Is it virtually impossible for a chick to actually like you for you.

[ChristopherColumbus]

Hmm depends what you mean. If you're talking about frame I see my girlfriend twice a week. We go out with my friends just as often as hers. I do pay our way a lot but then I earn twice as much as her and she does pay sometimes. I haven't given up any of my hobbies and in fact sometimes I go to her yoga class just because it's good for me and of course there's lots of chicks there in yoga pants.

In terms of relationship escalation well we know I won't marry again.

Do you see yourself spinning plates at 50?

OK, so a woman wants security but also has a tendency to 'monkey branch'. The DJ thinks this is women's 'inner contradiction'.

It's a catch 22. The woman will monkey branch at some point because it is her nature to OR.... is it more likely the woman will monkey branch because her DJ will not provide security because he thinks she will monkey branch?

This is what they call a self fulfilling prophecy.

The desire for certainty plays us false. At some point we have to exercise faith/ have confidence in a woman. But this needn't be blind confidence. We will observe of a woman whether her desire for security outweighs her nature, or whether she has developed a character that can control her fickle feelings.... or rather, whether she can be submit to you. It just goes to show how practical the old ways were.

 

[zekko]

So in your situation basically the risk is all on her. If it's doesn't work out she has to find a place to live.

She can certainly move out whenever she wants. I don't think of it so much as putting the risk on her as not giving away my power.
Because when you put the ring on her finger, you're not so much marrying her as getting ensared by the government, who then has ultimate say as to what happens to your resources in case of a divorce.

 

[Urbanyst]

"game" is nothing more than a wishful thinking cult "belief". You cannot "game" your way into having a chick "believe" you're something you aren't. She either likes you or she doesn't, despite "game" just like any chick can't "game" any man who isn't interested.

Money doesn't increase "options" unless you include chicks that will use you not only or whatever money you spend but will look to take you for all they can get.

Being "new" here might as well be saying less of an idiot.

If women aren't using you for MONEY, they are using you for something else.

You are naive as f*ck if you think women will give you something for nothing lol.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

If women aren't using you for MONEY, they are using you for something else.

You are naive as f*ck if you think women will give you something for nothing lol.

What else could they use you for besides money?

 

[Urbanyst]

What else could they use you for besides money?

• Attention
• Sperm if they want kids
• Status if you're good looking
• Ego boost
• Therapy to call you with her problems
• Connections
• Jobs
• Meals

If you are not making her life easier in some way, she won't be interested.

 

[Leisuresuitlegend]

Question is if DJ's are "aware" of women's "nature" and don't want to get married etc. and are just looking to "monkey branch" themselves why would they care about a chick monkey bran

If women aren't using you for MONEY, they are using you for something else.

You are naive as f*ck if you think women will give you something for nothing lol.

Nah it's beyond the realm of comprehension that a chick might not be using a dude. You take any negative trait possessed by humans in general and automatically assign them across the board as "constant absolute givens" to the opposite gender to suit your own deluded, insecure, paranoid mantra.

Get going your own way already.

 

[Urbanyst]

Question is if DJ's are "aware" of women's "nature" and don't want to get married etc. and are just looking to "monkey branch" themselves why would they care about a chick monkey bran


Nah it's beyond the realm of comprehension that a chick might not be using a dude. You take any negative trait possessed by humans in general and automatically assign them across the board as "constant absolute givens" to the opposite gender to suit your own deluded, insecure, paranoid mantra.

Get going your own way already.

Who said using people is a negative thing? YOU are the person assigning a negative quality to that behavior.

Everyone uses everyone. That is the foundation of all human relationships genius lol.

 

[Leisuresuitlegend]

Who said using people is a negative thing? YOU are the person assigning a negative quality to that behavior.

Everyone uses everyone. That is the foundation of all human relationships genius lol.

Not everyone "uses" everyone. You buy groceries from the store. You aren't "using" them nor are they "using" you because you are exchanging things like money for goods and or services. If your friends treat you to a night out you're only "using" them if you never reciprocate.

Nice try though. I'm not buying it.

 

[Urbanyst]

Not everyone "uses" everyone. You buy groceries from the store. You aren't "using" them nor are they "using" you because you are exchanging things like money for goods and or services. If your friends treat you to a night out you're only "using" them if you never reciprocate.

Nice try though. I'm not buying it.

What you "buy" has no baring on the truth lol.

Exchanging goods for services is a form of using. You are using the store for food and the store is using you to make profits. Its an even exchange.. but both parties are benefiting from it.

The point is.. no one engages in a relationship where they have NOTHING to gain. People use other people. When your friends treat you.. they are using you for companionship, ego and bonding.They are also appealing to your loyalty in hopes you might treat them some day in the future.

There are no unconditional relationships. People have to gain something out of the relationship for THEMSELVES. Its actually pretty breathtaking that you don't understand this lol.

 

[Leisuresuitlegend]

What you "buy" has no baring on the truth lol.

Exchanging goods for services is a form of using. You are using the store for food and the store is using you to make profits. Its an even exchange.. but both parties are benefiting from it.

The point is.. no one engages in a relationship where they have NOTHING to gain. People use other people. When your friends treat you.. they are using you for companionship, ego and bonding.They are also appealing to your loyalty in hopes you might treat them some day in the future.

There are no unconditional relationships. People have to gain something out of the relationship for THEMSELVES. Its actually pretty breathtaking that you don't understand this lol.

You can flip it anyway you'd like practicing your mental gymnastics but there's a reason for the definition of someone who uses you and the definition of reciprocation.

You fail at using your own brain.

 

[Urbanyst]

You can flip it anyway you'd like practicing your mental gymnastics but there's a reason for the definition of someone who uses you and the definition of reciprocation.

You fail at using your own brain.

Whatever dude. You're just mad because you got nailed lol.

 

[Fruitbat]

Ever hear the saying "You shouldn't marry for love"? There's a lot of truth to that.

It's not enough to find someone you "like", or who likes you. You have to find someone whose goals are compatible with yours. In your case, that would entail not wanting anything serious (I guess). In my case, they have to be okay with not having kids, and with not getting married. Believe it or not, they're out there.

Definately true. I am dating a chick I have zero in common with except for almost identical shared goals....well, I told her my plans and she is very keen on them.

My current GF is Asian, student, very little in common except wanting a family and both being easy going people who put family first.

My friends were like "NOO! You need to find the person you want to spend time with...then if things happen, they happen!"

This is the WRONG way from my experience. There are several couples in my group where one partner wants kids, the other doesn't. Sometimes it's the guy, other cases the woman. I told them along the lines of "if you have the same goals, the rest falls into line, you make it work"......I just cannot see how going for the "soul mate" can work...how can this approach yield results? I bend sometimes to the whim of my partner, other times a partner yields to you. I gave up on finding the "One true love" a long time ago and I now want someone who isn't insane, wants the same thing as me and is easy going enough to compramise. Then, you might find years later that THAT was the real meaning of compatibility...not that you just like the same comedian or like the same political party. Which is more important?