Something is up but dont know what exactly

[ranch1973]

Hi there!

New to the forum and in need of an unbiased opinion, please.

The other day I was vacuum cleaning the sofa and I found grey hair on it. I checked the hair and it had roots, like human roots. We dont have pets.

When I asked my wife she said she didnt know anything about it but mentioned that might be from kid's toy, a white baby sea-lion.

3 days later, and without me asking a thing, she brought it up again and mentioned that might be even from the blankets or something.

What she never said was that might be mine or her fathers...never!, which would have been the most logical and fast answer.

And since June this year she talks by phone with a rediscovered girlfriend like 5 to 7 times a week, some calls lasting 30 minutes or so.But she always wait till I am out of the house (but I can see in the phone bill the calls).

Maybe I am reading too much into this whole thing, dont know, but the calls got me wondering, very much.

What do you guys think ?

Its all too strange.

Thanks!

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

Are there any changes in behavior?

New clothes, weight loss, working out? New interests?

-Augustus-

 

[Asmodeus]

Hi there!

New to the forum and in need of an unbiased opinion, please.

The other day I was vacuum cleaning the sofa and I found grey hair on it. I checked the hair and it had roots, like human roots. We dont have pets.

When I asked my wife she said she didnt know anything about it but mentioned that might be from kid's toy, a white baby sea-lion.

3 days later, and without me asking a thing, she brought it up again and mentioned that might be even from the blankets or something.

What she never said was that might be mine or her fathers...never!, which would have been the most logical and fast answer.

And since June this year she talks by phone with a rediscovered girlfriend like 5 to 7 times a week, some calls lasting 30 minutes or so.But she always wait till I am out of the house (but I can see in the phone bill the calls).

Maybe I am reading too much into this whole thing, dont know, but the calls got me wondering, very much.

What do you guys think ?

Its all too strange.

Thanks!

Uh oh...

I smell a rat... Do you have a lot of money, you can hire a private investigator (she will never know)... The evidence of her infidelity will be strong support for you if she gets furious and asks for a divorce because then you can claim fault on her.

 

[Desdinova]

The other day I was vacuum cleaning the sofa and I found grey hair on it.

Maybe her puzzy coughed up a hairball.

If there's one thing I've learned from my job, it's that hair can travel far and wide. Also, the sun can bleach hair if left long enough.

I think you're over-reacting.

 

[speed dawg]

Are there any changes in behavior?

New clothes, weight loss, working out? New interests?

-Augustus-

This. Look at overall behavior. Is she pulling back sex? Acting distant?

I have no clue if this is some other dude's hair or not, but the fact that she's hiding conversations from you (guy or girl) is a red flag. And even with this, you have to discern. If I'm talking on the phone, I always walk outside and away from people. You need to observe her body language. Is she purposely leaving you? Or is she just the loner type? Only you know these things.

 

[Dingo]

You know something is up.... Trust your gut...

Have you called the "girlfriends" number ?

 

[SuckItUp]

Hi there!

New to the forum and in need of an unbiased opinion, please.

The other day I was vacuum cleaning the sofa and I found grey hair on it. I checked the hair and it had roots, like human roots. We dont have pets.

When I asked my wife she said she didnt know anything about it but mentioned that might be from kid's toy, a white baby sea-lion.

3 days later, and without me asking a thing, she brought it up again and mentioned that might be even from the blankets or something.

What she never said was that might be mine or her fathers...never!, which would have been the most logical and fast answer.

And since June this year she talks by phone with a rediscovered girlfriend like 5 to 7 times a week, some calls lasting 30 minutes or so.But she always wait till I am out of the house (but I can see in the phone bill the calls).

Maybe I am reading too much into this whole thing, dont know, but the calls got me wondering, very much.

What do you guys think ?

Its all too strange.

Thanks!

Unfortunately there's an extremely high likelihood that she is cheating/has cheated or is contemplating cheating.

You know this because people who find a random hair don't give it a second thought, but since you asked about it you knew in your gut that things weren't adding up.

You also knew things were wrong because she brought it up 3 days later with no provocation, which begs the question why wasn't her original answer sufficient, and why is she putting that much effort into figuring out where a "random" hair is coming from.

The cincher is the "newly refound friend" and making calls in private. If you are married, aside from a short call to the gynecologist why would any woman conceal that she's making the call.

Of course there's 0.000001% chance she's planning some huge surprise and has been concealing it from you, but at those odds you already know what is going on, and for that I can say I feel you because I've cheated on before and it's a terrible feeling.

 

[Glassguy]

Block the call and call the number. You'll have your answer

 

[Sho-No-Luv]

Hmm, lots of good advice given here.

1. Hire private investigator
2. Do Dna test on her panties (checkmate)
3. Wire private camera/recorder in car and home. Try using Gps phone tracking services
4. check mileage on car odometer
5. Check social media accounts
6. Schedule a surprise trip out of town somewhere and rent a hotel room. She will probably refuse. But if she agrees you will be able to monitor her cell phone usage better.
7. If she works make a surprise trip to her office. If she asks why tell her that you just want to take her to lunch.
8. Come home early from work
9. Check all your accounts checking/savings etc, make note of time place and date of all her transactions. Compare these times and dates to the times you can't get a hold of her
10. Don't be surprised if you call the number and a female answers because she could be cheating with a woman.

