After an epic run to kick off 2017, I thought I had the game totally figured out. Women were awesome. I was a God. I literally couldn't lose.
But in the past month & a half, I've hit a major rough patch. In that time, I've met probably 8 top-shelf girls (which is an insane amount for me over such a short time period). Girls who I really liked, had instant chemistry with & who really, really liked me--the night/day we met. But same night logistics weren't workable with any of them--so 8 really solid numbers that I knew would come through.
And all of them flaked.
Or quit responding, or flaked & reinitiated contact & disappeared again. And one of them flaked, came over later, and put up so much LMR & ASD that I wrote her off & didn't respond when she hit me up again.
This wasn't supposed to happen. I was happier than I'd ever been. I had abundance. I wasn't needy & the first 5 or 6 didn't even put a dent in my frame. But yesterday, I noticed myself slipping into negative thoughts that I thought I'd put behind me: Women are b1tches. The market sucks. Women are just wh0res. Maybe I should wife up the next one that sticks around. They have so much abundance that I just don't even register as a real human being to them. Maybe I'm just not good enough. I've worked so hard on myself--these girls don't even deserve me.
But this time, I recognized those thoughts. I'd had them before--at 20 when I had my first girl break my heart & didn't even talk to another girl for a year. At 21, after my first go at spinning plates fell apart & right before I met my BPDex & got sucked into her web of idealization & the promise of unconditional love. At 24, when she violently pushed me off that pedestal. Last spring, when my favorite rebound cut me off. Last summer when I hit a string of very near misses.
But you know what happened each time? After I accepted the situation, dusted myself off & got back in the saddle, good things started happening for me. I met cool girls; I had awesome flings; I grew as a person & came back stronger and better equipped to deal with those situations in the future.
No one likes to talk about their losses--but they show you the lessons you need to learn & force you to improve your relationship with yourself. So what's next? Well, I'll go out the next 3 nights and maybe I'll meet better women--or maybe I won't. I think I still have a shot with 3 of those numbers & I'm a generous guy, so I'll shoot them texts next week & get in some practice at flipping these situations. Maybe they'll come through--or maybe they won't.
But we all (lord willing) still have years ahead of us to figure this stuff out. We all have adventures ahead of us--some good, some bad. And we all have a choice: To complain about how life should be, or to accept life how it is. To be the victim, or the author of your fate. To repeat ineffective behaviors, or experiment with new behaviors. To focus on the good, or to focus on the bad. To next girls the first time your ego gets threatened, or to see if there's anything left for us to learn from them. To stagnate, or to grow.
But in the past month & a half, I've hit a major rough patch. In that time, I've met probably 8 top-shelf girls (which is an insane amount for me over such a short time period). Girls who I really liked, had instant chemistry with & who really, really liked me--the night/day we met. But same night logistics weren't workable with any of them--so 8 really solid numbers that I knew would come through.
And all of them flaked.
Or quit responding, or flaked & reinitiated contact & disappeared again. And one of them flaked, came over later, and put up so much LMR & ASD that I wrote her off & didn't respond when she hit me up again.
This wasn't supposed to happen. I was happier than I'd ever been. I had abundance. I wasn't needy & the first 5 or 6 didn't even put a dent in my frame. But yesterday, I noticed myself slipping into negative thoughts that I thought I'd put behind me: Women are b1tches. The market sucks. Women are just wh0res. Maybe I should wife up the next one that sticks around. They have so much abundance that I just don't even register as a real human being to them. Maybe I'm just not good enough. I've worked so hard on myself--these girls don't even deserve me.
But this time, I recognized those thoughts. I'd had them before--at 20 when I had my first girl break my heart & didn't even talk to another girl for a year. At 21, after my first go at spinning plates fell apart & right before I met my BPDex & got sucked into her web of idealization & the promise of unconditional love. At 24, when she violently pushed me off that pedestal. Last spring, when my favorite rebound cut me off. Last summer when I hit a string of very near misses.
But you know what happened each time? After I accepted the situation, dusted myself off & got back in the saddle, good things started happening for me. I met cool girls; I had awesome flings; I grew as a person & came back stronger and better equipped to deal with those situations in the future.
No one likes to talk about their losses--but they show you the lessons you need to learn & force you to improve your relationship with yourself. So what's next? Well, I'll go out the next 3 nights and maybe I'll meet better women--or maybe I won't. I think I still have a shot with 3 of those numbers & I'm a generous guy, so I'll shoot them texts next week & get in some practice at flipping these situations. Maybe they'll come through--or maybe they won't.
But we all (lord willing) still have years ahead of us to figure this stuff out. We all have adventures ahead of us--some good, some bad. And we all have a choice: To complain about how life should be, or to accept life how it is. To be the victim, or the author of your fate. To repeat ineffective behaviors, or experiment with new behaviors. To focus on the good, or to focus on the bad. To next girls the first time your ego gets threatened, or to see if there's anything left for us to learn from them. To stagnate, or to grow.
