Got dumped by girlfriend 2 months ago

[lizardking82]

I had a girlfriend like that too, some women are just really good at hiding it. Sometimes theyll actually act even more loving than usual while when they start thinking about leaving. I would compare it to leaving a job where you may act extra diligent and kind to your boss because you don't want him to suspect that you're looking for other jobs or you might even feel bad about what you're doing. Ironically although that girl was a chronic cheater and Incredibly disloyal she was probably the most normal and empathetic of the bunch of exes I've had.

Most aren't though, theyll stop coming to see you, new hobbies and friends, pick more fights and start flaking etc, basically devalue, dehumanize, and throw you in the trash.

We had a couple of fights in the 5-6 last months, but absolutely nothing more or less of what we'd had before. Then, the night she asked for space we had a bigger than usual fight in front of another couple we know long time. I yelled at her, but said I was sorry for lashing out and I didn't mean to offend her. Like, I understand what Poon King says about beta males that want the girl to commit badly, but this is not my case. We had a plan to leave for Germany, but it's not like I pushed and pushed for her to come, she herself said she liked Germany and felt awesome by the plan itself. but she has this thing that she thinks she can have it good with everyone AND that is why she doesn't say no to anyone, especially her dad and family in general. Throughout this last year or so, I had pushed her a bit to get out of the nest mentally and start saying no to her dad for some very basic things. Yet, I think she has a very disfunctional, superficial relationship with her dad and hides a lot of things from him. Never liked that about her because I thought she could be hiding **** from me as well and... it turns out, she kinda was because she said she's not been feeling that comfortable in the last 6 months but still chose not to throw me a word about it and that's what made me mad. I mean, normal people who are average at communicating things should normally be able to tell you what's bothering them, right? She said "I thought those things would get fixed with time". It was like someone slapping my face. Like her saying "I felt sth, I know what it was, I took the decision not to tell you and based on that decision SHE then took the decision to cut it off". It didn't only make me feel like ****, it made me feel powerless. Like my heart was being broken and noone gave a **** about me in the process.

And me and her were absolutely a piece of cake together. Her friends, her girlfriends, they were kinda licking me all over whenever we used to go out with them. I could literally feel their eyes saying "oh, girl, you got something special in this guy". Her sister didn't like me although I invited her to have a drink with us several times, but she was too lazy (and stupid, like my ex used to say about her). This September she started a university and she felt crazily happy, but her happiness will slowly fade cause this is an Arts university in Albania and I know it's **** after the couple first months go by. Strange, though, I was literally a lot into this girl cause of how sweet she was, how original, always made me little handmade gifts. And she felt like a ****in' queen amongst her friends everytime I showed up cause she has all these model friends and their boyfriends never showed up at their work to surprise them while I did. And no, I didn't do it for approval or to try and please her, it was just sheer desire and passion to see this girl happy because she was making me happy, too. That's all

 

[btownbuck2012]

Once women lose attraction they usually lose respect too. They also drop their "act".

You mentioned how you don't know who she is anymore. Well.. what you are seeing is her true personality now that she no longer wants you or needs you. Women put on an "act" when they want you. Once they lose interest.. they show their true cold hearted colors.

Chasing women and clinging to them is demeaning, degrading and pointless. Women despise men that show any weakness, because they want to be taken care of. They don't want to be your mother. So when a woman wants to leave you should never resist. Not even a little bit. Welcome it. The only thing you should resist is any attempt she makes to get back together. Women only get one chance to dump you (if you respect yourself). Once a woman dumps you she is demoted to sex toy / booty call at most. She should be blacklisted from your emotional life for eternity (again.. if you respect yourself).

Finally.. its important to remember that we are living in a time where female hypergamy is supported, rewarded and encouraged. So the chances of any woman you date (specially at your age) sticking with you for life is very low. Most women don't start becoming insecure enough to stay loyal until their 30's.

MEN: Never take women under 30 seriously and you will save yourself a lot of emotional suffering, no matter what your age.

^ some of the realist **** on this entire forum.

 

[lizardking82]

UPDATE: About a week has gone by since I removed her from Facebook and unfollowed her from Instagram and two things that could be worth saying have happened.

1) I got this girl come over at my place about a few days ago and exactly later on that night, after she left, my ex follows her on Instagram and sends her a friend request... ?

2) Two days ago she writes to a girl friend of mine and tells her sth without much meaning, asking her for a favor, then she doesn't answer back. She never wrote to this girl before.

Any thoughts?

 

[logicallefty]

UPDATE: About a week has gone by since I removed her from Facebook and unfollowed her from Instagram and two things that could be worth saying have happened.

