The moment you relax = she's gone

oOh Nasty

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One of the truths of relationships is that as soon as you stop being the leading man in her life, she'll start looking for someone else to take that spot. If it isn't supplication, it's complacency that makes her attention towards you wane.

Some men have naturally interesting lives, which is enough to keep women believing that you're the main character of her play, but those who don't should always find ways to keep her drama centered around you. I've always been seeing occurrences of this as a child but never understood it until now.

When I was about 8 or 9 years old, I saw my aunt come to my house once to visit my mother. I remember her getting angry because my mother told my uncle (my aunt's husband) that they went to a club. My aunt was expecting my mom to give my uncle some kind of excuse like "we were just at my sister's house that night."

Anyways, that particular uncle is an Alpha male in my eyes. He's an American man that married an extremely feminine Asian woman and has very conservative values. He also never supplicated during his marriage and I know that his wife respected him very much. This is why I wondered, years later, why something like this happened.

I think it was because he was so good at taking care of things that there was practically no drama at all. Even though he was an Alpha, my aunt always knew what to expect. She always knew what time he would come home. She always knew what time he would wake up and when he would go to bed. She knew what he would watch on TV and where he would take her and the kids on the weekends. She finally had that perfect life, yet it still wasn't enough. She was big on Disney movies with her kids, especially the ones with the damsels in distress (Sleeping Beauty, etc). Secretly, she still wanted to be the princess who eventually makes herself worthy for the main prince.

This one incident wasn't really too extreme, as their marriage was a very happy one up until the point when she passed away from cancer about 5 years ago. It was just interesting to see an Alpha male's feminine conservative wife sneaking around one night to go clubbing with her friends.

I never really had much when I was younger, yet women stuck to me like glue. Once they entered my world, they were always led to believe that I was giving all I had and risking a lot to achieve things that seemed almost impossible. I would also let them be a part of it by allowing them to work with me sometimes. I had enemies and allies and lots of acquaintances with diverse groups of people, so there was always something new to experience. Whenever I had a failure, I would play the beta game for a split moment and pretend that I had given up, only to show immense confidence again that I will rise back up. These girls loved it. The struggle was real, and I knew how to capitalize on it at maximum efficiency when it comes to the attention of women.

Obvious things. Chicks love a dude, especially underdogs, who challenge and move forward. But as soon as she starts feeling that you don't give a f*ck anymore and have become complacent in where you are, her need for leadership will start to look for a new outlet.

It would be nice to want to get away from life and rest on your woman's lap for a little bit. But don't do it for too long.
 

wifehunter

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It's OK... getting kicked to curb is good reminder to be a man!!! Always be moving forward, and things like this won't happen.
 

Reyaj

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Obvious things. Chicks love a dude, especially underdogs, who challenge and move forward. But as soon as she starts feeling that you don't give a f*ck anymore and have become complacent in where you are, her need for leadership will start to look for a new outlet.

It would be nice to want to get away from life and rest on your woman's lap for a little bit. But don't do it for too long.
This is the key to the post right here. It's so easy when in a relationship to get comfortable but we can't lose sight of what you wrote above.
 

Scaramouche

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Deär Cousin Nasty,
Almost agree with Royal Flush "...the underlying assumption is that women are monogamous. They are not. They are polyandrous, like men"I feel the vast majority are serial monogamous...I have read that there was evolutionary value to our Predeluvian ancestors in changing partners every four years...Polyandrous Women in my experience are so rare as to be virtually unknown,some give that impression when their fading charms needs an ego boost...But why not take a leaf from Uncle Nasties Book?...get an Asian Lass,for preference a Mainland Chinese,they are loyal....Genetically implanted,stability was the big thing when your life revolved around getting that Rice planted!
 

womensview

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I agree, but the underlying assumption is that women are monogamous. They are not. They are polyandrous, like men. Motive matters in this analysis.

Therefore, its no wonder that a man getting "complacent" i.e. focusing on something other than supplicating her adrenaline/anxiety addiction provides an easy out to conform with her nature. She makes absolutely zero effort to entertain herself or communicate her desire to her husband. Anyone who has experienced this knows that pursuing a woman who has begun to distance herself, thereby ending or attempting to end the period of complacency, achieves no positive result whatsoever. The decision to leave(excuse to leave) has been made.

