2 dates went great. Suddenly went sorta cold?

[marmel75]

Met girl took her on date she obviously found me attractive talked for hours end up date got a couple pecks on the lip. She texted me. After that non stop we talked for days from morning to night just making jokes laughing etc. On christmas she ready has told her family about me. Her mom told her to invite me over etc etc. Went on 2nd date ice skating i was horrible but it still went well she was laughing her ass off the entire time. Went and got food laughed etc etc. Went to drop her off at apartment and she said if I wasn't so tired i would invite you in. Gave her a hug got a couple more pecks on the lips more like bf/gf kisses then making out. After that texts got more spaced out. She still snapchats me alot with her and her sister together and random stuff like that. Basically quit talking to me on text and now we just snapchat but the communication isnt nonstop like it was a few days ago. What could this be? We still communicate but shes kinda got a hard vibe now to read.. But i have no idea what to do at this point
Help me out fellas

You didn't fvck her so it's not surprising. Until that happens you are never guaranteed to see her again. It's a coin flip. It means other guys are in the picture that are in the same position as you...once you fvck her, you rise above most of those guys and into a different more selective category.

Which is why having sex with her ASAP should be your goal. It puts you in control because she looks at you differently...especially if you've banged her right...

 

[Ryan Adams]

Exactly i feel as if the go to her place for food and drinks is best way to have sex.

So now should i just not initiate conversation until the day of meet?

 

[bigneil]

Typically the female ends up at an emotional crossroads where they realize that they ate going have to get vulnerable, sexually and emotionally, with the man, if they continue to date. The idea of opening up sexually and emotionally, and leaving themselves vulnerable to getting hurt, causes them to panic and pull back. I would imagine that it's very confusing and frustrating for a man.

This is precisely what I just went through. This is the ultimate test. This is when they actually love you but are trying (hard) to push you away (paradoxically in direct proportion to how strong their feelings are). Women push you away to test the strength of the relationship. Men should try this themselves but rarely do. Ironically, men doing this to women who do this, at the precise moment, can be the catalyst for producing optimal love. Most romance stories are based on this premise in some form.

 

[CMNILS87]

Sounds like too much investment from you. Women want a guy that's available, but not too available. I had a girl today say "I know you're looking at my snapchats, but you not responding is turning me on so much, so mysterious"

If you're always in contact, it looks like you're waiting by your phone for her to text back. You need to be busy with stuff and wait to respond. Just the way things are, it's a game

 

[Ryan Adams]

Yeah like I said i can tell she likes me obviously but right now is where its crucial for me not to be to to invested i feel. Last night i set up a date to where i would come over and make some food and watch a movie to which she agreed easily to. And after i no responded a couple of times she came runnin back. I haven't said the day yet of the date yet though. We haven't communicated today yet. How long just should i go without saying ANYTHING to her??

 

[finality]

Exactly i feel as if the go to her place for food and drinks is best way to have sex.

So now should i just not initiate conversation until the day of meet?

Yes, and wait a couple hours to respond and change your response time. And stay off snap chat. Make up bs about how the app is glitching or something.

If you initiate stay away from hows your day BS. Make up a story about something funny you seen while doing something and then ghost her until she double texts.

 

[Ryan Adams]

Thing is im asking should i initiate today? or just have no contact for a day? We ended on a good note last night when we talked. Also just question why stay off snapchat vs normal text?

 

[finality]

Yeah like I said i can tell she likes me obviously but right now is where its crucial for me not to be to to invested i feel. Last night i set up a date to where i would come over and make some food and watch a movie to which she agreed easily to. And after i no responded a couple of times she came runnin back. I haven't said the day yet of the date yet though. We haven't communicated today yet. How long just should i go without saying ANYTHING to her??

You should've set up a specific date. Now you have to essentially ask her out twice for one encounter.

She knows you like her as you've already asked her out.. don't initiate until she does.

 

[finality]

Thing is im asking should i initiate today? or just have no contact for a day? We ended on a good note last night when we talked. Also just question why stay off snapchat vs normal text?

The chances of you increasing her attraction via snap chat is like 1% vs you could say something stupid, make yourself too available pretty easily.

 

[bigneil]

In this situation, you simply wait until she contacts you which will take 1-2 weeks, but her interest will increase.

It's only been 2 dates so you can't expect her to be falling. It takes at least 2 months.

