Thanks for reading me!
I met this girl almost 2 years ago thanks to my mom at her church (she has been visiting the Jehovah's Witness church in the last few years), and they had become very close friends.
I came to US 3 years ago with my mother. The first year I lived alone, but now I've been living with my mom for the last 2 years in a very small apartment. My mom is overprotective and wants to influence my life (sometimes lying, and/or victimizing herself, ect). I love her and there’re a lot of very good thing about her, but she made me an AFC (I don't blame her tho, that's the way she was raised and I grew up without my dad). I’m agnostic, but once in a while I accompany her to the church. At first I didn’t see any ‘’SOI” on this girl. Few months later my mom started telling me that this girl likes me: “she’s always asking for you”, “She tells me to encourage you to come to the meetings/church”, “she gets nervous when she see you” “She is very kind and lovely with me because she likes you” “etc”. I thought my mom was trying to manipulate me to get to go to the meetings (at church) more often. I was right but she was too. After a while I started to see some “SOI” on her: Kino, nervousness, qualifying herself, introducing me to her family, fellows and friends, constantly offering help, etc. Before reading “The book of Pook” I had have no idea about “********”, so I didn’t how to interpret those “SOI” because most of my interactions with her (somehow) my mom was involved in it. I was confuse.
In the meantime I met another girl, she was average looking girl. I think a lot of girls see me as an attractive guy, and this girl was one of them. At the first opportunity I swept her off (I was very alpha at that point) but a week later she dumped me “I’m too busy right now with my job and school to continue this relationship”, why? Because after I made her my girlfriend, I became a beta, an AFC. I thought that “I’m good looking guy, therefore I don’t have to worry about being Alpha all the time”. I was wrong! I learned that looks doesn't matter and “I must prove my worth every day in life”. I decided to improve my life and started reading The Book of Pook, it changed my mindset and gave me useful tools.
Back to the religious girl.
This girl (she is in her late 20's, and I’m in my earliest 20’s) was raised as a "Jehovah's witness", her family and friends are all JW. This religion (JW) teaches that almost everything outside the church is wrong. The slut shaming fear in her life must be higher than an average girl. With my recently experience and a new mindset I figured out that she is giving me “SOI” but trying to keep cool with the fellowship, using my mom as an excuse.
This week she gave a big “SOI”, there was an important meeting at her church, she wanted me to come, she told my mom that she would like help me to buy some clothes for this important meeting. I texted her, and for first time my mom wasn’t in there. She was different, she was flirting and I was an Alpha at point. She pick me up later that day and we went out for shopping (She cancelled a meeting with some of her fellows to go out with me). That was first time alone with her. I was nervous, she was nervous, but we broke the ice very quickly, she started to talk to me about god, religion, “that there is no point in having goals because this is a limited life and instead we should worship god”, etc (Religious BS), I think my first mistake came with it: I didn’t have the balls to say “I don’t really believe that, I have goals”, I should have said something like that. That happened in the first minutes when we were in her car on the way to the mall. I changed the topic and we started talk about her, I wanted to know who is she, everything went smooth from there. While we were shopping we had good kino, a lot of humor, a lot of “SOI”, she mentioned to me like 4 time that She has never bought men's clothes before (Translation: She hasn’t been married, or in a relationship, and she is available). It was very exciting experience, I enjoyed and she did too. Everything good overall. I did wrong a few times: I qualified myself by mentioning things about me that she wasn’t asking or even paying attention to it. The next day at the “important meeting” she was acting like if she doesn't likes me, almost ignoring me, I guess is because the slut shaming.
All this experience brings up a lot questions to my mind, I would really appreciate your help:
Should I go for her?
If I want something serious with her I have come to the church more often: I don’t have to become a member, or share her church views, I just need to be a friendly and known face. But if I become more available, isn’t she going to lose interest? And if I want sex, I have to marry her! Should I go for kiss next time? Should I sweep her up?
Why is she attracted to me?
At her church there are just a few young men, she is getting old and her younger sister already has a baby. Is she looking a provider, someone who can give her a wedding, a child, and protection (leaving in a small apartment with his mom)? Is because she thinks I’m handsome?
How can I improve myself?
I’m afraid to fall in love, because if I do it I would become an AFC, and she won’t love me anymore, so how can I fall in love and keep being an Alpha? How can I be more Alpha? How can I improve my self-esteem?
Any book or articles suggestions are welcome.
I want be very clear. I like this girl a lot, but I know she is not the one, because the one doesn’t exist. I want to know what’s going with this because there are a lot girls out there and I want to be ready.
If you need more info, please let me know.
