How to handle "Give me your number instead"

[bigneil]

So things seem to be going great with that bartender or waitress and you ask her to give you her number and she responds "Why don't you give me your number instead?"

Ouch.

There are three possibilities here, two bad:

1) You give her your number and giggle. You lost. She will never call you.
2) You write 1-666-F*CK-YOU on a slip of paper, or storm off, or say something spiteful. You lost. You didn't get the number.
3) Against all odds, you impress her by managing to still get her number. Maybe you say "Wow. That's not good. Nevermind then..." and she responds "What do you mean? Ok. I don't usually do this but you seem really cool so here is my number" (prefer having her write it down and staple her hand-written note in your scrapbook, they are often a great souvenir).

Odds are against you when she does this, no doubt, but I've managed to pull it off and have her eagerly write long messages almost immediately after.

Remember: asking for your number instead is a common final sh!t test a girl will put a guy through, one that most men fail. Be prepared to handle this smoothly to seal the deal.

 

[Mr Wright]

I just see it like this, if she's saying that, chances are she's not interested. The medium is the message to quote Rollo. I want to deal with that kind of bullshït game, if she's playing one I will not be there to find out.

However, I've started just giving my number to girl's who show obvious interest in a night time setting because if I can't pull her there and then, the flake rate goes up and don't need her in my life so she has to message me first. It grown out of a mixture of laziness because I know she is interested and reducing flake rates. Some of them take a few weeks, some the next day but they usually text.

 

[WanderingMan]

I forgot it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

[SuckItUp]

Lots of different ways to handle this situation. A girl asking for your number is clearly an IOD in almost all cases.

You can tell her to try a number to see if it works on your phone (I.e. New phone not sure of my number yet)

You could also give her the she's moving too quickly and/or what kind of women asks for a man'd number schtick.

The key is to make your number seem unattainable so that she concedes and gives her number instead.

Do understand you're working from low IL so most times it will not matter, but why make it easy for her. She expects guys to give her their number or refuse and be rude. Why not standout by teasing her and/or being funny about it.

 

[Yewki]

There are three possibilities here, two bad:

1) You give her your number and giggle. You lost. She will never call you.
2) You write 1-666-F*CK-YOU on a slip of paper, or storm off, or say something spiteful. You lost. You didn't get the number.
3) Against all odds, you impress her by managing to still get her number. Maybe you say "Wow. That's not good. Nevermind then..." and she responds "What do you mean? Ok. I don't usually do this but you seem really cool so here is my number" (prefer having her write it down and staple her hand-written note in your scrapbook, they are often a great souvenir).

The first option is actually the best. Don't make an issue out of it. If she calls cool, if not oh well

The other options just show that you place too much value on her and the outcome

 

[Poon King]

Never play a b!tches game. Only play YOUR game by your rules.

If I ask for a woman's number there is only one acceptable response: She gives it to me. If she refuses.. I walk away and forget she exists. Nothing to think about or analyze here.

MEN: Stop wasting time, emotional energy and brain power on women with LOW INTEREST. If a woman is not interested take the hint and walk away. There are other fish to catch. Only faggots reward women who reject them with more attention.

 

[devilkingx2]

"I lost my number can I have yours?"

also of course she won't call you, expect a text like a normal person duh

 

[El Payaso]

"I'm getting a new phone with a new phone number later this week so it would be better if you gave me your number and I'll hit you up when I get my new number."

 

[marmel75]

"I'm Good."

And walk away.

 

[logicallefty]

I would give it to you but whenever I give my number to a woman it always ends up written in womens' bathroom walls "For a good time call Lefty".

 

[skinnyguy]

Say "sure give me your phone and I'll put it in". Call yourself with her phone and bam you have her number.

 

[Trump]

So things seem to be going great with that bartender or waitress and you ask her to give you her number and she responds "Why don't you give me your number instead?"

Ouch.

There are three possibilities here, two bad:

1) You give her your number and giggle. You lost. She will never call you.
2) You write 1-666-F*CK-YOU on a slip of paper, or storm off, or say something spiteful. You lost. You didn't get the number.
3) Against all odds, you impress her by managing to still get her number. Maybe you say "Wow. That's not good. Nevermind then..." and she responds "What do you mean? Ok. I don't usually do this but you seem really cool so here is my number" (prefer having her write it down and staple her hand-written note in your scrapbook, they are often a great souvenir).

Odds are against you when she does this, no doubt, but I've managed to pull it off and have her eagerly write long messages almost immediately after.

Remember: asking for your number instead is a common final sh!t test a girl will put a guy through, one that most men fail. Be prepared to handle this smoothly to seal the deal.

Bro there is nothing to 'handle' a girl not giving you her number. You move on.

