May have got caught spinning plates, how to recover?

jts3443

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2015
Messages
42
Reaction score
3
Age
32
I was just starting to see a girl, we had went out a few times, about 4 or 5, had great sex, and her interest level was very high; She had just gotten out of a bad breakup a few months ago and I believe I was the first person she got intimate with since. Again her interest level was very high, but she had basically opened up to me and told me she really liked me, but it was confusing for her, in a "I'm so attracted to you, but I told myself I wouldn't get involved with anybody" sort of way, she continuously apologized for being complicated so I basically told her that I didn't care, that I was just enjoying myself and not even thinking that deep into it, than I continued to fack her. So I assume she understands were casual for now. The other night I was at a party, and wound up seeing, and hooking up with an old flame. Somehow me and the old flame making out ended up on someones snapchat, (I was really drunk), and theres a good chance this girl saw it (we have a mutual friend who may have saw it and told her). She text me the next morning asking how the party was, she was originally going to tag along but got called into work. We text for a little and I haven't heard from her since, about 4 days ago, which is weird because she usually hits me up everyday. I'm not positive she heard about the me and the other girl, but theres a really good chance.

Anyone else ever run into this problem and were you able to recover and keep that plate spinning? Normally I would just play it off, tell the girl how awesome she is and act like it wasn't a big deal, but seeing as this girl was a bit 'damaged" and was starting to feel a bit of trust for me, it may not be a girl I can recoup. Thoughts?
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,695
Reaction score
7,734
Location
USA, Louisiana
Sorry nothing you can do to recover from this. She is looking for something you can not give her. She will either accept that things are the way they are and that you are causally dating, or she won't. Nothing you can do about this, it's all on her.
 

jts3443

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2015
Messages
42
Reaction score
3
Age
32
She will either accept that things are the way they are and that you are causally dating, or she won't.
Definitely agree, but in my defense, she straight up told me she was damaged from the last relationship mentally, and made it seem like she wanted to be casual, although she didn't act it. I'm curious what do you mean 'she is looking for something I can not give her?"
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,695
Reaction score
7,734
Location
USA, Louisiana
She says she is looking for a man that will commit ONLY to her. All women say things like this, and they mean it ONLY after they have picked you. It's like Pook says, nobody wants a bird that is going to just fly into a cage. Women say they want this but they REALLY want a man that is in demand. Normal women will try and work for you... like you said.. this one is broken. She needs time to get over her ex then she'll be ready to act like a sane woman. If you had just dated her. she would be dumping you in a few months wondering if she can do better since you were too easy to rope in.
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
7,231
Reaction score
5,636
There is nothing to recover from. You were not exclusive with her, you never discussed being exclusive, and there is nothing to apologize for. If she can't handle that then that is her problem, not yours.

If access to her pvssy is that big of a deal then I guess you could have caged yourself and made yourself exclusive but I wouldn't have advised it. Not your job to bring it up, it's hers.
 

dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 21, 2015
Messages
2,516
Reaction score
1,435
Age
61
I would just ask her out again. If she ignores you you have your answer. If she accepts and asks you about the party, be aloof, evade, deflect and remind her that you are not exclusive. See where it goes from there.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2010
Messages
2,586
Reaction score
339
Age
34
Location
Atlanta
Just act like it didn't happen. It's none of her business who else you are kissing/fvcking.
 

grayclif

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2009
Messages
540
Reaction score
226
Deny everything while presenting her with a subtle smirk. Always be escalating. Let her decide what she wants to do. Besides what do you care you're spinning plates brother man.
 
Top