1) I got this girl come over at my place about a few days ago and exactly later on that night, after she left, my ex follows her on Instagram and sends her a friend request... ?

2) Two days ago she writes to a girl friend of mine and tells her sth without much meaning, asking her for a favor, then she doesn't answer back. She never wrote to this girl before.

Any thoughts?

Geez sounds like she is stalking you. Is there a connection of any kind between the girl you had over to your place, and the ex? Mutual friends online or in the real world? Do they work together or go to school together? The female friend you both mutually know would be a good place to start..

In situation like this, I might try working it backwards for starters. Say something to the girl you had over that you have never said before ever to anyone.. Like one I did one time: LL:"I applied for this great job in Tennessee. If I get it I am moving.". Then see who you know who might say something like "I heard you were moving to Tennessee". That may give you a clue on where the trickle of info is flowing.. Somewhere, somehow, the ex is getting intel on you, and you need to find the leak and stop it.

 

[lizardking82]

Geez sounds like she is stalking you. Is there a connection of any kind between the girl you had over to your place, and the ex? Mutual friends online or in the real world? Do they work together or go to school together? The female friend you both mutually know would be a good place to start..

In situation like this, I might try working it backwards for starters. Say something to the girl you had over that you have never said before ever to anyone.. Like one I did one time: LL:"I applied for this great job in Tennessee. If I get it I am moving.". Then see who you know who might say something like "I heard you were moving to Tennessee". That may give you a clue on where the trickle of info is flowing.. Somewhere, somehow, the ex is getting intel on you, and you need to find the leak and stop it.

They go to the same university. However, my ex is first year, this girl is third year. They have never spoken to each other ever, but it was kinda strange, man. Like, what are the odds?

And then she writes to my other girl friend... who she's been casually friends on Facebook with for about a year, but never written to her. Her message was "I need you to do me a favor because you're the only one that seems to be online right now and I got a problem with my internet connection" and she sent this through Messenger I mean, you cannot have a problem with your internet connection and send a message through Messenger, goddamn it AND then, when my friend answered "sure, tell me", she didn't respond back anymore...

I don't wanna do anything about this, but I am just curios if she's stalkin'

 

[El Payaso]

They go to the same university. However, my ex is first year, this girl is third year. They have never spoken to each other ever, but it was kinda strange, man. Like, what are the odds?

And then she writes to my other girl friend... who she's been casually friends on Facebook with for about a year, but never written to her. Her message was "I need you to do me a favor because you're the only one that seems to be online right now and I got a problem with my internet connection" and she sent this through Messenger I mean, you cannot have a problem with your internet connection and send a message through Messenger, goddamn it AND then, when my friend answered "sure, tell me", she didn't respond back anymore...

I don't wanna do anything about this, but I am just curios if she's stalkin'

Just keep moving on. Don't let her get in your head.

 

[sazc]

Just keep moving on. Don't let her get in your head.

exactly - it kinda feels like you are hoping it means something but NONE of that matters. What are YOU doing with your days and nights now that you have free time? How are you living your life such that you dont have time to think about this chick? That's what I want to hear.

 

[lizardking82]

exactly - it kinda feels like you are hoping it means something but NONE of that matters. What are YOU doing with your days and nights now that you have free time? How are you living your life such that you dont have time to think about this chick? That's what I want to hear.

I have been dealing with my own things for at least 3 weeks now so there is no stopping progress in that. It is just that it was a bit strange to find these two things out, that's all.

 

[mikey2012]

Once women lose attraction they usually lose respect too. They also drop their "act".

You mentioned how you don't know who she is anymore. Well.. what you are seeing is her true personality now that she no longer wants you or needs you. Women put on an "act" when they want you. Once they lose interest.. they show their true cold hearted colors.

Chasing women and clinging to them is demeaning, degrading and pointless. Women despise men that show any weakness, because they want to be taken care of. They don't want to be your mother. So when a woman wants to leave you should never resist. Not even a little bit. Welcome it. The only thing you should resist is any attempt she makes to get back together. Women only get one chance to dump you (if you respect yourself). Once a woman dumps you she is demoted to sex toy / booty call at most. She should be blacklisted from your emotional life for eternity (again.. if you respect yourself).

Finally.. its important to remember that we are living in a time where female hypergamy is supported, rewarded and encouraged. So the chances of any woman you date (specially at your age) sticking with you for life is very low. Most women don't start becoming insecure enough to stay loyal until their 30's.

MEN: Never take women under 30 seriously and you will save yourself a lot of emotional suffering, no matter what your age.

