Ex reaching out after months nc - how to turn into a lay?

[Scharhrot]

dated for 2 years, I dumped her like in Februaryish and been nc since then. a few weeks ago we ran into each other because of circumstances and it was awkward at first but then we started play fighting and got really into it and she grabbed my dihk and I grabbed her tiits etc but there was people around so nothing happend.

later that night she texted me for the first time since we broke up and we made small talk then I ended it cause I hate small talk. a week later she started tagging me in random stuff on Facebook three messaged me again and made more small talk etc but I ended it again after a few messages cause of above.

last night I got super drunk and actually texted her and now we've been making small talk again.

how do I turn this into a lay? I DO NOT want to get back together with her I just want to smash again tbh.

should I just straight up ask her to hang out tonight or what should I do?

 

[soulforge]

How many times are you intending to smash her? Once.. Twice?

You will fall back into a pattern with her, and chances are down the line it will end again

 

[Scharhrot]

How many times are you intending to smash her? Once.. Twice?

You will fall back into a pattern with her, and chances are down the line it will end again

not sure man I don't really think ahead I just go with the flow you know? and I highly doubt ill end up with her again i'm to aware of what kind of girl she is for that, and even if I did and we broke up again I really wouldnt care since breakups arent a big deal to me tbh.

 

[bigneil]

OP, don't listen to members who will say you need to avoid her.

Remember: You want to have sex with her again. That is your goal.

Here is how I did it in this situation:

0) Focus on self improvement
1) Wait for her to reach out (check)
2) Have a brief conversation (don't talk about the relationship or the breakup)
3) Touch upon some of your nostalgic memories (Example "hey I went to that restaurant we went to on our first date so I thought of you...")
4) End the conversation first
5) Bump into her (if possible) to rekindle the physical chemistry
6) Give her space (wait a few days between contact)
7) Invite her to spend the night with you (the bold move)
8) When you take her out, have a story about a new girl you are dating
9) Don't get jealous when she tells you about a new guy she is dating
10) Tell her you could fall in love with your new girl, but that in your heart you still want her
11) Make her orgasm
12) Be the person she fell in love with originally
13) Maintain the upper hand this time

 

[Scharhrot]

OP, don't listen to members who will say you need to avoid her.

Remember: You want to have sex with her again. That is your goal.

Here is how I did it in this situation:

0) Focus on self improvement - check
1) Wait for her to reach out (check)
2) Have a brief conversation (don't talk about the relationship or the breakup) - check

3) Touch upon some of your nostalgic memories (Example "hey I went to that restaurant we went to on our first date so I thought of you...")
4) End the conversation first- check

5) Bump into her (if possible) to rekindle the physical chemistry- check felt each other up a few weeks ago

6) Give her space (wait a few days between contact) - check

7) Invite her to spend the night with you (the bold move

so I'm on step 7 on your list. what's the best way to ask her out? just straight up say something like "let's hangout tonight." ?

 

[bigneil]

so I'm on step 7 on your list. what's the best way to ask her out? just straight up say something like "let's hangout tonight." ?

What I did effectively was to simultaneously have a text thread and an email thread, but I would shut my phone off in the middle of the text conversation., then not read my email for a while. That way you stay on her mind but give her space (chances are she needed more space to begin with). Be the person she fell in love with at the beginning, before there were any relationship terms. Make her wonder if you still want her.

Minimize the contact - have 2-3 conversations total, spread out over about 10 days.

Then, find a clever way to invite her on a date that has some connection to your previous dates.

Example: Did you go to a Marriot hotel one night? Get a different Marriot. Something that rekindles the romance but also something that is a new experience. That's why I picked a resort, when an ex and I had been to a bunch of resorts. Then, offer a date. Tell her "I'll be staying at the downtown Residence Inn on Friday or Saturday and dining at ABC Steakhouse if you'd like to meet me for dinner at 7:30". So you give her an option on which day, then you go with or without her. Be certain that there will be a chance for sex to happen. Don't meet her for lunch with her girlfriend, etc.

 

[Dash Riprock]

OP, don't listen to members who will say you need to avoid her.

Remember: You want to have sex with her again. That is your goal.

Here is how I did it in this situation:

0) Focus on self improvement
1) Wait for her to reach out (check)
2) Have a brief conversation (don't talk about the relationship or the breakup)
3) Touch upon some of your nostalgic memories (Example "hey I went to that restaurant we went to on our first date so I thought of you...")
4) End the conversation first
5) Bump into her (if possible) to rekindle the physical chemistry
6) Give her space (wait a few days between contact)
7) Invite her to spend the night with you (the bold move)
8) When you take her out, have a story about a new girl you are dating
9) Don't get jealous when she tells you about a new guy she is dating
10) Tell her you could fall in love with your new girl, but that in your heart you still want her
11) Make her orgasm
12) Be the person she fell in love with originally
13) Maintain the upper hand this time

I would nix #8 and #9. Sounds too immature, planned, and needy. The rest of the this is good.

 

[bigneil]

I would nix #8 and #9. Sounds too immature, planned, and needy. The rest of the this is good.

• Having a backup girl is not needy, it is essential. Your girl hopes you do.
• Assume she has a new guy and that she will test you.
• Don't bring it up unless she does.
• This can be the key to your getting laid. She throws down the King, you throw down the Ace.

 

[soulforge]

I agree with Niel.. If you don't care much about breaking up with her again.. Or don't have feels for her, then go ahead and smash her stupid..


If you where heavily invested or it was a painful breakup, then that's another ball game

 

[QuadDeuces]

How to turn your ex into a lay?

Let her know/without telling explicitly that youre banging other hotter chicks.

This is what got my ex back dripping wet.

 

[Juanto]

10) Tell her you could fall in love with your new girl, but that in your heart you still want her

This one is cringeworthy. Others I agree