I need to harden up my heart more

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I have to admit, I still feel like I am at least somewhat waiting for that special someone someday and I cannot get it out of my head. It's almost as if it is attached to the very core of my being. But I want to get rid of it. That's pvssy sh!t right there. I need to get tougher and colder. No love. I can apply this to other areas of my life as well and it would be beneficial. I am already hardened up in some aspects, but I need to do it more. What are some ways you guys have been able to?

 

[TheGambino]

My feelings/heart are grey now. They were red years ago, I could fly in the sky about a girl. Now I could make out and have s3x for lust pure lust, I have 0 affection towards the girl. But other girls could drive me back to the red area again but I will never get strung up with a girl like years ago and I could only feel affection towards a girl IF we made out etc and I know her for a longer time.

Theres no ''someone'' there are millions of girls on the planet that are going to be a very good match with every single one of us. Keep spinning plates, I tell that myself too, it's the best way to not get oneitis.

 

[Poon King]

Its all about being realistic.

You have to learn to see a situation for what it is.. not what you wish it was or want it to be. Once you can do this.. the next step is to ask yourself the following question in all situations:

Is this good for me?

If the answer is NO then go down a different road.

The problem in romantic relationships is men are easily manipulated. For some stupid reason.. a lot of men act like they are "lucky" to be with any woman they get. Men act like women are so scarce and so unique. Only after being with many, many women did I learn how similar, predictable and boring most women are.

I used to think every new woman I met was "special" and say "Wow.. she is so different from the others!". But over time every woman has proven more or less to be exactly like the others down the road. And I've messed with women of all different races and class levels. This is why I prefer plate spinning. Women are at their best early in the relationship. This is when they put on the "act" because they want to seduce you. Over time, they become more entitled and want more things on their terms. I have experienced no exceptions to this rule. Even the most submissive, passive, dainty woman you can find will eventually try to manipulate things to her advantage. This is because "relationships" are woman's domain. So as long as a man feels the need to cling to a relationship.. he gives up his power and leverage. There is no way around it. Refusing to fully commit financially, emotionally and legally is the only way to keep women on their toes.

You don't even need to "harden up" necessarily. You just need to see all situations for what they are and act in a way that benefits you most. Its easier than you think.

 

[sazc]

Take it SLOW with females. They will show you who they are eventually. Never let someone in unless they have shown you that you can trust them.

If you do make exceptions, go into it being honest about it with yourself and admitting to yourself that you are being open and it may backfire, but at least you will know who that other person really is

 

[Poon King]

Take it SLOW with females. They will show you who they are eventually. Never let someone in unless they have shown you that you can trust them.

You should know better.

Taking it slow with women doesn't mean sh!t. Women will keep the "act" going as long as they need to. For instance.. lets say a woman is about 27 years old and she decides she wants to settle down and have kids. This is her agenda. So once she meets a man that meets her qualifications she will start the seduction process on him by submitting to his terms. Once he is seduced and feeling "lucky" and "trusting her" THAT is when she will slowly start to push her own agenda.

And women are crafty. They don't hit you with it fast. They ease into it. The man is already feeling "lucky" so when the woman's behavior changes he is quick to become insecure and try to "fix it". Because most men are insecure faggots that way. In his attempt to "fix it" he will be submitting to the woman's agenda. This continues until the woman gets what she wants.

100% of human beings have agendas. These agendas don't magically go away just because you "take it slow". You just waste valuable time and money you could of used sport f*cking other women. This is why men should spin plates. If a particular plate tries to push her agenda or some other bullsh!t its easier to ignore her because there isn't anything she can take from you.

 

[marmel75]

This happens because you think you need someone or something to be happy or to be fulfilled in life but you don't.

Your happiness lies inside of you, and only you can get that figured out. It won't be found by being with someone else.

 

[sazc]

You should know better.

Taking it slow with women doesn't mean sh!t. Women will keep the "act" going as long as they need to. For instance.. lets say a woman is about 27 years old and she decides she wants to settle down and have kids. This is her agenda. So once she meets a man that meets her qualifications she will start the seduction process on him by submitting to his terms. Once he is seduced and feeling "lucky" and "trusting her" THAT is when she will slowly start to push her own agenda.

And women are crafty. They don't hit you with it fast. They ease into it. The man is already feeling "lucky" so when the woman's behavior changes he is quick to become insecure and try to "fix it". Because most men are insecure faggots that way. In his attempt to "fix it" he will be submitting to the woman's agenda. This continues until the woman gets what she wants.

