She thinks I'd be a needy hungover person. Is she teasing or is she basing it off how I am with her?

Rambo92

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Been on a couple of dates and I had sent a text that made this girl smile..

She said "Glad you had a good night and totally appreciated waking up to this text this morning :) smile on my face for today! Thank you xxx".

So I replied a day later saying morning, that I thought I sent a text back but was hungover and I said you're welcome (probably wasn't best thing to say).

She said "Morning :) haha hungover [my name], I'd love to see that. Aww thanks :p Yeah I think you'd be a needy hungover person; wanting cuddles and a bed day!"

I guess I'm worried because the word "needy" came up. Why would she think I'd be a "needy hangover person" as I don't feel like I come across needy. I match my texting length to hers, or lessen it, I send one text for one back. I ask her out and straight to the point and if she's busy I'm accepting of it (we do have a date arranged for wednesday btw).

So is this just her teasing, or could it have reference to how she sees me?
 

lizardking82

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Dude, relax. She is offering you that feminine vibe we all want from a female. Enjoy it.
 

Rambo92

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Dude, relax. She is offering you that feminine vibe we all want from a female. Enjoy it.
Thanks man.

But how would you interpret this last interaction?

Me - "If you're hinting for cuddles with me.. I don't come so easy! Haha you and the word sensible.. never
Sounds great. I'll be returning to superhero duties soon x"

(after an hour) Girl - "You don't come so easy.. Right i'll remember that
I know i'm going to try and be sensible, set myself a goal haha x"

(after an hour) Me - Haha, I'm going to have to focus on work. I'll see you at 7 outside [place] on Wednesday, we'll go to this little place I came across. Enjoy your night out x

I didn't get a response and that was 1pm, now it's 1am. Anything to worry about?

(Just to note, we had this coming Wednesday at 7pm agreed earlier in the week)
 
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lizardking82

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Thanks man.

But how would you interpret this last interaction?

Me - "If you're hinting for cuddles with me.. I don't come so easy! Haha you and the word sensible.. never
Sounds great. I'll be returning to superhero duties soon x"

(after an hour) Girl - "You don't come so easy.. Right i'll remember that
I know i'm going to try and be sensible, set myself a goal haha x"

(after an hour) Me - Haha, I'm going to have to focus on work. I'll see you at 7 outside [place] on Wednesday, we'll go to this little place I came across. Enjoy your night out x

I didn't get a response and that was 1pm, now it's 1am. Anything to worry about?

(Just to note, we had this coming Wednesday at 7pm agreed earlier in the week)
You go on about your things and just let her make contact. If she does, take it from there, it's quite contextual in this case. If she doesn't, you follow through with the date and show up at 7 pm two days later. I think you got a good situation going on here. Do not panic cause she didn't answer back yet. Keep us updated for any other situation you might find worrysome.
 

Rambo92

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You go on about your things and just let her make contact. If she does, take it from there, it's quite contextual in this case. If she doesn't, you follow through with the date and show up at 7 pm two days later. I think you got a good situation going on here. Do not panic cause she didn't answer back yet. Keep us updated for any other situation you might find worrysome.
I'm expecting to hear from her today (Monday) if she sends me a birthday message over text or facebook, if not then it's not looking too great imo.

I do plan to back off until Wednesday, the day of the date, but wondering if it's worth dropping a text saying "see you later/looking forward to seeing you later" or something. Not too sure. I mean the wisest move would be to turn up there at 7pm and text her "I'm here now" and if she claims to have forgotton or doesn't turn up then I'll ditch her.

Cheers dude, I'll keep you updated if anything develops.
 

sazc

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when in doubt, dont over think, just chill
 

lizardking82

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Oh, it;s your birthday, I see. If she knows it's your birthday and she's talkin' to you this sweetly, a wish is a normal thing to expect. However, if you don't get the wish, do not lose hope, soldier :p it's cool, no wish, you still don't write to her and just show up on Wednesday. My gut tells me she will send sth from now till Wednesday, though. Let's see.
 

Rambo92

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Oh, it;s your birthday, I see. If she knows it's your birthday and she's talkin' to you this sweetly, a wish is a normal thing to expect. However, if you don't get the wish, do not lose hope, soldier :p it's cool, no wish, you still don't write to her and just show up on Wednesday. My gut tells me she will send sth from now till Wednesday, though. Let's see.
Yeah, it'd be a whole three days of no contact which would be the longest we've gone (longest previously being 2 before she contacted me).
I still feel like I should say "see you later" in the morning though but I'll give myself time to think on that.

We'll see anyway, I'll come back to this thread and update it some point.
 

lizardking82

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Yeah, it'd be a whole three days of no contact which would be the longest we've gone (longest previously being 2 before she contacted me).
I still feel like I should say "see you later" in the morning though but I'll give myself time to think on that.

We'll see anyway, I'll come back to this thread and update it some point.
No, don't do that. No need for that, no point in doing that. It just shows her how eager you are for the date and I would not advise that. Your attitude should be somewhere in between "I don't mind" and "I would enjoy a date with you".
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

OP, you need to stop bantering. It makes you look hooked on this girl.

If she thinks you are hooked she realizes or assumes you have NO other options, in which case you will indeed come across as needy.

No Bueno.

So leave it completely alone until Wednesday. As in NO CONTACT unless she reaches out...(and if she reaches out just say...hey on the way to work/work out/hang with a friend) and gracefully exit the conversation.

She needs enough space to wonder just a little bit what you are doing when you aren't with her. If you don't allow that space you'll kill the attraction before it gets started.

This is the single worst thing I see men do when they are interested in a woman. Nothing kills attraction more than acting like a good dog excited to see you after a long day away.

