The Duke
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2008
- Messages
- 5,605
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“The measure of a man’s mental health is his ability to say no to a woman”…Paul Elam
I’ve never had a problem eventually saying NO, but I am guilty of being tolerant/accepting for too long. I shouldn’t have. Its hard when you are raised to see the best in people, work with others, and assume their intentions are always good. However, as I’ve gotten older and wiser I don’t tolerate much anymore. I don’t need it spelled out in black and white before I decide to say NO or walk away.
These days, I have no problem telling a woman NO. When I see red flags I bail, I don’t wait for them to make my life hell. I trust my gut instinct more than I used to or maybe it’s the voice of past experiences telling me. I don’t rely on them explaining themselves. They rarely address the issue at hand in a rational manner. They are experts at shifting blame, redirecting, shaming, guilt tripping, etc and they will always take something rational that they did wrong and turn it into something emotional in an attempt to protect their ego and their relationship as well as derail the current accusations. The more you let them talk, they more they play on your emotions and try to convince you they did nothing wrong or things are not as they appear.
What prompted me to write this?.....Two girls I had recent dealings with and a few things I've read recently.
Girl #1. She was a smoking hot, HB9, 37yo, long blonde hair, big fake boobs, nice legs, little tight curvy body, exotic face, no kids. After a few encounters I realized she was very jealous and very conditional. In my past I would have dealt with this type of girl. I would have attempted to put her insecurities at bay. But I’ve learned in my past that you may suppress some of these personality flaws, but you will never rid them of it, Regardless of how skilled you are in dealing with people issues. Back in the day, a younger HowieStern would have signed up for a deal like this. Now days regardless of how hot they are, I have no problem saying NO. I don’t need to get fully immersed into a situation before I realize it’s a cess pool.
Girl #2 She was a single mommy, HB6.5(pretty face, great body shape, but 20lbs over weight), great personality, charming, super sechsual, 33yo. She appeared to have all of her finances in order. She kept saying things about she couldn’t decide if she wanted to sell her house and buy a new one or rent something. There was nothing wrong with what she had! Then she mentioned that investors were calling her wanting to buy it. That turned a red light on for me so I did a little digging and found a foreclosure document with the help of Mr. Google. So I kept that card close to my chest and got her talking about her house. I gave her a chance to be forthcoming and come clean. She had no clue I knew it had been foreclosed on. She did her best to try and mislead me. I waited 2wks more and then I found on the county tax appraisal website where it had been sold at auction and is now owned by an investment company. In the past I would have discussed this with her, explained what I found and probably fell for her bs story. Nowdays I say hell NO and stop seeing her. She sends me a texts asking why I was so distant. So I went ahead and told her that I don’t associate with people who can’t pay their bills and take the easy way out. That totally goes against who I am.
This sends her into a tail spin. I get accused of not communicating, blah blah blah. She tries to disarm me with emotional rubbage about how I hurt her feelings. BS what about my feelings!!! Every time I tell her to stick to the facts and talk about the house she is unable to do so. Finally I say enough is enough. Where there is smoke there is fire. I don’t need to stay engaged in the situation, and falling for her emotional terrorism plot.
I’m pretty quick to say NO these days and it feels really good. It feel’s fuhking real good to instantly reject these girls that don’t meet my standards. It feels empowering to say hell NO I won’t let you hang around just to cut me down to your level and take advantage of all the greatness I offer. These days, I prefer to say NO and go without, than tolerate things that don’t align with who I am in order to keep a piece of a$$ around. I’ve never been weak or needy, but I’ve never felt this strong. I will not discount myself. Hot pu$$y has always been hard to say NO to but I am stronger than it these days.
I’d rather be that lone wolf or eagle at peace with himself, solid as the rock he is perched upon, looking down on the rest. Sometimes its lonely at the top, but that’s fine by me. That’s part of living life on your own terms. When you have what they all want, they will always try and get a piece of it. They’ve been wired to go after those with skills and resources since the beginning of time. Put them to the test, place the hurdles high, make the road tough. If they want a piece of the greatness and see you in that light, they will rise to the occasion. Until then, stack them deep. They work for you, not you work for them. Stop giving them a second chance to make your life difficult.