Thank you!
I met this girl almost 2 years ago thanks to my mom at her church (she has been visiting the Jehovah's Witness church in the last few years), and they had become very close friends.
I came to US 3 years ago with my mother. The first year I lived alone, but now I've been living with my mom for the last 2 years in a very small apartment. My mom is overprotective and wants to influence my life (sometimes lying, and/or victimizing herself, ect). I love her and there’re a lot of very good thing about her, but she made me an AFC (I don't blame her tho, that's the way she was raised and I grew up without my dad). I’m agnostic, but once in a while I accompany her to the church. At first I didn’t see any ‘’SOI” on this girl. Few months later my mom started telling me that this girl likes me: “she’s always asking for you”, “She tells me to encourage you to come to the meetings/church”, “she gets nervous when she see you” “She is very kind and lovely with me because she likes you” “etc”. I thought my mom was trying to manipulate me to get to go to the meetings (at church) more often. I was right but she was too. After a while I started to see some “SOI” on her: Kino, nervousness, qualifying herself, introducing me to her family, fellows and friends, constantly offering help, etc. Before reading “The book of Pook” I had have no idea about “********”, so I didn’t how to interpret those “SOI” because most of my interactions with her (somehow) my mom was involved in it. I was confuse.
In the meantime I met another girl, she was average looking girl. I think a lot of girls see me as an attractive guy, and this girl was one of them. At the first opportunity I swept her off (I was very alpha at that point) but a week later she dumped me “I’m too busy right now with my job and school to continue this relationship”, why? Because after I made her my girlfriend, I became a beta, an AFC. I thought that “I’m good looking guy, therefore I don’t have to worry about being Alpha all the time”. I was wrong! I learned that looks doesn't matter and “I must prove my worth every day in life”. I decided to improve my life and started reading The Book of Pook, it changed my mindset and gave me useful tools.
Back to the religious girl.
This girl (she is in her late 20's, and I’m in my earliest 20’s) was raised as a "Jehovah's witness", her family and friends are all JW. This religion (JW) teaches that almost everything outside the church is wrong. The slut shaming fear in her life must be higher than an average girl. With my recently experience and a new mindset I figured out that she is giving me “SOI” but trying to keep cool with the fellowship, using my mom as an excuse.
This week she gave a big “SOI”, there was an important meeting at her church, she wanted me to come, she told my mom that she would like help me to buy some clothes for this important meeting. I texted her, and for first time my mom wasn’t in there. She was different, she was flirting and I was an Alpha at point. She pick me up later that day and we went out for shopping (She cancelled a meeting with some of her fellows to go out with me). That was first time alone with her. I was nervous, she was nervous, but we broke the ice very quickly, she started to talk to me about god, religion, “that there is no point in having goals because this is a limited life and instead we should worship god”, etc (Religious BS), I think my first mistake came with it: I didn’t have the balls to say “I don’t really believe that, I have goals”, I should have said something like that. That happened in the first minutes when we were in her car on the way to the mall. I changed the topic and we started talk about her, I wanted to know who is she, everything went smooth from there. While we were shopping we had good kino, a lot of humor, a lot of “SOI”, she mentioned to me like 4 time that She has never bought men's clothes before (Translation: She hasn’t been married, or in a relationship, and she is available). It was very exciting experience, I enjoyed and she did too. Everything good overall. I did wrong a few times: I qualified myself by mentioning things about me that she wasn’t asking or even paying attention to it. The next day at the “important meeting” she was acting like if she doesn't likes me, almost ignoring me, I guess is because the slut shaming.
All this experience brings up a lot questions to my mind, I would really appreciate your help:
Should I go for her?
If I want something serious with her I have come to the church more often: I don’t have to become a member, or share her church views, I just need to be a friendly and known face. But if I become more available, isn’t she going to lose interest? And if I want sex, I have to marry her! Should I go for kiss next time? Should I sweep her up?
Why is she attracted to me?
At her church there are just a few young men, she is getting old and her younger sister already has a baby. Is she looking a provider, someone who can give her a wedding, a child, and protection (leaving in a small apartment with his mom)? Is because she thinks I’m handsome?
How can I improve myself?
I’m afraid to fall in love, because if I do it I would become an AFC, and she won’t love me anymore, so how can I fall in love and keep being an Alpha? How can I be more Alpha? How can I improve my self-esteem?
Any book or articles suggestions are welcome.
I want be very clear. I like this girl a lot, but I know she is not the one, because the one doesn’t exist. I want to know what’s going with this because there are a lot girls out there and I want to be ready.
If you need more info, please let me know.
Thank you!
