Playing the online dating game, what first message to write?

[CMNILS87]

I've talked to multiple women on dates and most of them say the guys are so boring. They ask the dumbest generic questions. What do you do, favorite tv show, blah blah.

My opener: "What's one interesting thing about you that most people don't know". With that info you can create a connection to her easily

 

[BeTheChange]

Anyone who says Internet dating gives women all the power isn't doing it right. I have access to literally millions of women at the tip of my fingers. I whack out my smartphone and bam. I haven't even started taking tinder, pof, etc seriously yet and I am chatting to about 20-30 different women at the moment. Normally I deal with these girls when I have nothing better to do (late at night, taking a dump, on the train, etc)

Trust me guys. There are a lot of women who actually use tinder to find relationships. They are out there.

My advice. Spread yourself across multiple apps. I use tinder, happn, once, pof and a number of others. Secondly make sure your pics are all on point. Thirdly I would avoid messages that could be perceived as copy and paste. I tend to mention something in their profile or in one of their pictures. Have fun with it fellas and remember that OD should be one of many methods you use to meet women. Never the sole means.

 

[MrWood]

Me: I'm a/in <occupation>. <your job/thing/hobby> sounds interesting. I'd like to hear about it. Drinks?

this is GOLD
...could be used on insta-dates/day-game as well

 

[marmel75]

That doesn't matter. There's nothing you can say over the computer to increase her interest.

I agree, which is why I used to say as little as possible until we meet.

 

[guru1000]

Too much work in some of these responses to get a date. Who has this kind of time to invest? I certainly don't.

I will always begin with a "Hi":

Then I follow with:

1) Hey, I'm not much into the back and forth exchange of e-mails or penpal thing, but I would like to meet you one night this week for a drink and get to know each other better. Let me know how that sounds to you. =) Guru (if older than 30 yo)

or if 30 yo or younger:

2) "Hey <SN>, how has this site been treating you so far??"

SN: Bla, Bla, Bla

Guru: I know, I know, hundreds of e-mails, 99% "winners." I'm not on here much, but I would like to meet you one night this week for a drink and get to know each other better. Let me know how that sounds to you =) Guru

Any other response other than a yes, I follow with, "Let's chat a bit more, xxx-xxx-xxxx, Guru." Text volley 3-4 times, and ask for the date.

Using this method, I schedule 4-5 dates every weekend. If you use either of the above and don't schedule many dates, this would be an indication that you need stronger pics. In this case, seek a professional photographer, take hundreds of photos wearing suits, casual, and beach wear. Take your best four shots, PS for best lighting, and place them up. Give the girl both alpha and beta hooks in your profile.

I strongly encourage that your emphasis should be placed in your pics, not attempts to close. Time is a valuable resource. And with strong pics, you expend far less effort.

 

[dustmuffin]

This week I have had three f uck closes with 2 different women. Saturdays date texted on Monday that she was horney. I said come over and she did. Sundays date didn't work out. I'm tired of her and am going to drop her.

A woman that I ghosted texted me last night. I'm going to her house to f uck after a date with a differeny woman tonight. Tomorrow a date with a woman I have fuc ked before.

This weekend I'm going to eureka Springs for a long weekend of s ex. The woman I'm going with is paying half of everything.

All were from match and tinder

 

[Glassguy]

This could be something interesting for you guys to chime in on.......

Just based on profiles, pics, etc, this is my ranking from poor to good with the dating sites:

1.) Blendr- Fugly chicks, not sure how some of the trailer trash on there finds an internet connection to get online. By FAR the worst selection of chicks. There are a few 7's sprinkled around on there, but most are a$$ ugly. Get a decent one on the hook and they will certainly bang the daylights out of you. Daddy issues galore...complete, utter fvcked up emotional chicks. Easy bangs but wait till you try to get rid of them!

2.) POF- better looking chicks, most with emotional issues from past relationships that left them damaged and shattered. It seems like every one of them are looking for one of 2 things: some decent guy to quickly tie down and save them from their miserable lives or they are wanting to drop their panties. Both groups want it quickly. I've banged many of chicks off POF while in between LTR's. Most were 7's or 8's. All were within the first week of talking to them. It doesnt matter if they are looking for "no commitment or actively seeking marriage"....play them all the same. They will give it up. POF seems to have the same core group of chicks every time I get back on there which is once every 6 months to year. I will intentionally hid my profile for a few weeks on occasion, throw up a few new pics and its like new meat to these chicks.

3.) Tinder- I believe there are some decent girls on Tinder, some will bang quickly, some need time invested in them first. I have only banged one chick off Tinder and it took me having her come over twice. Not a dime spent on my end either time. Decent girl who wants more and I refuse.

4.) Match- Upscale Tinder. Some decent pulls from Match, most that I have talked to/met up with required a little bit of investing in before they gave it up. Most are looking for relationships. Normally after 3-4 meet ups if I'm not hitting it I bounce.

5.) EHarmony- Best selection of higher quality chicks of any OLD site I have been on. A few easy ones here and there, but it also seems like I have had to put the most work into the ones I've pulled on there.

Thats my breakdown....am I missing any good OLD sites and has anyone else seen different results from these OLD sites? A lot of it can depend on what area you live in too.

 

[SadoMasochrist]

What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo.

 

[Grozer Compozer]

I used to write thoughtful long winded opening messages. The response rate does go up but I don't believe it increases attraction at all. You have to screen for interest.
My last 2 LTRs started with "Hey there" and a cut and paste "So you seem cool. What sort of trouble are you into this week?" One was HB7 7 years younger, the other was HB8 10 years younger.
My pics are ****e (probably why the 9-10s are out of reach, for now) but I get tons of compliments on written portion. Dropping humor and subtle DHVs. Its a numbers game so it sometimes feels like a waste of time to get laid. On the other hand, pulling numbers while pooping at work is magical im its own way.

