How FORGIVENESS is your friend...

[Serenity]

Absolutely true! Forgiveness is to acknowledge what has happened, let it be and move on. It does not mean (as some actually think) that what happened or the actions done are acceptable for the future. It's only to accept the fact that the past can't be changed.

I had a hard time forgiving my mother. I couldn't just flip a switch and all her emotional abuse would be forgotten. I came to understand though that she was this way becuase it's what she knew, she was abused too from a young age. I carried resentment for quite some time over her, but I noticed that as I was angry at her I was starting to become like her. I was no better, I was doing exactly the same. It scared the sh!t out of me to become like that. I eventually forgave her and moved on, but I had to fight myself first. I forgave myself too though, but that isn't always easy.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

What about the cruel wicked step-mother. I think the doctor was prescribing all kinds of drugs/ tranquilizers for her back in the day. It makes passive neglect look like a God-send. My forgiveness of her cruelty coincided with maturity; I realized that she had herself had a very troubled upbringing... and simply was not in control of herself. As adults, us siblings would sit around moaning about the past, but at some point you just got to let sleeping dogs lie, and move on. She is now a little old lady going senile, and I feel sorry for her.

Also, it helps to arrange your own sorrows on a scale. And though I had less than the ideal childhood, I can consider myself as having come through relatively unscathed compared to the poor souls further down the scale. Perhaps we have to be grateful, before we can be forgiving.

 

[PantyWhisperer]

One of the best songs on this subject is "Heart of the Matter" by Don Henley, including the stellar line "the more I know, the less I understand". But I'm one who still struggles to forgive. The YouTube video on letting go of desire was a helpful new way to think about it. I think everybody is different in the amount of time they need to let go and let healing begin.

 

[Reykhel]

What about the cruel wicked step-mother. I think the doctor was prescribing all kinds of drugs/ tranquilizers for her back in the day. It makes passive neglect look like a God-send. My forgiveness of her cruelty coincided with maturity; I realized that she had herself had a very troubled upbringing... and simply was not in control of herself. As adults, us siblings would sit around moaning about the past, but at some point you just got to let sleeping dogs lie, and move on. She is now a little old lady going senile, and I feel sorry for her.

Also, it helps to arrange your own sorrows on a scale. And though I had less than the ideal childhood, I can consider myself as having come through relatively unscathed compared to the poor souls further down the scale. Perhaps we have to be grateful, before we can be forgiving.

Really good point that perhaps we have to be grateful, before we can be forgiving...

Those that practices gratitude, now how to be happy in the present moment. Those who practice gratitude, now what abundance
is. Those who practice gratitude usually are internally fulfilled.

That is a really good headspace to be in, which leads to easily been able to let slights and resentments and angers go (i.e. forgive).

What you have stated above "I realized myself that she had a very troubled upbringing" shows an ability to seek to understand first then to be understood.........which breeds compassion.....

Compassion (true compassion, not pity) rises you above less enlightened people and their human actions, almost in the form of a hight priest and they are your flock, your children.

True enlightenment has no room for a mind that holds onto resentments and grudges.

 

[MrAddiction]

We are going a bit off the point of game here.


The truth about this game is that everyone is merely looking to get their needs met. So why hate on anyone?

As I said before, understand women and you will just see them as naughty children trying to get away with something. It's ridiculous, really.

You can not stress that enough! That is the truth of the redpill in a nutshell!

One of the best sentences and descriptions of the redpill I have ever read!

Thanks for that Deesade. From all I have read from you so far, you really are ging to the essence of redpill.

MrAddict

 

[wifehunter]

I never forget.... so, for me, forgiveness is keeping sins/offenses out of my short term memory. But, sometimes their sh!t is too much, and you have to walk!

 

[Reykhel]

I usually let the small stuff slide. I am not going to risk jail or life itself to confront a motorist who cuts me off in traffic.

But when it comes to major offenses, you're damn right that I'm going to "play the game" as you say, even if it means going after the perpetrator and/or his surviving family members.

Let's take the case of the murderer
Andreas Lubitz (Google). He killed 150 people--and you expect the victims' family members to FORGIVE this azzhole??

I can see myself reacting to Lubitz with extreme violence--NOT forgiveness. This includes his surviving family, his doctors, and his employer, all who, in my opinion, failed to act responsibly and are therefore complicit in the murderer's act.

I will NEVER forgive murderers, rapists, etc. And in my mind, those who support them, abett them, are negligent in preventing acts by them, get equal treatment from me. I imagine that if my family member or loved one was murdered, I'd do whatever it takes to exact the pain and anguish that was bestowed upon me.

In my opinion, Lubitz' surviving family deserve NO peace, simply because the victims' families have no peace and will forever have to wake up each morning realizing that their son/husband was senselessly taken from them.

EYE FOR EYE.
TOOTH FOR TOOTH.

I understand where you're coming from completely.......however...

What you're talking about is a form of DIVINE JUSTICE.......

What I'm talking about is PURIFYING YOURSELF FROM NEGATIVE RESIDUE ENERGY FROM THE PAST......

The "past" could be something that happened yesterday or 20 years ago....you may not need to exact divine revenge as it may have been something trivial.......but you may need to extract the poison of resentment that may be coursing through your veins....

There's a story in King, Warrior, Lover, Magician....where a samurai warrior was given the task of finding and executing an enemy .....he found the guy and approached him with his sword drawn (objectively carrying out his task), upon approaching his target, the guy spat in his face.......the samurai warrior grew red with anger.......and withdrew his sword and walked away......why? because he knew acting in anger would have been acting from ego..........

.....initially he was acting from warrior energy