I failed miserably when texting this girl

[superstorm2500]

she's still answering everything and talking so where did you fail

Did you not read what everyone else said and the part where I said that after I reply to her, I've seen that she updates her story on Snapchat and shares things on Facebook, so she sees my text but doesn't send me a response back until hours later. That's a bad sign, today after I replied to her, it took 8 hours before she sent another response and she updated her Snapchat story throughout the day, so she did see it before then.

 

[Konada]

You already failed from the 3rd exchange onwards I didn't have to read to know how it was going go down.

Do you tell your buddies about your life? I think not. Even a dude receiving your messages would tell you to stfu because that's how you're coming across to the girl - annoying.

Just talk like a normal human being and ask her out. She had interest but you killed it by being the lonely grandma that keeps talking to random people at the park.

 

[17 shots]

Did you not read what everyone else said and the part where I said that after I reply to her, I've seen that she updates her story on Snapchat and shares things on Facebook, so she sees my text but doesn't send me a response back until hours later. That's a bad sign, today after I replied to her, it took 8 hours before she sent another response and she updated her Snapchat story throughout the day, so she did see it before then.

You were taking hours to respond too, so don't be in your feelings when she does it back. And a chick responding is all that matters. Who cares how long she took. She has other guys to talk to, you won't have all of her attention from the jump

 

[marmel75]

Did you not read what everyone else said and the part where I said that after I reply to her, I've seen that she updates her story on Snapchat and shares things on Facebook, so she sees my text but doesn't send me a response back until hours later. That's a bad sign, today after I replied to her, it took 8 hours before she sent another response and she updated her Snapchat story throughout the day, so she did see it before then.

WE told you to hit her up with a few short texts and then ask her out...

What do yo do? Ignore the advice, text her your life story and then come back here and tell us how you failed miserbaly.

Well, no sh!t.

 

[superstorm2500]

You were taking hours to respond too, so don't be in your feelings when she does it back. And a chick responding is all that matters. Who cares how long she took. She has other guys to talk to, you won't have all of her attention from the jump

I only did that because she started doing it first, I didn't want to come off as too eager/needy by responding quicker than she was. I think that she was trying to distance herself from the conversation, I know that I'm not the only guy that she has to talk to but I think she was only responding out of courtesy, she has read receipts turned on after all so I can see when she opens my message and that probably has something to do with her continued responses.

 

[superstorm2500]

WE told you to hit her up with a few short texts and then ask her out...

What do yo do? Ignore the advice, text her your life story and then come back here and tell us how you failed miserbaly.

Well, no sh!t.

It wasn't that easy, this girl and her 17 year old niece who I know for a fact does like me, are always together and even share a bedroom with each other. If I asked her to hang out that fast, she was gonna assume it as a "just friends" hang out and bring her niece. Especially since they were both talking about hanging out together once the work season ended. And she's 20 so its not like I can separate the two of them by grabbing a drink with her.

 

[superstorm2500]

You already failed from the 3rd exchange onwards I didn't have to read to know how it was going go down.

Do you tell your buddies about your life? I think not. Even a dude receiving your messages would tell you to stfu because that's how you're coming across to the girl - annoying.

Just talk like a normal human being and ask her out. She had interest but you killed it by being the lonely grandma that keeps talking to random people at the park.

Yeah I know I did, and I feel like sh*t because I ruined everything so badly with that one poor texting performance that its un-salvageable now. For my whole life, I've had very low confidence when it comes to dating and girls. I've always assumed that I would be rejected every time so I never tried to approach a girl or ask her out, because I felt rejection was going to happen every time and that I should should just save myself from the embarrassment of being rejected and just never approach or ask any girl. Obviously I know that you have to risk rejection every time you ask a girl out, so I think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl on purpose in order to reject myself so that I wouldn't have to face it from her. I saw a lot of the mistakes I was making and knew that they were the wrong moves, but I made them anyway for the reason that I just said. Then I also get angered and offended when other people tell me that they think I can get girls, so I also think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl in order to prove to them that I can't get girls, if that makes any sense.