She has gone silent because you are killing any mystery. Be patient and wait till Wednesday. If you keep doing as you are doing she will KNOW you are already naming the children & it will scare her right off.

If you hear nothing at all from her by 5pm on Wednesday, shoot her a quick text that says "How's your day shaping up?" Notice this gives her the opportunity to flake...

If she flakes you then say "Ok cool. I've got an event that has come up...another time"

If she doesn't flake then you arrange time/place & expect her to flake anyway. If she shows up, you can salvage it, if she doesn't show then you blow off texting her and hit her up casually 2 weeks later IF you please. Otherwise just move on.

Now if she contacts you before 5pm Webnesday your odds of salvaging this are higher. Just cut the cutesy responses. It says the wrong things.
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Rambo92

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I would say all of these things are the behavior traits of a high value man living in abundance. But my advice would be become successful, work out, spin plates, get a damn social life, and none of these needy problems will ever arise.
Advice from the old lady:

OP, you need to stop bantering. It makes you look hooked on this girl.

If she thinks you are hooked she realizes or assumes you have NO other options, in which case you will indeed come across as needy.

No Bueno.

So leave it completely alone until Wednesday. As in NO CONTACT unless she reaches out...(and if she reaches out just say...hey on the way to work/work out/hang with a friend) and gracefully exit the conversation.

She needs enough space to wonder just a little bit what you are doing when you aren't with her. If you don't allow that space you'll kill the attraction before it gets started.

This is the single worst thing I see men do when they are interested in a woman. Nothing kills attraction more than acting like a good dog excited to see you after a long day away.

She has gone silent because you are killing any mystery. Be patient and wait till Wednesday. If you keep doing as you are doing she will KNOW you are already naming the children & it will scare her right off.

If you hear nothing at all from her by 5pm on Wednesday, shoot her a quick text that says "How's your day shaping up?" Notice this gives her the opportunity to flake...

If she flakes you then say "Ok cool. I've got an event that has come up...another time"

If she doesn't flake then you arrange time/place & expect her to flake anyway. If she shows up, you can salvage it, if she doesn't show then you blow off texting her and hit her up casually 2 weeks later IF you please. Otherwise just move on.

Now if she contacts you before 5pm Webnesday your odds of salvaging this are higher. Just cut the cutesy responses. It says the wrong things.
I do have an active social life and I work a lot, so if she contacts me then I can take an hour to respond. The messages will go on about 3-5 texts each between us then i'll end it. I think I only banter because I want to keep it upbeat and flirty. When she asked to re-arrange the date last week, I acted aloof and said "Okay, maybe another time" and she said "that seemed like an off text" and then said "your last text seemed like a weird text from you" because I acted different from what I usually did, then she continued and said she was free this Wednesday.

On Thursday night, she sent me a drunk text inviting me to her friends party on the 20th so I replied Friday morning, but the following morning she said "Omg totally just read this :') I was so drunk last night.. not good! Omg, I'll talk to you about it on Wednesday. Don't book it off just yet hahahaa :') xxx"

So yeah on Saturday at 2am, I sent a sweet drunk text (she'd done this 3 times to me before but she wanted one). Then she replied and I didn't.

Sunday morning I initiated and we sent a few back and forth.

I haven't initiated too much, but I have been doing so more than she has these last few days.

I guess going from a week of contacting each other every day in a row (whether she reached out to me, or I did, or the texting carried into the next day), I guess it will help get that mystery back by disappearing for 2-3 days.

I'll text her saying I'm on my way when I next do, if she doesn't get in touch.
 

Rambo92

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So her joking saying "I think you'd be a needy hungover person; wanting cuddles and a bed day!" doesn't mean she thinks that I am needy, right? She just assumes that anyone with a hangover would be needy? Just didn't want her thinking that was my personality.
 

BeExcellent

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Blow it off. Lord knows what she is/was thinking. Trust me she'd be mortified if she saw how you are obsessing over this comment.

Simmer down; simmer down. Trying to analyze woman think is pointless and besides it doesn't matter anyway.

Just see her Wednesday and carry on as per your usual cool self.
 

Rambo92

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Blow it off. Lord knows what she is/was thinking. Trust me she'd be mortified if she saw how you are obsessing over this comment.

Simmer down; simmer down. Trying to analyze woman think is pointless and besides it doesn't matter anyway.

Just see her Wednesday and carry on as per your usual cool self.
Ok thanks. Yeah I overlooked/ignored it just like I did when she said last week "that was a weird text from you.. i'm free next wednesday?" I just said "Okay great, see you at 7pm".

Time to back off until I get to the location on Wednesday, unless she contacts me first. Don't hold hope for the date if she forgets to wish me happy birthday though.
 

Rambo92

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Oh snap she just text me this morning

"Morning :) so what did you get up to last night? Can I ask a serious question; because I'm new to all this dating stuff. Are you seeing other girls apart from me? X"

I am talking to another girl but I'm only physically seeing this one right now as this other girl is going on holiday for a week.

I was going to say I'm only seeing her at the moment but also keeping my options open too. Should I mention the options bit? I mean she's the girl I'd rather focus on.
 

lizardking82

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No, man. Damn, you are so in need of help :p Listen, tell her "nah, I got a lot of other things to do I am barely finding time for you!"
 

Rambo92

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I went with saying something like "You're the only girl I'm seeing at this moment" but now she's replying quickly compared to earlier in the week. I said "at this moment" because that could hint to it changing if work frees up or she does something to cause me to look elsewhere. She must have seen me on POF because she went online on it when I was.

I think she saw this really good looking girl like my "had a fun evening" facebook status last night and she got jealous as she asked me what I got up to last night. Pays to keep some girls around on Facebook lol.
 
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