@ImTheDoubleGreatest! There's a lot of wisdom in the replies ITT.
The desire you feel is one that is super strongly socially conditioned into young men. Every movie you've watched, every song you've listened to, every book you've read has told you that the happy ending is getting the girl (for the most part). And at your age where there's a lot of uncertainty--about who you are, about what you want, about what you're going to do with your life, about how you'll handle situations you haven't experienced before--the idea of a girl who 'completes you' and offers a stabilizing influence is particularly seductive. So you should be mindful--but not necessarily guarded of your emotions.
Suppressing that desire might protect you from pain, but at the expense of a full range of experience & the growth that comes with it. And when you do meet a girl who seems to tick off the boxes and you let your guard down then all that withheld love will come out and you'll attribute it to her.
I'd advocate practicing love as a default state. I pretty much love everybody, which keeps my emotional assets well-diversified--my life is full of an abundance of love. At the same time, you do have to make rational decisions about the role other people fit in your life. So while I love everyone--or do my damnedest lol--I'm very selective about who gets my investment.
The truth is, is that there is no one. But if you can cast judgments aside (which almost always comes from weakness--the need to protect yourself or feel superior to other people or to justify your own actions), there are thousands of girls who are perfect for right now. You might never want them as a wife, but they're the one for tonight, they're the one for this month. They perfectly match the current needs of the various stages of your life--and when you get a little older, you'll realize how diverse your own needs/desires are for a partner and how often those needs/desires change.
My life is constantly enriched, and often is surprising ways, by the women I bring into it--even if they are someone I'd never give monogamy to in a million years lol. My relationships are short these days--but they're perfect, if that makes sense.
The desire you feel is one that is super strongly socially conditioned into young men. Every movie you've watched, every song you've listened to, every book you've read has told you that the happy ending is getting the girl (for the most part). And at your age where there's a lot of uncertainty--about who you are, about what you want, about what you're going to do with your life, about how you'll handle situations you haven't experienced before--the idea of a girl who 'completes you' and offers a stabilizing influence is particularly seductive. So you should be mindful--but not necessarily guarded of your emotions.
Suppressing that desire might protect you from pain, but at the expense of a full range of experience & the growth that comes with it. And when you do meet a girl who seems to tick off the boxes and you let your guard down then all that withheld love will come out and you'll attribute it to her.
I'd advocate practicing love as a default state. I pretty much love everybody, which keeps my emotional assets well-diversified--my life is full of an abundance of love. At the same time, you do have to make rational decisions about the role other people fit in your life. So while I love everyone--or do my damnedest lol--I'm very selective about who gets my investment.
The truth is, is that there is no one. But if you can cast judgments aside (which almost always comes from weakness--the need to protect yourself or feel superior to other people or to justify your own actions), there are thousands of girls who are perfect for right now. You might never want them as a wife, but they're the one for tonight, they're the one for this month. They perfectly match the current needs of the various stages of your life--and when you get a little older, you'll realize how diverse your own needs/desires are for a partner and how often those needs/desires change.
My life is constantly enriched, and often is surprising ways, by the women I bring into it--even if they are someone I'd never give monogamy to in a million years lol. My relationships are short these days--but they're perfect, if that makes sense.
