Hi guys,
I have been viewing posts on this forum a long time but never posted anything, reading posts on this forum has got me over a really bad break up that i had last years and made me realize the error of my ways with women plus made me sort my life out too. I used to have confidence without any self esteem and that is a dangerous combination to have with women. So i thank each and every one of you if have ever posted anything on here.
But my situation i believe unique to me and i cant find anything anywhere that can give me advice or ideas. so here we go.
I work with three ex girlfriends, I'm in my late 20's and all these was what i would call serious relationships to one degree or another. two of my exes are total fine with me I'm sleeping with one again at the moment and the other is engaged to a guy i knew years ago. but other is a different story (recent ex) we broke up last year after about a year together, i was unhappy in the relationship and i had a lot of depression with i had counselling for (she messed my head up but there was a lot of other crap going on too). then she broke up with me because i wasn't fun anymore but kelp sleeping with me for like 2 months after until i had enough. For the longest time after that i thought she had BPD or NPD but you can be never be 100% sure on without diagnosis. I'm just going to too list a few things so you can make up your own minds.
I know i have been devalued and discard but i see her every day so that should work in my favor for possible sex right?
Sorry for the long post but its a complex situation and any advice will be welcome.
I have been viewing posts on this forum a long time but never posted anything, reading posts on this forum has got me over a really bad break up that i had last years and made me realize the error of my ways with women plus made me sort my life out too. I used to have confidence without any self esteem and that is a dangerous combination to have with women. So i thank each and every one of you if have ever posted anything on here.
But my situation i believe unique to me and i cant find anything anywhere that can give me advice or ideas. so here we go.
I work with three ex girlfriends, I'm in my late 20's and all these was what i would call serious relationships to one degree or another. two of my exes are total fine with me I'm sleeping with one again at the moment and the other is engaged to a guy i knew years ago. but other is a different story (recent ex) we broke up last year after about a year together, i was unhappy in the relationship and i had a lot of depression with i had counselling for (she messed my head up but there was a lot of other crap going on too). then she broke up with me because i wasn't fun anymore but kelp sleeping with me for like 2 months after until i had enough. For the longest time after that i thought she had BPD or NPD but you can be never be 100% sure on without diagnosis. I'm just going to too list a few things so you can make up your own minds.
- Extremely selfish
- Never takes responsibility for her actions (always someone else's fault)
- Extreme mood swings (crying on the kitchen floor because she ruined a picnic blanket by putting it in the dryer by mistake) then fine 5 minutes later.
- Needs constant attention/validation (always on the phone texting, to her friends, mom or whoever)
- Materialistic (always talking about booking holidays,clothes and money)
- Very few friends
- Ran a smear campaign against her last ex (her family and friends hate this guy with a passion, i ask her once what did he do so wrong to make you hate him so much she said nothing really and i believe her) i have meet him a few times at work Xmas parties when they was together and was a nice guy to be honest.
- Childish (temper tantrums when didn't get her own way)
- Total lack of empathy
- Gas-lighting
- Push/Pull tactics
- Didn't know her real father but has had a stepdad since she was four
- Has a five year old daughter
- Bragged about cheating on her ex also about messing some other guy up
- I still think about her (a lot) i see her everyday even thought we work in different buildings she makes a point of coming over to my office at least once a day even more when she is looking hot (short skirt and high heels)
- Haven't really spoke for a year (i did used to text her last year without a reply from her) only spoke to me when she found out i had a interview for a promotion, she text me saying good luck and being very friendly for a few weeks after that but faded. we spoke last month at a works party she was asking lots of questions like if i was ever happy when we was together also am i sleeping with ***** again which i said yes (i was very drunk cant remember the rest of the conversation but we did speak for a while) hasn't spoke to me again since.
- I really do miss her daughter (i know how you guys feel about someone else's kid being in the picture but that never bothered me
- It was the best sex i have ever had and really want to sleep with her again (no more then that)
- Lastly two weeks ago my boss told me her mom had cancer because he knows i still care about her, i feel really bad for not asking her about her mom. (I know I shouldn't even care anymore)
I know i have been devalued and discard but i see her every day so that should work in my favor for possible sex right?
Sorry for the long post but its a complex situation and any advice will be welcome.