How to up her interest?

[imported]

This is about 1 of my serious plates. Gone on 7 dates over 6 weeks, we're both in our mid 20's. I thought her interest was about 80% on date 6 but after date 7 her interest is probably 70% or less.

When I called her on Monday there was a noticeable loss of enthusiasm compared to the week before. Also when I tried to make a date for this Sunday she said that she wants to but doesn't want to disrupt my plans (she knows I usually go to the lounge/dayout with my dad on sundays). I think either her interest level isn't high enough to ask me to cancel my plans so I can spend it with her or she's using it as an excuse to not have a date.

On the plus side she still posts instagram photos from our dates. She said she doesn't have any plans on Sunday and that it's up to me if I want a date (but there is no enthusiasm behind it like before). Also on our most recent date she brought me chocolates.

My first instinct is to just back off including all forms of communication and make our next date 2 weeks from the last date we had (instead of the usual 5-7 days) although it would be nice to have a date on Sunday. What should I do?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

This is about 1 of my serious plates. Gone on 7 dates over 6 weeks, we're both in our mid 20's. I thought her interest was about 80% on date 6 but after date 7 her interest is probably 70% or less.

When I called her on Monday there was a noticeable loss of enthusiasm compared to the week before. Also when I tried to make a date for this Sunday she said that she wants to but doesn't want to disrupt my plans (she knows I usually go to the lounge/dayout with my dad on sundays). I think either her interest level isn't high enough to ask me to cancel my plans so I can spend it with her or she's using it as an excuse to not have a date.

On the plus side she still posts instagram photos from our dates. She said she doesn't have any plans on Sunday and that it's up to me if I want a date (but there is no enthusiasm behind it like before). Also on our most recent date she brought me chocolates.

My first instinct is to just back off including all forms of communication and make our next date 2 weeks from the last date we had (instead of the usual 5-7 days) although it would be nice to have a date on Sunday. What should I do?

Be in a couple places she knows people with other females. That spark of you managing your plates might wake her up. New "giddy" excitement never lasts forever.

 

[imported]

Be in a couple places she knows people with other females. That spark of you managing your plates might wake her up. New "giddy" excitement never lasts forever.

She saw some of my social media and on our last date asked if I was dating anyone else. I said yes but I'd like to date just 1 (I got this tip from Doc love's radio show dammit!) and it seemed to lower her interest but she did say that I don't think I could even date someone else when I'm dating you. Bear in mind that there wasn't much enthusiasm behind any of this (she's usually super enthusiastic about everything normally) and I don't think she took it well — her finding out that she's not the only one seemed to lower her interest oddly enough.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

She saw some of my social media and on our last date asked if I was dating anyone else. I said yes but I'd like to date just 1 (I got this tip from Doc love's radio show dammit!) and it seemed to lower her interest but she did say that I don't think I could even date someone else when I'm dating you. Bear in mind that there wasn't much enthusiasm behind any of this (she's usually super enthusiastic about everything normally) and I don't think she took it well.

Only thing she knows is that I'm only having sex with her now (she demanded this as we're doing it unprotected).

She might be a good girl and this knocked her down a peg. In a "hot girl" their competition level will raise and she will turn some orbiters into plates. I think at this point you are allowed to raise her confidence in herself. Reassure her that you just spend time with some other female friends but she's important.

 

[imported]

She might be a good girl and this knocked her down a peg. In a "hot girl" their competition level will raise and she will turn some orbiters into plates. I think at this point you are allowed to raise her confidence in herself. Reassure her that you just spend time with some other female friends but she's important.

Should I back off for a while though or make the Sunday date (I can go out with my dad next week, or probably any other afternoon for that matter)?

This girl is a waitress, gets hit on all day not only by customers but also the manager. She did mention that at work she said that she's "sort of dating someone" (talking about me) and was batting off potentials so I think this is why she was disappointed to find out that I wasn't doing the same.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Should I back off for a while though or make the Sunday date (I can go out with my dad next week, or probably any other afternoon for that matter)?

This girl is a waitress, gets hit on all day not only by customers but also the manager. She did mention that at work she said that she's "sort of dating someone" (talking about me) and was batting off potentials so I think this is why she was disappointed to find out that I wasn't doing the same.

Youll be straight. Spend some time with her and make her the center of attention. If you keep beating her down she may run off. So let her feel good.

 

[pyros]

yeah, go on a date on Sunday and have fun.
Do not mention to her again that you're seing other girls dumbass.

Anyway, I would not set a date for Sunday on Monday. Two days before max.

 

[imported]

yeah, go on a date on Sunday and have fun.
Do not mention to her again that you're seing other girls dumbass.

Anyway, I would not set a date for Sunday on Monday. Two days before max.

I find that setting it ahead raises interest as I don't text/call in between unless it's regarding setting the date, it's like the girl thinks about you all week because of the date she is looking forward to. Our last date was only 3 days after the date before so I think that's where I went wrong.

 

[marmel75]

The number one mistake the vast majority of guys make and continue to make that is holding them back from overwhelming success.

YOU DON'T!!!

You simply spend the time and effort you would take trying to increase her interest which has extremely low chances of success and is never worth the effort, and use it towards finding women who are already interested.

Guys who would simply just do this would AT LEAST double the amount they get laid.

But they won't. They'll keep trying to get the girl who gave them her number to go out with them over and over and over again because they think its easier to try and "make it work" with someone whose number they already have versus getting a new woman or a new number, but it NEVER is.

