Does a man with a great career make a poor husband?

[MatureDJ]

I was reading through the comments on a blog (that I had posted about earlier) and was amazed to see one woman say that surgeons make poor husband material!

https://medium.com/@SandyO/fabulous-advice-2c4952a46f10#.de8nd8k04

But the other side of the coin is also dangerous. An adult man who is steeped in his career can also break your heart. You’ve learned Lesson One about men w/potential. Now you have a man at your side who has met his potential and has an established Future. Hot Tip: seek out Whether he IS his job, and all his energy will forever go there…is there Any energy left for you, to cuddle you, to Care? Be careful of doctors, esp. surgeons. They are so immersed in their jobs that their identify IS their job. They may have Chosen that specialty so they do not have to learn social or loving skills. You may wind up tightly married, but ALL ALONE, LOVELESS.

Let me get this straight - a man with a very nice income is someone that should be avoided? A man who busts his butt to bring home the bacon is not a good husband since he doesn't have any energy left to "cuddle"? A man who devotes himself to a career does so because he doesn't have to learn social or loving skills? WTF?

my opinion:

 

[BeTheChange]

I hear you, but the reality is most women would prefer a man who makes a decent income and is available to spend time with them on a consistent basis, than a man who makes 6 figures but whom they only see once a week and who might even be too tired to do anything fun or interesting.

It's about achieving that balance without compromising your goals and ambitions. I'm not saying you need to make women your number one priority in life, but I do think she needs to believe that she at least registers as being of some importance in your life.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Surgeons are high probability candidates to be sociopaths. They also have little social skills, as they've had their eye on the prize, so to speak, likely since they were in high school. Not a lot of time spent dating and chasing pvssy.

Long ago I used to work for a big medical company. A running joke was, "How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, because the world revolves around them."

 

[speed dawg]

Surgeons are high probability candidates to be sociopaths. They also have little social skills, as they've had their eye on the prize, so to speak, likely since they were in high school. Not a lot of time spent dating and chasing pvssy.

Long ago I used to work for a big medical company. A running joke was, "How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, because the world revolves around them."

Sounds like a good field for them, IMO. They can be all weird and cut on human tissue without being full-on crazies, while helping people. Guess there is some truth to Dexter.

 

[Rainman4707]

Agree with post number two.

 

[sodbuster]

I have a friend whose sister is married to a high power guy. He makes millions, is gone traveling during the season, and can't switch back after the season is over.... He still keeps the late hours. She wants him to spend time with the kids and banging her..... You can make the cash, but you still need to spend some time with her....

 

[Bible_Belt]

An ex of mine worked at a medical practice of about a dozen surgeons. There were three divorces out of the twelve doctors in the three years she and I were together.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Sadly this may be true. I've always been a hard worker and very determined. Hate to say it but my long working hours has affected my past two relationships. They want the money but at the same time they want you there all the time. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

 

[Trump]

But the other side of the coin is also dangerous. An adult man who is steeped in his career can also break your heart. You’ve learned Lesson One about men w/potential. Now you have a man at your side who has met his potential and has an established Future. Hot Tip: seek out Whether he IS his job, and all his energy will forever go there…is there Any energy left for you, to cuddle you, to Care? Be careful of doctors, esp. surgeons. They are so immersed in their jobs that their identify IS their job. They may have Chosen that specialty so they do not have to learn social or loving skills. You may wind up tightly married, but ALL ALONE, LOVELESS.

What a woman says and what a woman wants are 2 separate things. She is feeling unloved so she has to say this to protect herself. Who said they have chosen there speciality so they do not have to learn loving skills? Maybe you are not good looking enough for him to love you. If you were a Hollywood Star, I think he would rush home.

Total judgement to make herself look good.

 

[SkrooU]

 

[The Duke]

If you want the good(wealthy provider), you better be willing to accept the bad(not enough attention to the relationship, his mind is somewhere else).

I have a serious hobby/side career/passion I do that is more like a 2nd full time job. It requires tons of time in the evenings and lots of time spent traveling on weekends 8months out of the year. Its very demanding and requires a tremendous amount of focus, dedication, and sponsors to do any good at it.

It strains every relationship I've ever been in. I've heard all the complaints....."our relationship is like 2 ships passing in the night"....."I feel alone in this relationship".....blah blah blah. I have to really work to stay balanced and fair in a relationship and dedicate the time necessary to my significant other.

BUT they all knew this from the start, I never hid any of it, I warned every single one of them. And they were all attracted to the fame, spot light, attention, and notoriety that came with my hobby and wanted in on that. Just like women chase after money.

You gotta be willing to take the good with the bad. There's a reason the guys at the top get rewarded with money and power. They constantly make sacrifices to achieve that success. They do what the others aren't willing to do. I grew up with a dad that was working/traveling all the time and involved in politics. He made lots of money, had lots of power, everybody knew who he was. You can bet I noticed my dad was gone a lot and it had an effect on me. I wished I had a dad that could of thrown the baseball around more with me. Done more father/son bonding activities with me. But later in life he did make up for it.

True success in life is all about balance. Money will never be worth more than your memories. I never had kids because I knew I would have to give up on my hobby/dream and I for sure wasn't willing to short change my kid because I know what that felt like.

 

[Powersurgeon]

Surgeons are high probability candidates to be sociopaths. They also have little social skills, as they've had their eye on the prize, so to speak, likely since they were in high school. Not a lot of time spent dating and chasing pvssy.

Long ago I used to work for a big medical company. A running joke was, "How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, because the world revolves around them."

Hey! I'm a surgeon, and that joke is great!

 

[PantyWhisperer]

Surgeons are high probability candidates to be sociopaths. They also have little social skills, as they've had their eye on the prize, so to speak, likely since they were in high school. Not a lot of time spent dating and chasing pvssy.

Long ago I used to work for a big medical company. A running joke was, "How many surgeons does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, because the world revolves around them."

I work in healthcare and I second your opinion. Center of the universe mentality. Neurosurgeons and heart guys being at the top of that diva pyramid.

 

[Alvafe]

I work in healthcare and I second your opinion. Center of the universe mentality. Neurosurgeons and heart guys being at the top of that diva pyramid.

from most I know they have huge egos, that is true, I wouldn't say a surgeon don't have game, most likely they do because they have to know how to tell people someone they just operate died, and hope to not get a sue.

but one thing is woman also like to bet the center of the atencion even more from the men they like/want so they in general have little free time, so more then likely she will just feel he don't care about her, with in msot cases he really don't, he jsut get a pretty woman to be his wife and be done with it.

but fot the OP, that is more like a powerplay, a guy who devote all his time for his job will not waste time with her, so more likely if she try to grab power it would fail for his lack to even note it. note too they are guys who will work like crazy without stop and if is not work nothing else matter

 

[zekko]

A man who devotes himself to a career does so because he doesn't have to learn social or loving skills? WTF?

I thought this article was going to be about husbands not having time to spend with their wives because they're working so much. But they make a good point about energy. When you get older especially, energy becomes a resource that you have to budget. And as the years wear on, a demanding career can wear on you.

Regarding the part about "he doesn't have to learn social or loving skills", I don't know if it's so much that he doesn't have to as maybe he didn't have time for it. If he was putting himself through medical school as a young man, he probably missed out on a lot of partying and socializing. It reminds me of those posts that talk about how deadbeats can be attractive to women because they have nothing to do but have fun. When you don't have any responsibilities you can be out late, drinking, doing drugs, hitting the gym, banging women. The focus is on fun. Meanwhile the guy working on his career is stuck in the medical school or hospital.

Doesn't matter. I've always said that given the choice, I'd rather have money than women.