 

[Konada]

It wasn't that easy, this girl and her 17 year old niece who I know for a fact does like me, are always together and even share a bedroom with each other. If I asked her to hang out that fast, she was gonna assume it as a "just friends" hang out and bring her niece. Especially since they were both talking about hanging out together once the work season ended. And she's 20 so its not like I can separate the two of them by grabbing a drink with her.

She will only assume its a friends thing only if you have already been acting like a friend from the start. If she asks to bring her cousin along tell her you'd prefer it to be just the two of you.

Either she will flake or agree. Your job as a man is the make the date and wait for her to accept or reject. Anything else more is just fluff.

In order to stop yourself from making the same mistake again, follow this template until you have at least went out with 15 girls.

You: Hey, xxx here

HB: Hi!

You: Hey HB, hope you're doing well. How's your week coming along?

HB: Blahblah, good. You?

You: Pretty good. Anyway I'd like you to meet me for a drink this Sunday at xxx bar at 8pm. Will you meet me there?

 

[OJN_98]

I've had girls hook up with me using a different and quicker approach, so don't tell me that I'm lying to myself because I know the difference. And no I don't take what you say personally because I know that I messed up bad with this girl, #6 specifically because I knew that I was going to fail as soon as I started with this girl. I knew what she was doing and I did what I did because I knew I was going to fail anyway. Going back over the texts now, I can see how it started with her reacting more positively in the beginning but quickly devolved into her being done with me. Only I will not be there for her validation and will ignore her if she wants attention. And if you were trying to label me as a nice guy there at the end, then try again. I'm not a doormat to anyone, especially girls that I'm attracted to.

You talk wayyyyy too much, my man. On top of that, it seems like you're lacking self confidence and covering it by explaining yourself when people are just trying to help you. The denial is real.

 

[superstorm2500]

She will only assume its a friends thing only if you have already been acting like a friend from the start. If she asks to bring her cousin along tell her you'd prefer it to be just the two of you.

Either she will flake or agree. Your job as a man is the make the date and wait for her to accept or reject. Anything else more is just fluff.

In order to stop yourself from making the same mistake again, follow this template until you have at least went out with 15 girls.

You: Hey, xxx here

HB: Hi!

You: Hey HB, hope you're doing well. How's your week coming along?

HB: Blahblah, good. You?

You: Pretty good. Anyway I'd like you to meet me for a drink this Sunday at xxx bar at 8pm. Will you meet me there?

Well I think I failed to the point that things with her can't be fixed now, so I'm planning on never texting her again. And like I just said in my reply that you quoted, she's 20 and we're in the US where the drinking age is 21 so I can't take her out for a drink. And since she can't go to places that are 21+, that makes it harder. And saying that I would prefer it be just the two of us would not go over well, her and her niece are very close and she even found her unconscious after she tried to commit suicide and saved her. So saying I'd rather her not be there would blow up in my face.

 

[superstorm2500]

You talk wayyyyy too much, my man. On top of that, it seems like you're lacking self confidence and covering it by explaining yourself when people are just trying to help you. The denial is real.

Yes I am lacking self confidence and I admit that, did you not see what I put in one of my previous replies?

"For my whole life, I've had very low confidence when it comes to dating and girls. I've always assumed that I would be rejected every time so I never tried to approach a girl or ask her out, because I felt rejection was going to happen every time and that I should should just save myself from the embarrassment of being rejected and just never approach or ask any girl. Obviously I know that you have to risk rejection every time you ask a girl out, so I think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl on purpose in order to reject myself so that I wouldn't have to face it from her. I saw a lot of the mistakes I was making and knew that they were the wrong moves, but I made them anyway for the reason that I just said. Then I also get angered and offended when other people tell me that they think I can get girls, so I also think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl in order to prove to them that I can't get girls, if that makes any sense."

 

[marmel75]

She will only assume its a friends thing only if you have already been acting like a friend from the start. If she asks to bring her cousin along tell her you'd prefer it to be just the two of you.

Either she will flake or agree. Your job as a man is the make the date and wait for her to accept or reject. Anything else more is just fluff.

In order to stop yourself from making the same mistake again, follow this template until you have at least went out with 15 girls.