100% of human beings have agendas. These agendas don't magically go away just because you "take it slow". You just waste valuable time and money you could of used sport f*cking other women. This is why men should spin plates. If a particular plate tries to push her agenda or some other bullsh!t its easier to ignore her because there isn't anything she can take from you.

Lol, I only counted 3 cuss words, ringing in 2017 in style, baby!

I don't disagree with anything you said. Spin as many plates as you can so you can get to know your females. But for the more LTR minded men, what's the threshold where they can feel good/safe about investing a little?

I guess this threshold is to be tempered with the idea that you are detached enough to leave if things get ridiculous.

Come on, you've got a ton of insight and not every man wants to only spin plates forever. Surely you've got some wisdom to throw down on this idea? What's a good indicator that she is loyal minded @Poon King ?

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Its all about being realistic.

You have to learn to see a situation for what it is.. not what you wish it was or want it to be. Once you can do this.. the next step is to ask yourself the following question in all situations:

Is this good for me?

If the answer is NO then go down a different road.

The problem in romantic relationships is men are easily manipulated. For some stupid reason.. a lot of men act like they are "lucky" to be with any woman they get. Men act like women are so scarce and so unique. Only after being with many, many women did I learn how similar, predictable and boring most women are.

I used to think every new woman I met was "special" and say "Wow.. she is so different from the others!". But over time every woman has proven more or less to be exactly like the others down the road. And I've messed with women of all different races and class levels. This is why I prefer plate spinning. Women are at their best early in the relationship. This is when they put on the "act" because they want to seduce you. Over time, they become more entitled and want more things on their terms. I have experienced no exceptions to this rule. Even the most submissive, passive, dainty woman you can find will eventually try to manipulate things to her advantage. This is because "relationships" are woman's domain. So as long as a man feels the need to cling to a relationship.. he gives up his power and leverage. There is no way around it. Refusing to fully commit financially, emotionally and legally is the only way to keep women on their toes.

You don't even need to "harden up" necessarily. You just need to see all situations for what they are and act in a way that benefits you most. Its easier than you think.

I understand. I do see things for how they are. But if something unpleasant happens to me because of a woman I was intimate with, I sometimes have that sickly feeling for about an hour, 2 at most, and then it goes away. That is a hell of a lot better than most people, but it still shows that it affected me. I desire that genuine outcome independence where I truly would not think twice about some female screwing me over.

This happens because you think you need someone or something to be happy or to be fulfilled in life but you don't.

Your happiness lies inside of you, and only you can get that figured out. It won't be found by being with someone else.

I did not consider this. But given my current state of mind, it makes 100% sense and is most likely the issue at hand. Thank you.

 

[Poon King]

Lol, I only counted 3 cuss words, ringing in 2017 in style, baby!

I don't disagree with anything you said. Spin as many plates as you can so you can get to know your females. But for the more LTR minded men, what's the threshold where they can feel good/safe about investing a little?

I guess this threshold is to be tempered with the idea that you are detached enough to leave if things get ridiculous.

Come on, you've got a ton of insight and not every man wants to only spin plates forever. Surely you've got some wisdom to throw down on this idea? What's a good indicator that she is loyal minded @Poon King ?

There is no such thing as "loyal". That word was created in Disneyland.

Even your dog will abandon you if you stop feeding it. All creatures are earth exist to fulfill their own agenda. No exceptions.

My advice to LTR minded men is to always have leverage. Dependency is the only thing that guarantees loyalty (see by dog example). Find a way to keep your woman dependent on you (emotionally, financially or otherwise). Otherwise get comfortable with the idea that you relationship might go down the toilet one day.

I personally find co-dependency to be a game you can't win and such people are destine for suffering no matter what they do.

 

[Poon King]

I understand. I do see things for how they are. But if something unpleasant happens to me because of a woman I was intimate with, I sometimes have that sickly feeling for about an hour, 2 at most, and then it goes away. That is a hell of a lot better than most people, but it still shows that it affected me. I desire that genuine outcome independence where I truly would not think twice about some female screwing me over.

Honestly bro.. probably never going to happen.

Human's are social animals and other people will always effect us emotionally. The key is stoicism. Learn to be comfortable with discomfort.