Finally, and this is the most important part dont let on that you're suspecting anything, don't pry to much, do everything on the back end. If shes an experinced cheater you will need a private investigator, because women like this are just to crafty.

She will have an answer for everything and it will be close to impossible to catch her. If she is in love or later falls in love then she will drop her guard a little, if not good luck on catching her by yourself.

My experience had been that alot of women tend to cheat with guys that they work with, esp older women.

 

[The Duke]

Hair does have a way of migrating from place to place so I wouldn't put too much stock in that but I wouldn't rule it out either. the fact that she brought it back up days later is interesting! ;-) And that old friend she is talking to is another intersting tidbit.
When my ex wife cheated on me there were many signs:
-Came home late from work.(she was spending time with him)
-Spent more time at the gym.(she was spending time with him)
-Went to more work related happy hours.(hanging out with him)
-Stayed up late watching tv.(she was texting him on her phone. Every time I'd walk into the room, she turned her phone off).
-Stopped going with me on weekends to participate in my hobby.(spent time with him while I was gone)
-Started going to the mall more often on weekends.(the mall was their meet up spot half way between my house and his house).
-She started buying new lingerie. Dressed sexier. Was spending $600/mo at Victoria's Secret. A big f'ing Secret that was until I saw the credit card statement.
-Turned me down for sechs and when we did have it, she wasn't as into it as she usually was.
-She started hanging out with some new friends. Stopped hanging out with one of her best girl friends. Her best girl friend and I were friends as well. Her best girl friend didn't approve of what she was doing. But Don't ever expect her best girl friend to call her out even if you are in tight with them. They might not approve of what she is doing, but they aren't going to rat her out either. I tried my best to get her best girl friend to cough up the goods and never could make it happen.
-She started embezzling money into an account I didn't know about. (Make sure to run a credit report on her and it will show all the accounts in her name.)
-She met this guy thru her work, he did contract work for her company.
-When my grandma died my exwife of 14yrs wasn't sure if she could get off work to come to her funeral. This crushed me to pieces. Right then I knew she was fuhking around on me. This was totally out of character for her. She ended up going and there was total weirdness between us like never before, I wished she wouldn't have come. I'll never ever forget how she made me feel that day. Total disrespect to me and my family.

The best way to catch them, is just go about life like every thing is cool. Just simply observe and make notes on their behavior, and actions and how they deviate from normal. Eventually it all surfaces and becomes very clear. And when you have a mountain of evidence collected you call them out on it and tell them to go to hell and get the fuhk out of your place immediately. Don't allow them a chance to explain and make up more lies.

I hope this never happens to any of you guys. It was the hardest thing I've ever gone thru in my entire life. I'll never trust a woman to this extent ever again. I learned my lesson. Honor/Loyalty/Respect are things that mean something only to men.

 

[Sho-No-Luv]

Hair does have a way of migrating from place to place so I wouldn't put too much stock in that but I wouldn't rule it out either. the fact that she brought it back up days later is interesting! ;-) And that old friend she is talking to is another intersting tidbit.
When my ex wife cheated on me there were many signs:
-Came home late from work.(she was spending time with him)
-Spent more time at the gym.(she was spending time with him)
-Went to more work related happy hours.(hanging out with him)
-Stayed up late watching tv.(she was texting him on her phone. Every time I'd walk into the room, she turned her phone off).
-Stopped going with me on weekends to participate in my hobby.(spent time with him while I was gone)
-Started going to the mall more often on weekends.(the mall was their meet up spot half way between my house and his house).
-She started buying new lingerie. Dressed sexier. Was spending $600/mo at Victoria's Secret. A big f'ing Secret that was until I saw the credit card statement.
-Turned me down for sechs and when we did have it, she wasn't as into it as she usually was.
-She started hanging out with some new friends. Stopped hanging out with one of her best girl friends. Her best girl friend and I were friends as well. Her best girl friend didn't approve of what she was doing. But Don't ever expect her best girl friend to call her out even if you are in tight with them. They might not approve of what she is doing, but they aren't going to rat her out either. I tried my best to get her best girl friend to cough up the goods and never could make it happen.
-She started embezzling money into an account I didn't know about. (Make sure to run a credit report on her and it will show all the accounts in her name.)
-She met this guy thru her work, he did contract work for her company.
-When my grandma died my exwife of 14yrs wasn't sure if she could get off work to come to her funeral. This crushed me to pieces. Right then I knew she was fuhking around on me. This was totally out of character for her. She ended up going and there was total weirdness between us like never before, I wished she wouldn't have come. I'll never ever forget how she made me feel that day. Total disrespect to me and my family.

The best way to catch them, is just go about life like every thing is cool. Just simply observe and make notes on their behavior, and actions and how they deviate from normal. Eventually it all surfaces and becomes very clear. And when you have a mountain of evidence collected you call them out on it and tell them to go to hell and get the fuhk out of your place immediately. Don't allow them a chance to explain and make up more lies.