You: Hey, xxx here

HB: Hi!

You: Hey HB, hope you're doing well. How's your week coming along?

HB: Blahblah, good. You?

You: Pretty good. Anyway I'd like you to meet me for a drink this Sunday at xxx bar at 8pm. Will you meet me there?

Neither is old enough to go to a bar.

 

[marmel75]

Yes I am lacking self confidence and I admit that, did you not see what I put in one of my previous replies?

"For my whole life, I've had very low confidence when it comes to dating and girls. I've always assumed that I would be rejected every time so I never tried to approach a girl or ask her out, because I felt rejection was going to happen every time and that I should should just save myself from the embarrassment of being rejected and just never approach or ask any girl. Obviously I know that you have to risk rejection every time you ask a girl out, so I think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl on purpose in order to reject myself so that I wouldn't have to face it from her. I saw a lot of the mistakes I was making and knew that they were the wrong moves, but I made them anyway for the reason that I just said. Then I also get angered and offended when other people tell me that they think I can get girls, so I also think that I subconsciously messed things up with this girl in order to prove to them that I can't get girls, if that makes any sense."

Why do you care what some random woman thinks about you so much? If you get rejected, so what?

 

[SmooveMooves]

Okay, so you fūcked up bad here. Yes this cannot be salvaged. Save yourself some self-respect and just move on. But here's what you can learn from this.


Here are general texting rules that can prevent you from ever making the texting mistake again.


- Keep texting short

Texting is not the same as talking and should be treated as such. Serious topics (unless its her sending the paragraphs) should always be avoided. If it's not logistics or fun and flirty you should not be texting. Rule of thumb: Your texts should rarely be longer than three lines. Make everything you say concise and to the point

-Keep texting short

Yes it's here twice. The first one is referring to actual text length, this one refers to the length of time you text. Never text a woman all day. Texting with plates should consist of small short stimulating conversations usually initiated by her. When you get that random midday "hey" humor her for a bit and if you dont see a way to finesse a meet up stop replying. Do not let a woman get into the habit of expecting a good morning/night message or reply. It's okay occasionally but she should never expect it. Rule of thumb: End on Highnote. Conversations usually reach a point of climax where the main point has been discussed and either someone needs to change the topic or come from a different angle. End conversations here by not replying. There is nothing better than a good joke or playful banter and then vanishing. Her last memory of you will be positive.

-Don't use emojis, "lol" or exclamation marks unless the situation really calls for it. (Which is pretty much never)

You are not some bubbling idiot excited to be talking to a girl. Certainly the conversation is not so entertaining that you are laughing at every text. Rule of thumb: Don't use "lol" unless you actually laugh out loud. And I don't mean a snicker or chuckle. I mean a ha ha ha laugh. Most of the time when people type "lol" or use an emoji there isn't a hint of an expression on their face. Just like now, while you read this with that voice in your head, with a straight face... See.

-Match her reply time. 2 hr. Limit

If she takes 5 mins to text back. You take 7. She's takes 10 you take 13. These aren't hardlined rules that need to be followed to the T. Just guides. Obviously if the conversation is freaky and she's talking about how she's gonna blow you reply right away. Basically this rule boils down to don't be the guy who has absolutely nothing going on and replies the second he get's a message. If a woman's messages are coming in at 30-45 mins apart, the time you reply needs to be doubled if you reply at all. Rule of thumb: If a woman takes longer than 2 hours to reply to your message don't reply at all. She needs to reinitiate. Eventually, she will learn what behavior keeps your attention and behave accordingly.

- Speak like a real human being

I never understood why sometimes you guys are so wordy. Your texts messages shouldn't look like you just got off of diction.com in search of synonyms to really express your feelings. Keep it short and simple to ensure she knows exactly what you mean. Your vocabulary does not impress a woman, even the geeky ones. Rule of thumb: 'I am going to fūck you tonight' will always be more of a turn on than 'tonight we'll be passionate' 9 times out of 10. Life isn't a highschool romcom.

 

[RangerMIke]

Okay.....

