thinker.
IF a man doesn't want to pay for a drink, and does not care that the girl would think he's cheap, then he's an alpha thinker.

You have the term convoluted.

Alpha/Beta thinking deals with the intent & thinking, not the action.

so cheap is alpha and paying is beta


(just joking)

Well I noticed paying for them makes it easier for you to score.

 

[devilkingx2]

I personally regard the few women who invite me to drink with them as unattractive. Women who pursue me invariably transform from a "8" to a "6".

"Women who actually like me and show it are unattractive"