I hope this never happens to any of you guys. It was the hardest thing I've ever gone thru in my entire life. I'll never trust a woman to this extent ever again. I learned my lesson. Honor/Loyalty/Respect are things that mean something only to men.

So what was the final straw, did she ever own up to it?

 

[The Duke]

The final straw was when we had a "coming to jesus, ****'s gonna hit the fan" meeting to present everything I found after about 3months of collecting evidence! I played it very calm/cool up until this point. That day, I called her and told her to come home immediately after work because we needed to talk. It was about a 6hr intense conversation. I showed her the hundreds of texts/calls to a certain phone number, and everything else I had gathered. It was all in a notebook, I didn’t miss a damn thing. I even had the name of who the phone number belonged to.

I asked her if she fuhked this dude and she looked me straight in the face and calmly said no. I had no doubt she was lying. All I wanted was for her to be honest with me and she never was.

She road the cahk carousel for about 5yrs after our divorce. When she finally got off and figured out what a great deal she left behind she got depressed, and fat then started going to counseling. She started talking to my sister trying to feel her out to see If she could get back with me.
I hadn't talked to her for several years and then I get a phone call. Her counselor recommended that she call me and apologize for what she did. However, she still never came out and said “hey, I’m sorry I cheated on you.” But I knew, and she knew. All she ever said was she was sorry for her actions.

These days she is remarried to a “nice” guy that is over weight, zero edge to him, boring, & clueless when it comes to women. She has a guy she can control and is not a threat. He is into her more than she is him. She got the total opposite of me. He’s a very safe bet……but she isn’t happy. She used to be an HB8, probably a HB6 now….glad I got the good years.

Always be thankful for the good times you have with all these girls and enjoy it while it lasts guys…..nothing lasts forever especially these days. Its best to let old dogs lie and get you a new puppy!

 

[Sho-No-Luv]

The final straw was when we had a "coming to jesus, ****'s gonna hit the fan" meeting to present everything I found after about 3months of collecting evidence! I played it very calm/cool up until this point. That day, I called her and told her to come home immediately after work because we needed to talk. It was about a 6hr intense conversation. I showed her the hundreds of texts/calls to a certain phone number, and everything else I had gathered. It was all in a notebook, I didn’t miss a damn thing. I even had the name of who the phone number belonged to.

I asked her if she fuhked this dude and she looked me straight in the face and calmly said no. I had no doubt she was lying. All I wanted was for her to be honest with me and she never was.

She road the cahk carousel for about 5yrs after our divorce. When she finally got off and figured out what a great deal she left behind she got depressed, and fat then started going to counseling. She started talking to my sister trying to feel her out to see If she could get back with me.
I hadn't talked to her for several years and then I get a phone call. Her counselor recommended that she call me and apologize for what she did. However, she still never came out and said “hey, I’m sorry I cheated on you.” But I knew, and she knew. All she ever said was she was sorry for her actions.

These days she is remarried to a “nice” guy that is over weight, zero edge to him, boring, & clueless when it comes to women. She has a guy she can control and is not a threat. He is into her more than she is him. She got the total opposite of me. He’s a very safe bet……but she isn’t happy. She used to be an HB8, probably a HB6 now….glad I got the good years.

Always be thankful for the good times you have with all these girls and enjoy it while it lasts guys…..nothing lasts forever especially these days. Its best to let old dogs lie and get you a new puppy!

Damn man, they very rarely come on out with it, not unless you do what I did, he, he, he. I caught one female I was dating right in the act ***** had lied her ass off to me for three months straight!

 

[sodbuster]

When your gut tells you something.....listen

 

[channingtatum]

I think you already know the answer here. Call the number using a blocked number, you'll get your definitive answer.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Type the number into Google and see if anything comes up. It doesn't always work, but I have found people that way, when all I had to go on was a number with no name.

Also, if you set up a recording device to eavesdrop on a conversation, check your state wiretap laws first. Twelve US states have "two party consent" laws, which would make recording her a felony, even if she is your wife.

 

[Malcontent]

The hair is "whatever" but the phone calls are suspicious as f--k.

 

[Sho-No-Luv]

One other thing, I think thats being overlooked here. My ex did the phone thing and it was exactly who she said it was(her old best female friend) except, she left out the part about them conspiring together on what was the best way for her to leave me.

In other words my ex was talking behind my back and complaining to her friend and her friend convinced her to leave me. This is quite probable. Certainly you don't think that they do it all alone eh?

No they have co conspirators and IF there is another guy her best friend likely knows about him and is in on it. This is esp true when her bestie is having serious marriage problems herself (misery loves company) women in those type of scenarios are toxic!

 

[backseatjuan]

Android phone? Use program called reptilicus, let's you listen.

 

[MrWood]

Old tech but I caught mine by setting up the VCR to record 6hr audio in the home... it caught her talking on the phone to the dude she was fvckin

this avoids any wiretapping laws btw.