The FAILURE came in you listening to cartoonish advice on the Manosphere, about waiting an extremely longggggggg time after getting a chick's number to call/text/start communicating. Chicks have a low attention span these days, if you guys really think you are going to get a chick's number on Monday and not communicate with her until Saturday, AND the same level of interest is going to be there........you are seriously deluding yourselves.

I agree. Contact her when you want. Waiting will help you with chicks that really like you, but if they are on the fence.

 

[SuckItUp]

It wasn't that easy, this girl and her 17 year old niece who I know for a fact does like me, are always together and even share a bedroom with each other. If I asked her to hang out that fast, she was gonna assume it as a "just friends" hang out and bring her niece. Especially since they were both talking about hanging out together once the work season ended. And she's 20 so its not like I can separate the two of them by grabbing a drink with her.

It is that easy.

Think about two salesmen. One goes into every potential sale thinking anything is possible. The other goes into the sale feeling that he doubts things are going to happen.

Who do you think will sell more?

You are making an excuse out of fear. Guess what she may just want to be friends or she want to do the tubesteak boogie. Not every girl is interested and you can't force chemistry.

By not simply trying to make a date your chances went from x% to zero. Is it possible that your chances were poor to begin with? Sure, but wouldn't you want to have 25% chance rather than 0%.

Alll the time you spent working on something with no chance means time that is wasted on someone where you may have a decent/excellent chance.

 

[Tenacity]

You talk wayyyyy too much, my man.

WE told you to hit her up with a few short texts and then ask her out...

- Keep texting short

-Don't use emojis, "lol" or exclamation marks unless the situation really calls for it. (Which is pretty much never)

I can only imagine that if I were a newbie, not out here meeting/managing women everyday, and ONLY had the information from this website to rely on in terms of information on how to best handle women..........I would be WORSE OFF than if I never came here at all.

Look at the silly fvcking advice you guys keep giving out.

- When you get a number, don't call/text for 3 - 7 days
- Never text at all
- When you text, never use emojis or "lol", keep it short
- When you call/text, keep communicate short, only push for the date

WHAT in the flying FVCK kind of advice is this?? You can't tell me you guys are out here dating Millennial women, you can't. This is how the shyt really goes...........

- If you get her number Monday at 2:00 p.m., you better be texting her by 8:00 p.m. the same day if you want her to remember who the hell you are.

- LEARN to text, text, text, and text your life away because you will be doing a lot of it. Learn to use emojis, "lol", "lmao", and all of the shyt us Millennials say/communicate when texting/speaking on social media.

- Then, make sure you add phone calls in there.......longgggg phone calls that go 30 - 90 minutes sometimes, where you and her just "kick in" and discuss a variety of things from serious topics, to intelligent topics, to romantic topics, to sexual/phone caking, etc.

After all of that, once you guys start to do the in person dates/live meets, you will already have a great rapport build up with the woman. Plus, you are LESS LIKELY to even get a date/live meet with a chick without going through the telephone/texting process.

That's the truth based from the field, I have no flying clue what these other guys are talking about.

 

[devilkingx2]

I definitely dropped the ball when I texted this girl, we met while we were working together at a summer job at the county fair. I feel like there was some chemistry between us, so I spent more time working with her and joking around with her and I found out that she loves pandas so I won her a couple of stuffed pandas from the carnival games, but I didn't just give them to her. She's extremely shy so I made her do a couple things at work to break her out of her comfort zone as a way to tease/bust on her. Some of my other coworkers also said one day that they kept catching her looking at me, and on our last day, she came over to work with me even though there was a million other things to do and my coworkers said they noticed that she had a smile on her face the whole time she was working with me. So our work season ended and I texted her about 8 days after our last day of work, which was our first time talking since then. And I think its pretty safe to say that I failed miserably when I was texting her, I don't think she's even into me anymore if she was in the first place. She barely responds now and I noticed that after I've sent a reply to her, she updates her story on Snapchat or shares things on Facebook, but doesn't send me a response back. So she sees my text, and is deliberately waiting a very long time to respond, obviously that's a bad sign and an indication of failure. (In the texts, I talk about video games because she loves playing them. Otherwise I wouldn't)

the problems I've seen with all of your texts:

