Should I break up with her??

[DeltsBrah]

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 months now. We went slow so it's good she didn't have sex with me for almost 2 months after we started seeing each other.

The problems I have are that she has a lot of guy friends who all happen to be single from what I know. I don't know if it's because she's insecure or what. When asked what her biggest fear in a relationship is its because she feels like she's not good enough so my thinking is she has a lot of male attention to help boost her confidence and validate herself not to have sex with them.

Also I still haven't met her family apart from her little sister who's 12 years old we went out to dinner on her birthday. I can see why I haven't met them yet she got a divorce last year she was married for 3 years she said he cheated on her and I don't know for certain I just have to go based off of her word. She did meet my family during Christmas and my parents liked her a lot.

She also has an iud birth control implant but she said it's because she was married and even with that she won't have unprotected sex with me so I respect her for that.

How do I tell her this bothers me without being whiny or insecure? Or should I just end it?

 

[RangerMIke]

Sorry... what are you bothered by? You are having sex with a girl you like, she has guy friends... is this it? Go date other girls, I don't see the problem.

 

[DeltsBrah]

Sorry... what are you bothered by? You are having sex with a girl you like, she has guy friends... is this it? Go date other girls, I don't see the problem.

I'm not in it just for the sex that's the thing. I should of added more information. She lives about an hour and a half away so we only hang out like twice a week. Meanwhile she sees her other guy friends.

 

[9Volt]

If you've only been dating for three months, she has other guy friends you've never been introduced to as her boyfriend, you live an hour and a half away, and only see her twice a week and this bothers you then break up with her.

Make a list of good and bad qualities about her and your situation. If there are more bad than good then just end it.

I personally wouldn't date a chick an hour and a half away to begin with. Especially if there's many other options for you that are closer.

 

[dustmuffin]

Long distance? Guy friends? RUN.....find a local girl to f uck. Just do it.

 

[RangerMIke]

I'm not in it just for the sex that's the thing. I should of added more information. She lives about an hour and a half away so we only hang out like twice a week. Meanwhile she sees her other guy friends.

You can't get serious with a chick that is that far away... my advice is to keep fvcking her, and go after other women. Take my advice with a grain of salt because I am NOT a relationship guy. I don't recommend exclusive relationships at all. But I will say long distance relationships NEVER work. It is impossible for women to do this. If you are not fvcking her on a regular basis you're toast.

 

[Urbanyst]

You sound desperate.

Like you just want to be in a relationship.. even if its extremely inconvenient and you don't even like the girl's personality all that much. Get out more bro. There are so many girls out there. Local ones.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

She won't have unprotected sex even with a birth control implant? Dafuq? THE WHOLE FRIGGIN POINT OF THAT **** IS SO THAT YOU CAN GO IN RAW AND FINISH RAW. That's not someone I would particularly respect, I mean sh!t bro she's so insecure that she still needs protection even though she knows she cant get pregnant.

That's garbage. 2 months waiting. Guy friends. Long distance. Failed marriage (he cheated on her? It's a mystery why, I mean it's not like she couldn't have made him wait too. Oh wait....). Birth control implant but still wants you to wear a condom. Tell me my dude, what do you gain from this besides sex once or twice a week at most? Do what you gotta do man, but you gotta have standards too.

 

[DeltsBrah]

She won't have unprotected sex even with a birth control implant? Dafuq? THE WHOLE FRIGGIN POINT OF THAT **** IS SO THAT YOU CAN GO IN RAW AND FINISH RAW. That's not someone I would particularly respect, I mean sh!t bro she's so insecure that she still needs protection even though she knows she cant get pregnant.

That's garbage. 2 months waiting. Guy friends. Long distance. Failed marriage (he cheated on her? It's a mystery why, I mean it's not like she couldn't have made him wait too. Oh wait....). Birth control implant but still wants you to wear a condom. Tell me my dude, what do you gain from this besides sex once or twice a week at most? Do what you gotta do man, but you gotta have standards too.

True I might end it but she said another month till we to raw lol. She brought up the idea of anal too but that won't be for a while (she said 6ish months) probably won't even be with her much longer.

 

[KingofPuss]

Lol giving you a time frame for sexual things. Dump her

 

[Juanto]

She brought up the idea of anal too but that won't be for a while (she said 6ish months)

Couldnt help but to burst out laughing after reading this "timeline" given by her.