I would be lying if I told you women never have any emotional effect on me. They do. But I have reached a point where I'm ok with it because I know I'm willing to do what needs to be done for myself even if I experience emotional pain.

I've dumped women I really liked before because I new it had to be done. I still wanted to talk to them, f*ck them, flirt with them, etc. I walked away because I saw the big picture. I knew I was on a path to hell. Its about seeing down the road and being smart. Is not about always "feeling good".

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Honestly bro.. probably never going to happen.

Human's are social animals and other people will always effect us emotionally. The key is stoicism. Learn to be comfortable with discomfort.

I would be lying if I told you women never have any emotional effect on me. They do. But I have reached a point where I'm ok with it because I know I'm willing to do what needs to be done for myself even if I experience emotional pain.

I've dumped women I really liked before because I new it had to be done. I still wanted to talk to them, f*ck them, flirt with them, etc. I walked away because I saw the big picture. I knew I was on a path to hell. Its about seeing down the road and being smart. Is not about always "feeling good".

That makes sense. So perseverance and logic is what you're saying?

 

[bigneil]

I have to admit, I still feel like I am at least somewhat waiting for that special someone someday and I cannot get it out of my head. It's almost as if it is attached to the very core of my being. But I want to get rid of it. That's pvssy sh!t right there. I need to get tougher and colder. No love. I can apply this to other areas of my life as well and it would be beneficial. I am already hardened up in some aspects, but I need to do it more. What are some ways you guys have been able to?

The special someone exists. You still need to harden so, when you find her, you can hold out for the 90+ days it will take for HER to think you're her special someone. You also need to be the guy she is looking for when you find her. Easier said than done with today's women who want, as nismo says, and I paraphrase, a millionaire model in a Mercedes. You must be a master detective solving the mystery of whether she loves you back.

By hardening it means not telling her how you feel, and keeping other women available. What I would do with one girl was (under the covers) say her name and she would say "yes?" and I wouldn't answer. But after 3 months it's ok to tell them you love them as long as they reciprocate.

 

[Poon King]

That makes sense. So perseverance and logic is what you're saying?

What is the alternative?

The combination of wisdom and logic can't be beat when it comes to having personal power. Always do right by yourself and you can't lose.

 

[Ratiocinative]

The emotion isn't the problem. The problem is the way you express it. Society teaches men to express their emotion with words, but to attract women you must express your desire for her with action.

This isn't to say you should never use words, but your words need to be congruent with your actions. That's why being friends with a woman doesn't work. Wanting a woman sexually but not asking her out on dates and escalating is incongruent and offputting to them.

Also, don't confuse lust for love. You can't love someone you just met, so of course saying you love her after a few dates is incongruent. Understand you simply find her attractive and don't be ashamed to tell her you think she's sexy, just be congruent and act on those feelings to by being sexual with her.

 

[bigneil]

Also, don't confuse lust for love.

I recently learned the difference.

Lust is the good feeling you have when you have sex with her.

Love is the good feeling you have when you hold her. It is literally a falling, weightless, giddy sensation. Both of you will know it.

Now, the key to "making love" (note I always hated that term while millennials hold up a cross if you say it), is have to sex (lust) with her as you hold her this way (love). There is nothing like it (lust + love = true ecstasy). This is the traditional romantic scene often shown in old movies and cartoons where the man and woman keep saying one another's names over and over.

 

[exhausted]

One of the most important pieces of advice I can ever give from my own game is to never take this sh*t seriously.

I actually enjoy some of the blue-pill stuff. I enjoy it the same way that I enjoy the WWE wrestling. I know it's all a work, yet I suspend my disbelief and enjoy the show regardless. I don't give a flying fvck

To do that from abundance is a strength. As Robert Greene calls it in his rules of attraction: "the rake, or the natural."

You don't need to "harden your heart". You need to open your heart to as many women as you can possibly game at one time.

Have fun.

That is the problem tho with so many of us. Have gone thro so much **** the mentality is not there to have fun and be free mentally.
I feel more hurt from things just never working out than the specific girl herself.

 

[Trump]

Its all about being realistic.

You have to learn to see a situation for what it is.. not what you wish it was or want it to be. Once you can do this.. the next step is to ask yourself the following question in all situations:

Is this good for me?

If the answer is NO then go down a different road.

