Giving girl space to chase you

[EmotionalGeek]

There is concept od giving girl space to chase or so that she does not take you for granted. I wonder how do you do it in practice.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Limit your availability, ignore some texts and be slow to answer most. Simply don't answer an occasional question she asks in-person.

Essentially, project that she's not such a big deal to you. In order to offset this, show extreme affection occasionally and by surprise. This will make her addicted to obtaining that special treat.

I find that if I project that I'm by no means head over heels with her, and am a bit on the fence, but then give her occasional super-affectionate experiences, I've got the right formula to keep her interested and craving more of me.

 

[sazc]

Limit your availability, ignore some texts and be slow to answer most. Simply don't answer an occasional question she asks in-person.

Essentially, project that she's not such a big deal to you. In order to offset this, show extreme affection occasionally and by surprise. This will make her addicted to obtaining that special treat.

I find that if I project that I'm by no means head over heels with her, and am a bit on the fence, but then give her occasional super-affectionate experiences, I've got the right formula to keep her interested and craving more of me.

Any female who responds as described to the type of treatment detailed above is a female with serious issues, and is going to end up being a headache in the long run.

Good luck with all that.

 

[wifehunter]

Be busy...other girls, career, hobbies, travel, etc. They fall in love, when they are missing you! Child's play! see: hide and seek

 

[Atom Smasher]

Actually, the direct opposite is true. By utilizing the above formula, I have unlocked the secret to my success with higher-quality women.

The issue here is that you, a woman, are reacting (not responding, but reacting) emotionally and completely missing what exactly I'm saying. You are feeling in extremes, and not perceiving the nuanced handling of what I describe above.

No need to wish me luck. It works wonders and has turned me from a clueless loser with women to a success by anyone's standards. The women I deal with consider me to me off-the-charts kind, thoughtful, considerate, strong, loving, dependable, etc. The needle in the haystack. T'ain't braggin' if it's true!

This post is by no means a defense, but rather a clarification for men who are reading this. You see how the woman reacts out of lack of understanding. This is why you must be very wary of taking a woman's advice on relationships. They do not understand our realities and they do not understand the difference between what they think they want vs. what they positively respond to.

The methods used here at SS are presented in a formulaic, concrete way as must be in written form. The men who succeed here are the men who consider the proposed formulas, modify them to their personality, and use them in an intentional, nuanced fashion. Those who fail consider them to be concrete axioms that must not be deviated from. All tips here are training wheels for men to use and customize to their own style until the training wheels become integrated character traits that are beneficial to an actualized man and those who are within his sphere.

 

[sazc]

Lol, I can hear it now...

"I ignored and responded slowly to texts slowly, limited t availability, played aloof and then showed extreme affection (sent signals like I only wanted her physically) and she eventually stopped responding to me all together. I did everything you said and she dumped me, why?"

"She's a branch swinger"
"She's riding the c0ck carousel"
Etc
Etc
Etc

Someone JUST posted a thread literally saying they practiced all of these "techniques" and the female started to feel insecure and pull away.

Girls with self esteem (you know, the kind that offer sanity and stability) ain't gonna respond to this BS. But have at it!

 

[Juanto]

Agree with Atom Smasher, i´ve had similar experiences as the one he described. Just ignore sazc on this subject and men reading this will be fine.

 

[Atom Smasher]

 

[lizardking82]

Lol, I can hear it now...

"I ignored and responded slowly to texts slowly, limited t availability, played aloof and then showed extreme affection (sent signals like I only wanted her physically) and she eventually stopped responding to me all together. I did everything you said and she dumped me, why?"

"She's a branch swinger"
"She's riding the c0ck carousel"
Etc
Etc
Etc

Someone JUST posted a thread literally saying they practiced all of these "techniques" and the female started to feel insecure and pull away.

Girls with self esteem (you know, the kind that offer sanity and stability) ain't gonna respond to this BS. But have at it!

You miss out his point because you miss out the important details about it. He says occasionally, swing the mood of the relationship and this is very true. I am only 23 years old and have not had a ****load of experiences, but in the ones I have had, I have noticed that creating artificial mood swings in a LTR after the initial honey moon that creates them naturally is over, is crucial. Anytime I did not do that, I ended up losing the girl.

 

[wifehunter]

The "giving people space" idea is thousands of years old.

"Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor’s house, lest he have his fill of you and hate you."

- ESV

 

[Trump]

Limit your availability, ignore some texts and be slow to answer most. Simply don't answer an occasional question she asks in-person.