1. you don't really flirt, you don't tease her or get playful, you don't use innuendo or mention anything sexual, etc. I used to have this problem too for years, you're just exchanging information you're not acting like you're trying to get into her pants

2. your conversation isn't really interesting, I learned a long time ago to not actually ever tell people what I'm doing for real because your actual life is most likely not interesting, so when someone goes "wyd" in july I respond "christmas tree shopping, you?", when someone goes "what's your major" I respond "dank memeology" when someone asks me where I work, I say "part time strip club part time magic mike 3 filming"

whenever I get a chance, I tell exciting mildly embellished stories about that one time me and my friend got jumped in the hood but we fought them off 2v6

you gotta have these hoes in the shower thinking about the things you said later on, wondering how one man can be so absolutely insane but also interesting at the same time.

3. she's clearly not interested, she only ever says the bare minimum, never adds to the conversation, we don't learn anything about her through reading your pictures, she's either the world's most boring person or she can barely stomach you. (probably both)

 

[Tenacity]

Well I think I failed........

Also stop talking about "you failed" as if you were trying to close a deal, didn't show up to the meeting on time or (insert another major mistake you made here) and it led to them choosing a competitor over your company.

There is NO FAILURE when it comes to women. NONE. Why do I say this?

- Because unlike business deals, or job opportunities, you NEVER run out of opportunities to get new women, new dates, and new pvssy.

- There is NEVER a one-size-fits-all approach to women. You need to find out what your personality is and embrace it. You might be more calm, cool, collected, and quiet. Versus Tenacity, which is more loud, aggressive, and class clownish. There's no RIGHT or wrong way to "behave".

- Fix your looks and finances.......then in terms of personality, just make sure you are a sociable person, even if you are more introverted by nature. From there, play the numbers game. You approach 20 women, get 12 numbers, get 6 dates, and fvck 3 of them.

That's it. Nothing else to this. Also like I pointed out before, ignore the advice from these guys about not texting, not calling, and/or texting-calling for a very short period of time. That advice is stupid.

 

[devilkingx2]

I can only imagine that if I were a newbie, not out here meeting/managing women everyday, and ONLY had the information from this website to rely on in terms of information on how to best handle women..........I would be WORSE OFF than if I never came here at all.

Look at the silly fvcking advice you guys keep giving out.

- When you get a number, don't call/text for 3 - 7 days
- Never text at all
- When you text, never use emojis or "lol", keep it short
- When you call/text, keep communicate short, only push for the date

WHAT in the flying FVCK kind of advice is this?? You can't tell me you guys are out here dating Millennial women, you can't. This is how the shyt really goes...........

- If you get her number Monday at 2:00 p.m., you better be texting her by 8:00 p.m. the same day if you want her to remember who the hell you are.

- LEARN to text, text, text, and text your life away because you will be doing a lot of it. Learn to use emojis, "lol", "lmao", and all of the shyt us Millennials say/communicate when texting/speaking on social media.

- Then, make sure you add phone calls in there.......longgggg phone calls that go 30 - 90 minutes sometimes, where you and her just "kick in" and discuss a variety of things from serious topics, to intelligent topics, to romantic topics, to sexual/phone caking, etc.

After all of that, once you guys start to do the in person dates/live meets, you will already have a great rapport build up with the woman. Plus, you are LESS LIKELY to even get a date/live meet with a chick without going through the telephone/texting process.

That's the truth based from the field, I have no flying clue what these other guys are talking about.

I think texting is like speaking spanish, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it, but if you're not good at it... don't do it.

the advice to avoid texting is usually improperly framed when people give it, it's supposed to be more like "don't text unless you're a good texter, because it's better to rarely text than to make a fool of yourself over text" and @EyeBRollin once pointed out that if you train a girl to text and call you all the time, you'll have to maintain it once you've set the standard

I personally think that not texting girls will lose you way too many girls for it to be a good idea, however at the same time if you're an awful texter you'll lose even more girls by texting than by not texting (kind of like how if you're fat with a beer gut, taking your shirt off at the beach won't do you any favors, but that's not because taking your shirt off at the beach is worse than not doing so)