The problem in romantic relationships is men are easily manipulated. For some stupid reason.. a lot of men act like they are "lucky" to be with any woman they get. Men act like women are so scarce and so unique. Only after being with many, many women did I learn how similar, predictable and boring most women are.

I used to think every new woman I met was "special" and say "Wow.. she is so different from the others!". But over time every woman has proven more or less to be exactly like the others down the road. And I've messed with women of all different races and class levels. This is why I prefer plate spinning. Women are at their best early in the relationship. This is when they put on the "act" because they want to seduce you. Over time, they become more entitled and want more things on their terms. I have experienced no exceptions to this rule. Even the most submissive, passive, dainty woman you can find will eventually try to manipulate things to her advantage. This is because "relationships" are woman's domain. So as long as a man feels the need to cling to a relationship.. he gives up his power and leverage. There is no way around it. Refusing to fully commit financially, emotionally and legally is the only way to keep women on their toes.

You don't even need to "harden up" necessarily. You just need to see all situations for what they are and act in a way that benefits you most. Its easier than you think.

Poon I got a question on this. Your posts are very good as usual but how do you feel when you see all your friends, acquaintances, coworkers, family members get married and their wives get pregnant. The husband may or may not be beta but the wife is very educated and they seem very happy and content with their lives. I don't think the husband is giving up power and leverage and they both seem very very happy . Do you that brush that off?

 

[Desdinova]

have to admit, I still feel like I am at least somewhat waiting for that special someone someday and I cannot get it out of my head. It's almost as if it is attached to the very core of my being. But I want to get rid of it. That's pvssy sh!t right there.

You know what? There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a fantastic companion to travel through life with.

There are a lot of guys here who claim that men are not wired to be monogamous. I don't buy it. I think men are wired to have the desire to fvck anything that looks good, but I think a lot of us also want the companionship part of it as well. If it were my choice, I would be completely cool with having multiple wives. That is fvcking heaven. Have one with a really hot ass, one with a cute face, a blonde, a brunette, one that cooks, one that cleans, etc etc. Because they're all competing for my attention, they would have their own built-in drama to keep their lives interesting, and I would just ignore all that bull5hit.

Unfortunately, the laws and (most) of society aren't cool with men having multiple wives. In other words, we can't have multiple pvssies to fvck and have the companionship of all these women. We are forced to settle with one woman to fulfil all of our needs. My GF treats me awesome, but I'm more fond of brunettes and women who are a bit shorter than her. I've realised that I can't have it all. I have to pick whoever's going to suit me and stick with that if I want the companionship. If I just wanted to fvck a bunch of hot women, I'd have to forfeit the companionship for hot ass.

If you truly want the companionship instead of multitudes of hot ass, then screen the women you date for good companionship. An all-in-one solution isn't going to exist.

That's pvssy sh!t right there. I need to get tougher and colder. No love.

Remember, we are all humans, not robots. We're going to feel emotions for some of the women we fvck. That is perfectly normal. Shutting your emotions off is going to make you miserable. The good news is you're on this site, and you know that you can always find another woman when one bytch breaks your heart. You know you have the power and ability to move on.

The best thing I can suggest is to figure out what you need the most out of a woman, and then go find a woman who is going to fulfil that need. Date like a madman, screen out the slvtty pieces of 5hit, drop the bytches who don't measure up to your high standards, and you'll eventually be able to find one who will meat your criteria.

 

[Poon King]

Poon I got a question on this. Your posts are very good as usual but how do you feel when you see all your friends, acquaintances, coworkers, family members get married and their wives get pregnant. The husband may or may not be beta but the wife is very educated and they seem very happy and content with their lives. I don't think the husband is giving up power and leverage and they both seem very very happy . Do you that brush that off?

Here is one way to look at it:

Lets say you don't like chicken and go out to a restaurant with a group of friends, acquaintances, coworkers and family members. When its time to order, you get steak and everyone else gets chicken. When they get their chicken they really enjoy it and seem very happy and content with their meal. How do you feel about that? And from my perspective.. they will all get food poisoning a day later no matter how "happy" they are now.

Marriage doesn't benefit men in 2017. Kids are something I haven't decided on yet. I don't care if others have something I don't want for myself.

 

[bigneil]

Kids are something I haven't decided on yet. I don't care if others have something I don't want for myself.

If the day comes when a girl who makes me weak in the knees begs me to impregnate her, and I'm gainfully employed, I might do it. Otherwise, no.