I don't think I agree with this. Instead of "limiting your availability" and "ignoring her texts" while you are watching tv, why don't you just be legitimately busy and respond accordingly?

This is where I think the site messes up in its message. It sometimes says we should outsmart the girl by playing games and not being so available, which is ridiculous. Just be great for society and let her see how great you are for herself. Ignoring her texts or pretending to be busy won't increase her interest level and you are only fooling yourself.

Essentially, project that she's not such a big deal to you. In order to offset this, show extreme affection occasionally and by surprise. This will make her addicted to obtaining that special treat.

I don't know, it may work for you guys. But if I like a girl and want to sleep with her, I make her feel like the most important girl in the world. That doesn't mean to submit, act desperate, act like she is the only girl in the world. But I won't purposely ignore texts and act aloof so it may or may not turn her on. I will go full force so she knows I want to sleep with her.

I find that if I project that I'm by no means head over heels with her, and am a bit on the fence, but then give her occasional super-affectionate experiences, I've got the right formula to keep her interested and craving more of me.

Fair enough. I've tried it, they lose interest fast. I go hard and heavy at the beginning, they start to fall in love. Acting "aloof" has never worked for me.

 

[sazc]

One of the biggest issues on this board is the refusal of it's members to acknowledge the double standards that are grossly prevalent.

It's quite beta, how @Atom Smasher HAD to refer back to my gender, and accuse me of "reacting emotionally' to his post, just to prove himself "right" Lol, when you guys do that, I know you have run out of intelligent reasons to defend your stance.

When I comment, I am coming from a place of wanting you guys to find a quality female that will consistently be there for you. Not one you have to mind fvck in order to get to stick around. I am very confident that the female who allows herself to be played with in the manner suggested is a female that will create fabulous drama on the back end. Quality females don't sick around very long once the game playing starts in earnest.

And it is true. I've seen more than one post where a member has used this push pull "technique", lost the female, then boo hoo"s about it here, and the members talk about the female as if she was a gutter rat.

I'm not advocating smothering the female with attention, by any means. I'm saying why play games? Why push pull, or follow some script, in order to artificially create attachment. That seems so desperate, so beta.

How about having a REAL life? How about having real interests and hobbies that not only keep you interestING, but keep you busy?

Lol, you see the text come in, look at your watch and say " I'll answer that in six hours". That doesn't seem pathetic to you? To have to pretend you have a life because you are so needy for pvssy and/or female orbiters? Really?

Seriously, in all earnest, go be busy, get interesting, go get a life. Don't practice bvllchit scripts. Ridiculous...

 

[The Duke]

Any female who responds as described to the type of treatment detailed above is a female with serious issues, and is going to end up being a headache in the long run.

lol, aren't most women a headache in the long run? And this works on moms and sisters too! I will bet my life savings it will work on you too! lol, and there are a few other veterans here that would tell you the same thing.

Guys, this is why you are very careful about taking advice from a woman.

Let me try and help you understand Sazc.....I'm going to bet that you like some form of Hollywood drama as 99.9% of women do. It can be in the form of romantic comedies, Lifetime movies, soap operas, dramatic sitcoms, or even the Hollywood gossip news programs. Examples are Sechs in the City, Bachelor/Bachelorette, Kardashians, 50 Shades, TMZ, 2 broke girls, etc. Those shows are all designed to push emotional buttons and we all know females love emotional fluctuation. Its all irrational, emotionally based content based on he said, she said drama which is all crack you females crave.

Look at what you talk about with your female friends....its not about guns, cars, sports. Those are guy topics. You talk to your friends about so and so's new guy, your sister n law that you hate, your boss that looks like Ms Piggy and tries to undermine you and is fuhking the boss, why your boyfriend is such a dihk, and the girl down the street that gets all the guys attention and how she is such a slut! Its all he said she said emotional/irrational bs drama that incites tingles in you.

If I can make your emotions fluctuate with my push/pull crack, I can keep you hooked. Its when female emotions towards a guy become neither positive or negative that a guy gets in hot water and the female loses attraction. A guy hears things like I don't have feelings for you, you remind me of my father, you are boring we have drifted apart. Its all because he stopped generating tingles.

You can sit hear all day long and try and convince me otherwise and this only works on bad biatches. But we all know better. We have tried it on good and bad girls. You haven't so how the hell would you know?