You are asking for something and she is resisting. 'Work harder for my number, I'm special.' There is no girl special enough for you to have jump through hoops to get her number.

 

[Desdinova]

Write down your number, hand it to her, and tell her "make sure you don't text me!" and wink. After that, don't expect anything. Occasionally you'll get a surprise, but don't bet on it.

 

[CuddleJunkie]

I rarely ask for phone numbers. I instead ask them first if they will meet me for a drink or two. When they say yes, they'll pretty much give you their phone number without even having to ask for it.

The ones who ask for my number get declined every time.

This. Ask for a real date, after the yes say "give me your number for the details". Done. Why would you want her number otherwise? The phone is just a logistical tool.

 

[EyeBRollin]

It's just not worth it. Move on. Find an interested woman.

 

[CuddleJunkie]

To be fair mate, that's always my close.

"I'm busy right now, but another time, I want to take you out for drinks".

Still a number close, if you haven't got the number yet. You still need the number to make the date.

If they say "okay", and give you the number, it still means nothing until you start the phone correspondence.

Kind of a moot point.

The point here is that a woman that won't give her number (or plays silly games over it) is a serious indicator of disinterest.

Has any guy here laid a woman this way? If so, I'd be interested to hear it. I would imagine that there was serious long-game and investment involved.

I've had a girl that asked common friends for my number after having a great time with me. I didn't ask her as I was just not interested as my sights were on another girl from the same group, but this really shows how interested women don't give mixed signals. That's why I ask first for the date, they still might flake, of course, but I think it makes it less likely. This is what Krauser does anyhow, I adhere to his teachings!

 

[Tenacity]

So things seem to be going great with that bartender or waitress and you ask her to give you her number and she responds "Why don't you give me your number instead?"

Then give her your number. You know what Tenacity does? I don't ask girls for THEIR number, I "close" by telling them to text me at (my number) in some variation to continue the convo later. If she texts me, she is interested to some extent at least....if she doesn't, then at least I know she's not so I don't have to keep calling/texting a bytch that's not interested.

Some chicks will take my number and text/call later......then some will say, "Here, just text/call me at (number)" with 96% of the time that number being a real number and she actually having some sort of interest on the table.

I started doing this to cut down the flakes because when I would ask her for HER number, I would get a phone book of numbers that only like 20% would be interested to some extent....the rest would be bad numbers, fake numbers, or numbers where the bytch never answered the phone/responded by text. So I said fvck it, if the bytch is interested have her text me FIRST by giving her my number.

There are three possibilities here, two bad:

3) Against all odds, you impress her by managing to still get her number. Maybe you say "Wow. That's not good. Nevermind then..." and she responds "What do you mean? Ok. I don't usually do this but you seem really cool so here is my number" (prefer having her write it down and staple her hand-written note in your scrapbook, they are often a great souvenir).

And usually if you have to go through ALL THAT, she will give you her number and still not do shyt with you (if she even gives you a real number).

Remember: asking for your number instead is a common final sh!t test a girl will put a guy through, one that most men fail. Be prepared to handle this smoothly to seal the deal.

Urgh, I hate this Manosphere created cartoon shyt lol. There's no such thing as "shyt tests", what you have is either a bytch who is flat out disrespectful, a bytch who isn't interested, or a bytch who is lukewarm (mixed signals, which to simplify I just put in the not interested pile).

You're having a convo with her and closing by asking for her number, then the bytch flips and says, "Ummmm....just gimme your number".....this is a bytch that's not interested. I usually just give her my number and walk off (NEXT) because I know nothing is coming out of it.

Bro there is nothing to 'handle' a girl not giving you her number. You move on.

You are asking for something and she is resisting. 'Work harder for my number, I'm special.' There is no girl special enough for you to have jump through hoops to get her number.

Thank you!

 

[Yewki]

Women aren't really sexually attracted to guys that they can tool. And getting a man to give her your number is getting tooled. Game over.

Refusing to give your number or making a problem out of it is weak behavior

You're saying that women are not sexually attracted to guys who give out their number to justify protecting your ego. If you were outcome dependent, you wouldn't care either way and would give your number... because why not, that's what friendly people do

 

[Yewki]

I am outcome dependent, and I speak from experience.

Oops I meant outcome independent, not sure if that's how you read it

I'm at the intermediate stage, and I'm trying to improve... Be friendly; just don't suggest it to those of us that know better, and are striving for something else.

I would argue whatever stage you're at you take girls too seriously. You mention dignity, but apparently sacrifice being friendly in order to game girls

 

[Bible_Belt]

Ranking women's occupation by the frequency they get hit on by men:
#1 - stripper
#2 - bar tender
#3 - waitress

If she's one of those three, the odds are stacked against you. Whatever your rebuttal is, you had better have it ready.