Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
I'm 5 months into a relationship, and have literally not received even one sh!t test. Why is this, one might ask?
It's all about establishing frame early. I mean right from the very first interaction. That, plus the character quality of the woman to begin with, virtually eliminates sh!t tests.
What is "establishing frame"? It is the careful conveyance of your social value combined with the clear message that you don't need her and that she is a guest in your kingdom. You don't verbalize these things outright... you demonstrate them.
How does one demonstrate value and dominance? You convey decisiveness, you live by the mantra of IDGAF, and you work on the craft of implanting social proof in her imagination by your words and story telling.
How does one convey social proof by words and story telling? That is an art that is rarely discussed here. You talk about your experiences (both past and current) and people's reactions to you in those experiences. All you do is hint about people's positive reaction to you. She will do the rest of the work, imagining you in that situation and filling in the blanks with an idealized scenario with you as the star. I sometimes say, "I don't get it, but women have always said I have nice [fill in the blank]. I have no idea why." This can be a physical attribute or a character attribute. Act like you're a bit puzzled about it, yet you're happy that it is true. Of course there should be some truth to the attribute. Your goal here is to amplify it and cement it in her mind.
Believe me, men, she will attribute that quality to you simply because she heard that other women have approved of you in that regard. Needless to say, you use this sparingly and in a nuanced way. I told her that about my legs, and now she constantly makes a (positive) fuss about my "masculine and beautifully shaped" legs. Insert wink here...
Tell her that beauty is common. Tell her it's so easy to find a beautiful girlfriend... They're a dime a dozen. But it is very hard to find quality character. Here you're diminishing her power of attractiveness and vaguely complimenting her on her character.
I realize this is mostly fortune-cookie stuff, nothing much new, but the point I want to drive home is that you must start early. YOU are responsible for the tone of your relationship, not her. She is clay that must be molded and shaped to conform to your life.
Your frames must be absolute, conveyed without even a hint of doubt. She will believe virtually ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that you believe. Given enough time, I can make a woman "know" that the sky is green with purple polka-dots. The power that a man has over a woman's imagination is profound.
Start early. Display your dominance over LIFE ITSELF. Display dominance over time and space. All of this definitely comes more easily as you get older, but the time to start is now, no matter what your age.
As I said, I haven't received even one sh!t test from my woman yet. Does she have one waiting in the wings, ready to deploy when needed? Quite possibly. But the point here is that she doesn't show a pattern of sh!t testing because she is able to relax into her feminine nature with me since she perceives me as a masculine, decisive man. A woman who is relaxed into her femininity cannot sh!t test you. The whole reason for a sh!t test in the first place is for her to reassure herself that you are strong.
I'm well aware that with my woman, her natural character and the fact that we share the same spiritual beliefs has gone a long way to our compatibility (meaning, she is not representative of the majority of women), but all women can be dialed down to behave by adopting these principles, and adopting them EARLY.
Never forget that for a woman to love you, she MUST perceive your value to be higher than hers. Your main source of value in her eyes comes from social value, so involve yourself in activities that provide you with opportunities to achieve social influence.
Following these principles will also serve to eclipse your faults and weaknesses.
Within this framework of influence and the IDGAF paradigm, a man is free to be gentle (at appropriate times), loving, gentlemanly, protective, polite, etc. because these treats are given within the rock-solid framework of a solid framework and core.
Ideally you should be considered "wise" in her eyes. When you convey strength and decisiveness, she will automatically consider you to be wise and she will talk herself into falling in love with you if you follow the above-mentioned precepts.
Lay your foundation early. The man is the actor, the woman is the responder. The man is the giver, the woman is the receiver. The man is the penetrator. He penetrates her emotions first, then her mind, and finally her body. The penetration of all three completes a spiritual transference. But that is a subject for another time.
It's all about establishing frame early. I mean right from the very first interaction. That, plus the character quality of the woman to begin with, virtually eliminates sh!t tests.
What is "establishing frame"? It is the careful conveyance of your social value combined with the clear message that you don't need her and that she is a guest in your kingdom. You don't verbalize these things outright... you demonstrate them.
How does one demonstrate value and dominance? You convey decisiveness, you live by the mantra of IDGAF, and you work on the craft of implanting social proof in her imagination by your words and story telling.
How does one convey social proof by words and story telling? That is an art that is rarely discussed here. You talk about your experiences (both past and current) and people's reactions to you in those experiences. All you do is hint about people's positive reaction to you. She will do the rest of the work, imagining you in that situation and filling in the blanks with an idealized scenario with you as the star. I sometimes say, "I don't get it, but women have always said I have nice [fill in the blank]. I have no idea why." This can be a physical attribute or a character attribute. Act like you're a bit puzzled about it, yet you're happy that it is true. Of course there should be some truth to the attribute. Your goal here is to amplify it and cement it in her mind.
Believe me, men, she will attribute that quality to you simply because she heard that other women have approved of you in that regard. Needless to say, you use this sparingly and in a nuanced way. I told her that about my legs, and now she constantly makes a (positive) fuss about my "masculine and beautifully shaped" legs. Insert wink here...
Tell her that beauty is common. Tell her it's so easy to find a beautiful girlfriend... They're a dime a dozen. But it is very hard to find quality character. Here you're diminishing her power of attractiveness and vaguely complimenting her on her character.
I realize this is mostly fortune-cookie stuff, nothing much new, but the point I want to drive home is that you must start early. YOU are responsible for the tone of your relationship, not her. She is clay that must be molded and shaped to conform to your life.
Your frames must be absolute, conveyed without even a hint of doubt. She will believe virtually ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that you believe. Given enough time, I can make a woman "know" that the sky is green with purple polka-dots. The power that a man has over a woman's imagination is profound.
Start early. Display your dominance over LIFE ITSELF. Display dominance over time and space. All of this definitely comes more easily as you get older, but the time to start is now, no matter what your age.
As I said, I haven't received even one sh!t test from my woman yet. Does she have one waiting in the wings, ready to deploy when needed? Quite possibly. But the point here is that she doesn't show a pattern of sh!t testing because she is able to relax into her feminine nature with me since she perceives me as a masculine, decisive man. A woman who is relaxed into her femininity cannot sh!t test you. The whole reason for a sh!t test in the first place is for her to reassure herself that you are strong.
I'm well aware that with my woman, her natural character and the fact that we share the same spiritual beliefs has gone a long way to our compatibility (meaning, she is not representative of the majority of women), but all women can be dialed down to behave by adopting these principles, and adopting them EARLY.
Never forget that for a woman to love you, she MUST perceive your value to be higher than hers. Your main source of value in her eyes comes from social value, so involve yourself in activities that provide you with opportunities to achieve social influence.
Following these principles will also serve to eclipse your faults and weaknesses.
Within this framework of influence and the IDGAF paradigm, a man is free to be gentle (at appropriate times), loving, gentlemanly, protective, polite, etc. because these treats are given within the rock-solid framework of a solid framework and core.
Ideally you should be considered "wise" in her eyes. When you convey strength and decisiveness, she will automatically consider you to be wise and she will talk herself into falling in love with you if you follow the above-mentioned precepts.
Lay your foundation early. The man is the actor, the woman is the responder. The man is the giver, the woman is the receiver. The man is the penetrator. He penetrates her emotions first, then her mind, and finally her body. The penetration of all three completes a spiritual transference. But that is a subject for another time.