 

[sazc]

This is precisely what I just went through. This is the ultimate test. This is when they actually love you but are trying (hard) to push you away (paradoxically in direct proportion to how strong their feelings are). Women push you away to test the strength of the relationship. Men should try this themselves but rarely do. Ironically, men doing this to women who do this, at the precise moment, can be the catalyst for producing optimal love. Most romance stories are based on this premise in some form.

You give women too much credit, you have to be very introspective to understand this reaction within yourself. I don't even think this is a test, I don't think most women realize that they are getting scared .

Sometimes the guy sitting in front if then is looking for exactly the same thing they are looking for, and that scares the crap out of them, so they make up something about how the guy just isn't right, and go silent.

 

[Ryan Adams]

Yeah i shoulda set a specific date but whatever too late now. Im gonna go no contact until i get a response. Not gonna lie i want to keep in contact why is it hard? Haha

 

[bigneil]

Yeah i shoulda set a specific date but whatever too late now. Im gonna go no contact until i get a response. Not gonna lie i want to keep in contact why is it hard? Haha

It's worth it when they write. Don't worry and hold out. Note my date saw I had improved after only 12 days with a physical trainer (6 one hour sessions, every other day). Get to improving in the meantime, and date other women.

She will only miss you more. 3-4 weeks is peak time to miss someone, and thus best time for makeup sex.

 

[Ryan Adams]

She hit me up on snapchat and i answered. She keeps showing me sweet little cute activities she does with her nephew and niece i feel like a **** for not responding to it.

 

[Igetit!]

She hit me up on snapchat and i answered. She keeps showing me sweet little cute activities she does with her nephew and niece i feel like a **** for not responding to it.

Dude....you don't have to 100% ignore her. You're going from extreme to extreme.

All we said was not to talk to her all day every day...from morning to night like you used to do. It's ok to talk A LITTLE.

Just chat a bit,toss in a few flirts here and there,talk a bit more,then tell her you have to go. End the conversation....that's that.

Just talk a bit here and there....don't do those daily,morning to night,all day texting back and forth marathons.

 

[bigneil]

Looking back at my stats over the past 14 week relationship, we texted eachother exactly half of those days, and she initiated exactly half. So in other words, we each initiate once every 4 days, with an average of 4 texts per day (8 per conversation). This formula led to lots of sex over the long run. Sometimes you need to go 2 weeks with zero communication. Texting her "what's up" every 4 hours is the worst thing you can do.

Worst possible text? "You home?"

 

[AttackFormation]

Sounds like too much investment from you. Women want a guy that's available, but not too available. I had a girl today say "I know you're looking at my snapchats, but you not responding is turning me on so much, so mysterious"

How is not responding "mysterious"? My god, they still keep surprising me with how infantile their thought processes can be. That girl cant be over 18, if that

 

[CMNILS87]

How is not responding "mysterious"? My god, they still keep surprising me with how infantile their thought processes can be. That girl cant be over 18, if that

She's 27 and is a dirty girl

 

[Ryan Adams]

Update if anyone gives a fvck: i slowed wayyyy down on the contact. She initiates everything from now on i respond but its not nearly what it was. The topic of me coming over came up and i said so what day are you free for that. She said honestly i dont know yet i have to check my schedule when i get home. (Shes at her sisters house hours away) then she asked me what day im free i said either thurs or fri. So i mean there's that.... she still snapchats me her with her family doing stuff alot to which i usually have either no or little response to. Idk why she snapchats me with her fam but she does.

 

[CMNILS87]

Update if anyone gives a fvck: i slowed wayyyy down on the contact. She initiates everything from now on i respond but its not nearly what it was. The topic of me coming over came up and i said so what day are you free for that. She said honestly i dont know yet i have to check my schedule when i get home. (Shes at her sisters house hours away) then she asked me what day im free i said either thurs or fri. So i mean there's that.... she still snapchats me her with her family doing stuff alot to which i usually have either no or little response to. Idk why she snapchats me with her fam but she does.

She's keeping contact. Everyone will be whishy washy during holidays. Don't take it personal. Wait till later in the week. Ask her for her days available and if they match yours. If she gives a sketchy answer, back off and go no contact till she reintiates. Don't accept that I may be Available bull ****, you make a hard date and she accepts or not.