 

[Meisterman]

One word: ignore

 

[Trump]

This is about 1 of my serious plates. Gone on 7 dates over 6 weeks, we're both in our mid 20's. I thought her interest was about 80% on date 6 but after date 7 her interest is probably 70% or less.

When I called her on Monday there was a noticeable loss of enthusiasm compared to the week before. Also when I tried to make a date for this Sunday she said that she wants to but doesn't want to disrupt my plans (she knows I usually go to the lounge/dayout with my dad on sundays). I think either her interest level isn't high enough to ask me to cancel my plans so I can spend it with her or she's using it as an excuse to not have a date.

On the plus side she still posts instagram photos from our dates. She said she doesn't have any plans on Sunday and that it's up to me if I want a date (but there is no enthusiasm behind it like before). Also on our most recent date she brought me chocolates.

My first instinct is to just back off including all forms of communication and make our next date 2 weeks from the last date we had (instead of the usual 5-7 days) although it would be nice to have a date on Sunday. What should I do?

Where do the guys get the idea that the girl has to be 100% in love with you at all times or you disappear? It's always all or nothing.

Bro as soon as say 'it would be nice to have a date Sunday.' you've made her the focal point of your day. You should be saying 'it would be nice for her join me at the concert Sunday.' that way she doesn't join you, you call someone else and still have a good time. As soon as you make her (or any outside source) the main source of your entertainment, you are screwed.

Enjoy your life, have her come along. Do not have her come along to enjoy your life.

 

[EyeBRollin]

T
When I called her on Monday there was a noticeable loss of enthusiasm compared to the week before. Also when I tried to make a date for this Sunday she said that she wants to but doesn't want to disrupt my plans (she knows I usually go to the lounge/dayout with my dad on sundays). I think either her interest level isn't high enough to ask me to cancel my plans so I can spend it with her or she's using it as an excuse to not have a date.

Sorry bud, it's time for a dose of red pill. She is blowing sunshine up your ass. If she doesn't accept the date, it is a sign of low interest. Period. No if ands or buts about it. Stop rationalizing or you will blow this.

What to do?

Always do the take away. Give her an out, then reset. "ok hun, maybe another time." That's all you have to say. If she really wants to see you, she will take you up on your date offer. Wait another week or two and try again. If she contacts you before then, you try to set the date.

yeah, go on a date on Sunday and have fun.
Do not mention to her again that you're seing other girls dumbass.

Anyway, I would not set a date for Sunday on Monday. Two days before max.

That's a load of garbage. Anything inside of a week is fine. Adults have busy lives. A woman with high interest will spend the whole week thinking about your date. A woman with low interest won't keep the date no matter how far ahead it is.

On the flip side, when you set the date for the next day, you open yourself up to the bitches who will go out with you because they have no other offers for that day. Have a life. Be scarce. Make her schedule your time in advance.

 

[imported]

Anything inside of a week is fine. Adults have busy lives. A woman with high interest will spend the whole week thinking about your date. A woman with low interest won't keep the date no matter how far ahead it is.

On the flip side, when you set the date for the next day, you open yourself up to the bitches who will go out with you because they have no other offers for that day. Have a life. Be scarce. Make her schedule your time in advance.

Yeah that's what I thought and what I've always done.

There is also a complication that is probably driving my reason to date again. We had unprotected sex 3x times in 1 date and ended up finishing inside on the 2nd time. The 3rd time was shortly after and I'm pretty sure I shoved up any existing fluid further. She said she's on the pill and I saw her take it several times (a girl swallowing the pill in front of me is also a turn on) but then after the sex she said she misses or takes late pills all the time. I'm thinking of casually dating her for a further 2 weeks (condom only from now on), casual drop by a store with her and randomly buy & use a pregnancy test to ease my anxiety. Once it turns up negative then I stop dating her.

Good idea or should I just stop dating now and hope she's not dumb enough to not handle it on her own?

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

I thought her interest was about 80% on date 6 but after date 7 her interest is probably 70% or less

Analysis paralysis. You're over-thinking. The only interest level you need concern yourself with is the 49-51% range. That being she either likes you enough to see you, or she doesn't.

On the plus side she still posts instagram photos from our dates.

You're connected on social media, like all of her orbiters and therefore you're not a unique, scarce commodity to her. She doesn't have time to miss and think about you because you're probably spending too much time posting on social media like the rest of the population. You're also placing far too much value on her instagram account; IT DOESN'T MATTER. People post dinner on there for a quick hit of attention, which is forgotten merely hours later. Get with the program, sunshine.....

I think either her interest level isn't high enough to ask me to cancel my plans

Seriously dude.... I want you tell me what's wrong with this sentence......

My first instinct is to just back off including all forms of communication

Good. Now you're talking more sense. You're probably being to metronomic, too predictable and not being creative enough on your dates. Spin more plates.

At the end of the day, people get bored quite quickly in modern relationships. Trust your instinct, if you think she's losing interest, you're probably right. But you can act on it, not necessarily to keep her, but to guard your own interests.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Good idea or should I just stop dating now and hope she's not dumb enough to not handle it on her own?

It's not her fault you don't know how to use a condom. What kind of question is this?

 

[wifehunter]

One word: ignore

"Ignore" can come off, or be misunderstood as abusive... I prefer preoccupied...or occupied. Have something to focus on. Don't orbit her!!! She is the moon, you are the earth.