Yes

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I have been dealing with my own things for at least 3 weeks now so there is no stopping progress in that. It is just that it was a bit strange to find these two things out, that's all.

How much progress have you made without the dead weight?

 

[lizardking82]

Man, it's been almost 2 years now since this happened. It's almost December 2018, almost 2 years since this thread was started. I got over this girl around May/June 2017 and from there on it's been a girl fest for me. I have had sex with over 20 different girls from May/June 2017 until now. That might not be much for US standard, but it's quite a lot for Albania. I have evolved in every possible aspect, as a man, as a professional (photography). I don't even mind girls anymore now, I got plenty, now I am hungry for progress on the professional side.

 

[nicksaiz65]

Man, it's been almost 2 years now since this happened. It's almost December 2018, almost 2 years since this thread was started. I got over this girl around May/June 2017 and from there on it's been a girl fest for me. I have had sex with over 20 different girls from May/June 2017 until now. That might not be much for US standard, but it's quite a lot for Albania. I have evolved in every possible aspect, as a man, as a professional (photography). I don't even mind girls anymore now, I got plenty, now I am hungry for progress on the professional side.

20 lays and succeeding professionally? Wow, teach me your ways. Great job.

 

[Spaz]

Man, it's been almost 2 years now since this happened. It's almost December 2018, almost 2 years since this thread was started. I got over this girl around May/June 2017 and from there on it's been a girl fest for me. I have had sex with over 20 different girls from May/June 2017 until now. That might not be much for US standard, but it's quite a lot for Albania. I have evolved in every possible aspect, as a man, as a professional (photography). I don't even mind girls anymore now, I got plenty, now I am hungry for progress on the professional side.

When women r bountiful in ur life, then it's a sure sign u hv ur shiet together.

The next stage and an important one is accumulating power.

 

[lizardking82]

20 lays and succeeding professionally? Wow, teach me your ways. Great job.

I would not say I am succeeding professionally. It is actually quite hard when you choose to become a freelancer at something, you have to work your way up and I am trying hard and the progress is slow, but it's happening. I will tell when I am succeeding, but right now, that would be lying to myself and to you, too.

 

[evan12]

how could she miss me when she also sees my posts on Instagram everyday? I feel a bit awkward, but yeah, I deleted her online after 2 months.

You ego prevent you from accepting she no longer want you or love you , accept that .
you need to new start , stop thinking about her .

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Man, it's been almost 2 years now since this happened. It's almost December 2018, almost 2 years since this thread was started. I got over this girl around May/June 2017 and from there on it's been a girl fest for me. I have had sex with over 20 different girls from May/June 2017 until now. That might not be much for US standard, but it's quite a lot for Albania. I have evolved in every possible aspect, as a man, as a professional (photography). I don't even mind girls anymore now, I got plenty, now I am hungry for progress on the professional side.

Did you ever fvck the ex after getting girls?

 

[lizardking82]

Did you ever fvck the ex after getting girls?

Nope. I can't see her as "just **** material" although I would probably, from a physical standpoint, enjoy bangin her again. But better leave old feelings where they belong: in the past. You go ****ing around with people you used to love (or at least thought you loved at the time) and sh1t might get confusing. No need for that. Plus, she got a boyfriend 2-3 months after me with which, as far as I know, they're still together.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Nope. I can't see her as "just **** material" although I would probably, from a physical standpoint, enjoy bangin her again. But better leave old feelings where they belong: in the past. You go ****ing around with people you used to love (or at least thought you loved at the time) and sh1t might get confusing. No need for that. Plus, she got a boyfriend 2-3 months after me with which, as far as I know, they're still together.

I can do it. Fvck a friend well where theres mutual attraction.

Nobody has to be played.

 

[mikey2012]

No point going back to same well

 

[kbbroiler1971]

Okay sounds like you did everything right except I would not of said happy birthday to her. Why? One thing I learned with women and it doesn’t matter how close you are with them years later your exes will forget your birthday. I remember all my exes birthdays and I’m 47 but i guarantee you she would only contact you not because she cares but to keep her foot in the door. You did the right thing by totally ghosting the woman. This is what your mindset has to be. Ok I wasn’t good enough for you and she made that choice. Don’t let her come back into your world. Me personally I have cut exes out of my life and made my position clear where I stand with that. Social media is good for one thing because these women always check up on you but for me I made my position known don’t contact me. I have friends of exes who probably told her so I didn’t even have to tell her to **** off. Someone else did that. I don’t feel sorry either. You shouldn’t feel sorry for doing that because she made the choice to leave and she has to accept the consequences for her actions on what she did to you. You have to keep frame and if she attempts to come back at any level you drop kick her to the uprights.