I'm telling you God made female bodies look nice and feel good for a reason! It certainly wasn't because your gender is so easy to get along with and good for my health.

 

[lizardking82]

Well, sometimes you're not busy, @sazc . Even the busiest guys have downtime and women, no matter if it's a high quality or low quality (whatever that means) are hunting for the downtime of men. If the downtime lasts too long (it can even simply be too long in her mind), you're on the way to go down. What guys here suggest is keeping your girl on her toes. She is an emotional center with a pinch of logic so you "play" on her emotions, not to make her feel bad or to please yourself, but because it's what she NEEDS. And you need it, too. What a woman says she wants and what she responds to are two different things.

Listen, most guys would not want to have to do this. I was enjoying everything I had with my ex. We went to have dinner once a week at the same place, it had become kinda "our" place, a small pasta-specialized restaurant. I loved it. We had sex at the same hotel for about 2 years and the sex was amazing everytime for both of us. Apparently, there was not enough drama and new things in the relationship for her and this is one of the reasons she left. Do you think I like to be on my toes all the time? You think I don't like to relax knowing my woman is not up to some crazy thoughts and preparing **** tests because she might just feel doubtful about my masculinity. The nature of your gender requires these games to be played, NOT ALL THE TIME, BUT SOMETIMES.

 

[Atom Smasher]

What we are doing is avoiding running to her like an eager puppy dog at her every text. Most men do this.

We should be out there slaying dragons (paying attention to our businesses and projects, for those who may be a bit slow to comprehend), and not responding eagerly to every summons.

Women reveal their silliness and lack of understanding when they rail against "playing games". Men, we are about becoming influential, not playing games.

There are many reasons it is utter folly for a man to listen to a woman about relationships and male/female dynamics. They are utterly clueless about our experience, and utterly clueless about what they themselves respond to and are attracted to.

Look at Exhibit "A" here in this thread. An immediate resort to name-calling and subtle labeling when she is challenged.

Let them fold their arms and stomp their feet all they want, men. What women say and what they respond to are two different things.

For the guys who just don't get it, I'll repeat the gist of it: You should be too busy with building your kingdom to be responding eagerly to her texts. When you are too available, her interest will wane.

The guiding energy of the relationship must come from you in a proactive way, as opposed to your being in reactive mode to her energy. Over-attention on a woman is the death knell to the relationship. She doesn't want to be your primary focus in life. The man is the provider of the energy in a successful relationship. The woman is the responder. In today's world this natural role is often reversed. The woman must see and understand that you do not need her. She wants to be wanted, not needed.

 

[wifehunter]

The whole point is, not to make her the center of your world.

I am the earth, she is the moon.

Woman was made for Man.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

The whole point is, not to make her the center of your world.

I am the earth, she is the moon.

Woman was made for Man.

Yes, or become like this guy.

-------------

Stylite

A screaming wind
Across the waste
Wakes me from
My fitful sleep.

A Stylite am I,
With elements I vie,
My vigilance to keep
On a column high.

Nigh on two score years
With the desert beasts
That prowl beneath,
And odd souls for prayer,
And myself to mortify.

I rise with the window stars
That track the deep black
Which wraps this orb...
But for the punctured points
Through which light pours.

The wind dies down,
And down I lie.
With the moon I soon float,
And in the infinite drown.

 

[Reykhel]

Yes, or become like this guy.

-------------

Stylite

A screaming wind
Across the waste
Wakes me from
My fitful sleep.

A Stylite am I,
With elements I vie,
My vigilance to keep
On a column high.

Nigh on two score years
With the desert beasts
That prowl beneath,
And odd souls for prayer,
And myself to mortify.

I rise with the window stars
That track the deep black
Which wraps this orb...
But for the punctured points
Through which light pours.

The wind dies down,
And down I lie.
With the moon I soon float,
And in the infinite drown.

 

[sazc]

lol, aren't most women a headache in the long run? And this works on moms and sisters too! I will bet my life savings it will work on you too! lol, and there are a few other veterans here that would tell you the same thing.

Guys, this is why you are very careful about taking advice from a woman.

Let me try and help you understand Sazc.....I'm going to bet that you like some form of Hollywood drama as 99.9% of women do. It can be in the form of romantic comedies, Lifetime movies, soap operas, dramatic sitcoms, or even the Hollywood gossip news programs. Examples are Sechs in the City, Bachelor/Bachelorette, Kardashians, 50 Shades, TMZ, 2 broke girls, etc. Those shows are all designed to push emotional buttons and we all know females love emotional fluctuation. Its all irrational, emotionally based content based on he said, she said drama which is all crack you females crave.