 

[Desdinova]

she has a lot of guy friends

she got a divorce

She lives about an hour and a half away

These are pretty much all deal breakers for me, at least when it comes to a committed LTR. She's cvm-dumpster material, nothing more. Long distance, guy friends, and divorced? What a fvcking mess.

 

[Juanto]

Long distance, guy friends, and divorced?

Why do you reckon divorced women are broken?

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

True I might end it but she said another month till we to raw lol. She brought up the idea of anal too but that won't be for a while (she said 6ish months) probably won't even be with her much longer.

Oh man, I mean like the others have pointed out, she is giving you a timeline bro. I would think that sex is supposed to develop and progress naturally, not hold a rigid schedule or anything like that. Why do you have to wait 6 months till she wants to do anal? That means she has definitely done it before, and LIKED it too because she suggested it, but yet at the same time she is making you wait. What about the guy who she first had anal with? Did he have to wait? Most likely not because most of the time it's men who push to do kinkier things that women never realized that they liked. I dunno man, I mean I guess you still gain SOME sort of benefot from this, but I think you should know that of she liked you, and I mean REALLY liked you, she probably would do everything she could for you to make you happy. But she isn't doing that so she probably doesn't like you any crazy amount like she probably did with that other guy. You don't need to end it per se, but I think you should actively seek other women to have some fun with because with all of her guy friends, it sounds like she is doing the same. It's a friends woth benefits/fvckbuddy type of thing here between you too, not a boyfriend-girlfriend type thing.

 

[Roober]

A couple things...

-When a woman makes you wait for secks or other things, it is almost never worth it (like 99%)
-She has not one, but several male orbiters... never a good sign
-Long distance relationships are a woman's frame. Who does all the driving?
-but... she is 1.5 hours away, so you can play at home when not with her. Go spin some plates!

Not sure why you guys make a big deal about going raw. A woman that doesn't want to strikes me as responsible...

 

[The Duke]

DeltsBrah- I don't think this chic is really into you like she should be. She is putting too many road blocks in front of you. A girl that is truly into you will fear losing you and offer up things she really doesn't want to do. I suspect this "good girl" vibe she is trying to throw at you is a smoke screen. She is already using sechs as a tool to control/manipulate.

How many times has she traveled to see you? How many times have you traveled to see her? If there is big disparity, I would question her commitment. How many times relative to you does she initiate texts/calls?

I would step back, think with your head not your heart and take a hard look at things. Long distance is tough but it takes two people who are willing to put the work in and have excellent communication skills. I did it for 8yrs.

 

[DeltsBrah]

DeltsBrah- I don't think this chic is really into you like she should be. She is putting too many road blocks in front of you. A girl that is truly into you will fear losing you and offer up things she really doesn't want to do. I suspect this "good girl" vibe she is trying to throw at you is a smoke screen. She is already using sechs as a tool to control/manipulate.

How many times has she traveled to see you? How many times have you traveled to see her? If there is big disparity, I would question her commitment. How many times relative to you does she initiate texts/calls?

I would step back, think with your head not your heart and take a hard look at things. Long distance is tough but it takes two people who are willing to put the work in and have excellent communication skills. I did it for 8yrs.

I failed to mention it's been a year since her divorce so would the roadblocks be a defense mechanism for her? I mean she doesn't want to get hurt again. She's traveled about the same to see me as I have her sometimes if we don't have a lot of time we meet about half way and get dinner, etc. I was usually initiating conversations via text but I set it straight and now she's been more communiactive about it.

She does talk a lot about sex and even doing it with me in public places like car, dressing room, etc. I'm not sure if being adventurous is good or bad but I've never been with a girl who suggested things like that.

 

[The Duke]

From my experience, 1year post divorce is a time period when men and women both get a little wild with their dating. They aren't looking for something super committed. But that doesn't mean there aren't exceptions. There is still a lot of pain inside a person that is 1year out of a divorce.

Does she have some sort of attachment issue perhaps? There is secure, avoidant, dismissive, and anxious types of attachment. We all have these issues and one can change types through out life. Here's a link that explains some of those:
https://www.whatiscodependency.com/change-your-attachment-style/

Do you want more out of the relationship than she does? Who cares the most about it? Who has lead the relationship emotionally? Who is most open with their feelings?

 

[DeltsBrah]

Kinda feel like she has problems committing and she blames it on her ex cheating. I feel like I care more about 60:40 ratio. Hard to say who's more open but I'd say I slightly am.

 

[The Duke]

Go read about avoidant or dismissive attachment. Those types have commitment issues related to their pasts.