Keep in mind that the man losing his job or getting sick or whatever often has the same result.

I would liken it to a guy that cheats on his pregnant wife because she won't have sex with him during the pregnancy...yea there's a cause and effect but lets face it he probably was looking for an excuse.
You know at 25 you are young and inexperienced. I was monogamous thru my 27 yrs of marriage and so was he. I saw him thru leukemia till the end, so please don't make assumptions about women who have been thru thick and thin with their man.
 

mrgoodstuff

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You know at 25 you are young and inexperienced. I was monogamous thru my 27 yrs of marriage and so was he. I saw him thru leukemia till the end, so please don't make assumptions about women who have been thru thick and thin with their man.
The "flakey hot chick" that we like around here isn't good for emotional needs and taking care of us. They don't do that. If you have money, a look they like or they can gain social points off of you, you may get to have sex with them. If your lucky they will use another "friend" to pay her bills and stuff.

I know women like you exist, my mom was one, and she was a model from 18-22. She has always been a one man type of woman, and she doesn't expect anything from a man she is not willing to give herself. So that's my model of a "good woman", oh and she phvcks her man nightly and doesn't do anything to detract from his masculine core.
 

Once Bitten

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The "flakey hot chick" that we like around here isn't good for emotional needs and taking care of us. They don't do that. If you have money, a look they like or they can gain social points off of you, you may get to have sex with them. If your lucky they will use another "friend" to pay her bills and stuff.

I know women like you exist, my mom was one, and she was a model from 18-22. She has always been a one man type of woman, and she doesn't expect anything from a man she is not willing to give herself. So that's my model of a "good woman", oh and she phvcks her man nightly and doesn't do anything to detract from his masculine core.
Dam. A woman like that our age these days is a flipping unicorn.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Dam. A woman like that our age these days is a flipping unicorn.
I found an older one, a bit heavier than I like but when she was younger was better. She's kinda like a man that she will roll up her sleeves and get it done with you. Also splits dates and buys gifts. She's 2-3 pts below the "hot girl" in looks, because it's not her realm, she doesn't waste as much time or energy on it. Plus she's an actual Christian and believes its her responsibility to submit to her husband, and also to fvck him nearly nightly unless there is a good reason.

But yea there aren't a lot of women like this. It was their mothers and peers telling them to "date around", "don't put your eggs in one basket", "think like a man", "don't treat a bf like a husband", etc all the deals they do to give males less good treatment.

I have heard from some women in the "slvt it up" phase that they get tired of it, and just want one man, their psychology is in conflict with social realities and it bothers them. So for many the "slvt it up" is a passing phase. The thing that sucks is they could've had all this "fun" and decide they don't have a desire or need to do it anymore, and hooks the male with sex and to get her baby, then she stops. Also that she may have done much wilder sex acts while she was having "fun" and you don't have a right to expect the same because you know that's how women are.
 

ubercat

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I'm not sure I want to make my life a soap opera to keep some woman interested. In fact I know I'm not because I ditched my Eastern European HB 8 x exactly for that reason. Why would a DJ care? He knows he can find another woman of same or greater value easily enough. I think doc love was on the money. If you offer a woman passion pampering Romance leadership and a bit of a social life that's good enough. If she's not happy with that get away from me and go make some other poor bastard miserable.
 
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womensview

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I'm not sure I want to make my life a soap opera to keep some woman interested. In fact I know I'm not because I ditched my Eastern European HB 8 x exactly for that reason. Why would a DJ care? He knows he can find another woman of same or greater value easily enough
Then do what is right for u. U are in control of what works or doesn't work and your goal is to be happy. So, make yourself happy.
 

oOh Nasty

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If you offer a woman passion pampering Romance leadership and a bit of a social life that's good enough.
Twas my point exactly.

I'm not saying make your life a soap opera. All I mean is that, as long as you are making her invest her emotions in some way or another into you, then that's good enough. The reason chicks dig jerks is because they just do whatever they want. Things such as IDGAF mentality, instilling a fear of leaving, etc. creates drama for her.

Natural Alphas, in my experience, are many times oblivious to the dramas they're creating for their women.
 
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