 

[corrector]

Thanks Mr Wood, really appreciate your advice!

So it looks like you tried Mr Wood's advice and it didn't work out for you? Any updates in any of these other suggestions that posters have made? Has your numbers improved at all?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This works for me. I get plenty of dates with this approach.

Hey xxx whats up?
Your profile caught my eye and I would like to meet you.
We could message endlessly or just meet for drinks.
What is your schedule like this week?

Dustmuffin

Send this message to 5 women. Wait a day for responses. No takers? Send it out to 5 more. It's a game of numbers. I get as many dates as I want with this approach. Last week I had 4 dates. This week I have dates for fri and sat with repeat girls I met on match. I have had sex with one and Im positive I will f uck the other. She has agreed to meet me at my house and we will drive together for the date. If you get them to your house its a good sign that they are DTF. I also have one tomorrow and had two flakes. I have two other girls I could ask out that are repeats for sure sex. Im dropping them because I am tired of them.

I use match, tinder and bumble. I have very good success with match. Ask for the date straight away.

Dude, I have to give you props on this one...

I copied this word for word and have been having great success with it...almost makes it too easy.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This could be something interesting for you guys to chime in on.......

Just based on profiles, pics, etc, this is my ranking from poor to good with the dating sites:

1.) Blendr- Fugly chicks, not sure how some of the trailer trash on there finds an internet connection to get online. By FAR the worst selection of chicks. There are a few 7's sprinkled around on there, but most are a$$ ugly. Get a decent one on the hook and they will certainly bang the daylights out of you. Daddy issues galore...complete, utter fvcked up emotional chicks. Easy bangs but wait till you try to get rid of them!

2.) POF- better looking chicks, most with emotional issues from past relationships that left them damaged and shattered. It seems like every one of them are looking for one of 2 things: some decent guy to quickly tie down and save them from their miserable lives or they are wanting to drop their panties. Both groups want it quickly. I've banged many of chicks off POF while in between LTR's. Most were 7's or 8's. All were within the first week of talking to them. It doesnt matter if they are looking for "no commitment or actively seeking marriage"....play them all the same. They will give it up. POF seems to have the same core group of chicks every time I get back on there which is once every 6 months to year. I will intentionally hid my profile for a few weeks on occasion, throw up a few new pics and its like new meat to these chicks.

3.) Tinder- I believe there are some decent girls on Tinder, some will bang quickly, some need time invested in them first. I have only banged one chick off Tinder and it took me having her come over twice. Not a dime spent on my end either time. Decent girl who wants more and I refuse.

4.) Match- Upscale Tinder. Some decent pulls from Match, most that I have talked to/met up with required a little bit of investing in before they gave it up. Most are looking for relationships. Normally after 3-4 meet ups if I'm not hitting it I bounce.

5.) EHarmony- Best selection of higher quality chicks of any OLD site I have been on. A few easy ones here and there, but it also seems like I have had to put the most work into the ones I've pulled on there.

Thats my breakdown....am I missing any good OLD sites and has anyone else seen different results from these OLD sites? A lot of it can depend on what area you live in too.

I've gotten a lot of good results off of OKC and Badoo(believe it or not---the old "Hot or Not")

 

[Bayne05]

I've gotten a lot of good results off of OKC and Badoo(believe it or not---the old "Hot or Not")

Badoo was the first dating site I used 2 years before it got so famous, got a pretty good number of lays. But now its getting dull, seeing the same fugly attention wh0res with 10 000 likes and they are always online.

 

[dustmuffin]

Dude, I have to give you props on this one...

I copied this word for word and have been having great success with it...almost makes it too easy.

Glad I could help you out. I think the reason it works is because it is direct. I have had women complain that it takes forever for some men to ask them out.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Glad I could help you out. I think the reason it works is because it is direct. I have had women complain that it takes forever for some men to ask them out.

Yep. Get right to the point. As Poon King says, **** or get off the ****ing pot.

 

[Juanto]

Yep. Get right to the point. As Poon King says, **** or get off the ****ing pot.

Is this based on experience with american girls, or european?

 

[EyeBRollin]

Is this based on experience with american girls, or european?

Does not matter.

 

[Tony Anthony]

Christian McQueen's blog is the ****. For stuff like this... https://realchristianmcqueen.com/20...dating-apps-that-will-help-you-get-laid-more/

 

[Building_and_Loan]

I had a date last night with **** close. She told me that she liked my direct approach of asking for the date immediately. She said she had texted for a month with guys who wouldn't ask for the date and didn't like it. I have heard this from numerous girls.. I had a date last nigh f uck close. A date tonight that I m very positive about a f uck close. Then a date sunday with a for sure f uck close.

The point of this is dont waste time. Ask her out. If she wants to text endlessly then move along. Don't let her pull you into her frame. Your time and attention is valuable.

Just recently joined the Tinder grind and this seems to be the way to go. For a second I tried to build some semblance of rapport through messaging but that **** doesn't work, it's impossible to establish rapport through messaging with someone you don't even know.

From now on I'll go with the direct approach, first message suggest a date for xx day.

 

[marmel75]

Go to a Lamborghini lot and take your next profile pic beside one.

Watch them come running.

Yeah and when he pulls up in a Ford Focus, what's the point. Might as well tell him to put up random hot model dude pictures too while he is at it.