Nope....nope, nope, nope, nope, nope

Look at what you talk about with your female friends....its not about guns, cars, sports. Those are guy topics. You talk to your friends about so and so's new guy, your sister n law that you hate, your boss that looks like Ms Piggy and tries to undermine you and is fuhking the boss, why your boyfriend is such a dihk, and the girl down the street that gets all the guys attention and how she is such a slut! Its all he said she said emotional/irrational bs drama that incites tingles in you.

Nope....nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong.
Ha ha, you missed the post where I mentioned I was getting a gun for my house, eh? I am CHL licensed my dear. D-oh! But SHES a CHICK!!!

If I can make your emotions fluctuate with my push/pull crack, I can keep you hooked. Its when female emotions towards a guy become neither positive or negative that a guy gets in hot water and the female loses attraction. A guy hears things like I don't have feelings for you, you remind me of my father, you are boring we have drifted apart. Its all because he stopped generating tingles.

READ THIS: The moment I realize any man is attempting to pull this kind of crap on me (and its really easy to spot) is the moment I realize HOW insecure he is, how beta he really is, I feel really sorry for his low self esteem, and I laugh that he thinks he can get over on me with this krap, and I feel powerful that he thinks I am such a prize that he has to try and pull me in with games..

You can sit hear all day long and try and convince me otherwise and this only works on bad biatches. But we all know better. We have tried it on good and bad girls. You haven't so how the hell would you know?

It didnt work on that last chick you were dating and SO into, the one you PMed me about, remember?

To sum this all up - just like the dude that has to use this ind of 'game' on females to manufacture and articial attraction is really displaying insecurty and lack of self esteem (the ability to pull via who he really is, as opposed to running this krap) the female that falls for it is more likely to be a nutcase on the back end.

I had a great, solid, stable childhood with a father, mother, siblings, an advanced education, and now I am having a fabulous adulthood. That's why, when the members here try to write me off as "oh. she's a female, she fits the mold we talk about" I laugh my arse off. That's just an incredibly weak way to attempt to dismiss what i have to say which, by the way, is based in a solid understanding of healthy relationships. Oh yea, never was a branch swinger, never rode the c0ck carousel (stranger d1ck, gross) and never needed to cheat on anyone, I just let them know I needed to move on.

All of your labels and ASSumptions are invalid.

What's ironic about that is, after I posted all of that in a different thread, one of the members (who shall remain nameless) captured it and commented on how utterly boring I sounded. Me....lacking ALL the qualities that cause you to call females gutter rats, get called 'boring'. Really? Which way are you guys going to play this?

I'll tell you, it doesnt matter which way you guys are going to play it because, whatever is going on, it's always going to be the females fault. There's no real solution or truth to be found here, just a bunch of lost people trying to not take blame.


All i have to say is, if you run this push pull on females, the ones who wont put up with it are probably the ones with healthy self esteem. The ones who fall for it ,hook line and sinker, are the ones who probably have mental issues - beware

 

[sazc]

What I find utterly fascinating about this whole chat is that this, in NO way, illustrates another one of the concepts here - the idea that a man is supposed to LEAD in a relationship.

I was reading a thread about a month ago and came to understand that, what that really means - the idea the man is to LEAD in a relationship IS that the male is supposed to set the tempo for the relationship and that INCLUDED the effectiveness/style of communication that is to take place. In other words, the man is supposed to set the manner in which the partners communicate with each other.

So you 'lead' into a relationship with push/pull, deliberate emotional fluctuation, arranged avoidance.... this sets the tempo for the communication style of the partnership. You deliberately dont respond for 6 hours - that creates the idea that it's perfectly okay for her to do the same. You LEAD and deliberately make yourself scarce - greenlight for her to do the same.

The problem comes when you lie about it all (as is suggested here) You lead into the relationship with a lie, and then....she's taking a long time to respond, being scarce, running hot and cold.... Is that her reciprocating the communication style that you, as a man, led with? Because YOU modeled it. Is that her playung the game back atcha? Or is that her, not really interested?

You'll never know because you, as the man, this is what you lead with, you created the model of communication for this relationship.

I expect a bunch of push back for this post, whatevs. You guys seem to lack, or simply want to ignore, deep understanding of people in some areas, psychologically speaking. There's always a lot of surface talk here. Superficial.