I’ve never had a problem eventually saying NO, but I am guilty of being tolerant/accepting for too long. I shouldn’t have. Its hard when you are raised to see the best in people, work with others, and assume their intentions are always good. However, as I’ve gotten older and wiser I don’t tolerate much anymore. I don’t need it spelled out in black and white before I decide to say NO or walk away.
These days, I have no problem telling a woman NO. When I see red flags I bail, I don’t wait for them to make my life hell. I trust my gut instinct more than I used to or maybe it’s the voice of past experiences telling me. I don’t rely on them explaining themselves. They rarely address the issue at hand in a rational manner. They are experts at shifting blame, redirecting, shaming, guilt tripping, etc and they will always take something rational that they did wrong and turn it into something emotional in an attempt to protect their ego and their relationship as well as derail the current accusations. The more you let them talk, they more they play on your emotions and try to convince you they did nothing wrong or things are not as they appear.
What prompted me to write this?.....Two girls I had recent dealings with and a few things I've read recently.
Girl #1. She was a smoking hot, HB9, 37yo, long blonde hair, big fake boobs, nice legs, little tight curvy body, exotic face, no kids. After a few encounters I realized she was very jealous and very conditional. In my past I would have dealt with this type of girl. I would have attempted to put her insecurities at bay. But I’ve learned in my past that you may suppress some of these personality flaws, but you will never rid them of it, Regardless of how skilled you are in dealing with people issues. Back in the day, a younger HowieStern would have signed up for a deal like this. Now days regardless of how hot they are, I have no problem saying NO. I don’t need to get fully immersed into a situation before I realize it’s a cess pool.
Girl #2 She was a single mommy, HB6.5(pretty face, great body shape, but 20lbs over weight), great personality, charming, super sechsual, 33yo. She appeared to have all of her finances in order. She kept saying things about she couldn’t decide if she wanted to sell her house and buy a new one or rent something. There was nothing wrong with what she had! Then she mentioned that investors were calling her wanting to buy it. That turned a red light on for me so I did a little digging and found a foreclosure document with the help of Mr. Google. So I kept that card close to my chest and got her talking about her house. I gave her a chance to be forthcoming and come clean. She had no clue I knew it had been foreclosed on. She did her best to try and mislead me. I waited 2wks more and then I found on the county tax appraisal website where it had been sold at auction and is now owned by an investment company. In the past I would have discussed this with her, explained what I found and probably fell for her bs story. Nowdays I say hell NO and stop seeing her. She sends me a texts asking why I was so distant. So I went ahead and told her that I don’t associate with people who can’t pay their bills and take the easy way out. That totally goes against who I am.
This sends her into a tail spin. I get accused of not communicating, blah blah blah. She tries to disarm me with emotional rubbage about how I hurt her feelings. BS what about my feelings!!! Every time I tell her to stick to the facts and talk about the house she is unable to do so. Finally I say enough is enough. Where there is smoke there is fire. I don’t need to stay engaged in the situation, and falling for her emotional terrorism plot.
I’m pretty quick to say NO these days and it feels really good. It feel’s fuhking real good to instantly reject these girls that don’t meet my standards. It feels empowering to say hell NO I won’t let you hang around just to cut me down to your level and take advantage of all the greatness I offer. These days, I prefer to say NO and go without, than tolerate things that don’t align with who I am in order to keep a piece of a$$ around. I’ve never been weak or needy, but I’ve never felt this strong. I will not discount myself. Hot pu$$y has always been hard to say NO to but I am stronger than it these days.
I’d rather be that lone wolf or eagle at peace with himself, solid as the rock he is perched upon, looking down on the rest. Sometimes its lonely at the top, but that’s fine by me. That’s part of living life on your own terms. When you have what they all want, they will always try and get a piece of it. They’ve been wired to go after those with skills and resources since the beginning of time. Put them to the test, place the hurdles high, make the road tough. If they want a piece of the greatness and see you in that light, they will rise to the occasion. Until then, stack them deep. They work for you, not you work for them. Stop giving them a second chance to make your life difficult.
